


Pick Me

by NuwaWuxia



Category: C-Pop, NINE PERCENT (Band), 乐华七子NEXT | NEX7, 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Awkward Flirting, Bad Flirting, Bias(es), Bonding, Brother-Sister Relationships, Brotherly Love, Competition, Dancing and Singing, Domestic Fluff, Ensemble Cast, F/M, Falling In Love, First Time, Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Friendship/Love, M/M, Making Out, Male-Female Friendship, Mutual Pining, Pining, Rivalry, Seductive dancing, Slow Burn, Smut, is this flirting?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:55:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 133,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26259769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NuwaWuxia/pseuds/NuwaWuxia
Summary: Zhu Zhengting's twin sister moves into the NEXT apartment. The boys fight to be her bias while she tries to get their band back on track. Will she pick the quiet Bi Wenjun, serious Xinchun, sweet Zeren, moody Chengcheng, adorable Little Hamster or confident Minghao?Read to find out!<3 This started as a cute fluffy competition and then it turned into a rambling love story about my favorite boy and the girl he deserves. <3Thank you for your support!
Relationships: Ding Zeren/original character
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

“My sister is going to be here in a few hours, you all better be cleaning!” Zhengting yelled at his didis as he scrubbed the toilet everyone else refused to clean. 

Justin appeared in the doorway of the bathroom and leaned against the doorframe. “Is your sister the empress?” he asked sarcastically. 

“There is no empress, dummy,” the oldest boy said, too busy worrying to joke around. 

He didn’t know why he was so worried other than his constant need to impress everyone all the time. His twin sister had never been particularly impressed with him, but only because she knew everything he was capable of. She had also been working for Yue Hua entertainment as a studio musician, and recently a song writer, and was just returning from working in South Korea for a few years. At Zhengting’s request, they were allowing her to live with the boys for a few months while she helped them with their next record. 

“Is your room clean?” Zhengting asked the youngest member, since he was still hovering in the doorway. 

“She’s not staying in my room!” Justin yelled.

“No, but I don’t want this flat to smell like your dirty socks, so get to work.” Zhengting pointed the toilet brush at him and the boy ran away. He went out to the living room where Zeren and Xinchun were playing video games. Frustrated at the mess around them, he turned to Wenjun who was the only one helping. “Can you help me with them?” he asked desperately. 

The tall boy shook his head as he tied up a very full trash bag. “They are beyond help.”

Zhengting sighed as he looked around the room. Even though he didn’t want to burden her, he was glad his sister was coming so he would have some help playing mother to the younger boys. 

Suddenly, Quenzhe came rushing around the corner with a trash bag and began throwing in all the empty water bottles, energy drink cans and snack wrappers strewn around the living room. “I’m helping, dage!” he cried as he worked quickly. 

“Thanks, Little Hamster,” Zhengting smiled at him, relieved to have some help. Of course he always knew he could count on Wenjun. 

“I wonder who her bias is,” Zeren said without taking his eyes off the TV.

“Her bias is me!” Zhengting smacked him in the back of the head with a rag, having little effect. 

“That’s weird, bro,” said Xinchun. “Her bias would have to be someone she wants to date. So my guess would be Chengcheng.”

“Bet!” said his friend as he defeated the minion in the game. “I bet it's Wenjun.”

“Are you kidding?” Justin came wheeling out of his room, which was closest to the living room. “Of course I’m her bias.” 

The two on the couch looked at each other before falling over with laughter. “Dude! You’re way too young to be her bias,” Zeren said between fits of laughter. 

“Love knows no age, gentlemen.” Justin crossed his arm and tried to make a sexy face. 

“My sister isn’t going to love any of you!” Zhengting said before turning on the vacuum to shut them up. 

Chengcheng had tried to stay out of the apartment all morning in order to avoid Zhengting’s whip, but eventually he got tired of being followed by fans all morning, so he gave up and returned home. He could still hear girls screaming outside of the apartment building when the doors opened to let in other residents. He tapped his foot anxiously as he waited for the elevator and finally felt relief when he heard the ding. He got in a hit the button for the top floor. 

“Wait!” he heard a female voice call out just as the doors began to close. Instinctively he put his hand out to stop them and then stepped back to the back wall of the car. A girl standing about five-four came rushing around the corner, dragging a large suitcase behind her. “Thanks,” she exhaled as the doors slid closed. 

She tried not to look at Chengcheng as the car started to move. 

“What floor?” he asked, extending a hand toward the buttons. 

“You got it,” she said, waving her hand and still trying to catch her breath. 

She kept her eyes straight ahead while he looked her up and down. She was wearing tight, ripped skinny jeans and a white cropped sweatshirt that showed her stomach, which was slender even as it puffed out from her exertion. Her facial features were delicate and her long black hair swept down to the bare part of her back. He thought she looked familiar, but he knew he hadn’t seen her on the elevator before. When they arrived at the top floor he allowed her to exit first and followed her down the hallway, not realizing they were going to the same place until she stopped at the apartment door and waited for him. He narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously and then wanted to slap himself for his mental slowness. 

He sucked in air through his teeth. “You must be Zhu Zheng Qiao.”

She bit her lip and smiled, nodding her head. 

“I’m Fan Chengcheng,” he said, extending his hand to her. 

She laughed as she took his hand. “I know.”

“Oh, right,” he said, feeling like an idiot for the second time in less than thirty seconds. He stood there for a few seconds more just looking at her.

“Are you gonna open the door?” she asked, swaying back and forth a little, feeling more awkward as the seconds ticked by. 

He wanted to run his head into it, but quickly stuck his key in and turned the handle. “Special delivery,” he said loudly as he walked in. 

“Meimei!” Zhengting cried and threw his arms around his sister’s neck. “Come in, come in, come in!”

The boys who were sitting in the living room were still oblivious to her arrival until Chengcheng went over and turned off the TV, quieting their groans by gesturing to their guest. Justin, Quanzhe, Zeren and Xinchun all jumped up and automatically lined up from youngest to oldest with Chengcheng in the middle and Wenjun, arriving late and standing apart from them, against the wall. 

“Hello, everybody. I’m Zhu Zhengqiao from Yue Hua.” She bowed and they went crazy. Her brother hugged her again, wearing a huge smile and already feeling a hundred times better. 

Justin started to bow and say his name, but she stopped him. 

“No, please! I feel like I know you guys already. I hope we can not be so formal.” She went up and gave him a hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, Justin.” He hugged her back and gave Zhengting and a shocked but thrilled look. 

“Little Hamster!” she smiled as she moved on to hug Quanzhe. He gave her a big smile and she couldn’t help pinching his cheek, making him giggle. 

“Chengcheng,” she said quietly with a sly smile, but didn’t give him a hug, making all the other boys raise their eyebrows. 

“Zeren.” She hugged him and then ruffled his hair. He blushed. 

“And minion!” she cried enthusiastically as she hugged the last boy in the row. 

“Good to see you again, Wenjun,” she said with a wink. The other five boys looked over at him in awe. He smiled and waved, but maintained his aloof position on the wall. 

“Thank you all for welcoming me,” she said finally and went back to her brother’s side. “You’re all so much taller in real life.”

Justin clicked his tongue and shook his head. “Dage, I didn’t think you could be prettier if you were a girl, but I was wrong.”

“Yeah, now there are two little fairies living here,” Quanzhe beamed and clapped his hands.

Other than the fact that she was shorter than her brother and his hair was currently purple, they did look a lot alike.

“Do you dance as well as your brother?” Zeren asked, already dreaming about dancing with her. 

She waved her hands in front of her. “Oh, gosh, no. I’ll leave the dancing to you two. I’m just the accompaniment.”

“There’s a keyboard in my room. You can play anytime!” Chengcheng offered quickly. All the other boys looked at him with smiles restraining laughter. He cleared his throat and looked at his shoes. 

“Down boys!” Zhengting told them and linked his arm with hers. “Come on, meimei, I’ll take you to our room.”

“See you guys later,” she said with a wave and allowed herself to be led down the hallway. Wenjun took her suitcase from her and followed them. 

“Is this all you brought?” Zhengting asked when the three of them were safely in his room. 

“Mhm. This is practically all I own anymore,” she replied, sitting on the empty twin bed she guessed was hers. 

“I hope you don’t mind sharing a room with me.” The two boys sat across from her on his bed. 

She shrugged. “We’ve shared a room most of our lives. It will be like old times. But I should be thanking you for letting me stay here. I was dreading having to find a place in the city. I hope I’m not imposing too much.”

“Are you kidding?!” Zhengting flew across the room to wrap his arms around her again. “I’ve missed you so much. Besides, we need all the help we can get with these boys. Right, Wenjun?” The tall man smiled and nodded. “And then we get to write some music together! I’m so excited. This is going to be great. I’m just worried for you,” he admitted. 

“Don’t worry,” she assured him. “I can handle those boys.”

“I don’t know,” Wenjun spoke for the first time. “I think you might destroy them.”

Her eyes widened. “They can’t be that fragile, can they?” she wondered. 

The five other boys were sitting in the living room again. They’d returned to the topic of biases in hushed tones. 

“Did you see the way she winked at Wenjun?” Zeren asked. “It’s definitely him.”

“When did they meet before?” Quanzhe wondered from his seat on the floor. They all shrugged. 

“I still think I have a shot,” Justin said, louder than everyone else. “She hugged me first.”

Xinchun hit him on the back of the head. “That’s because you were the first one in line, dude. It’s got to be Chengcheng. You saw the way she smiled at him.” He nodded to the boy sitting apart from them. “You came in with her. What did she say to you?”

Chengcheng was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, staring at his fingertips where they were touching. “Nothing,” he said, thinking ruefully about how stupid he had been. “She doesn’t have a bias for any of us. She doesn’t see us as idols. We are just her brother’s dumb friends.” That’s what he was telling himself anyway. He found it a little bit comforting. 

The other boys, noticing he was in a gloomy mood again, left him out of the discussion. 

“She said we were tall,” Zeren smiled proudly.

“No, she said we looked taller than on TV. That’s not the same thing,” Justin teased. 

“Five ten is above average,” the dancer proclaimed. 

“Not this again,” Quanzhe complained. “It’s okay, gege.”

“Let me show you around,” Zhengting said, taking her arm again. They headed further down the hallway to show her the dance studio and the bathroom she would be sharing with him, Wenjun and Zeren. Then they headed back to the center of the large apartment where the livingroom and kitchen were. He tried to lead her through without getting mobbed by the younger guys. “Over here are the other bedrooms, including Chengcheng’s keyboard,” he said suggestively, tossing a glance at the rapper, who buried his head in his hands. “But I hesitate to lead you back there.”

Zeren and Xinchun tapped Quanzhe aggressively on the shoulder and gave him little kicks until he popped up from his spot on the floor and skipped over to stand in front of Zhengqiao. He stood with his hands folded neatly behind his back and gave a backward glance at his older brothers, who urged him on. He leaned down and whispered something in her ear. 

“Oh,” she said, carefully avoiding looking at the other guys in the room. “Hmm.” She tapped her chin and paced away from him a little, dragging out all their suspense. “B-O-O-G-I-E Wang Ziyi,” she said carefully with a mischievous smile.

“WAAAAHHH!!!”

They all fell about the place. Chengcheng peeked at her through his fingers.

"No, no, no," she laughed, covering her mouth. "I'm just kidding! It's Lin Yanjun."

A general outcry. 

“No!” cried Quanzhe, “It has to be someone from NEXT!”

“Oh,” she said again as they all calmed down and waited for her answer. She scanned the room. She sucked in air. “It’s too hard to choose.” She threw her hands in the air. “Sorry, guys. I like you all so much.”

They all groaned. 

“She just doesn’t want to hurt your feelings,” Justin said confidently. She just shrugged and smiled. 

"Okay, I want to take a nap and then we can all go out for hotpot later? My treat." Everyone clapped and smiled at her enthusiastically, already forgiving her for breaking their hearts.

"At least she didn't say Xukun," Zhengting told them as she walked away.

Qiao emerged from her room a few hours later wearing the same jeans and sweatshirt as before to find six of seven boys of NEXT dressed nicely, many wearing button down shirts and jackets, their hair perfectly styled and make up done. She had at least redone her makeup brushed her hair, but she felt underdressed.

"I thought we were just going to eat hot pot!" She whined.

"When the seven of us go out we have to look our best," Xinchun explained, even though most of them had really done it to impress her. 

She groaned. "Okay, give me two minutes!" 

"You look great!" They yelled. “Come back!” She was already taking off down the hallway and ran smack into Zeren coming out of his room, sending him into the wall.

"Oh my god! Are you okay?" She reached up to touch his head where it hit the wall. He looked into her eyes and nodded, dazed. "I'm so sorry!" She said before taking off again.  
She started ripping off her clothes the moment she was through the doorway, not even bothering to close the door. She reemerged minutes later wearing a black mini skirt and red sweater with black knee high boots.

"Wow, you change so fast," Wenjun looked at her, amazed. 

"It's a gift," she said, out of breath. 

"I guess we will have to take two cars this time." Wenjun took two sets of keys off the hooks by the door and tossed one to Xinchun.

"I'll drive," Chengcheng said, taking the keys from Xinchun and walking past Wenjun through the open door. They all shrugged at each other.

They rode the elevator down to the garage quietly. 

"Jiejie, ride with us," Justin said, pulling on her arm toward the car where Chengcheng was already waiting in the driver's seat.

She grimaced playfully at her twin as she glanced back at him, but went along willingly. 

"You sit shotgun," Quanzhe told her, holding the door open as Justin and Zeren climbed in the back. The other two gave him a dirty look as he crammed in with them. 

"I don't like this arrangement," Zhengting grumbled as he watched his sister get in the car. 

Wenjun placed a long thin hand on his shoulder. "I'm more worried about them."

Chengcheng sighed when he saw Qiao get in the car beside him. He thought the other boys must be doing this to punish him and wondered how he would embarrass himself next. Unhappily, he started the car and set off for their favorite hot pot restaurant. 

Zhengting had booked a private room for them, but that didn't stop fans from noticing them as they walked in. They smiled nicely for all the cellphone cameras and made hearts with their hands. They were shown to their room and sat with Quanzhe, Justin, Zeren and Xinchun on one side of the table while Wenjun, Zhengting and Zhengqiao sat on the other. Chengcheng arrived last and sighed again at his bad luck as he saw the only open seat next to the pretty girl. She had begun to pick up on his displeasure around her and gave him a half-hearted smile as he sat down. The boys began to argue over what to get and she told them all just to order what they wanted.

After their order was taken she called their attention. "Okay. Time to get to know all my new didis," she smiled mischievously. 

"What do you want to know?" Quanzhe asked eagerly. He was one of the most outgoing, but also the least interested in her.

"Tell me what you would be doing if you weren't an idol." She folded her hands under her chin and smiled. 

"Policeman," Justin said proudly. 

"Soccer player," Quanzhe high-fived his bro.

Zeren stroked his chin and thought for a minute. "Choreographer."

"I would still be in school, and then I would become a designer," Xinchun replied and she nodded approvingly.

She turned to look at Chengcheng beside her. "Producer," he said quietly before taking a drink of his water. She tried to smile at him, but he wouldn't look at her, so she turned to Zhengting. 

"Nothing," he said. "I'll perform or nothing." He looked at his sister for approval and she placed a firm hand on his arm and smiled kindly at him before she looked past him to Wenjun.

"I'm an actor," he said in the indicative and they all glanced at each other nervously. He cleared his throat. "I mean that's what I do when I'm not with these guys. That's what I would still want to do." He shifted awkwardly, knowing he was letting them down. 

Their food started to come out and they were momentarily distracted. 

"Okay, next question. Three words to describe what girls you like, so I can start looking for wives for all of you." They all laughed awkwardly. 

"I like girls who are sensible, kind and cute," Xinchun answered first as he placed ingredients into the spicy broth. 

"I want a girl who's funny, pretty and a good dancer." Zeren looked at her with bright eyes.

"I don't really care what she looks like as long as she's nice and gets along with my family," Quanzhe nodded.

"Chengcheng?" She asked, since Justin was focused on the food. 

He himself was fishing around for vegetables in the pot. "I like a girl who's about 170 centimeters, good body and pretty eyes." He found some potato and popped it in his mouth. All the boys 'oooo'ed.

"Her personality doesn't matter?" Qiao wondered. 

"I like it if she feeds me," he responded with a smile, his first of the day. Food always did improve his mood.

She laughed appreciatively.

Justin cleared his throat to get her attention. "I like older women, who are nice and have a good appetite." He winked at her. Everyone laughed as she started to fish around in the hot pot.

Everyone but her looked at Wenjun. 

"Oh," he seemed surprised it was his turn. "Delicate, tall, with a good sense of humor."

They all turned their eyes on the twins. "What kind of guys do you like, meimei?" Zhengting asked her awkwardly. 

"Hmm," she thought slowly, looking at the seven sets of eyes focused on her. "Handsome face, creative, makes me laugh. Someone who is sensitive." They were all hanging on her words, wondering how they measured up. "Oh, and tall."

Zeren's mouth dropped open. "How tall is tall?" He wondered out loud.

"Oh, at least 177 cm," she smiled.

Zeren pumped his fist. He still had a shot. Chengcheng laughed at him. "Zeren, you're not sensitive."

"And you're not funny!" Zeren replied.

"And neither of you are as handsome as me," Justin chimed in.

"Meimei, please stop torturing our little brothers. They should all know they have absolutely no chance with you." Zhengting smiled.

"Okay, okay. Everyone just eat." She waved them away and went back for more food.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, so UNIQ hasn't put out any new music in like two or three years, so this definitely falls in the realm of fiction...  
> On the topic of UNIQ, if you have not seen this battle where Zeren definitely owns Yibo, you should: https://youtu.be/VUOYXyY3v7U
> 
> Also if this video of Open your ai hasn't been a part of your life, it definitely should be: https://youtu.be/b0MkrFe1NBY

In the morning Qiao woke up early and was pleased to find all the ingredients for pancakes. She had expected bare cupboards, but they appeared to be full stocked. She put on a pot of coffee and got busy making the batter. 

Xinchun was the first to wake up and stumble toward the kitchen. He went straight to the coffee pot, pleasantly surprised to see it already full. After pouring himself a cup, Qiao handed him a short stack of pancakes without saying a word. His jaw dropped, but then he smiled. "I'm so glad you're here, jiejie," he said as he sat down with his plate. 

She smiled back, still sleepy.

Chengcheng came in next, shirtless and in his boxers. He'd forgotten she was staying with them until he saw her small feet with his half-open eyes fixed on the floor. They followed up her bare legs in shorts all the way up to her face. Recognizing her he screamed and tried to cover himself with his hands before jumping back behind the wall.

"I have a twin brother, Chengcheng," she said without looking. "I don’t care."

"I'll be right back," he mumbled and slipped back to his room to put on sweats.

When he came back a moment later and sat at the kitchen counter next to Xinchun she placed a plate of pancakes in front of him. 

"Does anyone want eggs?" She asked. Both nodded. She laughed and turned back to the stove.

"Do you always get up this early?" Chengcheng asked with his mouth full.

"No, but I have a meeting at Yue Hua at 9."

He nodded. "Me, too. I can drive you," he offered, getting up for a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," she said quietly as he slipped by her in the tight space. 

Zhengting came in next, his hair stuck out in every direction. He looked around at her work. "Careful not to let them get used to this treatment," he warned her. She smiled weakly. "Your meeting is this morning?" She nodded. "Are you nervous?" 

She shrugged. "No," she said, even though she was a little. Qiao had neither the level of perfectionism nor the need to be liked that her brother did. Growing up he had relied on her confidence and she didn't want to seem shaken now. She was mostly nervous because his work and hers would be intertwined for the first time and she didn't want to disappoint him. 

She had a tall stack of pancakes made before any of the other boys woke up. She was sure they would be late risers. She ate very little herself before going to get ready. By eighty thirty she was waiting nervously for Chengcheng in the living room.

"Ready?" He asked quietly, pulling her away from her thoughts. She nodded and followed him out.

They didn't speak at all as they drove to the Yue Hua headquarters. They checked in at the reception desk and sat down next to each other.

"Is this your first time meeting with execs?" He asked her, rubbing his hands nervously on his pants. 

"At the Beijing office. I was in Seoul for almost two years."

"Don't be intimidated," he told her.

"I'm not that easily intimidated," she smiled, putting on a brave face. 

"Of course not," he laughed uneasily

"Are you nervous?" She asked, looking up at his face.

"No, I'm just meeting with the producer about a song." But his face couldn't lie.

"Did you write it yourself?" He nodded. "I'm sure it's great."

He smiled, appreciating the encouragement.

A door opened to their right. "Zhu Zhengqiao."

"Good luck," Chengcheng said, giving her a thumbs as she stood up. She smiled back nervously and went through the door.

She followed a small woman with shoulder length red hair down a long hallway. Whenever she was in these settings she felt she wasn't quite fashionable enough to work here. She always tried to dress professionally and sensibly in these situations so she wouldn't be seen as too young. She was led into a large boardroom. There were two serious and wealthy looking men and one woman at one end of a long table.

"Zhu Zhengting?" The one in the middle asked. She bowed deeply. "We have heard good things from Seoul. Glad to finally meet you, please sit."

"Thank you," she bowed again before sitting at the other end of the table. 

"Let's get down to business. The company is really pleased with the work you did with UNIQ on their last album. We are hoping you can get similar results with NEXT."

She nodded. "Thank you."

The woman to his right spoke for the first time. "We will be honest. The group is becoming scattered with other projects. We want this album to help bring them back together and reinvest the boys and their fans in this project. The guys have asked for more freedom in writing their own songs. We also want their songs to be more relatable to the audience. So we want you to help them write songs that will appeal to young women like you."

"Okay. I will do my best," she promised. 

"One other thing," the third man spoke up. He turned her attention to a screen on the wall. "This picture was posted on Weibo last night." It was her standing between Bi Wenjun and Justin. "We have put out a statement already explaining that you are Zhengting's sister and will be working with them. You should know now that when you go out with them your picture will be taken. You are part of the circle. You need to look good, but not too good. And you can't be seen as too familiar with them. Stick close to your brother and try to keep the outings to a minimum. Understand?"

"Yes, sir. I understand." She nodded, although she felt more nervous now than before. 

"Okay. I think that's all we needed to say. Do you have any questions?" The first man looked at her keenly. 

"No, sir. Thank you for this opportunity." She stood up. 

"We hope to hear something from you all by the end of the month."

"We will work hard. I won't let you down," she promised. She bowed and quickly left, relieved that the meeting hadn't lasted long. 

She was surprised to see Chengcheng just entering through the door to the lobby.

"You're done already?" He asked as they met.

"Yeah."

"Is that good or bad?"

"I think it's good." She smiled, feeling more at ease. 

"Oh, well, I don't know how long I'll be. Do you want to wait?" 

"That's okay. I haven't spent much time in the city, so I'll just make my way home alone," she told him.

"Okay," he said. "I'll see you later." He turned and she watched him walk away.

Beijing dwarfed Seoul and Shenyang, and made her hometown of Me’anshan look like a small village. She didn’t think she’d ever seen so many people, and it made her feel a little lost. She was relieved when she found the apartment building and was able to breath again. 

When she got to the apartment it was too quiet, until she suddenly heard music blasting from the direction of the dance studio. When she got to the room she saw Zeren, Zhengting, Justin, Quanzhe and Xinchun all dancing, while Wenjun laid spread out on his back in the corner of the room. It looked as though Zeren was driving them all. She stood in the doorway trying not to interrupt until the song ended. 

“Looks good boys,” she finally said, clapping, even though it hadn’t looked that good at all. 

“Meimei!” Zhengting cried, running over to her, sweat streaming off his brow. “You have to help us. Zeren is trying to kill us. He dances too fast!” He tried to hug her but she pushed him away, not wanting to get drenched in sweat. 

“No mercy!” yelled Zeren. “He called us fat after we ate all your pancakes, and told us we needed to work out. Call me fat now!”

“You’re not fat, teacher! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” The oldest boy sank to the floor and bowed, begging for mercy. 

Qiao walked across the back of the room to stand over Wenjun. “I think Wenjun is the one who needs mercy,” she said, picking up his lifeless hand and letting it fall back to the floor. 

“Wenjun needs an ambulance,” he groaned weakly. 

“Wenjun needs more practice!” Zeren yelled. He ran over and picked up Wenjun’s arm and tried to pull him up, but the tall boy just flopped back down. 

Then BTS’s “Danger” came on the playlist next and Zhengting ran over to his twin. 

“Meimei, you remember?” He gave her a huge smile. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She turned her head away from him. All the other guys looked at them in confusion. 

“Yes, you do,” he said, pulling her to the middle of the room by her arm. 

“No.”

She stood with her arms cross and watched him in the mirror as he started to dance. He smiled at her in the mirror and she couldn’t help smiling back. She dropped her arms and started dancing with him. 

“AAAAAHHH!!!” the other guys erupted. Even Wenjun picked his head up to look briefly before collapsing again. 

When it was over she ran away to lay on the floor next to Wenjun and gasped for air. 

“You said you couldn’t dance!” Zeren cried, standing over her. 

“That’s not exactly what I said,” she replied, her chest heaving. 

“She could be in our next music video!” Quanzhe said.

“Leave me and Wenjun out of this.”

“More!” they yelled. 

She sat up. “No. No more. No more. I’ll really die.” She took a deep breath and exhaled. “I will help you write your next song though,” she announced. 

“What?!” Justin exclaimed, joining the boys around her. 

“That’s why she’s really here. She’s going to help us write some songs for the next album,” Zhengting said, sitting beside her. 

“Are you qualified to do that?” Justin asked suspiciously. 

“I did study composition at Shenyang,” she admitted, glancing at Wenjun who finally sat up to join the conversation. 

“Wait! Is that how you guys know each other?” Zeren asked, more sure than ever that his prediction was right. They both nodded. “Did you guys ever…”

“No!” they said at the same time. 

“We’ve always just been friends,” Qiao said, looking at her brother, who looked at Wenjun.

“Anyway, she’s just being modest. She composed two of UNIQ’s songs from their most recent album,” Zhengting told them. 

“Which ones?” Justin wondered.

“I’m not telling,” she said, locking her lips.

“Do you have any songs for us yet?” Quanzhe asked. 

She shook her head. “Not yet. They need to sound like you. So, I’m gonna hang around for a while and we will figure them out together. I think it’s gonna be fun.” She smiled at each of them. 

“Qiao-Jie, Qiao-Jie,” Quanzhe started to chant, joined by Justin and Zhengting as they went marching out of the room. Zeren grabbed her by the hands and tried to talk her into dancing more, but she just rag dolled into Wenjun and they both played dead. He gave up and went over to his phone to change the song. Wenjun stood up with great effort and quietly exited the room. She slid to the back corner and leaned against it while Zeren walked to the center of the room. He had thought she left with Wenjun but turned to her when he saw her in the mirror. 

“Can I watch?” she asked and bit her lip shyly. He turned his head and gave her a curious look. “It’s just that I think you’re so talented. Don’t tell my brother but you’re the most talented dancer I’ve ever seen.”

Zeren smiled, very satisfied but also feeling a bit shy. “You can stay for one song, for the one you gave me earlier, but after that you’ll have to pay up.” She cocked her head. “A dance for a dance,” he explained. 

“I’ll take my one dance now, then,” she smiled. 

He walked back to choose a different song and then went back to dance to “Open your (love)”. She watched him dance, slack-jawed until the very end. Every move he made was perfect, and it was almost enough to make her want to dance with him. It was enough to make her want to do other things with him, too, but she tried not to think about that. When he was talking, Zeren seemed to have only one or two volumes and rhythms: usually loud and in your face. He was funny, but not very serious with words. But when he danced he seemed to be able to say anything. He could convey sexuality and power and emotion with his body better than he ever could with words. 

When he was done he sat down beside her and rested his head against the wall. He had put everything into the dance and he had to admit he was now a little tired. "What do you say?" He asked, gesturing to the dance floor.

"How did you know that was one of my favorite songs from that album?" She wondered, still mystified by his performance. 

"Really?" His eyes widened. 

She nodded. “But when I see you dance to it, it’s my number one.”

He smiled, very pleased with himself. Then he turned to her, his expression changing slightly, more enthusiastic. "Am I your bias?" He demanded loudly, pointing his finger at himself.

She threw her hands up as if to declare her innocence. "I told you I don't have a bias!" She cried.

"You're going to have to choose one of us, eventually," he insisted and rested against the wall again. "Are you going to dance for me now?" 

"Oh, definitely not."

"Come on!"

"No! I can't dance like you. I have no moves."

"I don't believe you." He got to his feet.

"I swear it's true."

"Fine. Then your dance god, Ren gege is going to teach you. I’m a good teacher," he promised. He grabbed her arms and pulled her to her feet. “Okay, follow me.”

She stood still and stared at him as he did the first move. 

“It’s easy,” he encouraged. “Just like this.”

She smiled and suppressed a laugh, but began to play along.

“Perfect. Next.” He did another move, and then another, and she copied him. “Great, let’s put it all together.” They did the series of moves. “Okay, now.” He did a more complicated move, but she still followed along. Then something about the moves started to feel familiar. “Okay, all together.” This time as they went through the moves he started to hum, until he got to the chorus and sang, “Hey you, hey you! Hey pick me!”

“Nooooooo!” she screamed and ran for the door. 

“Ei! Ei! Hey you! Hey you! Hey pick me! Ei! Ei!” he ran after her singing down the hallway. She ran into Zhengting’s room and slammed the door. “Come on, Qiao-Jie! Let me be your bias!” he begged as he banged on the door. 

She leaned against the door and felt his hits as she caught her breath. “Didis are evil,” she said to Wenjun and Zhengting.

“I tried to tell you,” Zhengting shrugged. 

A little while after Zeren finally left her alone she ventured out into the hallway again with her headphones and a notebook where she had scribbled a few lines while she was waiting for things to calm down. Zeren and Xinchun were playing video games again, but no one else seemed to be around. 

"Has Chengcheng come home yet?" she asked.

"I haven't seen him since he left with you this morning," Xinchun told her. 

"Oh. Then do you mind if I use the keyboard?" she asked nervously. 

"Help yourself." He never took his eyes off the screen, but he felt relieved that he had finally relented to Zhengting the day before and cleaned his room. Zeren on the other hand couldn't help himself from watching her walk cautiously to the side of the apartment she had not yet ventured into. He died. 

It was dark in the hallway, but one door was closed and another one open, so she opted to try the open door, feeling around for a light switch. When the lights came on she found success. The keyboard was in the corner far to the left of the door. She sat down on the bench, turned on the keyboard and plugged in her headphones. She only had the vague idea of a song at this point, but she was aching to do something about it. A song Zeren could dance to, although she thought he could probably dance to anything.

Chengcheng had been finding the apartment more and more claustrophobic recently, and was always coming up with reasons to be gone. After his meeting with the producer he spent a couple of hours in the gym to clear his head and when he got home he headed straight for the shower without saying hello to anyone. He took off his shirt and looked in the mirror. He was so tired of dieting. He hopped in the shower, extra hot, and let the water wash away the sweat and grime and stress, and tried really hard not to think about food. When he got out he rubbed a towel quickly over her hair before wrapping it around his waist and striding out of the bathroom leaving his clothes all over the floor. He walked into his room and straight ahead to his dresser without noticing Zhengqiao. With her headphones on and her focus on the music she didn't see or hear him enter either, but she could feel his presence. She looked over to see his glistening, wet back just before he dropped the towel to the floor. She was quick enough to turn her head away so that she only saw the top of his butt, but not graceful enough to make a smooth exit from the room. She tried to take evasive action, but she still had the headphones on and she got pulled back. She ripped them off her ears and abandoned them before running from the room with her eyes covered. Chengcheng screamed as she ran into the doorframe. 

"I didn't see anything!" She yelled over and over as she ran down the hallway, across the living room and into her room at the other end of the apartment. She slammed the door again and collapsed on the floor, facedown, slapping her hand against the carpet. She didn't know whether to laugh or cry but it didn't matter because she could barely breathe.  
She was horrified, amused, and thrilled all at the same time.

"What's going on?" Wenjun wondered, barely holding in laughter at the ridiculous state of her. But she couldn’t speak to explain. She just pointed in the direction of the scene and gasped for air like a fish out of water. Zhengting and Wenjun looked at each other briefly running out of the room to get the lowdown from the others.

The living room was in an uproar. No one with any real information was present to explain.

"She was in our room playing the keyboard," Xinchun told them.

"And then Cheng-ge came home, but that was a little while ago," Zeren said.

"Yeah, but he took a shower. Do you think…"

They all raised their hands up to their mouths as they gasped in unison. Justin, Wenjun and Zeren fell into a fit of laughter. Zhengting hit his best friend on the shoulder and ran back to his room. The others just stood with wide eyes and gaping mouths.

Chengcheng emerged, fully clothed, while most of them were still laughing. He threw his hands in the air in frustration before bringing them down on his head and scratching his fingers through his wet hair. "Is she-? Did she-?" He couldn't form any coherent thoughts. He'd made a fool of himself yet again. At this point he couldn't even tell if he liked her and was embarrassed or if he hated her and wanted her to leave. He let out a grunt of frustration.

In their room Zhengting crouched down and patted his sister's head. "Meimei, what happened?" He tried to keep his voice calm. "Are you okay?"

She rolled over on her back and took a deep breath before she explained everything to him.

"Did you see…"

"No!" She swore and pushed his shoulder so he rocked back onto his butt. "I only saw his back."

"Maybe this was a bad idea," he sighed.

"No. No. It will be fine. It's bound to be awkward at first. We just need to give it some time, and maybe some ground rules. It's really my fault for being in their room," she reasoned.

"Are you sure?"

"Are you kidding? I haven't this much fun in months." She got to her feet. "Years!" 

She walked into the living room where everyone was still gathered. They were calm now but all looked at her anticipation. 

She bowed. "Chengge, I'm really sorry for invading your space. I swear I didn't see anything." The others looked somewhat disappointed, but he was relieved. "From now on, I'm just going to avoid that area of the apartment entirely. Maybe we could move the keyboard into a neutral space, like the dance studio." She looked up at Chencheng but he didn't look at her. "On the other hand, if any of you feel uncomfortable with me being here, I will find other arrangements." She looked at them all apologetically. Zhengting, who was standing behind her, looked on anxiously. 

"No! Jiejie you can't leave!" Quanzhe ran to her side.

Everyone looked at Chengcheng, knowing his decision was the one that mattered. There was a part of him that really did want her to go. He felt ashamed and foolish with her around. Millions of girls thought he was cool, but here was the one actual girl he had talked to in months and he kept embarrassing himself. Still, nothing had been boring since she arrived and he knew everyone else wanted her to stay. 

He forced a smile. "We can move the keyboard into the dance room. You can stay."

Quanzhe clapped his hands excitedly. Wenjun gave Chengcheng a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. 

"You can look at me in the shower anytime," Justin told her with a wink.

"I think you should go," Zeren said seriously, bringing everyone's joy to a halt. They all stared at him, as they all thought he liked her the most. "She refuses to dance and if you live in this apartment you must dance!" He slapped his hands together emphatically. Quanzhe reached out his hand to smack Zeren on the back of the head. 

Zhengting hugged his sister from behind and they all went in for a group hug. Wenjun pushed Justin away, but pulled Chengcheng in, making him feel somewhat relieved.  
Afterward, everyone went back to their various quarters. Chengcheng picked up her headphones, notebook and pen Qiao had left in her wake. He read the lyrics over and smiled. He moved the keyboard into the dance studio like he'd said. On his way back across the apartment he stopped at the twins' room and knocked on the door, even though it was open. 

Qiao was laying on her bed, lost in thought as she stared at the ceiling. She jumped at the sound of his arrival and told him to come in.

"You left these," he told her as he handed over her belongings.

"Oh," she said looking down at the notebook. "I just started...it's not anything yet."

He just smiled reassuringly at her and exited the room, passing Zhengting on the way.

"Hi, mama," the oldest said, waving his phone at his sister.

"Hi, sweetie. Is your sister there?" Her voice carried from the speaker phone. 

"Hi, mama!" Qiao said, sitting up cross-legged on her bed as her brother came to sit with her.

"Qiao'er, are you settling in?" Their mom asked.

"Yes, mama. Sorry we haven't called. It's been busy already."

"I'm glad my babies are together. I hope you're both working hard."

"Yes, mama."

"Ting'er. You have to protect your sister. I'm worries about her living with all those boys."

The twins gave each other a wide-eyed look. "Yes, mama. Don't worry. I will take good care of her."

"They're on their best behavior," Qiao lied.

Their mom sighed. "Okay. I hope so. Make sure you eat well and sleep early. Be careful of your health."

"You too, mama. Love you." They both said and hung up.

Zhengting put his arm around her. "Are you sure you're okay?" 

She wrinkled her nose at him. "You stink. Go take a shower." She pushed him away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let the games begin!

That night they decided to order pizza and watch a scary movie. When the pizza got there all the other boys dug in right away, but Chengcheng was still in his room. Qiao snatched one of the pizza's from them and carried it over to the doorway leading to their half of the apartment, where she swore she would not enter. She called out his name in a high, sweet voice. He came out cautiously. 

"I got you a pizza," she told him, waving the box in front of him. 

His eyes lit up and he looked at it longingly. "If you give me a whole pizza, then I will eat the whole pizza," he sighed miserably. 

"Okay, then share it with me," she suggested with an inviting smile. He couldn't help but smile back and nodded his head. She led him to the couch and sat down. "I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to scare you, " she said quietly. 

"It's fine," he said. "It’s in the past." He was ready to move on, but he would still be looking around every corner before he entered a room. 

Soon the other guys came to join them and start the movie. Chengcheng and Qiao moved to one end of the couch while Bi Wenjun took the other end and Zhengting squeezed in between them. Quanzhe sat himself at his new big sister's feet while Xinchun and Zeren sat in chairs on either side of them. Justin went off to his room to be alone. At the scary parts Zhengting would always scream dramatically and seek shelter in Wenjun or Qiao. At one point Chengcheng looked down at her cradling her brother’s purple head and said, "I don't know why he always does this. He always requests a scary movie and then he's the most scared."

She laughed quietly. "He's always been like this."

"I can hear you," he whispered back. "It's like spicy food. You eat it because in burns." 

She smiled at him and patted his hair. When she looked back at Chengcheng she caught him staring at her, so she patted his head, too. He smiled innocently while Zeren could only watch jealously. 

"Alright everybody," Zhengting said, stretching, when the movie ended. "Get to bed early. We have a big day tomorrow."

"I don't think I can sleep now," said Quanzhe.

"You want me to tuck you in? Maybe have Justin sing you a song?" Qiao teased, patting head.

"That sounds nice." He smiled until he realized she was joking. "Hey, don't patronize me."

"I'm sorry little hamster. You can stay up with me a little while longer if you want."

They all started to move toward their rooms and Quanzhe hopped up to take Zhengting’s warm spot on the couch, cuddling into Qiao's side. That wasn't really what she meant, but she shrugged and put a blanket over him, finding him rather innocent, like a real little brother.

Zeren and Chengcheng shot him jealous looks from opposite sides of the living room as they walked to their bedrooms. Zeren wondered if she would treat him the same if he acted so boldly, while Chengcheng wondered if he had missed an opportunity earlier.

The boys had been lucky to have a few days off, but soon many of them would be returning to work on various projects. First though they had a photo shoot together. The debate between them was really starting to heat up throughout the shooting day. Even Xinchun, who couldn’t really care less who her bias was, was getting more involved, spurred on by the other boy’s fiery discussions.The only one of them who really didn’t care at all was Wenjun. They had decided the indecision on her part had gone on long enough and it was time for her to make a choice. In order to push her they would make it a competition like Idol Producer. 

“You can’t compete,” Justin told Zhengting as they worked out the details. 

“What?! Why not?” He pouted. 

“You’ve had her adoration for a lifetime, and you will never lose it. So there’s no competition. She’ll just end up picking you so she doesn’t have to make a decision between us.” He tapped his head, having a great idea. “Instead, you should be PD.”

Zhengting was about to protest, but then he thought about being in charge of the show and he liked the idea. “Deal!”

“I’m also taking myself out of the competition,” Wenjun said, to everyone’s surprise. 

“But you actually have a good chance of winning this time,” Chengcheng said, more cutting than he meant to.

Wenjun gave him a sharp look. “I have also experienced her love for a long time. I don’t need her to prove anything to me.” He shrugged and smiled. “I’ll be a mentor.”

“Fine. That just leaves the five of us. We should perform the theme song for her tonight and make her start thinking about it,” Quanzhe said. 

Everyone looked at Zeren. “You still remember it?” Chengcheng asked. 

“I do, but why should I help you?” He crossed his arms. 

“None of us can look good unless all of us look good, Zeren-ge.”

He thought about it for a second, but he could never pass up a chance to dance with his geges. He sighed. “Fine.”

When they got home that night Qiao was in the studio playing the keyboard with her headphones on and singing softly to herself a song that Zhengting did not recognize. He led his brothers inside and they took their positions without her noticing. Wenjun took the honor of taking off her head phones. 

She turned around quickly to see who had pulled her out of her world. She looked at Wenjun in confusion before she saw the other boys behind him. She nearly fell off the bench when she saw them standing in a formation, all of them wearing blazers. 

“Oh, god, no!” she cried helplessly. “Please, don’t.”

“Good evening, I'm PD Zhengting, and I am the unfortunate representative of the five boys before you. Producer Zhu Zhengqiao, the boys, well most of them,” he shot a dirty look at the assembled boys, “of NEXT have decided that you must choose one of them as your bias. Wenjun and I are out of the running, so you have to pick one of these five young men. Good luck.” 

“I really don’t want to do this,” she said quietly. 

Xinchun took a step forward and bowed. “Hello, my name is Huang Xinchun, AKA Minion. Please pick me as your bias because no one picks me as their bias.”

She covered her face with her hands.

“I’m Ding Zeren,” she peeked through her fingers. “You should pick me because I’m the best dancer. Hope you will become one of my DBabies.” He did a spin and winked at her. 

“Why are you doing this to me?” she wheezed. 

“My name is Fan Chengcheng and I hope you’ll pick me because I’m the sexiest and the most talented. You know you wanna be a Cheng Star, Baby.”

Qiao looked at her brother. “Why are you letting them do this?” He shrugged. 

Quanzhe stepped forward, bowed and waved happily. “Hi! I’m Li Quanzhe AKA little Hamster and I should be your bias because I’m your didi and I will never let you down! Jia you!” He made a heart with his hands and she couldn’t help but smile at him as he stepped back.

Justin was last. “Good evening. My name is Huang Minghao, AKA Justin. I may be the youngest in NEXT, but I am the most handsome. Hope you join me as a nana.” He gave her a sexy look and bit his lip.

“Is it over yet?” she asked, hugging her knees. 

“No,” Zhengting said and pointed to Wenjun. “Queue music.”

“Oh, god,” she sighed as “Ei, ei,” started loudly through the speakers. She stood up nervously as she watched them all dance the theme song from Idol Producer. She paced a little and scratched her temple as they each tried to give her alluring looks. When the song ended they all struck a pose and held it for a few seconds. She ran her fingers through her hair and grimaced. “I don’t want to pick!” she whined, and they all dropped their poses. 

“We can’t take it anymore,” Justin said, even though he was the one who really couldn’t stand it. He had always had the most stans of any individual in the group, and he wasn’t willing to let this one go. 

“Minghao,” she said, walking up to him and almost touching his face but pulling away. “I can’t choose. You’re all my friends. It’s too unfair.”

“The boys are willing to perform challenges to win your devotion,” Zhengting chimed in. 

“Oh, please no.” She crouched down and hugged her knees, burying her face again. Then she thought. “Wait. Can I pick the challenges?”

They all looked at each other for a moment. “Sure,” Chengcheng said for the group. 

She stood up and sighed. “Okay, boys. Give me a moment to confer with the mentors and we will be right back." She shooed the two oldest boys into their room to talk.  
“Are they really going to make me choose?” she asked after closing the door.

Zhengting nodded. “I don’t think they’ll let it go.”

“Why? I like all of them. We’re friends. They’re my didis. Do they really need one more stan to call their own?” 

“I think it’s mostly about the competition. And Minghao. Well, Minghao and Zeren. Everyone else just doesn’t want to lose,” Wenjun explained.

Qiao threw herself on her bed and lay there dejected. 

“Are you really upset about this?” Wenjun asked as he walked to her bed. She took his hand and pulled him to lay down next to her.

“I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.”

“Maybe it will help if you don’t think of them as people, but as idols,” he suggested. 

She couldn’t do that. “Why did you take yourself out of the competition anyway? You would have been my pick.” She held his hand and intertwined their fingers.

“Is that because I’m actually your bias or because I’m your best friend after your brother?”

“Pass,” she said, rolling her eyes. 

“I’m leaving in a few days. So, I didn’t want to get involved.”

“You’re leaving me with this mess?” She frowned. 

“Zhengting will help you.” Her brother nodded.

“You have to help me think of some challenges. I only agreed in order to buy myself some time. I have no idea what to make them do.”

“Dance battle?”

“Well, that’s an obvious option, but I have to get Justin out in the first round,” she clarified. 

“Why, exactly?” Zhengting wondered. 

“Minghao is too greedy and full of himself. And he’s the only one whose feelings I’m not afraid of hurting. He has enough stans. He can live without me.”

“That’s true,” Wenjun admitted. “Swimsuit contest?” He suggested. 

“I have always wondered about Zeren’s abs,” she admitted. “But that’s not a surefire way to get rid of Minghao.”

“You’ve wondered about Ren-ge’s abs?” He looked at her suggestively. 

She put her hand on his face. “Shut up.”

“Wenjun, get off my sister!” the other boys heard Zhengting yell from the room next door.

“No!” Wenjun yelled back for his brothers to hear. 

In a matter of seconds the other five came crashing through their door, pushing Zhengting out of the way to see what was happening in their room.

Zeren zeroed in on their clasped hands and both of them smiling happily. “Wenjun, how could you!” he cried. 

“I saw her first. She said I’m her bias. You guys are done for,” Wenjun teased. 

"Boys, are you ready to fight for the love of this woman?" Zhengting asked them.

"Yes!" They answered in unison. 

"For the first challenge, Producer Zhu Zhengqiao has chosen," pause for dramatic effect, "to let you be her teachers. You will choose a skill to teach her in ten minutes or less.”

“That’s right. I want my bias to have many skills, so it cannot be singing, rapping or dancing.” She looked pointedly at Zeren.

“You’re going to teach tomorrow night, so decide what your lesson is going to be. I will be available all day tomorrow if you need any help,” Wenjun told them.

Zeren walked over and grabbed his roommate’s other hand. “Come on, President. It’s time to sleep,” he instructed him, pulling him off the bed.

“Night, babe,” Wenjun said, leaning down to kiss her on the forehead. 

“Night, babe!” she called back as the tall boy was dragged out of the room. 

“I hate you, Wenjun,” she heard Zeren say outside the room. 

The twins giggled together as the others walked out.

Zeren pushed Wenjun into their room and closed the door. “What’s going on with you two?” the younger man demanded, making the older laugh. 

“Nothing, man.” He continued to laugh as Zeren pushed him onto his bed. 

“Do you like her?”

“Zhengqiao and I have always been good friends. I met her before all of you, even before I met Zhengting. But there are no romantic feelings between us,” he promised. Zeren looked relieved. “Do _you_ like her?” Wenjun’s eyes opened wide.

He blushed. “Of course, I like her! She’s prettier than Zhengting and nicer, too.”

“She asked about your abs,” Wenjun told him.

“What did you say?”

“That you didn’t have any.”

Zeren started to punch Wenjun in the arm and back. 

“I’m kidding! I’m kidding. Please stop! Ow!” His cries and giggles blended together. 

“Go to sleep, Wenjun,” Zeren ordered, hitting him in the head with a pillow and turning off the lights. He settled into his bed. “Wenjun, will you help me practice for my lesson tomorrow morning?” he said softly into the darkness.

“Of course, didi,” Wenjun, unable to help himself from smiling at his junior’s crush. 

The next day Chengcheng and Zhengting both went to the Yuehua studios to work on solo songs, while Xinchun and Justin went to film some bits for a variety show. Quanzhe was doing a photo shoot to promote a makeup line.

In the evening, they all gathered back in the dance studio for their competition.

“Okay, boys. It’s time for you to present your lessons to Producer Zhu Zhengqiao. Hope you can impress her with your skills!” Zhengting announced into an invisible microphone. “Remember, you have ten minutes or less. In the end, she will rank you based on how well you taught the lesson and how useful she thinks your skill is. The one who ranks 5th will be eliminated. Quanzhe has chosen to go first.” He made a gesture for Quanzhe to take center stage.

The young man skipped over to the mirrored wall and motioned for Qiao to join him. “Tonight, I’m going to teach you how to do your makeup,” he told her, holding up a makeup set he had received from shooting the promotion. 

She looked down at the items in his hands and then up at his face, still done up from the photo shoot. “You think I need makeup?” she asked, pretending to be offended. 

“No, no, no!” he replied awkwardly. “I just think dage has failed to teach you his skills, so I’m going to teach you mine. Of course, jiejie doesn’t need makeup. You’re so pretty. Guys isn’t she pretty?” he framed her face and looked over at the others, they all cheered. “This is just gonna make you like, wow!” he laughed nervously. It was true that Zhengting had more experience with makeup than she did.

“Okay!” she smiled and let him begin. 

“Okay, we’re just gonna do your eyes.” He explained each step as he went along. 

“Not bad! I look good!” she said into the mirror when he’d finished before turning around to show the others. “Thank you, Quanzhe!” She gave him a hug and he went to sit down with the others. 

“Minghao, you’re up,” Zhengting told him. 

She walked to meet him in the middle of the room. “What are you going to teach me?” she asked.

“I’m going to teach you how to flirt,” he smiled proudly. 

“You think I don’t know how to flirt?” she mocked defensively again. 

“No. If you knew how to flirt you wouldn’t still be single at your age,” he told her. 

The boys went wild. Zhengting and Wenjun slapped their knees and laughed uncontrollably. 

“Fine. Let’s see what it looks like when babies flirt,” she responded. 

“First, you have to work on your visuals. Good thing you have makeup on, that will help. Let’s go to the mirror. First you kind of squint your eyes like this.” He looked intensely at himself in the mirror. “No, not like that. That’s too angry. Pout a little.” All the boys got up to try to see around them in the mirror. “Okay, now bite your lip.” She couldn’t do it without laughing. “You’re trying to be sexy, not eat your own face,” he told her. She finally got it. “Okay, not bad. Now, wink.” They winked at themselves in the mirror. “Okay, moving onto the next step, body language. If you want to flirt you can touch your own face like is,” he gently touched his own face with his fingertips. “Or if you really really want to flirt, you can put your hand on his arm. If you’re very bold you can just,” he tucked her hair behind her ear. She smacked his hand away and jumped back laughing, making the others laugh again too. 

“Minghao! You’re too much!” she yelled at him. 

“Okay, okay, moving on. Look in the mirror and flirt with your face.” She calmed down and stood beside him again, trying to make a sexy face in the mirror. “Now say, ‘you’re so handsome.’”

She suppressed a giggle. “You’re so handsome,” she said in a low voice. “Good, good. You’re coming along. Now, look at me, and try to do all the things that I told you.”

She took a deep breath and tried to shake out all the giggles and awkwardness. She exhaled and turned toward him, trying to make a sexy face. She touched his arm and said, “You’re so handsome.”

He grabbed on to her hand and smiling at her, said, “Thank you.”

“Oh my god, I can’t believe I fell for that!” She pulled her hand away and used it to hit him. The others laughed and berated him for his vanity. 

Justin took a bow and went to sit with the others. 

“Okay, next we have Chengcheng,” Zhengting announced. 

Chengcheng got up and moved toward the door. “For my skill, we need to go to the kitchen,” he said and led them out of the room. 

“Your skill would involve food,” Zhengting said from behind him. 

When they got to the kitchen the others gathered to one side as Wenjun helped Chengcheng pull out the ingredients. 

“What are we making?” she wondered. 

“We are going to make a strawberry banana smoothie,” he told her with a smile. 

“That sounds delicious,” she said, and his smile grew wider. 

“I’m pretty sure I had more strawberries,” he said, looking at his brothers. Zhengting hid his face behind Justin. “Ah, that’s okay. We’ll make it work. Okay, this is pretty simple. All you need is a blender. Some strawberries, bananas, yogurt, and ice,” he talked while he poured all the ingredients into the blender. “We’re also going to put in a little soy milk. Make sure the lid is on tight and then blend until it’s smooth.” He smiled at her as he pushed the button. When it was blended he poured it into a glass and stuck in two straws, then he presented it to her. “Voila.”

She smiled and looked up at him through her masquera’d eyelashes. Slowly they both leaned in and took a sip. Wenjun and Xinchun “oooo’ed.”

“Cheng-ge, can we have a try?” Justin asked. 

“No,” said Qiao. 

“Here, for you,” Chengcheng handed her the glass after taking another sip. She thanked him.

“Now, that’s what I call flirting,” Zhengting teased, giving Justin a small shove. Zeren looked mad, but no one noticed. “Okay! Back to the studio for Xinchun’s lesson!”

“As an idol, it’s important to take great selfies to gain lots of followers on all your networks, so I’m going to teach you how to take cute selfies. Come here,” Xinchun told her when they got back to the studio. 

“Great, another person who thinks I need help looking cute,” she said sarcastically, handing her drink back to its maker. When Chengcheng wasn’t looking, Quanzhe snuck a sip.

“There’s a difference between being cute and taking cute selfies,” Xinchun said, brushing under her chin with his finger. “I even had to help Wenjun-ge when he first started. The key to great selfies is all in the hand gestures and the camera angle. You can’t have a low camera angle, or it will make you have a fat head like Cheng-ge and lil hamster.” They gave him dirty looks. “I like to hold the camera a little above my head like this.” He pulled out his phone to demonstrate. “Then are the hand gestures. There’s lots of good ones. You’ve got your peace sign.” He held up his two fingers. “You can do it in front of you, or to be really cute and can hold them up to your face.” She and several of the boys imitated him. “Okay, then there are lots of ways to do hearts. You’ve got your two finger hearts with your index finger and your thumb. You have these finger hearts. You can do a heart over your head. And if you’re with someone else, you can do a heart together.” He held up his hand and she completed his heart. “Okay, let’s take a selfie together.” He wrapped his arm around her to be able to get a good angle of their heart hands and snapped the picture. “Awesome. Now I can put this on Weibo and everyone will think I have a girlfriend.” 

She dropped her hands to her side and made a face. “You’re taking advantage of me! Gege!” she whined to Zhengting, who just laughed. 

“Okay, last but not least, Ding! Ze! Ren!” He emphasized each syllable. 

Zeren smiled happily and ran up to her side. “Qiao-jie. Allow me to apologize for my geges’ behavior. They have given you a hard time tonight, and will continue to give you a hard time as long as they are alive. So, I’m going to teach you some tai chi moves that you can do to help you relax when they are just too much.”

Her mouth formed into an “O” and then a smile of excitement. “I’ve been wanting to learn tai chi since I saw your show with Wenjun-ge! This is awesome!”

He turned her so that they were facing each other. “Okay, tai chi is all about breathing. With each movement you either breathe in or out, and you have to breathe deep. Another thing to remember is to keep your stance wide for your balance. First position, we step wide, and breathe in when we come up, and breathe out as we sink down.” She copied the movements he did with his hands. “Up and down. In and out.” He spoke slowly and softly while looking her in the eyes. Their breathing was perfectly in sync. After a few repetitions he said, “Next, raise your arms up and breathe in, and down, breathe out.”

“This feels so nice,” she smiled at him and he smiled back.

“Third position.” He made a graceful sweeping position to the left and she copied. “Draw your breath in, and push it out. Then to the other side, draw it in, and push it out.”

“How am I doing, Jun-ge?” she asked when she turned toward the group. 

“You look great, jiejie,” he smiled.

After showing her several more breathing moves he showed her how to put more force behind them to make them fighting moves. He made sure to use up every minute of his time and was the only one that Zhengting, who hadn’t even been keeping time at all, had to stop. 

“Okay, that concludes the talent portion of our show,” Zhengting smiled. “We will now go deliberate with Producer Qiao and we’ll be back in a few minutes.”

She took her drink back from Chengcheng as she walked by, even though it was almost gone now.

“Hey! You can’t help her decide!” Minghao screamed as they walked out of the dance studio and into their room. 

“Well, that worked out better than expected,” she said to Wenjun. 

“What do you mean?” Zhengting asked.

“Well, I wanted to knock Minghao out of the running, and he definitely was the worst.”

“Who was the best?” Wenjun asked.

She walked over to the mirror to look at herself. “Hmmm.”

“You’re toast,” Chengcheng told Justin back in the dance room. 

“Why?”

“You’re too full of yourself. You basically called her old, and instead of flirting with her, you made her flirt with you, idiot,” Zeren explained. 

“It’s better than making her breathe for ten minutes,” Justin grumbled. 

“Actually, I think that worked out pretty well,” Zeren congratulated himself. 

“I still say the way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach,” Chengcheng told them. 

“That’s only the way to your heart,” Xinchun said. 

The three elders walked back in and the twins went to the center of the room. 

“Ranking time, babies,” Zhengting told them. “Producer Qiao, will you please call up your choice for number 4.”

They all groaned at his PD Zhang impression. 

Qiao cleared her throat and looked at them all lined up. “My choice for number 4 is,” she paused, dragging out their agony. “Lil Hamster, Li Quanzhe!”

He clapped his hands and ran up beside her, happy not to be eliminated. She gave him a hug and then looked back at the others. 

“In third place is...Huang Xinchun, AKA Minion!” Everyone clapped for him as he walked up to receive his hug and stand beside Quanzhe.

“Qiao, who is currently in the lead for your bias after tonight’s competition?” Zhengting asked.

“What kind of order is this?” Justin complained. 

“The one who I learned the most from tonight, and is therefore my lead bias, was,” she took a deep breath and looked carefully at the three young men. “Master Ding Zeren.” 

Zeren’s face stretched with a look of surprise. He ran up to her and threw his arms around her, bouncing at the same time. 

“Producer Qiao, who will be eliminated from the competition tonight?” 

“The one who impressed me the least tonight was Minghao,” she said with no suspense at all. 

“Congratulations, Cheng-ge you’re in second place,” Zhengting told him and clapped. 

“What? Jiejie!” Justin screamed. “This is not right!” 

She went up to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Minghao-di,” she batted her eyelashes at him. “We just weren’t meant to be.” He threw his hands in the air and turned away, pouting. She turned back toward the other boys, standing in a line from first to fourth. 

“One, two, three,” Zeren said and they all bowed and said. “Thank you for picking us.”

She bowed back and the whole scene quickly fell apart. Chengcheng finally received his hug and she thanked him again. Then, she and Zeren locked eyes and each took a fighting stance. The eight of them spent the next couple of hours taking and perfecting various selfies and posting them on Weibo. Wenjun, Zeren and Qiao choreographed a fight scene to post on Douyin with the caption "Qiao-jie has joined the Tai Chi Faculty."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of the guys seek advice from Zhengqiao.

Qiao woke up early the morning after the skills competition in order to make Minghao an apology breakfast before he left for filming. She had really wanted him out of the contest, but she still wanted him to know that she liked him as a friend and to ensure there were no hard feelings. She was in a good mood and danced around the kitchen while she worked and listened to music on her Bluetooth headphones. She wasn't aware of her surroundings when Zeren arrived, partially hidden behind the wall to watch her dance. Wenjun and Zhengting joined him a moment later and leaned their heads over his to see what he was looking at so suspiciously. Zhengting suppressed his laughter and snuck in behind her to grab her phone off the counter. He skipped back behind the wall and switched the Bluetooth from her headphones to the living room speakers. Shakira filled the apartment. 

Qiao stopped abruptly as the music cut out of her ears and turned around to see all three of them looking at her in amazement. 

"Don't stop!" Zeren yelled. He grabbed her hand and started to dance with her. She was in a good enough mood that she danced with him until the bacon started to pop and her attention was pulled back to the stove.

"Since when do you like Latin music?" Zhengting asked her, turning the volume down a little. 

She shrugged. "Since college."

"That's...unexpected."

"Music only needs one of two things to be good, either it connects with you emotionally or it makes you want to dance. Nothing else is really important," she told him.

Just then Justin came out of his room, rubbing his eyes. "Where the hell am I?" 

Qiao slid some eggs and bacon onto a plate. "Minghao, come sit," she said, leading him to a chair and putting a plate in front of him. "You want some coffee?" He nodded his head and she hurried to get him a cup.

"Where's mine?" Wenjun grinned. She hit him in the stomach.

"Here you go," she said cheerfully.

"What are you doing?" He asked suspiciously. 

"I just want to make sure there are no hard feelings. So, still friends?" She smiled.

"Sure," he said cooly and began eating. "Actually it works out fine, since I'm leaving tomorrow to work on a show anyway. I don't have time for your games."

She rolled her eyes and went back to the kitchen. She made sure everyone was fed and then went back to her room.

After several of the others had gone off to work on various things, Qiao was reading on her bed when Wenjun came to lean in her doorway. He looked as though something was weighing on him, so she put her book down and motioned for him to come over. He closed the door and sat beside her, both leaning their backs against the wall.

"I leave tomorrow," he informed her.

“How long will you be gone?” 

“A month, probably, for filming. I’ll be back for our performance next month.” His voice betrayed his mixed emotions. 

“You really like acting, don’t you?” she smiled at him. 

“I do. I didn’t think I would, but it’s fun and exciting.” He couldn’t hide his own smile. 

“You want to leave performing. don’t you?”

“It’s complicated,” he sighed. 

“You can talk to me about it,” she said softly, sensing that he needed a confidant. 

He sighed again, this time with his whole body. “I love music. I don’t have to tell you that. But I’ve never liked performing as much as the other guys. Everytime I see Zeren coming toward me to tell me to dance, my head starts to hurt. I think I’m actually really good at acting, and I enjoy it a lot. It’s just…” He turned his head to look at her. “You really look a lot like your brother.”

“Or does he look like me?” she asked, and he forced a laugh. She took his hand in hers. “Jun-ge, You can’t live for someone else’s dream. You always try to go with the flow and let others lead, but this is your life. You have to follow your dream. You don’t have to stay on a course that makes you unhappy just because it’s the one that you’re on.”

“I know you’re right. I don’t want to let him down.”

“You won’t. Ting’er is a talented man. He will always find some way to shine. You don’t give that to him. It’s better that you support both of you in your dreams.” He nodded and tried to absorb her words. “But I still want to write a song together before you give this up.”

“I don’t know if I will give it up.” He squeezed her hand. "I still love singing and performing with them can be nice, when we get to do it. Maybe if you write us some great new songs it will be fun again."

"No pressure," she sighed. 

"No, no pressure. But I know you will succeed." He smiled gently at her.

Later on she was laying in bed daydreaming about what it would be like to see the seven of them on stage performing songs she wrote when there was a knock on the door. She was surprised to see Chengcheng's face through the crack in the door. 

"You can come in," she said as she got up. "What's up?"

He scratched his head, hesitant to speak. "I'm struggling with this rap. Something just isn't right and I was wondering if you could take a listen. I saw your lyrics the other day and they were good. I thought maybe you could help, if you don't mind."

She was shocked and honored.

"Sure, I'd be happy to help, if I can," she smiled kindly at him. She sat back down on her bed.

He cleared his throat and began. She listened attentively with her eyes closed. The beat was good but the difficulty was obvious to her when he reached it. 

"Can I see the lyrics?" She asked when he finished. He handed over the paper wordlessly. She read it over and found the line that stood out to her. "This is the problem." She read the line back to him.

"I feel that, too," he admitted. 

"It isn't what you want to say. It doesn't match the feeling of the other lines around it. I feel like it's hiding something." She looked up at him but he looked away. She thought for a second and then grabbed a pencil from the desk. She scribbled a new line in the margin and handed it back to him. 

He tried it out and smiled at her. "You fixed it."

She shrugged. "As long as you're happy."

"Thank you, Qiao-jie." Unexpectedly, he put his arm around her in a side hug. Then suddenly feeling awkward he cleared his throat and backed away toward the door.

"Anytime," she said quietly, and he left.

That night they all gathered together in the studio once more. 

"The next round will be decided by dance battle," PD Zhengting announced. "You will be separated into two battles. The loser of each battle will be out of the competition. The two remaining idols will move onto the last stage, which will be to write and perform a new song with Producer Zhu Zhengqiao." Everyone "awed". Zeren smiled, knowing he would be on top in this challenge.

"Wait, isn't that your job anyway?" Justin asked. She shushed him. 

"Battles will be chosen by a drawing." Zhengting held up a hat. "Ding Zeren, since you're in first place you get to draw for your opponent. The other two will face each other."

Zeren stepped up, feeling confident that it didn't matter whose name was drawn. He picked one of the folded pieces of paper. He looked at the paper and then the other three contestants dramatically. Then he lifted it up to show them. "Li Quanzhe."

Quanzhe's face fell. He was finished. If he had gone against one of the other two he stood a chance, but no one could beat Zeren.

"Okay that means Chengcheng will battle Xinchun. You guys are up first. Everyone please make some room." The other two came to take their spots while the spectators moved to the sides. "DJ," Zhengting looked at Wenjun, "drop the beat."

Xinchun was a competent dancer, but Chengcheng’s confidence and build made him a more powerful performer. He had the edge, and he came out on top.

Although Quanzhe was also a great dancer, there was just no beating Zeren. He tried his best anyway. When it was over Qiao pulled him in for a tight hug. "You're still my best little brother," she told him quietly, and he didn't feel too sad as he hugged her back. 

"Zeren and Chengcheng will get to work on a song with Zhengqiao. We are all going to be going our separate ways for a few weeks, so this will give you some time to work, and when we come back together you can show us what you've got." Everyone clapped and then went their own ways.

In the morning Qiao woke up feeling tense. The anxiety of writing two new songs with Zeren and Chengcheng was creeping up on her, so she decided to go into the dance studio to practice the tai chi moves she had learned the other night. Just when she was starting to feel relaxed Zeren came in. His face lit up when he saw her practicing his lessons and he walked to her side to practice with her.

"Good morning, shifu," she said quietly. "How am I doing?"

"Really great," he beamed at her, full of joy that she had learned from him.

"I'm a good student, aren't I?"

"Very good," he assured her.

Several minutes later Wenjun entered, grinning at the pair of them. 

"Are you going to join us?" She asked to the mirror.

He shook his head. "I wish I could. I'm leaving for the airport. I just came to say goodbye."

Qiao stopped abruptly and her face fell into a frown. She went over to give him a hug, wrapping her arms around his thin waist. "I can't believe you're leaving," she said against his chest.

"I'll be back before you know it. And you can always text me like we used to," he said as he hugged her back.

"Make sure you take care of yourself. Okay?" She said, playing the motherly figure.

He nodded. "You two behave yourselves," he said looking at Zeren, who pointed at himself and made a face as if to say 'me?' Wenjun made another pointed look between the two of them when Qiao couldn't see, and then smiled and left with a wave. "Bye bye."

Qiao didn't feel like practicing anymore and instead followed Wenjun out to the living room where he gave Zhengting a hug and then exited the apartment with his bags after Justin. She went to her brother's side and wrapped her arms around his waist while he draped an arm over her shoulders. 

"I miss him already," she moaned softly. 

"Me, too," he sighed wistfully. "It’s never the same when he's gone."

"Do you get to stay home and play with me today?" 

"Sorry, I'm going back to the studio today." She groaned. "Why don't you start working on your song with Zeren," he suggested. 

"Mmmmm, or I could do something else…" she thought out loud, feeling like procrastinating. 

"Everyone who isn't working somewhere else today has dance practice in thirty minutes," Zeren announced loudly. 

Qiao went around him to escape to her room.

"Qiao-jie, that includes you, too," he said authoritatively. 

"But, I-"

"I'll have no more arguments from you. You can dance and you're coming."

"But, I-"

"See you in thirty," he smiled and went to his room to change.

She gave Zhengting a bewildered look. He shrugged. "Once he goes into dance captain mode there's nothing you can do. Even Chengcheng can't argue with him."

Zhengting left soon after and it was just Zeren, Chengcheng, Quanzhe and Qiao in the studio. “We’ll start with Blah, Blah, Blah and then WYTB, and then just for fun I’ll teach you the new dance I just choreographed,” Zeren told them, commanding the room. “Qiao, you can follow along.”

Her eyes widen in a terrified expression, making Chengcheng laugh. “Just follow me,” he told her. 

They danced until Qiao begged for mercy and they all took a break, sitting in a circle on the dance floor. She spread out on the floor as she tried to catch her breath.  
“You’re a good dancer, Qiao. You can also sing. Why didn’t you want to be an idol?” Zeren asked, handing her a bottle of water. 

“You need a lot of other things to be an idol besides talent. Like stamina and diligence. Of which I have neither.” Her heart was still racing. 

“I feel like we don’t know very much about you,” Chengcheng said, flipping his water bottle in the air, trying to get it to land on it’s top. 

She sat herself up with great effort. “I spent most of my life with Zhengting. What else do you want to know?”

“How come you knew Wenjun so well?” Quanzhe wondered. Zeren was glad he was the one to ask the question because it had been burning in his mind, but he was too shy to ask his roommate directly. 

She smiled. “I met Wenjun on his first day at the conservatory. I helped him get to his first class. We had an instant connection, you know? And we got really close. I was really sad when he signed his contract and left but really happy when he told me he met Zhengting as a trainee.”

“Did you guys date?” Chengcheng asked. She shook her head. “Why not?”

She sighed a little. “I had a boyfriend. Wenjun and I were always just friends, and I don’t think it was on his mind.”

“Do you have a boyfriend now?” Chengcheng asked abruptly, not really thinking it through. Zeren stared at him intensely, trying to guess at his motives. 

“No. Do you think if I had a boyfriend he would be okay with me living with seven guys?” she laughed. 

“Have you ever fallen in love,” Quanzhe asked, his eyes twinkling innocently. 

“A dozen times,” she chuckled. They all stared at her blankly. “Falling in love is so easy to do. It’s letting go and letting your imagination run away with itself. Actually being in love is a different story. The first time I fell in love I was five. His name was Xuanjun. He didn’t love me back though ” She looked at each of them, thinking how young they all were and how many youthful experiences they were robbed of being trapped in the idol world. “Ah, nevermind. You wouldn’t understand. You’re all still babies, and you’ve never met any women.”

They all looked off in different directions, feeling embarrassed.

“Hey! I had a girlfriend before I was a trainee,” Quanzhe defended himself. Qiao patted his poofy hair. “Do you and Zhengting have psychic powers?” Quanzhe asked suddenly. 

She laughed again. “We usually know how the other is feeling and thinking, but it’s not exactly like that.”

“What was he like as a little kid?”

“Pretty much the same as he is now. Over the top and full of love...and a little hyper. Sometimes I think we share one energy source and he usually uses all of it.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s so active all the time, and I’m so lazy,” she laid back down dramatically. “Our mom put us into all kinds of music and sports classes when we were kids. I did well in all kinds of instruments, but all Zhengting ever wanted to do was dance and gymnastics. Who has that kind of energy?” She was tired just thinking about it. 

“All I ever wanted to do was dance,” Zeren admitted. “But I was also an active child.”

“I didn’t dance until I became a trainee,” Chengcheng said. 

“Me neither,” agreed Quanzhe.

“Well, that explains why you’re all so bad at it,” Zeren said, kicking their feet. 

“Ugh!” she grunted as she forced herself up again. "Any other burning questions?"

Chengcheng looked her over. "Do you have any tattoos?"

"Mmm. One," she admitted.

"Where is it?" He wondered.

"On my back." She twisted her arm to touch the spot.

"Can we see it?" Zeren asked.

"No!"

"Why not?" 

She looked away from them and blushed. "It’s not appropriate."

"What is it?"

She looked briefly into Zeren's eyes. “Who’s hungry?” she asked, abruptly changing the subject. 

“Me!” they all raised their hands. 

“You guys go clean up, and I will fix us something delicious!” she declared as she hopped up to her feet. “That’s another reason I couldn’t be an idol. I love food too much.”

“I feel that in my soul,” Chengcheng said as he followed her out of the studio.

She made a skillet of fried rice and divided it into four bowls. They all sat around the coffee table in the living room and ate quietly. 

“Qiao-jie, maybe after lunch we can get started on our song,” Chengcheng suggested. 

She groaned. “I’m eating. Why do you have to ruin the mood with this talk of work?”

“Wasn’t it your idea for us to write a song together?”

“Actually it was Ting’s idea, and I only went along with it because it’s my job anyway.” She sighed into her bowl.

“So you don’t want to write songs with us?” Zeren asked, confused. 

“No, it’s not that. I do! I’m really happy to get the chance. I just...I get really stressed out from the pressure. I don’t like to force it. And today feels very much like a day for not doing it.” She nodded, sure of her intuition. 

“Well, I’ve already got some ideas, so maybe that will take the pressure off,” Chengcheng urged. “And then you can procrastinate on your song with Ze.”

She looked between the two of them and gave a resigned sigh. “Okay, after lunch, IF you do the dishes.” He smiled at her and nodded. She finished her meal very slowly. 

She went back to the dance studio to fiddle around on the keyboard while she waited for Chengcheng. She didn’t play anything seriously, just a bit of a song here and another one there, some she wrote herself and some that were popular. 

“How long have you been playing?” he asked as he sat beside her on the small bench. 

“Since I was about ten, I guess. You?”

“Since I was four,” he said, and she gave him an expression to let him know she was impressed. 

“Let’s see what you’ve got,” she said and scooted over a little to give him some room to play. 

He played a sad little melody and then showed her a few lines he had written.

“Are all your songs sad?” she asked, remembering the rap he had shown her the other day. 

“I don’t think they’re all sad, but those are the easiest ones for me to write,” he admitted. 

“That’s okay. But...have you ever been in love?” she asked, looking up at him curiously. 

“Well, I’m not sure if I’d call it love. But I did have my heart broken once in high school, if that counts for anything,” he answered shyly, intimidated by what he supposed was her active and well-populated love life. 

“It all counts, Chengcheng, even the stuff that only exists in your head. I was only asking to know where you were coming from,” she explained. "So where does this come from?" she asked, pointing to the words on the page. 

"It's about the fear that something that seems great in your head may not be that great," he told her.

"So it's about the illusion of love?" He nodded. "Great. I'm an expert in that," she smiled ironically. "Can you play the melody for me again?"

He played it and she picked up where he left off, adding a few lyrics, which he wrote down. They went on slowly and had about half a song before they ran out of creative juice and left it there for the day. 

When Zhengting came home Qiao was laying on her bed, daydreaming again about her college days and how upset she was when Zhengting signed his contract without telling anyone. She was relatively happy about the outcome, now. She didn't notice him enter until he plopped down on her bed, bouncing her out of her head.

"Hey!" He smiled ecstatically. 

"Hey," she replied more calmly.

"I have some good news and some bad news."

"Give me the bad news first."

"Well, it's actually the same news, I just don't think you're going to like it," he frowned, looking away from her.

"Okay?"

"Wang Yibo had to drop out of a guest appearance on a show and they asked me to fill in!" His smile returned.

"That's great. What's the bad part?" She wondered.

"I have to go away for two weeks and I leave tomorrow with Xinchun."

"Gege!" she groaned and drummed her fists on his leg. "First Wenjun and now you! You're leaving me alone with all these boys?"

"I know! I'm sorry! But I can't say no. Don't tell mom!"

"Why would I tell mom? You don't tell mom!" She pictured her mom flying to Beijing and dragging her from the apartment. 

"I'm much better at keeping secrets from mom," he argued. 

"You've never kept a secret in your life," she punched him. "Like all my boyfriends, or our first dog." She pointed an accusing finger at him.

"How was I supposed to keep a dog a secret? Especially when he was so cute!" He started to laugh and scream as she tickled his sides. "Stop!"

She pulled her hands away and sighed. "We just got back together and you're leaving," she said miserably. 

"It's only a couple of weeks. I'm sure it'll pass like that. If you work hard and write some great songs maybe we can stay together forever," he told her dreamily.

"Maybe if you don't work hard we can go start a new life as ordinary people," she looked at him with a goofy smile. He shook his head. "Fine. We'll do it your way," she grumbled. 

"Come on. Let's go out for dinner. It's on me." Zhengting was actually quite happy to be leaving. He noticed Wenjun's absence less when he wasn't at home himself and he was pretty thrilled about being able to replace Yibo. He only felt bad worrying about leaving his sister alone, but she was a big girl.


	5. Chapter 5

"Have you seen this?" Quanzhe asked the older boys when he found Chengcheng, Zeren and Zhengting sitting in the living room sipping coffee in the morning. He looked around. "Is Qiao-jie up yet?" 

"Not yet. What's up?" Zhengting set down his cup and leaned forward.

"Someone posted pictures of us from last night." Quanzhe handed the oldest boy his phone. "They don't have very nice things to say about her," he said in a low voice.

"What?" Zeren sat up, his brow furrowed as he leaned close to the other boy to see the screen. There were nasty comments, mostly mocking her appearance, although a few were nice. Zeren felt himself getting angry and defensive. "Who do these people think they are?"

"They're our fans," Zhengting replied, putting a calming hand on Zeren's leg as he handed the phone back to Quanzhe.

"And you don't care if they talk about her like that?" Zeren's tone was getting angrier and louder.

Zhengting put his finger to his lips and shushed the younger man while glancing back toward their rooms. "Of course I care. She's my sister. But they are our fans, and being obsessed with us is what they do. It’s natural for them to get a little territorial. We should be more careful. As her brother I'm supposed to protect her. So do me a favor and don't talk to her about this. She doesn't take pressure or criticism very well. Luckily she doesn't get on social media very much, so there's a good chance she won't know about it if no one says anything." They all agreed.

"Promise me that if anything like this comes up while I'm gone you won't tell her. And just don't go out anywhere with her, just to be safe," Zhengting begged, starting to feel a little worried and regretful about leaving. 

"Don't worry, dage," Chengcheng said. "We will take good care of her."

"We won't let anything bad happen to her," Zeren assured him.

Qiao sauntered sleepily into the room, still in her pajamas with sleep in her eyes. "What are you guys talking about so hushed in here?"

"Um, dage was just asking us to look out for you while he's gone," Chengcheng explained.

"You guys? Look out for me?" She scoffed. "You realize I'm the big sister here. It's me looking out for you. Make sure you don't burn the place down," she mumbled as she went to the kitchen for coffee. They all gave each other final confirming looks to close their conversation. All eyes returned to Qiao as she came back from the kitchen. "What are you staring at me for?"

"You're just so pretty," Zeren said. He meant it honestly but it came out awkward. Zhengting hit him on the back of the head. "What?! She is. Way prettier than you," he grumbled. 

"We are twins."

"Yeah but you're fraternal twins. You're taller. She's prettier."

"You-"

"Hey, let the man speak," Qiao said, sitting down very close to Zeren on the couch. "Go on," she smiled at him.

"I...uh...you're," he stammered and laughed awkwardly and went silent, causing Chengcheng and Quanzhe to laugh. “I gotta go to my room.” The other boys were in stitches. 

“Aw, Ren-ge. I’m sorry! Come back!” she cried as he ran off shyly. “I didn’t mean to tease him that badly.”

“He’ll be fine,” Zhengting assured her. 

Xinchun came out with his suitcase and looked at the older boy. 

"You ready?"

Zhengting nodded and kissed his sister on the cheek. "Take care of these boys while I'm gone. I'll be back in a couple of weeks."

She got up and gave him a hug. "I've got it under control," she promised. She walked them to the door and locked it behind them, sighing heavily. She really felt for the first time that she was in a strange place. She could understand keenly what the execs meant about the group being scattered, but she couldn't help but feel it was their fault to begin with.

"What's going on today?" She asked, turning to the others.

"Zeren and I both have photo shoots today," Quanzhe told her.

"I have nothing. So we can finish our song," smiled Chengcheng.

She nodded a bit sadly. "I’ll go get dressed." She put on jeans and one of Zhengting’s sweatshirts and forced herself to go to Chengcheng in the studio even though she was in no mood for song writing. 

“I wrote this rap last night for the bridge,” he said, immediately handing her a paper as soon as she walked in. She took it and looked at it grumpily. She pretended to read it again while she searched for the right words to express why she didn’t like it. 

“What is it?” he finally asked impatiently.

“Well, the song is about the illusion of a crush. The time when you don’t know if you will or you won’t or if it’s even possible. This is the best time. The angst is high, but all the possibilities are there. It’s Schrodinger's relationship. Inside the box is either heartbreak or the weight of love. You just opened the box. Does that make sense?”

“We shouldn’t open the box?” he wondered, tilting his head to the side. 

“Not in this song. Keep the angst and the hope. It’s more romantic when it’s still just a thought of love. Don’t you think?” She hoped she wasn’t being too harsh, but she felt like it was coming out wrong. 

“Yeah, I see your point. Any ideas?” He took the paper back from her.

She shook her head and went to the keyboard. She played the melody they had worked out before trying out something for the bridge. She looked up at him when she was done. 

“That’s good. I like it. I’ll rework the lyrics.” He sat down on the floor and leaned against the wall, thinking about what she had said. She played the part a few more times, refining a few things, before lazily hitting some random keys and then stopping altogether. She went to sit near him on the floor and sank into the hood of Zhengting’s sweatshirt. 

“It’s nice that you’re really close with your brother,” Chengcheng said a few minutes later, too weighed down by her obvious depression to go on without her. 

She peeked out at him from behind the hood. “It’s hard not to be close when you start life side by side. But he’s still my best friend, and we’ve always been there for each other emotionally, if not physically.”

“Then what’s bothering you so much right now?” Chengcheng wondered.

“It’s true I got used to not seeing him. It’s really been years since we were together for more than a day. But I was just getting used to having him around. And Wenjun, too. There’s like a weird bond between the three of us. I didn’t realize how nice it would be for us all to live together. I didn’t know I would miss them when they were gone,” she frowned. 

“Don’t worry. They’ll be back,” he promised, putting his hand on top of her head in a move that was meant to be comforting. “Everyone always comes back. We just go through these periods where we get all over the place. It’s worse now that we can’t perform. But once all this pandemic stuff clears up and we have a new album I’m sure we will all be together a lot more.”

She groaned and hung her head. 

“What?”

“I just feel like everyone is expecting me to write this album and make everything better, and I don’t know if I can,” she admitted. 

“I’m sorry if we’re pressuring you. But you are really doing a great job so far. You’ve only been here like a week and we almost have a whole song,” he smiled. 

She squished her face between her hands and pouted. He couldn’t help laughing at her expression and his laughter helped to diffuse her tension. “Let me see that,” she said, asking for his pen and paper. She wrote down a few lines and slid it back to him across the floor. 

“Ah,” he said appreciatively. “Yeah, I got it.” He smiled. “I’ll be back in a little bit.”

He wanted to go work out the rap by himself for a little while before he performed it for her. She laid out on the floor, feeling like she was having a particularly low energy today. She could have honestly crawled into the corner and taken a nap, but she didn’t even feel like putting that much effort into it. She just stared up at the ceiling and wondered what her friends were doing while she waited for Chengcheng to come back. 

“Okay, I’m ready. Can you play the bridge?” he asked as he bounced back into the room. She held her hands up in the air for him to pull her up. He did and she lost her balance and fell into him, but he steadied her, holding her against his body for a moment. “You okay?” He let her go reluctantly

She nodded and went to the keyboard. She played the bridge while he recited the rap he’d just written. When he was done she turned around to him with an excited expression. 

“That’s it!” she cheered and gave him a high five. 

“Yeah?” he asked, excited but unsure. 

“Hell yeah!”

“Okay. Let’s do it from the top. You play and help me with Wenjun, Zhengting and Quanzhe’s parts. I’ll do the rest.” He sat next to her on the bench. 

“You’re sure you want to share it?” she wondered, slightly surprised. 

“Yeah, I think it will be better if we all do it together.” They smiled at each other and she began to play. 

“Do you like it?” she asked nervously when the song ended. 

“I love it! We have our first song,” he smiled and put his arms around her. “See, it’s all gonna be fine,” he assured her as she leaned into him. 

“Thanks, Cheng-ge,” she said before hopping up. I’m going to go get my laptop so we can record it. 

While she was gone he called the office and asked for an appointment to present the new song. The secretary told him they should come in the following day. 

“Who was that?” Qiao asked when she walked back into the room. 

“I got us an appointment at eleven tomorrow morning to show them the song,” he told her happily. 

Her jaw dropped open. 

“What?” 

“Chengcheng! That’s so soon!” she cried. She looked at her phone. It was barely noon now, less than 24 hours.

“Don’t worry, Qiao-jie. The song is great. We just need to give the impression of it. It doesn’t need to be perfect.” She was about to start hyperventilating. He put his hands on both her shoulders to bring her back down. “It will be okay,” he promised. “If you want we can get Zeren and Quanzhe to help us with the demo when they get home.” He tried to calm her but it didn’t seem to be helping. He put his hands on her cheeks like she had done before. “It’s going to be great, Qiao-jie.”

She took a deep breath and returned to her body. She batted his hands off her face. “Fine. Let’s get them to help. I’m going to perfect the keyboard track. You go...practice your rap or something.”

“Okay,” he agreed, hoping she wasn’t too mad at him. 

By the time Quanzhe and Zeren got back to the apartment she had convinced herself she was as happy as she was going to be with the instrumental track. Chengcheng taught them their parts and they rehearsed for about almost an hour before Qiao would let them get anywhere near recording. It was already after ten before they were able to convince her that it sounded great for a demo recorded on her laptop. It actually sounded great for anything, but she wasn’t truly convinced so much as giving in to their clear desire to call it quits for the night. 

“I’ll go down the street and get us some cheeseburgers from McDonald’s,” Chencheng said as he grabbed his wallet. 

“I’ll go,” she told him, wanting desperately to escape the apartment, even for just a few minutes. “Be right back,” she said and left before anyone could say anything else. 

“What happened to her?” Zeren asked when she was gone. “Did she find out about the comments?”

“I don’t think so. I think Zhengting was just right about the pressure. I may have pushed a little too much today,” he admitted. 

Zeren punched his arm. “What did you do that for?”

“I’m sorry. I really think the song we wrote is good, and I was excited to show it to the higher ups. I didn’t think she would take it so hard. But they must be putting a lot of pressure on her to produce,” he guessed from their previous conversation. 

“Everyone just be extra nice when she comes back so she’ll know we’ve all got her back,” Quanzhe said with a hand on each of their shoulders. 

“Seven cheeseburgers and four medium fries, please,” Qiao said to the guy at the counter in McDonalds. She paid and waited a few minutes for the food. She tried to let herself feel every second of them, finally having a moment outside of the apartment and idol world. When her order was up she grabbed the bag and headed back to the apartment. She would have liked to have gone slowly, but she would feel bad if the burgers were cold when she got there, so she hurried along. As soon as she stepped out of the restaurant she got a ding on her phone. It was her friend Jung-hee from South Korea.

_Are you okay?_

Why wouldn’t she be? Well, she was a panicking wreck, but that was just part of her creative process. Nothing to trouble her too much. 

_Fine. Why? What’s up?_

_I'm glad you’re handling it well._

_Handling what?_

Jung-hee sent her a link to the idol blog the boys had been looking at earlier that morning. It had been shared around on weibo a lot. She scanned through some of the comments as she continued to walk, bumping into a couple of people. 

_Whatever. I don’t care._

She was lying though. She didn’t want to care, but the tears coming up in her eyes and the blood making her face hot told a different story. She pushed the button for the elevator an excessive number of times, surprised herself how badly she wanted to suddenly retreat back into the apartment. 

_Is everything going okay with the boys?_

_Everything is fine._

She shoved her phone in her pocket and told herself she wouldn’t talk to Jung-hee for look at anymore stupid internet comments tonight. She walked into the apartment and dropped the bag of food on the counter before walking right past the group of boys. 

“I’m going to bed,” she said loudly over her shoulder and slammed the door. 

“What did you do?” Zeren demanded to Chengcheng. 

“In the last ten minutes? Nothing!” He opened up the bag of food and started eating, guessing that she would want to be alone when she was upset like he did. 

“Aren’t you going to do something?” Quanzhe asked, looking at both of the boys. 

“What can I do?” Chengcheng asked. 

“Maybe she’ll call Zhengting and he can help her,” Zeren offered, too intimidated to venture over to her room and try to talk through whatever was bothering her. 

“Ugh!” Quanzhe set out Zeren’s food and then took the bag with him to Qiao’s door. He knocked softly. 

“Go away!” she called from within. She really wished Zhengting or Wenjun were there. They were both good listeners and great shoulders to cry on, and she let herself be angry at them for being absent. 

“Jiejie, can I come in?” Quanzhe asked in a soft voice, wanting to perform his brotherly duties in Zhengting’s absence. She said nothing. “Jiejie, you need to eat something.”

She was going to tell him to go away again but her stomach growled and she didn’t want to go to bed hungry. Slowly she got up and walked to the door. She actually felt the smallest bit of relief when she opened the door to his sweet, pinchable face looking down on her. She huffed and frowned at him. 

“Let me come in, and we can eat and talk about whatever is bothering you.” He gave her a half smile. 

She huffed again and opened the door all the way to let him in before closing it behind him. She was thankful to have someone willing to fill her brother’s shoes. They both sat on the floor in the middle of the room and he handed her a cheeseburger.

Zeren was going to go to his room, but couldn’t stop himself from going to her door to eavesdrop. 

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of your, jiejie?” Quanzhe asked before taking a bite of his burger. 

She sighed and pulled out her phone. “Have you seen this?” she asked, showing him the blog post. He nodded while he chewed. “Is this what you guys were talking about this morning?” she wondered, suddenly putting the two together.

Quanzhe nodded again as he swallowed. “Zhengting said not to tell you. He thought it would be better if you didn’t know.”

She looked sadly over at his neatly made bed. “My brother knows me well.”

“How did you find out about it?”

“A friend sent it to me just now.”

“They’re just dumb comments from people on the internet. Don’t take it personally,” he told her, knowing it was a cliche thing to say.

“People always say that, but I don’t know how you’re not supposed to take it personally when it’s about you,” she grumbled and took half a bite of her cheeseburger. 

“I know. I get it. People make lots of comments about me, too.” He studied his food for a moment. “I just think, those people must not have a lot going on for them that they have the time or energy to talk shit about people they don’t even know. And I don’t have the time or energy to care about it. There’s other stuff to worry about, you know?”

“I guess you’re right,” she said, even though she didn’t really feel it. 

"Nothing they said is true," he promised, looking at her seriously though his bangs.

She took a big bite of her cheeseburger. "You don't think I look fat?" She asked with her mouth full. 

He laughed heartily. "Nope. But I do like a girl with a good appetite. Here." He handed over the bag of fries.

"I don't really care about what they said," she told him after she'd chewed and swallowed. "I guess I'm more upset that they would bother to talk bad about me at all. Like I'm trying to be someone for them to have any opinion about. I'm not. I'm nobody."

"I'm sorry. It's our fault. We can't take you anywhere," he said apologetically.

She sighed. "I guess we'll just stay locked up here all the time."

"I know it sucks sometimes. That's why we are usually happy to take any publicity gig we can get. It helps just to get out of here and out into the world. But it's never fun to have people constantly taking pictures and to not be able to go out with friends. It’s been more fun since you got here though,” he smiled wide.

“Thanks.”

“I’m sorry Zhengting’s not here to comfort you,” he said as he crumpled up his wrappers and placed them in the bag. 

“You’re a pretty good stand in,” she admitted. 

“Did I make you feel better?” he asked eagerly. She nodded. He actually had a little. He stood up to leave. “I’ll let you finish eating and get some sleep then.”

“Um,” she said, getting to her feet as well. 

“Yeah?”

“Can I...Can I have a hug?” she asked shyly. 

He laughed and walked closer to her. “Of course.”

“Sorry. We come from a touchy family,” she said as she wrapped her arms around him. 

“It’s okay. We have all gotten used to it,” he told her, hugging her back. Quanzhe was a good hugger, strong and not too quick. 

“Thanks, didi,” she said again as she finally released him. “Goodnight.”

“Anytime. Goodnight.” Quanzhe made his way to the door. 

Zeren scrambled to his feet, having allowed himself to sit against the wall outside her door as he listened. He wished he could have been the guy to comfort her, but he just wasn’t very good with words and he was even worse when it came to girls, given that he’d never met many or even had a sister like some of the other guys. He managed to step just inside his room right before Quanzhe stepped out of hers.

“Everything okay?” Zeren asked from the doorway, as if he didn’t know. 

“Yeah. She just found out about that internet crap. But I think she’s feeling better now.”

“Good. Good.” Zeren nodded his head. “Well, goodnight,” he said, closing his door. He struggled to get to sleep that night, staring into the darkness and thinking about the talented and sensitive girl in the room next door. He had been moved by the song that she and Chengcheng had created and he was worried he was going to lose the challenge. More than that though he actually connected to its meaning. He was beginning to understand love songs for maybe the first time in his life, because he was sure he was in love with her. His imagination had away with him, just like she had said. He found himself wondering about her all day long, wanting to spend time with her and hoping that someday she would love him back, even if he was sure she never gave him a second thought.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chengcheng and Qiao present their song to the execs.  
> Zeren does his best to cheer her up.

Zhengqiao couldn’t sleep either. On top of the stress of the meeting she felt was quickly approaching with each passing second, comments from total strangers about her looks and her intentions were floating through her brain and not giving her a moment’s rest. Through the night she managed to piece together a few hours of sleep and woke up with dark circles under her eyes in the morning. She got out of bed early and went to the kitchen to make cookies. 

“What are you doing?” Chengcheng asked as she leaned against the kitchen counter staring into space while waiting for another batch of cookies to come out of the oven. He grabbed one off the top of the growing mountain and took a bite, making a satisfied sound. 

“Is Du Hua going to be there? Do you know what kind of snacks she likes? I should definitely bring them something because we are going right before lunch and if they’re hungry they might hate our song.” She was babbling. 

Chengcheng put his cookie down so he could put his hands heavily on her shoulders. “I’m going to need you to calm down, before you make me nervous, too,” he told her. She sighed. “Yes, Du Hua is most likely going to be there. But it’s going to be great. Trust me. We did a good job. Now you just have to let the chips fall where they may.” He picked up his cookie and took another bite. “Definitely bring these cookies though. And wear something that suggests you know how to write hits.” He spewed crumbs as he walked back to his room. 

After she took the cookies out of the oven, she went back to her room and stared at her closet, thinking about what he’d said. She felt stuck. Style wasn’t something she gave a lot of thought to, and she didn’t know what would fit his description. She decided to take a shower and think it over, but nothing came to her. After she dressed in sweats and dried her hair she went over to the forbidden part of the apartment. 

“Quanzhe,” she called toward his door. No response. “Quanzhe?” Still nothing. “Little hamster,” she sang into the hallway. 

Finally he opened his bedroom door. It was still dark inside. She felt bad for waking him up on his day off. “What’s up?” he asked, rubbing his eyes. 

“Quanzhe-di, could you do my makeup?” she asked in a sugary sweet voice. 

A smile broke across his tired face. “I’ll be there in five minutes,” he said and closed his door again. She skipped back to her room. 

“Is that what you’re wearing?” Zeren asked from his doorway as she passed. 

She groaned dramatically. “I don’t know what to wear!”

“Can I help?” He grinned.

“Can you?” she asked back, her eyebrows knitting together in a perplexed expression. 

He nodded and led her into her room. He browsed through her wardrobe while she looked on self consciously. She wasn’t sure she even owned anything that would qualify as cool. He pulled out a pair of tight, red, pleather leggings she had bought with Jung-hee in Seoul and had worn once when her friend made her go out to a club. Then he chose a black blouse to go with it. “Wear these with your tall black boots, and I’m sure you’ll be a hit.”

She eyed the clothes suspiciously while he continued to stand there. Then she looked at him. “Well, get out so I can change!”

“Oh, right,” he hurried out and closed the door behind him. 

A couple of minutes later she opened the door to all three of them standing there expectantly. 

“Well?” she asked after they all looked her up and down a couple of times. 

“That will do the trick,” Chengcheng approved. 

“Great,” she said less enthusiastically. “Who knew Ren-ge was not only a dance guru but a fashion guru, too?”

“Pfft.” Chengcheng dismissed her comment and walked with Zeren into the dance studio while Quanzhe came in to do her makeup. He finished just in time. 

“Are you ready to go?” Chengcheng asked from her doorway. 

“Yep. You have the track?” she asked and she checked herself in the mirror. The boys had actually made her look pretty good. 

“Yeah. Let’s go. Car’s waiting downstairs,” he told her. 

“You’re not driving?”

“Not this time. I think...they don’t want to risk us being seen in a car alone together,” he admitted. 

“Right. That makes sense.” She gave the other two light hugs and thanked them for their help. 

“Jia you!” Zeren and Quanzhe called down the hall after them. 

Chengcheng put his hand firmly on Qiao’s knee to stop it from bouncing as they waited in the lobby of Yue Hua. “I really need you to stop,” he said. She could hear the agitation in his voice. 

“Sorry,” she said and was about to start biting her nails instead. 

“Try to have a little confidence in what we created together. I think this song is good, and whatever they say we should be proud of it. Remember when we sat here and you told me you were not that easily intimidated? That’s the girl I need to go into this meeting with me.” His eyes looked pleadingly into hers. 

She took a deep breath and nodded. “You’re right. We made a good thing.” She gave him a genuine and appreciative smile. “Thanks, Cheng-ge. You’ve been a good partner.” He smiled back at her. 

They were called back by the assistant and led to the same boardroom as Qiao’s last meeting. 

“Good morning,” Du Hua said cooly, but with a polite smile. “We hear you have a song for us?”

Qiao bowed and presented her cookies to the assistant. “Thank you for meeting with us today,” she said in a voice that, to her own surprise, didn’t shake at all. 

Chengcheng bowed and said hello before walking to a console and plugging his phone in to play them the track. Without any further ado he played the song. Qiao tried not to look at their expressions as they listened. They allowed the whole song to finish before making comments, and she hoped that was a good sign. 

“You two wrote this song together?” Du Hua asked, pointing at the duo sitting nervously at the other end of the table. 

“Yes, ma’am. We collaborated on the music and the lyrics,” Chengcheng told her.

“And that’s you singing?” the boss asked, looking at Qiao. 

“Um, yes. Zeren and Quanzhe are also singing their parts, but I was covering for Zhengting and Wenjun. Chengcheng did his and Justin’s parts, and Quanzhe covered for Xinchun,” Qiao explained. 

“So it’s a song for everyone?”

“Yes,” Chengcheng answered, starting to feel nervous. 

Du Hua smiled broadly. “Great. I like it. I think it’s a good song. You should come in next week to beef up the instrumentation and get some initial tracks down. We’ll have you set up some time with Yu Ming,” she spoke quickly and seriously. 

Chengcheng and Qiao let free their own smiles. “Thank you so much,” they both said ecstatically. 

“Thank you. I honestly didn’t expect something so good and so quick from you Zhu Zhengqiao. I’m very pleasantly surprised. I hope to hear more soon.” Du Hua came to shake her hand. 

Qiao tried to take that for the compliment it was and ignore the undertones of low expectations. 

“Thank you again. I’ll get back to work,” she assured the boss. 

Qiao and Chengcheng hurried out of the room then and seemed to float down the hall back to the lobby. They set up a time to meet with the producer and enter the studio. While she waited for Chengcheng to transfer their demo file to the server she felt overwhelmed, in the best way, by how quickly things were moving from a reluctant idea she shared with the young man she’d really just met to a whole fat track at a big record label with a popular band. When she worked with UNIQ the process had been less intimate and she felt she had been less involved. She had essentially written a couple of songs for them and shipped her babies off to be processed by someone else. Now she had the opportunity to do it from start to finish and work with a great group of guys who turned out to be really supportive and helpful partners. She thanked her lucky stars for having shared a womb with Zhengting. 

Her exaltation lasted just about until they went to get in the car that would take them back home. It reminded her of all the restrictions of living and working with these guys and all the things people were saying about her online. 

“Qiao-jie?” Chengcheng asked, waiting for her at the open door of the black car with black tinted windows. She swallowed and walked over to get in. He put his hand on the small of her back, guiding her as he let her enter first and then sliding in after her. Even though she knew she shouldn’t, she pulled out her phone and went back to the comment section of that blog. There were more comments than last night, and they hadn’t gotten any better. People accused her of using her connections to get close to the Yue Hua boys, of using her brother to get a job, and continued to viciously insult just about everything about her. Tears were filling her eyes again. There were new pictures, too, of her going to McDonald’s the night before. She had suddenly somehow become recognizable and worthy of being stalked. Her heart sank.

Chengcheng didn’t expect her to be so quiet after the victory they had just experienced and he couldn’t help glancing over at her screen. Boldly, he reached out his hand and took the phone from her. He placed it face down on the seat between them. 

“You should call your brother when we get home. Give him the good news.”

“Mm,” she replied, looking away from him out the window. 

He was the last person who was able to give advice about ignoring people’s comments, particularly about his body, since he’d been facing them since the Idol Producer days, and it hadn’t gotten any easier. He didn’t have anything useful to say, even though he wanted to comfort her. And he didn’t know how to compliment her without making it seem like flirting, even though he found her very attractive and did want to flirt with her. It was an area he wasn’t prepared to enter, what with all the complications of their identities, and living and working together. He just let the silence continue until they reached home. 

“How did it go?!” Quanzhe asked the second the duo walked through the door. He and Zeren had been bouncing anxiously in the living room practically since they’d left. 

“Great! We have our first track for the new album! We will start working on it in the studio next week,” Chengcheng told them cheerfully. 

“That’s awesome!” Zeren gave him a high five. “Qiao-jie, why don’t you look like that’s awesome?” he wondered at her long face. 

“Huh? No, it’s great. Really great,” she said half heartedly. “I’m going to call Ting,” she said absently and went off to her room. 

“I don’t understand.” Zeren had hoped to see her return smiling and playful like she tended to be. He looked to Chengcheng for answers.

“I think it’s the internet thing still. She was pretty happy until she started looking at something on her phone in the car. I don’t know what to say to her,” he admitted. 

Chengcheng sat on the couch to play video games with Quanzhe while Zeren snuck off to her room, having a small idea he hoped would cheer her up. She could hear her talking to Zhengting from outside the door, so he waited. 

“Hey, Ting’er,” she said when he answered. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked by way of hello.

“What makes you think something’s wrong?” She plopped down on his bed, as if he were there with her.

“I’m your twin and I’ve known something was wrong since yesterday. Sorry I didn’t have time to call.” She could hear other people in the background, so he was probably on set.

“Oh, well…” she couldn’t think of the words. 

“Just pay them no attention,” he said simply, not needing an explanation. 

“Is that what you do?” she wondered. 

“I try. It’s not always easy," he admitted. "But I just tell myself they are jealous of how amazing I am.” She could hear the smile in his voice. 

“I wish I could have your confidence.”

“You should. You’re at least as good looking as me. And you’re definitely not fat! So don’t let them get to you. They’re fans. They obsess. It’s their job, just like we are meant to be obsessed over.”

“It’s not my job,” she argued. 

“Too bad. It is now. You’re part of the crew. It just comes with the territory.”

“They’re stalking me now,” she said miserably, kicking his shoes because she couldn’t bother him. 

“You’ll get used to it.”

“Ugh. Ting, you’re really not making me feel better,” she groaned. 

“Sorry. I don’t know how else to help you in this area. It is really just something you have to get used to. You will, if you stick it out,” he promised. 

“Fine.”

“That’s the spirit.”

“OH!” she said, just as she was about to say goodbye. “I almost forgot. Cheng-ge and I finished our song and took it to Du Hua. She liked it. We have our first track for the new album.”

Zhengting was silent for a second. 

“Ting?”

“You just wrote our first song for us and you’re letting this bullshit bother you. Do you know how ridiculous you are?”

“Is that your way of saying you’re proud of me?”

“I’m very proud of you, meimei. I can’t wait to hear it.”

“I’ll send you the demo,” she smiled in spite of herself. 

“Okay. I have to go now. Keep up the good work.” He hung up. 

She made a face at the phone for his lack of help. He really hadn’t made her feel any better. She changed out of the outfit Zeren had chosen for her into sweats and then opened the door and was surprised to see him standing “casually” against the wall opposite her door. 

“What’s up?” she asked.

“Still letting those trolls get to you?” he asked bluntly.

“I guess.” She looked at her phone. “Ting wasn’t much help.”

“Can I try to cheer you up?” he asked hopefully. 

The fact that he wanted to help meant the world to her. She felt warmth spread through her chest and she smiled just a little. “Sure.” 

He grabbed her wrist and dragged her into the studio. 

“Ren-ge, I really don’t feel like dancing right now,” she groaned.

“No, no. You just get to watch this time. I promise.”

“Oh. Okay, I can do that,” she smiled again and went to sit on the bench. Watching him dance was one of her favorite things.

“I have prepared this song specially for you,” he told her as he thumbed through his playlist. 

“I feel honored,” she grinned. She was already feeling better. 

Bruno Mars’ “Treasure” began to play through the speakers and he danced enthusiastically for her, singing along to certain parts. There was something about when Zeren danced that made the world seem right to her. It could have been the way he made every move perfect, or the fact that it always seemed like exactly the thing he should be doing at the moment he did it. To watch him dance was to watch a master, to see someone fulfill their destiny. It had such a sense of completeness that was hard to replicate anywhere else. It wouldn’t have mattered what the song was or if it were for her at all, it would have made her happy, but it meant all the more that he was putting in the effort. By the time the song ended she couldn’t smile any wider. 

He sat down on the bench beside her. “Do you feel better now?”

“I actually do,” she said cheerfully. She laid her head on his shoulder. “Thanks, Ren-ge.”

His mind went completely blank for a moment, just white. “You’re welcome,” he said, a moment late, but she didn’t notice. He suddenly had an instinct to put an arm around her and he couldn’t fight it before his arm was moving on its own. She seemed to lean into him a little more and he felt warm all over. His smile spread wider. “You’ve got one hit under your belt,” he said after a period of silence. “When should we start on ours?”

She pouted a little. “Let me enjoy this one for a few days.” She didn’t want to tell him that she had already been thinking about it while they were sitting there, or that in fact she had started on it almost immediately after moving in. 

“Sure. Take your time. I’ve never written a song before, so I won’t be as helpful as Cheng-ge,” he sighed. 

“Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out,” she assured him. Both of them smiled again. She suddenly got up. “I’m starving. Can any of you cook? I’m too tired.” He laughed and led her to the kitchen. 

When they got to the kitchen she suddenly noticed how messy the apartment had gotten. She’d been distracted by the work they had been doing and hadn’t seen everything piling up. 

“Boys, I hope you don’t think I’m going to clean up after you,” she said loudly to the two on the couch. 

“Aw, jiejie, come on. Don’t make us clean today. Please?” Quanzhe groaned.

“No. Everyone up. There are dishes that need washing, trash that needs taking out, vacuuming, and you probably need to do laundry and clean your bathroom too, but I’m not gonna get in the middle of that. Pick a chore and I’ll do the rest."

They could see that she and Zhengting were definitely raised in the same household, but she was somehow more intimidating, so they didn’t argue like they did with him. Zeren took on this dishes, Chengcheng started gathering up the trash that lay strewn around the living room and kitchen, and Quanzhe went for the vacuum. Once they’d all committed to a task she went to clean the bathroom that she was sharing with Zeren for the time being. Thanks to Zhengting, it wasn’t too big a task. When she finished she helped Zeren dry and put the dishes away. By the time they were done the other two boys were sitting on the couch playing video games again. Qiao and Zeren shared a look, and she winked at him, as if to say “I got this.” 

“Boys, shouldn’t you go clean your bathroom,” she said, leaning over the back of the couch between them. 

“Aw, jiejie, come on!” Chengcheng cried this time. 

“Go!” she told them, and they slowly got off the couch and dragged themselves toward their rooms, moaning all the way. Qiao and Zeren hopped over the back of the couch and took up their controllers. Quanzhe came running back to the living room when he heard the sounds of the video game. 

“You tricked me!” he yelled, crashing in between them and fighting Qiao for the controller. 

“You can have it back when your bathroom is clean,” she told him, just managing to keep it out of his reach.

“Ugh! Fine!” He stormed off again. 

Chengcheng came out ten minutes later, annoyed. “Zeren should have to go clean the studio, since it’s the room where he actually lives.”

“Eh, that’s fine,” he agreed as their game ended anyway. He handed the remote to Chengcheng and went off on his way. 

She suddenly remembered she was hungry and still hadn’t eaten so she went to make them all lunch and left a spot open for Quanzhe, satisfied that she’d been able to make them all help. When she finished she went down the hall to the studio where Zeren had already finished sweeping the floor and clearing the trash and was now dancing to BTS’s “Make it right.” She stood in the doorway and watched him dance until the song was over. She could see from his overall performance, something in his attitude or his face, that was something bothering him. 

“Something on your mind?” she asked, taking him by surprise as he turned quickly to see her. 

“I didn’t know you were there.” His expression was serious. She smiled and shrugged. “It’s nothing,” he replied to her question.

“Are you sure? I can listen, if you want to talk about it.” She looked sympathetically at him.

He shook his head. He didn’t want to bring up the internet comments again after her mood had improved so much and he hoped she’d put it out of her mind. He was telling himself that Zhengting was right and he had to respect the fans’ rights to say whatever they wanted. He knew that without them, both their adoration and their criticism, they wouldn't be idols at all. But he was honestly pretty angry that they had decided to take their obsessions out on her. He was happy she had come into all their lives, his in particular, and was frustrated that anyone else had anything to say about it. He also hated that he couldn’t protect her from them. But he couldn’t say any of that to her, so he just kept his mouth shut. “Come on, let’s dance,” he said, waving her into the room. 

She ignored the fact that she actually was tired and joined him because she hoped it would make him happier, and she knew it would make her happier to see him dance more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you choose Chengcheng or Zeren?  
> Who do you think she will choose?  
> Comment below! Thanks for reading! :) <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiao and Zeren write their song and get to know each other better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have mad respect for the writers on this site who are devoting themselves to their school work and not updating...I am not doing that. I hope you enjoy my procrastination!

Despite what she had said in the dance studio the day before, Qiao was already working on Zeren’s song the next morning. She was working through the melody, absorbed as ever with her headphones on. Zeren woke up late and found her there. He snuck up on her until he was close enough to unplug her headphones. She swung out at him. 

“Why do you guys always sneak up on me?!” she yelled in frustration. 

“Why are you never paying attention to your surroundings? Someone could come in here and murder all of us and you would have no idea until they got to you,” he joked. 

“I would have no problem with that,” she said under her breath. 

“Are you working on our song?” he asked, ignoring her comment. 

“No.”

“Liar.”

“I’m not ready yet. I’m just trying some things out,” she said quietly. 

“Show me,” he urged. 

She shook her head. 

“Pleeeease?” his face was too sweet, but she still hesitated. “Are we supposed to be writing this together or not?” 

She sighed. “Keep in mind that I’m just kicking an idea around,” she said as she placed her fingers on the keys. He swiped her notebook from the side of the keyboard where it was sitting. She jumped to snatch it back from him, but she let it go. After a deep breath, she began to play the melody she had been working on all morning. 

“It’s a dance song,” he observed when she finished. 

“Of course, every song is a dance song for you.”

“Yeah, but you wrote a dance song for _me_.” He smiled. “Can you speed up the tempo a little?”

She shrugged and played it a little faster. She liked it better that way, feeling less apprehensive about it than she had a minute before. “Oh,” she said to herself, as if it were obvious. 

He read her lyrics and shook his head. 

“What?”

“I feel...naked,” he told her. She gave him a strange look and he laughed lightly. “Are you writing this song with me or about me? It’s like you can see inside of me,” he breathed.

"Maybe you're not as hard to read as you think, " she smiled. "You like it?"

He nodded his head thoughtfully. "The idea of only communicating with your body, through movement, there's definitely something true about that for me. 'Come closer, let me tell you with my body.'" He smiled at her. "I love it."

She took the notebook from him and wrote down a couple more lines that just came to her. 

"Hey, you can beatbox, right?" she asked suddenly.

"Yeah, a little," he said and smiled shyly.

"Can you back me up with a beat?" She begged.

"Can you play your part again?" He asked.

She started to play and he cleared his throat. He created a beat more complex than she had anticipated, but it was perfect. She had him record it so she could play it on a loop. "Do you want to try out this chorus with me?" 

He picked up her notebook and practiced the line while she played. Slowly she added to the song, while he offered minor changes and suggestions. Eventually, he was no longer worried about the lines, unable to keep himself from dancing. 

Several hours had passed and she yawned loudly. 

"Do you mind if we stop here?" She asked. 

"No problem. You've done a lot today, " he smiled. 

“So have you. I’m glad you made me show you. You’ve made it so much better.” She smiled back at him and put a light hand on his shoulder. His brain stalled and he stood there stupidly as she wandered to the living room. 

It seemed like they were the only ones home, so she plopped down on the couch and decided to catch up on a show she hadn't watched in a while. She yawned again and her eyelids grew heavy. Before long she had fallen asleep. 

When she woke up there was a blanket on top of her that she didn't remember using before. She lifted up her head to see Zeren sitting at the other end of the couch with her feet on his lap. She made a small noise of surprise but was too comfortable to move. 

"You're awake!" He beamed. "I didn't know you like One Piece. You slept through a couple episodes, but we can go back. Did I wake you up?"

She shook her head and sat up, pulling her feet away from him, and his smile diminished a little bit. She sat in silence for a minute, her mind still coming out of her nap and going directly back to work. The show still played quietly in the background. 

"Have you thought about whether you want to perform the song with the other guys, or keep it as a solo?" she wondered out of the blue.  
He thought for a second. "It would make sense as a solo, but I think we should focus more on the group. Our last album ended up being a lot of solos, and I think it would be more fun if we did it together. There will be plenty of song to go around, as long as I get to be center," he smiled.

"Of course you get to be center. It’s your song," she assured him.

There was a knock at the door.

"That should be the take out I ordered." He jumped up to get the door and tipped the man who delivered it. "I have no idea when the other guys will be home. I may have gone little overboard," he said as he opened the bags of food and began to take out the containers. He danced a little in excitement.

"I can help!" she promised, happily getting to her feet.

"Tell me about yourself," she said to Zeren as they ate, happy to get this opportunity with him alone where they weren't working on something.

"Hmm, well, I'm a dancer in this boy band called NEXT," he smiled.

She gave him a light tap with her foot. "Tell me something I don’t know. When did you first know you wanted to be a dancer?"

"I don’t know exactly.” He scratched his head, trying to remember. “I always danced as a kid, since I was a baby really. If I heard music, I danced. If I had a song in my head, I danced. I started taking dance classes when I was in primary school. Before I had finished middle school I moved to South Korea to be a trainee at SM."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that. Wow. I guess I'm not that surprised. You're so talented."

"For most of my life, dancing is what I've done more than anything else. Instead of spending hours in school, I spent my whole day practicing."  
"Of course you practice a lot. That sounds exhausting."

"Not all of us get by on innate talent alone, Qiao-jie," he teased.

"But you do have innate talent. You were born to be a dancer." She truly couldn't imagine him doing anything else. "What about your family?" She asked.

"I feel like I barely know them now, to be honest. I've spent so much of my life separated from them,” he said sadly. “They live closer now, but I know my mom would like to see me more. I just hope she's proud of me. I hope I can repay them when they're older." She smiled at him gently, pleased with filialty. 

The front door opened. Quanzhe walked straight to them and started eating with his fingers. Qiao slapped him hand. 

"Go wash up," she admonished him.

Chengcheng looked at them with a smirk and a raised eyebrow. "Don’t let us ruin your romantic dinner."

Zeren looked at Qiao anxiously, but she just rolled her eyes at Chengcheng and got up to set them each a place. 

"How's the song coming?" Chengcheng asked a little smugly.

"It's great," Zeren grinned.

"Yeah I think we just need a good rap section. But I'm not very good at writing raps." Qiao sat back at the table and leaned her head against her fist, looking between the two boys.

"And I've never written a rap," Zeren admitted. 

"Well, I'm here if you need help," Chengcheng offered, "but Qiao-jie's better than she thinks."

She looked away and played with a strand of her hair.

"I know, she's great at everything," Zeren said dreamily.

"Oh, shut up," she grumbled as she blushed and got up from the table. The two boys laughed to each other at her bashfulness.

It took several days but, with minimal help from Qiao and Chengcheng, Zeren had written his first rap, and he was pretty proud of himself. Even Chengcheng was impressed when he heard it and felt a little worried he was going to lose the challenge.

"When do we get to hear the whole song?" Quanzhe asked.

"You'll have to ask Qiao-jie. I'm trying not to push her to a nervous breakdown like last time." He looked pointedly at Chengcheng. 

"I'm not having a nervous breakdown," she said loudly from down the hallway. "Get in here and let's try it out." She was a little gruff, though. 

The time it had taken Zeren to work out his part of the lyrics had given her time to improve the instrumentals. On her computer she had not only recorded the keyboard part, but drum and bass tracks. She also felt Zeren's beatbox that he did on the first day was a perfect touch so she wanted to include it as well, along with the vocals. She was genuinely impressed with his rap, but she always felt there was no skill he didn’t excel at. After teaching the others their parts she let them record. She was altogether feeling much better about this song than the first one. She didn't say as much to Chengcheng but, in addition to having more time to work out the kinks, she was simply more fond of this song than she was of the other. This time she was sure it was going to be a hit and was a little disappointed to have to wait through the weekend until Monday to be able to present it to Du Hua.

"Ugh!" Qiao groaned as she threw herself dramatically over the back of the couch, landing upside down, while the boys watched anime late Saturday morning.

"What's wrong, jiejie?" Quanzhe asked sympathetically. "Stressed about your song?"

"Not stressed. I just don't know what I'm going to do with myself all weekend waiting for this meeting. I feel like I'm gonna explode! I think I'm having a rare spell of energy." 

"I know what to do!" Zeren said happily, jumping up from the couch.

"What?" She wondered. Blood was starting to rush to her head.

"No," said Chengcheng flatly. 

"You don't have to come, Cheng-ge. In fact, consider yourself uninvited," Zeren told him.

"What are we doing?" She was still lost, though she really should have guessed it by now.

"We are dancing, of course!" He cried.

"Okay!" She cried back. 

"Really? You're not gonna argue?" 

"Not today!" She tried to get up from her position, but couldn't.

"Can I come?" Quanzhe asked innocently. 

Zeren ruffled his hair. "Of course you can, lil ham." He was thrilled that Qiao was willing.

"Guys, I can't get up," she said, sticking her hands in the air for help.

They each grabbed a hand and pulled her up over the back of the couch. All the blood rushed down from her head and she blacked out for a second, falling into Zeren who caught her and held her firmly. "You okay?" He asked, her head just below his and he could smell the unique scent of her, nearly intoxicating. 

She steadied herself. "Yep. I'm good. Let's go," she assured him and disentangled herself from his embrace. 

He wanted to hear some more of her Latin music and she showed him some moves she had picked up from watching many YouTube videos. They danced for hours with Quanzhe leaving somewhere in the middle.

"Don't you ever get tired?" Qiao asked as she fell onto the floor in her usual heap, though she had lasted longer than usual.

"Actually, right now, I'm exhausted," Zeren yawned and laid down beside her.

"Me, too," she yawned in response. "I could just lay here and sleep until Monday." She wasn't lying. She curled herself into a ball and closer her eyes. He watched her as she fell asleep, peaceful and angelic, looking a lot like her brother but even more delicate. It wasn't long before he also fell asleep on the dance floor, not for the first time.

They woke up to Qiao's phone ringing through the speaker it was still connected to. It played WYTB loudly. She scrambled, disoriented by the long afternoon nap, to remember where the actual phone was and how to answer it. "Hello?" She answered groggily.

"Zhu Zhengqiao?" A familiar voice came in loudly through the speakers. She groaned and disconnected the phone. Zeren was just pulling himself awake. 

"Yeah, who is this?"

"It’s Wang Wenchu," said the voice on the phone. Her old college roommate. "It's been too long. You don't recognize my voice anymore."

Qiao scratched her head, as if that would make her brain work. "Sorry, Wenchu. I was just napping. I'm not quite awake yet."

"Sorry to wake you. You were always a good sleeper," Wenchu commented, neither an insult nor a compliment.

Qiao laughed a little. "What's up, roomie?"

"How come you didn't call me when you got to Beijing?!" Asked the other girl, her volume rose unexpectedly, causing Qiao to pull the phone away from her ear.

"I didn't know I was supposed to. Are you living in Beijing, now?"

"I've been here for almost two years. I live with Lingling. Wow, I can't believe we lost touch like this! Don't you ever get on Weibo?"

"Eh. Not really," Qiao admitted. She and Wenchu got along as roommates, but were never really best friends.

"We need to catch up! What are you doing tonight?"

"Oh. Um…I…"

"Come out to this club with us? A friend of mine owns this place. There will be lots of cute guys there!" Wenchu tried to encourage her. 

The thought of more dancing made her want to crawl into bed for a week, and she didn't really care about meeting any guys, but the opportunity to get out of the apartment was alluring. She looked over at Zeren. "I don't know, Wenchu," she hesitated. "I'm pretty tired today." She yawned involuntarily. "Let me get back to you in a little bit, okay?" "Okay, call me back!" The other girl yelled before hanging up. 

"What was that about?" Zeren wondered, finally getting to his feet. 

“My college roommate. She wants me to go out tonight,” she explained. She didn’t even know what time it was. Almost five o’clock. She still felt very disoriented. How long had they even been sleeping?

“You should go,” he encouraged her. 

“Why?”

“Because how many chances do we have to get out of this apartment for some fun?” He shrugged. “You have more chances than we do, so do it for us.”

“She did say there would be cute guys there,” she said, just to see what his reaction would be. 

“In that case, I take it back. You should definitely not go.” He grabbed her phone and pretended like he was going to throw it away. She snatched it back and he gave it up without a fight. “But honestly, I wish I could go to a club and dance. I’ll probably never have that chance,” he lamented. 

“You would put everyone else to shame,” she told him. “It wouldn’t be fair.”

“You’ve been working hard. You deserve to go out and have some fun.” He smiled gently at her. 

“Hey, I have fun here, too,” she smiled.

“Really?” His face lit up.

“Yeah, of course. Today was fun!” She grinned, thinking of their time just dancing for fun. He’d been a little less intense about it than usual and it was more just like playing around. “And I know I can get kind of grumpy when finishing a project, but I have really enjoyed working with you. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize for anything. You take it seriously, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I get the same way with choreography. But I’ve enjoyed it, too,” he assured her. 

She sighed, feeling relieved in a way she didn’t know she needed relief. “Okay, I think I will go out with them. It might be fun!” she tried to convince herself. “Mmm, but I might need my style team,” she looked at him pleadingly. 

“Oh, no. I’m not going to serve you up on a platter to all those ‘cute guys’ you’re going out to see. Sorry.” He joked, mostly. “But I’m sure Quanzhe will be willing to help you.”

After she cooked them dinner, Quanzhe gladly offered his help with her makeup and choosing an outfit. 

“Thanks, didi,” she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek when they were both looking at themselves in the mirror. “I’m helpless without you.”

He fussed with his bleached hair. “I know. But that’s what I’m here for. I wish I could go with you,” he admitted sadly. “You have to have fun on my behalf.”

“I will,” she promised. 

She got a notification that her ride was downstairs and they walked out to the living room. Chengcheng and Zeren both stared at her with their jaws dropped. 

“Quanzhe-ge, I thought I told you, good, but not too good,” Zeren admonished the younger boy, who shrugged. 

“Shut up,” she told him, blushing, as she walked to the door. She couldn’t help smiling when her back was to them. “Don’t wait up!” she called back to her little bros.

The night out passed just like any regular one would. They didn’t do much catching up over the loud club music, but she drank and even danced with some cute guys, and for the first time in several weeks she felt just like a regular twenty-four-year-old. It was a nice, though brief escape from the idol world and the stress of work. She didn’t know how the guys lived like that, nothing but work and being locked up in their tower. It was nice that all their needs were essentially taken care of and there were millions of people who adored them, but she wasn’t sure it was worth it. She couldn’t complain too much though. She really was enjoying working with them on their songs, even if it felt stressful for her at the time. She was proud of the song she had made with Chengcheng and she had no doubt that the song she wrote with Zeren was going to be a hit. She couldn’t wait for all the boys to come back so she could share similar experiences with them. Overall she was feeling much more optimistic about the task given to her, or maybe it was just the vodka. 

After struggling with the lock she stumbled her way through the front door of the penthouse around two a.m. To her surprise the kitchen light was still on and Zeren was asleep on the couch, but he was roused by her noisy entrance. 

“Did you just get home?” he asked, rubbing his eyes. 

“Yep,” she said, making her way to the couch to sit down, feeling a little spinny. “Thanks for encouraging me to go.”

“It looks like you had a good time,” he grinned at her obviously drunk appearance, her hair a little disheveled. 

“I did,” she sighed and leaned back, closing her eyes before deciding that was not a good idea. “Did you have a good night?”

“It wasn’t bad,” he shrugged. “Regular.”

“Thanks, Ren-ge,” she said drunkenly, putting her hand on his knee. 

“For what?” he wondered

“You guys have been really good to me. I was kind of worried when Zhengting left that I was going to feel very alone here, but you’ve been so nice to me. I appreciate it.”

“No need. It’s what we should do. We promised him we would take care of our jiejie,” he smiled a little in spite of the fact that he distinctly did not see her as an older sister. “But more than that, I really like having you around, and you’ve done a lot for us, too. You’re one of us, now, so no thanks are necessary. I’m just glad you’re happy here.”

“I am,” she admitted. Her eyes fell closed again. 

“Do you want to go to bed?” he asked.

“In a minute,” she mumbled. Her ability to fall asleep anywhere definitely made her one of the gang, he thought. In a minute she was snoring ever so lightly. 

“Qiao-jie?” he asked, nudging her gently, but she was undisturbed. He considered his options. He could easily just leave her on the couch with a blanket, but considering she had spent several hours sleeping on the studio floor that afternoon he knew it would be better if she slept in her bed. He managed to pick her up without her waking and he carried her to her room, trying desperately not to think about the fact that he was touching her bare legs. He removed her shoes and set them neatly by her bed. He covered her with a blanket and brushed the hair out of her face. He allowed himself a few extra seconds to look at her before going back to turn off all the lights and go to bed.

Quanzhe slid his phone under Chengcheng’s face as he drank his morning coffee. 

“Why do you even look at this crap?” Chengcheng asked him, sliding the phone back. 

“I like to know what people are saying about me,” he shrugged. 

Zeren snatched the phone off the counter and sighed, “Damn.” It was a word with a lot of meaning in the moment. On the one hand, he hadn’t even considered that her going out on her own the night before would be remotely the topic of internet gossip. Surely if it didn’t have to do with them directly, no one would care? But he had been wrong. On the other hand, she looked _good_ , and he couldn’t help reacting to it all over again. And then, there was the fact that she had been photographed dancing with a guy in the club, and he felt a twinge of jealousy. 

“What should we do?” Quanzhe asked, taking his phone back. 

“Nothing. We were explicitly told to do nothing,” Chengcheng reminded him. 

“Do you know her friend’s name was that she went out with last night?”

“I think it was Wenchu. Why?” Zeren asked, crossing his arms. 

“I’m pretty sure she was the one who took and posted these pictures,” Quanzhe said, looking closely at the page. 

“You think she was set up?”

“I’m almost certain.”

“Damn.”

“I’m going to tell Zhengting and Wenjun and let them deal with it.” The others nodded, sure it was out of their depth. 

Qiao slept late and went straight to the shower when she pulled herself out of bed. She couldn’t remember how she got there the night before, but she seriously regretted not washing her face. When she got out she dressed herself in sweats and went straight back to bed. It was Wenjun who called her several hours later, after consulting with her brother. 

“Hey, Jun-ge,” she smiled, happy to receive a call from him. 

“Hey, Qiao-jie. How are you?” He tried to sound positive. 

“Ugh, tired.”

“Did you go out with Wenchu last night?” he asked bluntly. 

“Yeah. How did you know that?” He didn’t say anything right away. She was slowly piecing things together. 

“I don’t think you can trust her,” Wenjun said quietly. 

“What do you mean?” But she was already coming to the conclusion herself. 

“We think she might have set you up for some gossip. It looks like she writes a gossip blog,” he told her.

“What?” She raised her voice. 

“It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known. And you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just, you need to be careful with her.” He hoped he was being supportive. 

“I should have known better when she called me out of the blue and knew I was in Beijing.” She sighed, disappointed in herself for not being more suspicious. “I’m sorry,” she said, tears coming to her eyes. 

“What are you apologizing for?” he wondered.

“I don’t know. I just feel stupid.”

“Don’t worry about it. Really, no one is blaming you. We wouldn’t even bring it up if it weren’t to tell you to stay away from her. Some people will use you because of us. We should be the ones apologizing.”

“No. You’re right. It’s no one’s fault,” she tried to convince herself of that. They were both quiet for a moment. 

“Hey, Qiao-jie?”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t go look at the post,” he said, reading her mind. 

“Is it bad?”

“It’s not that bad. It’s just not a good practice to have. There’s nothing you can do about what people say about you online, so just stay away from it. Promise?” He was good at telling her the truth, especially when she needed to hear it. 

“Okay. I promise.”

“Good.” Another pause, neither wanting to hang up. “I heard you have two new songs.”

They chatted for a while about what they were writing and what had been going on at the apartment, and he told her about his work. Just being able to talk with him made her feel happier and helped her to forget the reason he had called in the first place. When they hung up she tried hard to stick to the promise she had made to him. She didn’t interact with the other boys at all except for the few minutes she came out to get something to eat and then went straight back to her room. She felt too embarrassed to face them, and they were too shy to go talk to her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiao's bias is revealed.

Qiao had gone to bed early and woke up feeling well rested the next morning. She almost collided with Zeren as she came out of the bathroom. They did an awkward side-stepping dance, blocking each other’s path. They both laughed awkwardly.

“Are you okay?” Zeren asked as they both gave up on trying to move.

“I’m good,” she smiled half heartedly. “Do I look bad?”

“No. Not at all,” he assured her. “We just barely saw you yesterday.”

“I’m fine. Just a little in my head. But I’m ready for today,” she told him confidently. “Don’t worry.”

He shook his head and smiled. “I’m not worried. It’s going to be great. And even if it’s not, which it will be, I still had a good time working with you and I’m still happy with it.”

“Me, too,” she smiled for real. “Do you have the file?”

He nodded and they both went to finish getting ready. 

Quanzhe popped his head into her room. “Do you need help with your makeup today?” 

“No. I did it myself. Do I look okay?”

“You look excellent. Zeren’s not the only good teacher,” he grinned. 

“No, he’s not.” She ruffled his hair. “See you later.”

She waited for Zeren in the living room. Her jaw dropped when he came out. 

“What?”

“You’re wearing _the_ yellow shirt,” she smiled. 

“It’s my lucky shirt,” he said, as if it were obvious. “Not that we need luck. But it couldn’t hurt.”

They went down to the car and listened to the track all the way to the Yuehua headquarters. No matter how many times she listened to it, she couldn’t find any part she disliked. 

When they got to the lobby the assistant called Qiao back first, alone. Her heart sank when she heard her name and she gave Zeren a pained look as she went through the door. 

“Fighting!” he said, pumping his fist in the air and gave her a reassuring look.

She was led to the familiar room where Du Hua was seated alone. She bowed before being told to sit. 

“Good morning,” Du Hua said calmly. “Did you have a good weekend?”

Qiao’s stomach turned itself into a knot. “I’ve had better,” she admitted. 

“So you know about the blog post?”

“I have been told. I haven’t looked at it,” she said honestly. 

“That’s good. You should block it out,” Du Hua went on. “You’re not in trouble,” she reassured the young woman, reading her facial expression. “I just wanted to talk to you for a minute woman to woman.” She got up and walked to the end of the table to sit beside the girl. Qiao’s heart raced. “This is a difficult business for women. There’s nothing wrong with being young and having fun, but you are now in the position to be judged by others. Your success comes at a cost. There are a lot of sacrifices, and this is one of them. It’s important for you to stay out of the public eye. We don’t want the focus shifting from the boys to you. Understand?”

“I understand,” Qiao said, her voice shaking. 

“How are things going at the flat?” the older lady asked, her expression unreadable. 

“Things are good. The boys have been good to me, and we are being very productive,” she promised. 

Du Hua gave a signal to her assistant, who then left the room. “Good. I hope you’ll work hard. I’m looking forward to this new song of yours.” She stood up and walked to her regular position. “Oh, by the way, did you bring any of those cookies?”

“Oh, no. I’m sorry. I wasn’t feeling very well yesterday. But I won’t forget next time.” She smiled in spite of herself. 

She stood instinctively when the door opened once more and a man entered who she hadn’t seen before. He was younger and more hip looking than the executives she had met before. Zeren followed close after. 

“This is Yu Ming, who you’re going to start working with this week. He’s one of our producers.” 

She and Zeren both bowed. 

“Okay, let’s hear what you’ve brought us,” Du Hua said with a smile. 

Zeren hooked up his phone and began the track. Qiao dared to look for their reactions, unlike last time. Yu Ming immediately began bobbing his head to the beat. 

“Who’s beatboxing?” Yu Ming asked before the first verse had even finished. Qiao pointed to Zeren, who raised his hand bashfully. Yu Ming nodded approvingly. He continued to react positively throughout the rest of the song. Du Hua kept a fairly stoic expression, but Qiao thought she could see a smile pulling at the corners of her lips. 

The song ended and the few seconds of silence that followed felt long to her. 

Yu Ming looked at Du Hua. “I think it’s a hit!” He grinned, clapping his hands together. 

“I love it,” she admitted. 

“Really?” Qiao couldn’t stop the work from escaping her mouth. 

"It's fresh. It's sexy. Very cool."

“I think we have our next single,” the boss nodded happily. 

Qiao and Zeren turned to each other smiling. He threw her arms around her and lifted her off the ground, causing her to giggle. Zeren liked the way she felt in his arms and the sweet smell of her perfume. The elders in the room shared an amused look and raised eyebrows. 

“Thank you so much!” Zeren said to them after he set her back on the ground, a little reluctantly, and went to shake all their hands. 

“Don’t thank us. You guys worked hard. But it’s just the beginning. I want to get to work on this as soon as possible,” Yu Ming told them seriously. 

“Yes, sir,” Qiao agreed, a smile still plastered across her face. 

“Two songs in one week. Keep up the good work.” Du Hua’s voice was full of expectations, but Qiao finally felt she could handle it. 

“Yes, ma’am,” they said in unison. 

“Let’s go look at the schedule,” Yu Ming said and led them out of the room. 

The duo were still buzzing when they got into the car. They gushed the whole way home, reliving the experience and complimenting each other. 

“Your beatboxing blew him away!”

“Your lyrics were so amazing!”

“I knew they would love it!”

Many more high fives and hugs were shared. When they got back to the apartment they couldn’t wait to tell Chengcheng and Quanzhe, but they’d both gone off to complete some other obligations. 

“Come with me,” Zeren said, taking her by the wrist and pulling her toward the studio, a familiar action to her by now. “I know we just finished the song but I can't help myself. I spent all day yesterday working on an idea for the video. I’ve almost got it all choreographed, but it’s a duet, so I need your help,” Zeren told her, pulling the handkerchief that had been fashionably hanging from his pants and tying it around his head, ready to work. She agreed, now completely over her hesitations in dancing. She’d even built up her stamina over the weeks of dancing with him. He led her through the steps he had prepared and received input from her on filling in the blanks and making certain parts feel more natural. They moved quite harmoniously together. She didn’t take much leading and easily followed him through each part, though he reminded her a few times about balance. The very end included eight counts of him backing her into a wall. It was a powerful and seductive move, and made her heart race more than any of the more challenging moves. He ended up with his hands on either side of her head, looking down into her eyes. The faint scent of his sweat drifted into her nostrils. It smelled sweet to her.

“Okay, let’s take it from the top, and try it with music,” he said, calm and business-like. He was still in choreographer mode, like he had been for hours. 

She nodded and swallowed hard as they walked back to their starting positions. He started the music and off they went. His choreography matched the music perfectly, as usual. She had done a good job learning it, too, and he couldn’t help but be impressed by her skill and grace. He was thrilled by dancing intimately with her and he could feel the union of the thing they had created together filling him up inside. He fell more in love with it and her as the song went on. As they finished the last move he was closer to her than he had been before, and they maintained eye contact as the last note went silent before starting over on a loop. His face was just inches from hers and he wanted very badly to lean down and close the last bit of space between their lips. 

He resisted. He swallowed. “One more time?” he asked, his breathing heavy. She nodded and he lingered there for a second more, still considering how close they were and wishing momentarily that he were brave enough to follow his desires. Then he pushed off the wall and returned to his starting position once more. She followed, unsteady and light headed.

He started the song over again. This time he allowed himself to be closer to her at the appropriate moments and let his hands linger on her body as much as timing would allow, making the dance more sensual and deepening the meaning of the lyrics. She allowed herself to go with the flow of his changes and found each move more compelling the more he put into it. She liked the way he held her firmly, and told her he wanted her, even if it was only for the dance. Finally the song was coming to an end and he backed her right up against the wall, leaving barely any space between them and holding his position until the last beat faded away. Just as he was about to pull away, feeling too overcome by the moment, she put her hands around his neck and pulled his face to hers in a kiss. He was shocked, but gave into it without hesitation. He had never imagined she would do this, but he had been dreaming about kissing her for weeks. Literal dreams that left him feeling weak and wanting in the morning. He closed the remaining space between their bodies and pushed her against the wall. She enjoyed his weight against her. Although she had initiated the kiss, unable to control herself from getting swept up in the moment, she was pleasantly surprised to receive such a forceful reaction from sweet, funny Zeren. He took his hands off the wall and let them drift from her shoulders, down her sides, onto her hips before he finally pulled away, breathing heavily. “One more time?” he asked. 

Chengcheng came home and shook off the rain from his jacket. He followed the sound of the music down the hall to the dance studio. Probably Zeren had Qiao trapped in another dance session and he was either going to save her or be sucked in. When he got to the doorway the two were against the wall, kissing passionately. He leaned back against the wall outside the doorway where they couldn’t see him. He felt a moment of sadness for his ill-begotten fantasy of Qiao, but it passed quickly as he came to the realization that it had been only that, an idle fantasy brought on by the boredom of his nonexistent love life. He liked her, but not romantically. In the moment, he didn’t feel jealous, or even bothered by the two of them embracing. In fact, it seemed perfectly natural to him, as if he should have seen in all along. He decided to go back to his room and let them have their privacy, just as he heard Zeren say, “One more time?”

He changed his plan and decided to surprise them. He came through the doorway suddenly, just as they were returning to the center of the room. “How did your meeting go?" He asked with a smile.

Zeen cleared his throat. "They loved it. They said it would be the first single. We are just working on choreography right now.” He babbled nervously.

“Wow. Choreography already. Can I stay and watch?” Chengcheng asked, knowing he was making them squirm. 

“Uh, sure,” Zeren responded, suddenly nervous. He created a little more distance on this run, somewhere between the first and second tries, hoping to tone down the passion in front of his sudden audience. Qiao did her best not to feel nervous and forget all the steps, but it was difficult when she kept remembering the heat of Zeren’s lips on hers. This time they did not linger in their final positions, not even waiting for the song to end, but he did give her a meaningful look when they were close that let her know he very much wanted to kiss her again. 

“I think that’s enough for today,” he said, clapping his hands together. 

“Okay, cool. I’m going to go shower,” she said and ran out of the room as fast as possible. 

"Zeren, Zeren," Chengcheng said with a click of his tongue and shake of his head after the girl had left the room. 

"What?" Asked the shorter boy nervously as he took his phone off the auxiliary cord connected to the speaker. 

"You're more of a master than I thought," his friend went on. 

"Uh," was all Zeren managed to say as he rubbed his neck anxiously. 

"Your choreography is absolutely inspired. And you even got Qiao to be a part of it. I'm truly impressed." He clapped to show his appreciation. "I'm not sure I'd perform that dance in front of her brother, though." Chengcheng wore a sly smile. He was getting a perverse pleasure out of teasing his bandmate, even though he was happy for him deep down. He knew that was Zeren's first kiss, unless he was hiding something from Chengcheng. 

"Oh," Zeren said quietly. He had forgotten about Zhengting. For almost the whole day he had actually forgotten that Qiao was his friend's sister. He genuinely hadn't had any intentions of making a move on her. Even though he couldn't stop thinking about her eyes and her lips, kissing her and how much he enjoyed being around her, he had never planned to do anything about it. He didn't have the courage. He was thankful for her more forward nature that she opened the door. But now he was only thinking about Zhengting. "Do you think he'd have a problem with it?" he wondered aloud to the man by his side.

"A problem with what?" Chengcheng asked, still enjoying his game.

"With our dance," Zeren tried to cover. 

Chengcheng shrugged. "Maybe not. Hard to say with Ting. He might be okay with it."

"You think so?" Zeren’s voice was distant.

Chengcheng only shrugged and walked out of the room. 

Zeren sighed all the way back to his bedroom where he sat on the bed and was torn between thoughts of what Zhengting might say and the sweet memory of Qiao's lips and body against his. He really wanted to give it another shot, but he was also worried about the repercussions. 

In the shower Qiao couldn't stop smiling and giggling to herself. For two years, since she first saw Zeren dance on Idol Producer, he had been her bias, and just like all the other D Babies she had let herself imagine more than once what it would be like to kiss him, to dance with him. Since she'd arrived she had been holding herself back, trying not to let her feelings show or to act like a fan girl, although it was always hardest when Zeren danced. She understood suddenly why every girl on the internet hated her guts; she had, in fact, used her privileged position to get close to one of the guys, even though it wasn't her intention. She never imagined that she would find herself in this position. When she found out she would be moving in with all of NEXT she worked hard to stop thinking of them as idols and rather as people. It wasn’t all that difficult once she got to know them and they quickly became friends. She'd actually found Zeren to be very sweet and funny, and they had a lot in common. Even as his feelings for her were becoming more and more clear she had tried to deny her own, not wanting to delude herself with fantasies, especially with him so close and them having to work together. Now, though, it seemed all bets might be off.

She got out of the shower and dressed quickly, anxious to talk to him. She found him still sitting on his bed. The expression on his face did not inspire confidence and she suddenly felt her joy melt away, worried that maybe the positive response she had gotten to her impulsive behavior would turn into something negative. She knocked on the open door, but he was off in his own world.

"Knock knock," she said. "Earth to Zeren," she smiled as she caught his eye. "Can I come in?"

He simply nodded. At first she was going to sit beside him on his bed, but she thought she had maybe been forward enough with him today and maybe she should pull back, so she sat across from him on Wenjun’s bed instead. 

"I'm sorry if I went too far and made you uncomfortable today," she said, trying to interpret his expression. 

"Do you regret it?" He asked, surprised by her apology. 

"No! It's just… you look like you might, and I'm sorry if I got carried away and did something inappropriate." Her face was starting to feel hot and she knew she was blushing. 

"I don't regret it," he reassured her eagerly. "I'm just worried about…" He couldn't finish. 

"Zhengting?"

"Yeah, and basically everyone else," he admitted. 

"Would you rather have our first kiss in front of all of them?"

He laughed, which was her intention. She liked the sound of it. He made a mental note of the word ‘first.’ "No. Definitely not. I just feel...I don't know, like I stole the prize or something. "

She laughed once through her nose, almost more of a sigh, before she pushed off the bed and went to look at the knick knacks on top of Wenjun's dresser. "Am I really just some sort of prize?" she wondered. 

He got up and stood a foot or two behind her. "Yes and no. I mean we were all fighting to be your bias, but I think we were really trying to win you. I know you're not just some trophy. I...I really like you." It felt like a release to confess it, although he thought ‘like’ was too mild a word.

"What if I told you there was never any fight? That I was playing you all for fools and I've had a bias all along." She traced the edge of one of Wenjun's yoyos, unready to face him.

"I don't think I care anymore," Zeren replied after a moment of thought. 

"Why not?" She wondered, finally turning around. She didn't look directly at his face, but at his hips as he took a step closer to her so he could touch her hand with his fingertips. 

"Was that only our first kiss?" he asked, taking another half a step.

"If you want it to be," she said, letting her fingers play with his before intertwining them.

"Can I have more?" He wondered, feeling he was testing his fate. 

She nodded. "As many as you want." She finally looked up at him with full brown eyes and he held her gaze for a long moment before he closed the remaining distance between their bodies. He gently cradled her cheek with his other hand and counted his lucky stars for this moment with her, that fate had delivered her right into his lonely, caged existence, regardless of what others would think later on. Finally he leaned down a little to close the space between their lips and gave her a tender, loving kiss, less intense than before but more steady and earnest.

He pulled away reluctantly and sighed. "Do you think your brother will be mad?" He couldn't help but ask. He couldn't go on kissing her while it still troubled his mind.

"Mad? No. Probably a little surprised. And it might take him a while to get used to it, but he won't be mad. Ting doesn't really get mad. That's one of the great things about him."

"Oh," he said quietly. He tried to think of anytime he'd seen Zhengting truly angry and realized she was right. Their leader was prone to dramatic outbursts, but he was never actually mad. "He won't feel like I've betrayed him?" In all the time Zeren had been falling for her he hadn't wrestled with these questions because he never thought his longing would come to anything. 

"As long as you treat me well, what cause would there be for betrayal?" Zeren didn't answer. He wanted to trust in their twin bond, and that if she thought it was okay, everything would be alright. 

"Mmm...what about the others. Are they going to be mad?" she asked.

He thought about it for a moment. "If you were just any girl, not Zhengting’s sister, I'm sure they'd be happy for me. So, the same probably applies here," he reasoned.  
"Good. So, do you want to keep talking about this or do you want to make out?" She asked with a mischievous smile.

He looked down at her, surprised and amused by her shift of thought. Without saying a word he reached out his hand to close the door and then leaned down to give her small, gentle kiss. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into her, wanting more. His hands found their way to her hips and he pushed her gently against the dresser, causing some of the objects on top to wobble audibly. Her lips smiled against his before she slid her tongue against them, and he parted them willingly so his tongue could meet hers. He felt chills down his spine as she gripped the hair at the back of his head and he couldn't help the small moan that escaped his throat.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. "You guys want to order pizza?" Chengcheng asked from the hallway. 

They broke apart, breathless. "Sure," Zeren said unevenly. They both stood very still, their bodies still pressed together

"What do you want on it?" 

Zeren sighed. "Whatever is fine." 

"Can you open the door?" Chengcheng smiled sadistically on the other side.

Qiao looked up at her partner with wide eyes but an amused smile, curious to see what was going to happen. Zeren sighed again and pushed her behind the door. Then he opened it a quarter of the way.

"What's up?" He tried not to sound annoyed.

Chengcheng pushed the door open until it met resistance against Qiao. She held in a small whimper. "Have you seen Qiao-jie?" He asked, looking around the room.  
"Uh, no. She's not in her room?" Zeren scratched the back of his head, trying to smooth his hair.

"Nope. I wonder where she could have gone." He could barely contain laughter. 

"Huh." Zeren tried to look anywhere but behind the door.

"Okay. I'm getting peppers on the pizza," Chengcheng said, trying to provoke Qiao out of her hiding place. 

"Fine," Zeren said, ready for him to leave. "Wait. No. Qiao-jie doesn't like peppers on her pizza,” he remembered. Qiao smiled behind the door.

Chengcheng gave him a dirty look for ruining his trick and for being an observant love-sick puppy. He left, closing the door behind him.

Qiao couldn't help but smile and chuckle at Zeren's stressed expression when she was revealed behind the door. She walked over to him and grabbed his shoulders to lift herself up and place one kiss on his cheek. 

"Do you think he knows?" Zeren wondered aloud.

"How would he know?"

"Maybe he saw us earlier."

She shrugged. "I don’t think so. Wouldn’t he have said something?"

"I don’t know. Should we come clean to him?" 

"Not just yet. We are going to the studio tomorrow. I'll see if he says anything." 

“You and him in the studio tomorrow? Should I come with you?” he suggested. 

“You’re not getting possessive already, are you?” she teased. 

He looked away, a little ashamed to realize that he was. “I actually have an interview tomorrow, anyway,” he told her, brushing some hair from her eyes. “Otherwise I would really be tempted.”

“You have nothing to worry about. I’m not interested in Cheng-ge,” she promised. 

“Really? Xinchun thought you were when you first got here. He’s convinced Chengcheng is your bias.”

“Well, who says he’s not?” she smiled mischievously as she fastened the top two buttons he always left undone. 

“But you said...” he eyed her suspiciously. “You!” he laughed. 

"This really is your lucky shirt, huh?" She brushed off his shoulders. 

"I told you," he grinned and pulled her against him for another kiss.


	9. Chapter 9

Yu Ming met Chengcheng and Qiao in the studio the next morning. One of the good things about the pair of them together was that they could work very seriously, and they were both trying hard to be their most professional to impress the senior. Yu Ming in turn was a good mentor. He carefully explained the equipment in the recording studio and patiently answered all their questions, although they both had some experience, Qiao from school and Chengcheng from past recording experiences. Qiao was delightfully surprised with the amount of control he was willing to give her, and that he was going to give her credit as co-producer. They spent some time in the morning discussing their concept for the song and what they wanted from the final product with him, and by lunch time Qiao had already recorded the piano track as the basis for the song.

After they all agreed they were satisfied with her track Yu Ming excused himself from the studio for a lunch break. Qiao was in the live room seated at the piano, fiddling around with some other melody, while Chengcheng was still in the control room. He clicked the button to talk to her through the microphone. 

“You did a really great job today, Qiao-jie,” he complimented her. 

“Couldn’t have done it without you,” she replied with a thumbs up. 

"Let's go get some lunch, my treat," he offered. 

"Um, no, thanks. I'm just going to hang out here and practice." She went back to playing on the piano. Chengcheng got up and walked into the live room and sat very close to her on the piano bench. 

"What are you working on?" He asked in a low voice.

She shifted a little to the side. "I'm not sure yet."

"It sounds nice.” He looked down at her until she looked up at him and he leaned in a little. 

“What are you doing?” she asked bluntly. 

"You're really pretty Qiao-jie," he said quietly.

She leaned away from him. "Chengcheng?”

“Yeah?” he asked.

She gave him a weird look and got off the bench. “Seriously, what are you doing?”

“I...I...Okay, I can’t do this,” he sighed. 

“Do what?”

“Uh, I saw you and Ren-ge kissing in the studio yesterday. I was going to try to flirt with you today to see if you were just messing around with him, or...I honestly don’t know,” he admitted awkwardly. 

“What?! Do you have feelings for me?” she asked, taking a step farther away from him. 

“No! I don’t. I just want to know if your feelings for him are real. He’s my friend, and I don’t want him to get hurt.”

She stared at him, wide-eyed. It was actually sweet, even if his ways were weird, she thought. Then she smiled. “My feelings for Zeren are very real. I promise. I don’t want to hurt him either.”

Chengcheng smiled, relieved. “I’m glad. You guys actually look really good together. And I know he likes you a lot.”

“Really?” Chengcheng nodded. “Can you not tell anyone yet? I haven’t told Zhengting, and I don’t want everyone to know before him,” she pleaded. 

“Yeah, no problem,” he agreed.

In the afternoon Yu ming put her to work on composing the electronic parts of the song, drums and bass lines. By the end of the day the instrumental parts were almost all completed and ready for mixing. 

She found Zeren in his room reading manga when they got home that evening. 

“Can I come in?” she asked from the doorway. 

“You’re always welcome here,” he assured her. “You never have to ask.” He was just thrilled to have her there. “How did it go?”

“Well, I think,” she said as she sat on his bed. “But my part is done for now, so I guess it’s just going to sit there for a while,” she sighed. 

“I’m sorry. I can see that’s stressing you out,” he said, rubbing her thigh. “It’ll get done, and it will be great,” he comforted her. 

“Thanks. What have you been doing today?” she wondered. 

“After getting home from the interview, I’ve just been waiting for you to come home,” he said, sitting up so he could kiss her. She smiled against his lips. “Did Chengcheng say anything?” he remembered to ask. 

“He knows,” she said with a nod of her head. 

“He does?” Zeren asked nervously, although he wasn’t sure why.

“Yeah. He saw us yesterday. I guess right before he walked in.”

“Was he okay with it?” Zeren was sure Chengcheng also had a crush on her.

She nodded again. “He’s handling it very well. I asked him not to say anything to anyone else though.”

“You don’t want them to know?”

“Not just yet,” she said. “Let’s keep it our little secret for now.” 

She kissed him again and he gladly gave into her. But he couldn’t help wondering why she didn’t want anyone to know. Was she ashamed of him? Or was she simply unsure of her feelings? It wouldn’t be surprising to him that her feelings for him weren’t equal to his own. He couldn’t expect that, but he was anxious to know just how deep her feelings went. He didn’t know how, or even if he could ask such a thing, so he just struggled with it on his own. 

The next morning Qiao woke up a little later than usual and found Zeren sitting alone in the living room on his phone. She sat down heavily next to him on the couch. 

“Where is everyone?” she wondered, thinking it was awfully quiet.

“Chengcheng left early this morning to Changsha for a couple of days. Quanzhe has...something. I wasn’t really listening. He’s gone all day.” He put down his phone to look at her. 

“Your schedules are so hectic. I don’t know how you live like this,” she sighed, feeling like she needed a calendar to keep up with all of them. “But, wait, we’re home alone all day?” She smiled and her eyes flashed at him. 

He couldn’t help but laugh. “We are.”

“What should we do?” she thought, her mind running over the possibilities.  
He had some ideas, but he blushed just to think them, so he kept his mouth shut and turned away so she wouldn’t see. Just watching him she could tell where his mind had gone and she nudged him playfully with the ball of her foot. 

“Tell me what your perfect day looks like,” she said, leaning her cheek against her hand, waiting to listen attentively.  
He searched his mind, giving real thought to the prompt. She waited patiently, thinking of her own plans. Finally he breathed in and said, “I’d wake up early, but not too early and go into the studio, dance for a couple of hours, just freestyle. Then nap. Eat something. Hang out with my friends, play video games or watch a movie. In the evening I have dinner with my family, chat for a little while. After dinner, go for a stroll in the park with my dog,” he smiled and took her hand. “Bonus if you do any of that with me.” She smiled at the fan service he paid her. “What about you?”

“Wake up without an alarm. Eat pancakes for breakfast. Practice some music. Go swimming somewhere. Cook dinner for my friends. Fall asleep in the arms of my lover,” she smiled, playing with his fingers.

“That sounds like a nice day,” he agreed. “Kinda sounds like most of your days,” he grinned.

“Yeah, I’m pretty lucky,” she smiled back. “Maybe we could make some of it happen,” she thought out loud. 

“Pancakes?” he asked.

“You read my mind.” She got off the couch to go to the kitchen and pulled on his hand to bring him with her. “How come we’re never out of anything?” she wondered as she looked through the cabinets and refrigerator for the necessary ingredients. 

“They deliver groceries every week, or if we tell them we need something,” he explained, leaning against the counter and watching her as she moved around the kitchen. 

“How come I’ve never noticed?” she wondered.

“You sleep late,” he observed. 

“I do not. I sleep irregularly,” she corrected to his amusement. “Do you like blueberries in your pancakes?” she asked, delighted to find some. 

“I’ve never had them,” he said. She gave him a shocked expression. “Yours are the only pancakes I’ve ever had,” he explained. 

For some reason that made her happy. She took out the blueberries and washed them before setting them aside with her other ingredients. He snuck a few, along with a look at her butt as she bent over looking for a mixing bowl and a frying pan. He stiffened a little and forced himself to look away before she turned around. She caught him taking another blueberry and narrowed her eyes in a scolding expression. He paused, a large berry stuck between his teeth, wide-eyed like a child who had been discovered sneaking a cookie. She popped up on her toes to bring her mouth to his and steal it from him, their lips barely touching. His expression didn’t change as she pulled away, causing her to giggle. She decided he could have one more and popped a berry in his mouth before he closed it and smiled. 

“Who taught you to make pancakes?” he asked as she mixed the batter. 

“I lived with an American girl in Seoul for a while. She loved to make them. I formed a habit.”

“Do you speak English?” he wondered. She had added a couple of English phrases to their song.

“I’m not fluent, but I can probably have a simple conversation.”

“Have you traveled much?” He took another blueberry before she added them to the mix.

“No. I haven’t had time. Or money. I worked for several different companies in Seoul to make ends meet,” she explained. 

“How long did you live there?” he continued to grill her.

“Almost two years.”

“Why did you go there?”

She paused, hesitant to answer. She focused on pouring pancake batter into the pan.

“What?” he pushed, wondering why she stopped answering when she had seemed so willing before. 

“Uh,” she droned stupidly. 

“Does it have to do with a guy?” he wondered. 

“Well…” she hedged. “Not entirely. I had applied for and was offered a job by Yue Hua when I graduated, but I took it because there was a Korean guy from school that I liked, and he was going back.” She didn’t want to look at Zeren.

“Was he your boyfriend?” he swallowed, not quite sure why he was jealous of some past boyfriend of hers. 

“I thought so, but it was complicated. I don’t think he ever really cared for me,” she shook her head, still not looking at him, though she could feel his eyes on her. 

“Crazy,” he said, coming to stand beside her at the stove so she might look at him. 

“Yeah, I was a little crazy,” she admitted. 

He laughed. “I meant him.”

She shook her head again. “I was just young and stupid. I couldn’t see it.” she said, disappointed in herself. 

“How could anyone not like you?” he wondered.

“Well, he was engaged. Not that he ever told me that while we were in school. He had other obligations.” She sighed. “Like I said, stupid.”

“You follow your heart. I like that.” He gave her a warm smile. Her knees felt a little weak at the sight of it.

“Thanks for not making me feel foolish for it, but it was. And that was the last time I trusted myself with any guy,” she admitted.

“Mmm-” he hesitated with a thought, but decided to continue it anyway. “Do you think you can trust yourself with me?” he asked quietly.

“You’re the righteous and just Ding shao xia. How could I not trust you? You’re too sweet to ever be dishonest with me,” she smiled.

He was happy to hear she understood that about him. “I would never,” he promised her. He patted her hair gently and she giggled.

“Give me a plate,” she instructed as she flipped a pancake. “Anymore questions?” she wondered. 

“Not at the moment,” he smiled.

After they ate their pancakes she agreed to dance with him if she could choose the music. She put on an 80s pop playlist that started with Madonna’s “Get into the groove.”

“Get into the groove. Boy you’ve got to prove your love to me,” she sang to him and he lit up, ready to impress her. The next song was “P.Y.T.” by Michael Jackson, a personal idol of his. They spent a couple hours in the studio just goofing off, and when she was tired she helped him film a video to post for his followers.

“What’s next?” he asked, pulling her up off the floor. 

“Movie or nap?” she asked, putting her arms around his neck so she could kiss him. She did it casually but it was still new to him and it filled him with joy and excitement. 

“If we watch a movie, it could become a nap,” he sighed. 

“I’m okay with that,” she said, kissing him again. In fact she would be okay with anything if she was with him. 

They went to the living room to find something to watch. “Are you sure Quanzhe won’t be home for a long time?” she asked as they got comfortable on the couch. 

“I’m pretty sure,” he said, although he really couldn’t remember what the other boy had talked about doing that morning. Zeren settled into one end of the couch and without asking or hesitating Qiao settled into him, cuddling into his side and resting her head on his chest. He felt warm and tingly all over at her closeness. He put his arm around her and held her as they searched for something to watch. Eventually they settled on “Captain Marvel” because they both hadn’t seen it and Zeren liked American movies with strong female characters. But he couldn’t really focus on the movie at all because he was too preoccupied with the marvel at his side. He loved how open she was with her affection and how genuine she was with her feelings. She had a quality of being earnest and sincere that he appreciated about her, and made him feel like he could trust her completely. However, her closeness could also be a problem because, well, it was pretty much all he could think about. His eyes were on her more than the screen, and she could sense it. She looked up at him several times, only for him to look away quickly and pretend to be watching the movie. Once he didn’t look away and met her eyes instead, and it was done for. He couldn’t seem to stop himself from bending his head down to kiss her gently on the lips and she couldn’t let him stop there. Before long they were like a couple of teenagers making out in the movie theater, the sounds of the movie fading into meaningless noise and mingling with the sounds of their mouths against each other and their heavy breathing. Zeren was still fairly inexperienced with this, and unsure of where to put his hands so he just wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. They didn’t break apart until her phone rang. It was her mother, and she wanted to facetime. She pushed him toward the other end of the couch and sat as far away from him as possible, and then wiped her mouth quickly with her sleeve and told Zeren to be quiet before she answered. 

“Hello, mama,” she said loudly when she answered the call. When her video popped up on the screen she could see her lips were a little red and puffy from making out, but it was also dark in the room, so hopefully her mom couldn’t tell. 

“Hi, baby! Are you okay?” her mom asked immediately. 

“I’m fine mama, why?” she wondered if she could tell something was off.

“You look a little puffy. And you’ve lost weight,” her mom replied. 

“Oh, well, um, I didn’t sleep well last night, so that’s probably why I’m puffy. And I’ve been dancing a lot while I’m here, so I think I probably have lost a little weight,” she admitted. Zeren couldn’t help smiling off to the side, but he tried to silence his laughter. Qiao tried not to look at him. 

“You have to get good sleep, Qiao’er. Make sure you’re taking care of your health and your brother, too,” she reminded her daughter. 

“Yes, mama,” Qiao replied obediently. 

“Is Ting’er with you?” she asked.

“Oh, um, no he’s at work right now.” At least that wasn’t a lie. 

“Who’s there with you?” her mom wanted to know. 

“Um, Zeren is around here somewhere," she said vaguely, not liking to lie to her mother.

“Why aren’t you working?” 

“I wrote a couple of songs recently, and we are waiting to record them, so I’m just taking a little break,” she explained, not knowing if that was a legitimate excuse, but understanding herself that the creative process takes time.

“Well, okay. Tell your brother I said hi and tell him he should call me. Get some rest,” her mom said finally.

“Okay. I will. Love you mama. Bye bye.” She hung up the phone and let out a sigh of relief. “Where were we?” she asked, turning her attention back to the beautiful boy on the couch.

He made a show of looking all around and behind the couch. “Hmm. I don't know. Around here somewhere," he smirked 

She inched closer to him very slowly, maintaining eye contact, and there was something about it he found irresistibly cute. She didn’t say anything, just continued to stare at him with big brown eyes until he said, “Oh, I remember. We were here,” and kissed her once again. 

Later when Quanzhe got home she cooked dinner for the three of them, and Quanzhe wanted to play jenga afterward. Qiao felt bad that Zeren couldn’t have the type of evening he wanted with his parents and his dog. 

“Where is Wangcai?” she thought to ask for the first time. 

“He’s with my parents,” Zeren replied, surprised she knew his dog’s name.

“Oh. Are you guys not allowed to have pets here?” she wondered. She knew Zhengting would have a million pets if they would let him. 

“That’s not the problem,” he replied. “I’ve just had such a busy schedule recently that even if I’m in town there isn’t always someone to take care of him. And it can be difficult to do things like take him outside. Sometimes it’s just easier to leave him with my parents. They don’t mind,” he shrugged. 

“That sucks that he’s so far away,” she said sadly. 

“It’s not that far. They just live a little outside of Beijing,” he told her. 

“Oh? Then why don’t you go visit them on your day off?” she wondered. 

“I usually do, until recently,” he said, and tried not to blush.

She realized that he hadn’t been going because she was there. She wanted to tell him he shouldn’t neglect his duties because of her, but she didn’t want to reveal them to Quanzhe, so she kept her mouth shut until later. 

After Quanzhe won the game she followed Zeren to his room. 

“Why did you spend the day with me instead of going to your parents and seeing Wangcai?” she wanted to know. 

“I wanted to spend the day with you,” he said, confused because it was obvious. 

“You shouldn’t neglect them,” she told him. She was a little upset thinking of her own mother and the last time she’d seen her. 

“I saw them last week,” he said with a shrug, although he did miss Wangcai. “They work a lot, too. It’s not a big deal.”

“Promise me you won’t not go because of me. If you have another day off to visit them, I want you to go,” she insisted. 

“Okay. Maybe you could come with me?” he offered. 

She swallowed. That had not been her intention. She hadn’t even told her brother about them. It was definitely too soon to meet his parents. She thought it would be difficult to explain to people that they were living together. She cleared her throat. “Maybe it’s a little early for that,” she replied. 

“Yeah, maybe,” he said awkwardly. He honestly had no idea how any of it was supposed to work. 

She kissed him quickly on the cheek, hoping she hadn’t made him feel bad. “I just don’t want to be the reason you don’t see the people you love.”

He swallowed back the words that she was the person he loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TBH the only reason the last part of this chapter exists is because I regret not having Wangcai around. I just didn't know how that could work in this set up. But that dog is so cute and they are so cute together. Poor Wangcai. Forgive me, please.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEXT's new single has been our for over an hour, and I can't listen to it. If anyone know how to help this American girl listen to her favorite Chinese band please let me know.  
> In the mean time, please enjoy this extra long chapter.  
> I love you.

"Zhengting comes home tomorrow," Zeren reminded her as he came into Qiao's room on Thursday night.

"Yep," she agreed. 

"Have you told him about us yet?" he asked bluntly.

"Umm..." she looked around the room at everything but him.

He was getting impatient and nervous by her delay. "Why don't you want him to know about us?" 

"It's not that I don't want him to know about us. I just don't know what to say. 'Hey, bro, I've been making out with your bandmate,'" she said in a mocking tone. "Or maybe, 'hey gege, I'm falling for your friend.' I mean, we haven't even talked about what this is. So how can I talk to him?"

"You're falling for me?" He asked with a smile that she found charming in its extreme dorkiness. 

"Um," she swallowed. She hadn't even thought about the words when she said them, but they were true.

He felt a tingle of excitement radiate from his chest, down through his arms and legs. He took a step closer and ran his fingers from her shoulder down to her hand and laced them with hers. "I've already fallen for you," he confessed.

"You have?" She asked quietly.

"I thought it was obvious," he said as he pulled her in closer. "I fell for you the moment you got here."

She sighed and looked away from him. "That's only because I'm the first girl you’ve ever been this close to."

"I have met girls before," he defended.

"Yeah, but have you ever had any friendships with women before? Have you ever really talked to any?" She asked seriously. 

"Not really," he admitted. "What's your point?"

"Just that, it's natural you would develop feelings for me when you haven't really experienced it much before. You didn't have a normal teenage experience. When I was younger I used to form feelings for people very easily. I just wonder if that's what you're doing with me," she explained quietly, knowing it would be as hard for him to hear as it was for her to say.

"So is this because I'm young? Or because I'm inexperienced?" He asked, trying unsuccessfully to hide the anger he felt. She didn't answer. "Because I don't think either invalidates my feelings for you. I have had crushes before. But I've never felt about anyone the way I feel for you." She looked up at him, wanting to believe his feelings were true. "Do you-do you believe in fate? In destiny?" He asked shyly.

She nodded. "Yes." As a twin she had always believed in fate.

"Well I fell in love with you the moment I saw you. I believe you're a part of my destiny. I think being part of NEXT is my destiny, and that meant meeting Zhengting. And you were born as his twin, which means we were fated to meet. I should have continued not meeting any women, but instead destiny brought you here, into my home, my world. Are you willing to doubt that? To deny destiny?"

She was utterly shocked by his words. She was speechless. 

"All the other guys have similar experiences to me," he continued, "but they aren't in love with you. I am, because you are mine. And you don't love them, because I am yours." He brushed her hair behind her ear and held her face in his hands. "Do you believe me?" he asked, looking fervently into her eyes.

She nodded. "I do. I've loved you for two years. I picked you out of 100. I chose you every time."

"You did?" He wondered. "Wait? So I _am_ your bias? You're a DBABY?" He smiled. 

She frowned. "Don't say it like that. There are thousands of DBABIES out there," she pouted. 

"Only thousands? You don't think there are millions?" He teased, rubbing his nose against her forehead. She hid her face against his chest and he laid his cheek against her head. "Do you only love me as your idol?" He had to ask.

"No!" She said definitively, turning her head up to look him in the eyes. "I mean, I did love you as my idol. I won't lie; I was an adoring fan. But I've always known you were a real person, just like Ting. When he arranged for me to move in here I had to stop thinking of you that way, and I did. I learned to look at you as a dorky guy I lived with, but with incredible dance moves. And then I fell for you all over again."

"When did you start to fall for me?" He asked, intrigued.

"Hmm, I think it was around the time you did "Treasure" for me," she smiled, and stretched to give him a peck on the lips. 

"Really?" He smiled, pleased with himself. 

"Yeah. It meant a lot to me and made me really happy."

"I'm glad it worked," he said before giving her sweet kisses. "Wait, I got distracted," he said after a minute. "Are you going to tell your brother?"

"You want me to call him right now?" 

"No time like the present," he urged.

"Okay. If it's so easy then you call him," she suggested. 

"Okay," he said, calling her bluff after a moment of hesitation. He pulled his phone out of his pocket while keeping one arm around her. As he opened his contacts and scrolled for Zhengting's number he hoped she would stop him, but she didn't. Now that he was thinking about it, he also didn't know how to tell his friend who was like a big brother that he had fallen in love with his sister. 

"You scrolled past it," she teased. 

He turned off his phone. "He's coming home tomorrow, maybe it’s better said in person."

“I think you’re probably right,” she agreed. 

“Yeah, let’s just wait until he comes home and tell him together.” He tossed the phone away. 

“Good plan.” She looked around. “So what should we do now?”

“Wanna make out?” He asked. 

She nodded enthusiastically and led him to her bed, where she climbed into his lap. He wrapped his arms around Qiao’s waist and held her tight while she ran her fingers through his hair. She bit his lip and pulled on it gently, making a satisfying sucking and popping sound. She kissed him again, this time letting his tongue slip into her mouth and his hands to slip under her shirt to touch tentatively at the skin of her hips. He was still nervous, testing uncharted waters, but she let him and he didn’t push his luck too far. He picked her up and shifted so he could lay her on her back and hover over her, between her legs. With one hand holding him up, his other hand wandered up her side until he gently groped her breast, over the shirt. 

She felt like a teenager again and she was absolutely loving letting him take baby steps. She was also thankful because she wanted him, but she didn’t want to move too fast, so they had established a rule that if someone said stop, they would. She was still a virgin. She wasn’t waiting for _the one_ , but she was waiting for someone who loved and respected her, and who she loved back. None of her previous boyfriends had made the cut. Even though she knew there was a great deal of mutual respect between them, she was still wary of things moving too fast, and with them living together it would be too easy to jump into bed together right away. But there would be no coming back from that. And besides, she wanted her first time to be romantic. She wanted to be wooed. 

Luckily for her, he wasn’t in a huge rush either, as he was still nervous about just kissing her. He was grateful for her patience and that she let him go at his own pace. He hoped she understood all the things he was trying to tell her with his gentle caresses. That he loved, wanted and respected her. He was working hard to maintain his self-control while his thoughts often wandered to provoking fantasies he wasn’t quite ready to act out.

After a little while more of some PG-13 petting and kissing they were content to cuddle on her bed and watch a movie he chose on the TV in her room. She wasn’t really paying attention to it, but was just happy to feel his warmth and spend time with him. Eventually they fell asleep in each other's arms. 

In the morning, they awoke when the light flicked on. 

“Meimei, what the hell is going on?” Zhengting asked in a voice he was trying hard to keep level.

Qiao and Zeren shot up in bed, hair messy but still fully clothed, and it was obvious that they hadn't done anything excessively racy.

“Uh, Ting, you’re home already?” she scratched her head and turned away from the light. 

“Zeren, what exactly are you doing in my sister’s bed?” Zhengting asked, his pitch starting to rise. 

“I know this looks bad, but we really just fell asleep watching a movie,” Zeren tried to explain to his senior. “I-I wasn’t taking advantage of her or anything,” he promised.  
“Oh, bunny, I know,” Zhengting said patronizingly. “Why don’t you go and let me have a word with my sister?”

Zeren hesitated. He wanted to stay and help Qiao explain, but he also didn’t want to get yelled at. He looked to her and she assured him that it was okay and he should go. Awkwardly, he got off the bed and walked out of the room, reluctantly meeting Zhengting’s eyes as he walked by. The older boy closed the door behind him. 

“You seduced that sweet innocent boy!” Zeren heard Zhengting yell in the hallway, making him jump. He was a little offended by the comment, but he was also shocked that it was the first comment Zhengting thought to make. He hesitated between staying to listen and go to the furthest place he could find, so he just stood frozen in the hallway.

“I didn’t seduce him. If anything he seduced me,” she responded, thinking back to the seductive dance he had choreographed. Hearing that, Zeren moved as fast as he could toward the bathroom to shower.

“You know I don’t believe that,” Zhengting laughed. He sat on the bed beside her. “Tell me everything! When did this start?”

“Monday,” she said reluctantly, expecting his reaction. 

“What?!” he yelled, smacking her hard on the arm. “It’s been three days and you haven’t told me!”

“Ow!” she rubbed her arm. She forgot how hard he could hit. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to say, or even what exactly was going on.”

“But we’ve always talked about boys,” he pouted.

“Well, this time it’s different,” she said quietly. 

“Different how?” he wondered with a raised eyebrow. She smiled and blushed but didn’t quite find the words to answer. “Oh my god, you actually love him. Like love him, love him,” Ting smiled. 

“I do,” she smiled back. “Is that crazy?”

“Yes, but in a good way. I’m happy for you,” he put his hand on her head. 

“You’re not angry that I’m with you friend?” 

“What? No? That’s great! Does he treat you well?” he wanted to know. 

“Of course. He’s Ding shao xia. You know, he’s very sweet.”

“I know he is, but sometimes they can be deceiving.” He gave her a knowing look. 

“Not this one,” she promised. “He makes me very happy.”

“I’m glad. But Qiao’er,” he started, but hesitated. 

“What?”

He clicked his tongue. “I was just going to say, be gentle with him. He’s young. You’re his first...everything. Just, take things slow,” he said softly. 

Her jaw dropped at his insinuation. “You jerk!” she smacked him hard. “You think I’m going to corrupt him. I’ll have you know I’m fairly _young_ myself.”

“Qiao’er, you’ve had like dozens of boyfriends,” he stated, disbelieving her innocence. 

“So?” She crossed her arms and turned away from him. “And it hasn’t been dozens. I can’t believe my own brother thinks I’m slutty.”

“I didn’t say that,” although he had thought it a little. 

“You don’t think I would tell you if I did that before?”

“I don’t know if you’d tell me anything,” Zhengting said accusingly, referring to how their conversation had started. “And for the record when you do do it, I’m not sure I want to know.”

“Really?” she asked, surprised. 

He laughed. “No. I absolutely want to know. I mean, not like immediately, but within like, twenty-four hours, or our bond will be broken forever.”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re such a drama queen.”

“Hey, that means it’s only me and Xinchun that haven’t kissed a girl now,” Zhengting realized. “Aw, little Ren-ge’s growing up.”

She rolled her eyes once more and gave him a little shove. 

“Well, you wouldn’t understand. You had your first kiss at like, twelve,” he teased. 

“Oh my god. I was thirteen! And I’m not a slut. I’m just a romantic,” she said, crossing her arms. 

“Defensive much?”

“Shut up!” she said and pushed Zhengting off her bed. She got up too and went to look for Zeren, but he was in the shower, so she waited patiently until she heard him come out and then a couple more minutes for him to get dressed. Then she went and knocked on his door. 

Zeren opened it, not knowing which Zhu twin to expect. He was relieved to see Qiao. 

“Is he mad?” were the first words out of his mouth.

“I told you he wouldn’t be. He’s only mad I didn’t tell him sooner. He said he’s happy for us,” she smiled reassuringly.

“Should I go talk to him?” Zeren wondered. “You know, man to man?”

She couldn’t help but chuckle. “I mean, if you feel you must. But I think it’s really okay.” She laughed imagining what that would go like. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and kissed him softly. He pulled her closer and kissed her harder. 

"What do you have going on today?" she wondered, running her fingers through his still wet hair. 

"Shooting for a magazine." 

“Can I style your hair?” she asked, knowing they would change in anyway.

He smiled, amused by the request. “Sure.”

She took his hand and led him to the bathroom. He plugged in the blow dryer while she climbed up on the counter top to reach his head. She enjoyed the strange intimacy of the control she had, and being able to run her fingers through his hair, and the sounds of both their laughter coming through over the loud whirring of the machine. He thoroughly enjoyed her attention and the unbridled joy it brought to her face. 

“How do I look?” he asked when she’d finished and his head was completely dry. 

“Ugh. You always look good. Even I couldn’t mess it up,” she said as she straightened his collar.

“Were you trying to?” he wondered with a smiled. 

She shrugged, unable to say anything at the sight of his dimples. 

He pulled out his phone and opened the camera. “Smile,” he said, putting his face next to hers, and took a selfie. A message popped up on the screen. “I guess it’s time for me to go,” he said. He kissed her once on the lips. 

"What day is it, anyway?" She had been living relatively without a schedule for a few weeks now and it was showing. 

"May 14th," he replied after looking again at his phone.

"Really?!"

"Yeah. Why?"

"It's Xinchun's birthday today! I can’t believe I almost forgot." She hopped off the bathroom counter, as if she were immediately going to begin celebrations. 

"How do you even know that?" He wondered, following her out of the bathroom.

"I stan NEXT. How do you not know it?" she rolled her eyes.

He shrugged. "I'm a guy. We don't keep track of these things."

She rolled her eyes. "I bet Justin knows. Maybe this year I'll forget your birthday."

He grabbed her hand and pulled on it so her body collided with his. "You would never." 

“No, I wouldn’t.” She gave him one final kiss goodbye before returning to her bedroom. Zhengting appeared to be getting into bed, tired from his early flight.

"Are you working today?" She asked Zhengting as she rummaged through her closet for clean clothes. 

"Nope. I have a day off. I was just going to rest," he beamed. 

"Great, then you can help me prepare a celebration for Xinchun’s birthday."

"Is it his birthday again already?" Zhengting usually didn't forget things like that either, but he had been so busy. 

"Yes. So will you help me?" 

"Sure. What do you want to do?" 

"I was thinking of a nice home-cooked meal. Probably been a while since he had one of those?"

"That would be really nice," Zhengting smiled, thinking of how long it had been for him. 

"Do you know what his favorite dishes are? I want to surprise him."

"No, but I could call his mom and ask."

"You have his mom's phone number?"

"I'm their dad. I have all their moms’ phone numbers," he said very seriously. 

Qiao sat on the bed beside him as he called the number.

"Hello?" Answered a woman and he put it on speaker. 

"Hello, mama Huang, this is Zhu Zhengting from NEXT."

"Oh, hello Zhengting. Is everything okay?"

"Oh yeah. Everything is fine. My sister and I wanted to make a surprise dinner for Xinchun tonight and we wondered what his favorite dishes are. Can you help us?"

"Oh my. Xinchun has the nicest friends. I will text you a list! Thank you for taking care of my baby!" Mrs. Huang sounded almost in tears. 

"Of course, mama Huang. Thank you! Bye bye!" They hung up and the twins high fived. 

"We should probably call our own mom," Qiao thought out loud. 

"I always think that, and then I worry one of us will end up crying and then both of us will end up crying and then I never call."

"Same. We are bad children," she added.

"Yeah, but we're good siblings." He held up his hand for a high five.

"That's true!" She smiled, slapping his hand. "Do you want to go to the grocery store with me?"

"Oh, an outing! Sure!"

"Ugh. I bet you can't even go to the grocery store without someone taking your picture can you?"

"Let's find out." He hopped out of bed and started looking for clothes.

Qiao’s phone beeped with a message on wechat from Wenjun.

_BWJ: I thought I told you two to behave yourselves. You little minx. 💃_

_ZZQ: I guess it just couldn’t be helped._ 🤷♀️ 

_BWJ: This is what we get for leaving you unsupervised._

_ZZQ: I resent that._

_BWJ: JKJK. I’m happy for you guys._ 🥰🥰🥰 _Just be safe._

__

__

_BWJ: AND STAY OFF MY BED._

_ZZQ:_ 🙄🙄🙄

She got another message, this time from Zeren with the picture he had taken. She couldn’t help but smiled, liking the way they looked together. She wished she could post it on Oasis, but knew she couldn’t. 

“Mama Huang sent a really detailed list and links to recipes,” Zhengting said, walking into the living room.

“My mom?” Xinchun asked, walking into the room from the other hallway. 

Zhengting pulled up short. “No. Justin’s mom,” he covered quickly. 

“Oh,” he said and sat down on the couch to play videogames. Xinchun was not the kind to make a big deal about his birthday, but was glad he had the day off and was ready to spend it goofing off. “Where are you two going?”

“We’re going to the grocery store. Do you need anything?”

“You’re going to the grocery store?” Xinchun asked, looking at Zhengting.

“Yeah. Why?”

“Just seems weird. Are you cooking something?”

“I’m cooking dinner tonight. Zhengting is just spending the day with me.”

“I can cook.” Zhengting interjected, rolling his eyes. “But I’m just going to do something...normal you know?”

“That sounds weirdly fun. Can I come?” Xinchun asked. 

The twins looked at each other and shrugged. It was his birthday after all. They all put on hats, sunglasses and masks and set off for the store. It was not a typical trip to the grocery store for Qiao. For all his act of being the responsible dad in the group, Zhengting spent most of the time loading up their shopping cart with junk food. Xinchun wasn’t any help, either. She ended up losing them twice and then following them and putting back items as they put them into the cart. Eventually she was able to get everything she needed, and they were even able to get out of the store without being noticed by any fans. 

Qiao spent all afternoon cooking, and Zhengting was actually helpful, too. It seemed he hadn’t lost all the skills he’d learned on _Fantasy Restaurant_. Everyone else was banished from the kitchen for the time being. 

“Kung pao chicken wasn’t on the list Mama Huang sent us,” Zhengting commented as they were finishing up the dishes.

“Who doesn’t like kung pao chicken?” Qiao replied. 

“I know who _does_ like kung pao chicken,” smiled her brother. 

“Shut up,” she muttered, but smiled picturing Zeren’s face. Just then the front door opened and he walked in.

“Speak of the devil,” Zhengting grinned wider. 

“It smells delicious in here,” the younger man commented as he walked into the kitchen to stand very close to Qiao. He wanted to kiss her, but he resisted. “Do you need any help?” 

“Can you set the table?” she asked, having the same feeling as him. “Everyone come eat,” she called out to the whole apartment when they had everything set out. The other boys clamored in from all directions. 

“Woah, so much food,” Chengcheng marveled at the feast. “What’s the occasion?”

“Ugh.” Qiao rolled her eyes dramatically. “We’re celebrating Xinchun’s birthday!”

“How did you know my birthday?” Xinchun wondered. 

“She stans NEXT,” Zeren told them with a smirk. “She knows everything.”

“Wow. Thank you. I didn’t think anyone was going to celebrate with me today.” He was touched, and even more so when he looked around the table. “You made all my favorites. You did call my mom!” he looked accusingly at Zhengting, who smiled proudly. 

“Everyone sit and eat before it gets cold,” Qiao ordered them and they sat. She picked up her glass. 

“I want to wish Xinchun a happy birthday. I’m glad we are able to share it with you, as your second family. I wish you many more happy returns. To Xinchun.” 

Everyone clinked their glasses and drank. Then they turned their eyes back to Qiao, who was still standing. 

“And I also want to toast Zeren, Chengcheng and Quanzhe, who took very good care of me these last couple of weeks. I didn’t know what to expect when I came here. I didn’t know that I would find such good friends and partners. So thank you.” She finally sat down and Zeren took her hand under the table. 

“Geges,” he said, giving her hand a squeeze. “We should also toast to Qiaojie, who has done an amazing job already on our new album, and who is also my girlfriend,” he said proudly. 

“We already know,” Xinchun said, stealing his thunder. 

“What? How do you know?” Qiao put down her glass.

“Quanzhe told me.”

Everyone looked at Quanzhe.

“I saw her coming out of Zeren’s room late the other night,” he said as he started to fill his bowl with food. 

“And I saw them kiss in the dance studio on Monday,” Chengcheng announced, just so everyone would know he knew first. 

Qiao could feel her face getting hot and red. 

Zeren just wore a smug smile. “Good, so everyone knows now.”

“Does Justin know?” Qiao wondered. 

“I didn’t tell him.”

“Me neither.”

No one bothered to ask about Wenjun. She wondered if it might not be more fun to not tell Justin.

"Does this mean the competition is off?" Xinchun wondered with a full mouth.

"It's not fair to Zeren-ge to force her to admit I'm her bias. So for the sake of my gege, I respectfully forfeit." Chengcheng responded.

"Yeah right!" Cried Zeren. "You're just trying to save face because you don't want her to judge on the merits of our songs," he teased.

"I think you should still perform your songs," Zhengting said, finally inserting himself into the conversation. "Once we are all back together you should perform them with Qiao and the five of us should decide which is better."

"Zhengting we already know who your bias is," Chengcheng told him. 

"You're right, handsome. I can't deny it anymore. It's you!" Zhengting winked at him. 

Qiao looked at each of her two finalists, both looking sure of themselves, but Zeren still looked particularly smug.

"Okay. I'm game," she said before taking a drink. 

The three youngest guys dutifully offered to clean up after dinner, and when they were done Zeren found Qiao laying on his bed, waiting for him with a big smile. He closed the door gently and crawled onto the bed to hover over her. He didn't kiss her right away, just leaned over her and studied her face. She reached her hands up to his hips at his waist band. She bit her lip as she slowly began to pull his shirt out of his pants. She hadn't gotten to touch him as much as he did her because he was more shy and would usually stop her before getting very far. She wanted to be respectful of his boundaries. She also wanted to feel more intimate with him. This time he let her continue as she slid her hands underneath his shirt to feel his skin at his hips and his back. She continued to slide her hands up his back, feeling how fit and muscular he was. Then she let her hands drift to the front, down his chest, toward her true goal: his abs. She could feel clearly defined, two, four, six, eight. She traced them softly with the tips of her fingers. 

"I knew it," she whispered with a big fat grin.

He was lost in the sensation of her hands on his skin until she traced the outside of his lower abs all the way back to the waistband of his skinny jeans. Suddenly, he jumped off her and off the bed.

"Stop," he breathed.

Her hands retracted into balls and she pulled them down to her stomach. She sat up and let them fall into her lap and then stared at them.

"I wasn’t...I'm sorry," she whispered. 

"It's okay. I just...I…" He couldn't find words to explain why he loved the way it felt and why he needed her to stop. Every second they were together he wanted to go all the way with her, but he knew it was better to wait. They weren't in the right time or place to take that step yet, and he was always afraid if he let her get started he wouldn't stop, so he forced himself to maintain self-control. 

"You don't have to explain," she said. She actually would have liked an explanation, but she knew it was difficult for him and she didn't force him. She tried not to interpret his actions as rejection.

After a few seconds, though it seemed like too many to her, he came back to sit next to her on the bed. She didn't look at him until he picked up one of her balled up hands and placed it over his racing heart. Slowly she opened her fist to lay it flat against his chest and felt it beating fast. He brushed her hair back behind her ear and gave her a small smile. She pushed him down gently onto the bed with her hand and then pulled it away and replaced it with her ear so she could listen to his heart beat. She held him there for a minute while his pulse slowed. He wrapped one arm around her shoulders and held her hand, while they breathed together. She couldn't help but smile at this kind of intimacy too, and remembered he didn't need words to make her understand. A new melody started to play in her head.

After a few minutes she tried to get up, but he held her firmly to him. "I'm not ready yet," he said quietly to the ceiling.

She turned her head up to look at him and couldn't resist the urge to touch his face. His eyes were closed as she gently traced the profile of his nose and the outline of his lips. She shimmied herself up so she could get a better look at him. She placed the lightest of kisses on his cheek and he opened his eyes slowly. 

"Can I borrow your guitar?" She asked to his surprise.

"Of course," he replied, but gave her a strange look. 

She got off the bed, leaving his arms empty, and grabbed the guitar from the corner. "Thanks. Goodnight." She started to head for the door. 

"Wait. You're just gonna leave like that?" He wasn't sure if this was her reaction to his behavior before and it made him uncomfortable. 

"There’s something I want to work on," she said simply, facing neither him nor the door. 

He got up from the bed to take her empty hand. "Are you upset about earlier?" He had to ask. 

The right corner of her mouth pulled up in a smile that said, 'don't be silly.' "I'm not. I've just got something in my head and I'd like to get it out." She kissed him gently on the lips and turned away again, but he held on to her hand. 

"Wait," he said in a pitiful voice. "You can play here."

She frowned. "I'll probably be up for a while, and you probably need to get some sleep for tomorrow." She didn't usually like to be around people when she was working on something brand new, but she wasn't sure exactly how to tell him that.

"I don't have anything tomorrow," he smiled. She still hesitated. "I won't bother you, I promise. I just want to be around you. Your presence makes me feel happy," he confessed.

She melted a little and agreed, even though she felt nervous. "You go over there," she said, pointing to his bed. She went and sat on Wenjun’s bed and tuned the guitar. He laid on his side and watched her, feeling content. 

She played a single note and then stopped. "I can't play if you're looking at me," she sighed.

"Aw," he said, but turned over onto his back.

She played a little, but very tentatively. He guessed she was feeling nervous so he reached over and grabbed a book off his bedside table and began to read it, to give her the impression that he wasn't fixated on her, although he was. It helped a little though and she began to open up a little and let her ideas flow. There wasn't much in the way of lyrics in her mind yet, just a soft melody starting to take form. Between her quiet playing and staring at the words on the page Zeren actually fell asleep. When she noticed she covered him up with his blanket, turned off the light and left him alone.

The door to her own room was open a crack and she could hear Zhengting talking on the phone to Wenjun, so she didn't enter. Instead she continued down the hall to the studio. She sat with her back against the mirror and continued to play. She felt better being able to play alone. Unlike her brother she wasn't all that fond of an audience; another reason that she had never auditioned for an idol group.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While the collaboration with Yibo mentioned in this chapter is fictional, the hatred for him is inspired by my real life dislike of him. Sorry.

Early the next morning Zeren found her in the studio, still sitting on the floor, hugging his guitar. He squatted down in front of her.

"Qiao-jie," he said, gently patting her head and her arms until she woke up. Slowly she lifted her head and brought a hand to her neck, clearly in pain. "How could you sleep here all night?"

"I don't know. I was up late, and then by the time I was tired I didn't feel like getting up." She groaned.

He laughed and shook his head at how she could become so lazy in the strangest ways and at the worst moments. He took the guitar from her lap and lifted her up. "Come on. You should stretch, or you'll hurt worse." He began to stretch and she followed him automatically. "You shouldn't sleep like that, or you'll hurt yourself." His voice was concerned, but paternal.

"I know. I have a bad habit of falling asleep anywhere." She groaned as she reached down to touch her toes.

"You'd rather sleep here than in my bed?" She sensed a frown in his voice but she couldn't see his face.

"No. Not like that. But…" she hesitated.

"But what?" 

She stood straight up while he was still facing down. "I don't think it’s a good idea for us to sleep together all the time."

He stood up too. "Why not?" He didn't necessarily think she was wrong, but he wanted to hear her reasons.

"I just think with working together and living together, and not being able to leave this place much, maybe for now, while we're not, you know, intimate, it would just help slow things down." She went back to stretching. 

He considered her words carefully as he continued as well. She made a lot of sense, he thought. He had clearly sent her message the night before about slowing things down, so he could hardly blame her for thinking so. 

"Can you say something?" She asked after she felt like he'd been thinking for too long. 

"You're right. That's fine." There was little emotion behind it.

"I don't mean never. I just don't want it to be the expectation. I liked sleeping with you. That's the problem," she admitted. 

He realized she thought he was just appeasing her, but he wasn't. "I know. I mean it. It makes sense."

"Okay," she yawned. "What time is it? It feels early."

"It is. The sun's not up yet."

"Why are you up?" She wondered, rubbing her neck again.

He walked around to her back to rub it for her. "I felt like practicing."

"For what?"

"I'm meeting with Wang Yibo next week to collaborate on his music video. I haven't been practicing much lately, and I just want to get sharp because he always challenges me. We have a little bit of a friendly rivalry."

"I'm sorry. I've been distracting you," she smiled as he massaged just the right spot.

"Yes, you have, but it's not your fault. I've been working a lot, too." He smiled as she made a little moan.

"I'm also sorry you have to work with Yibo. Yuck." She made several noises of disgust.

"You know Yibo?" He sounded surprised. 

"You've forgotten that I worked with UNIQ in South Korea." He made a sound to indicate that he remembered. "You guys may have a friendly rivalry, but he and I have a hate hate relationship."

Zeren couldn't help laughing. "Why?"

She turned around to face him. "Well, I'm sure it's nothing personal against me on his part. He just hates women for some reason. And I hate him for that, and his arrogance." 

"How could anyone hate you? You're so cute." Zeren kissed her firmly on the forehead.

"Not everyone falls for my charms." She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head against his shoulder sleepily, breathing in the scent of him while he hugged her back. "I'm going to try to sleep a while longer, if that's okay."

"Of course. I'll be here, perfecting my skills so I can defeat Yibo on your behalf," he smiled before kissing her on the lips.

"That's my Ding shao xia," she smiled happily as she left the room.

Out of respect for his roommates, Zeren put on headphones to practice during the early hours, something he often did when he couldn't sleep, or sometimes just woke up with the time and the desire. Even though he frequently dragged others in to practice, because they needed it, he enjoyed his alone time in the studio a lot. He first put on the song he had made with Qiao. He didn't know when they would end up performing it, and it wasn't the same without her, but it was never a bad time to practice, and he especially wanted to work on his balance. It suddenly made him think of how quickly and easily they seemed to find balance between them in their disagreements and misunderstandings, or at least it seemed that way to him. He appreciated her honesty and how she could be straightforward when she needed to say something. She was much better at that than he was, but she was still able to understand him and he felt very lucky for it.

On Monday morning, Zhengting, Zeren, Chengcheng and Qiao all rode to the Yuehua building together. Zhengting would be the first to record his part for their new song and Qiao was thrilled to finally get the vocals rolling.

"Do you want to come say hello to your best friend?" Zeren asked as they approached the dance studio where he was supposed to meet with Yibo. 

"Maybe later," she laughed. "Let him get comfortable and then surprise him." They were being careful not to touch or say anything too flirtatious in the building, but she really wanted to kiss him as they parted ways. "Oh, I wouldn't mention that you know me, for now," she warned him as she continued down the hall with the other two boys. 

Although she had been urging Zhengting to practice all weekend, he hadn’t, so they spent most of the morning in rehearsals and finally got to recording around noon and took a couple of hours after that. Chengcheng was being particularly hard to please. Qiao suggested they take a break for lunch and ordered some food, but Chengcheng strangely refused to eat. Things were getting a little tense between the two of them so she decided to go down to the dance studio with Zhengting to cause a little trouble of her own.

When they got to the door of the room where she had left Zeren before she didn't hear any music, so she hoped they were taking a break. She knocked on the door and was told to come in. She stuck her head in. 

"Hey, Zeren-ge, have you eaten? I ordered some food for you."

"No. We haven't eaten. Come in." They were both sitting on the floor taking a rest and talking through what they had already done. Yibo didn't recognize her until she came to sit beside Zeren. 

"You!" he said loudly, almost like an accusation. 

"You weren't kidding," Zeren laughed, looking at his girlfriend. 

"What are you doing here? How do you know each other?" Yibo wanted to know, still accusing. 

"I'm working on NEXT’s new album." She looked at Zhengting beside her. "Plus, Zhengting's my brother," she reminded him because people always seemed to forget. 

"Oh. Zeren," Yibo put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head. "I'm so sorry you have to work with this person."

"Ha. I kind of like her," Zeren replied with a wink that Yibo couldn't see.

"She's so mean and bossy."

"I am not. You're just pig headed and think you know everything."

"Children, please," Zhengting said, grabbing Qiao’s arms that she was gesturing wildly with.

"Yibo, you want some of this kung pao chicken?" Zeren offered, trying to bring some peace.

"Not from her. She'd probably poison me," he responded, turning away childishly while she did the same.

"She wouldn't poison me though," Zeren said as he ate the chicken.

Yibo looked at it curiously. He was hungry. Qiao held out a pair of chopsticks to him and he eyed them suspiciously. He reached out a hand to take them but changed his mind. "I don’t trust you." He stood up suddenly. "You guys can eat. I'm going to practice."

He turned on the music and had barely started the choreography when Qiao jumped to her feet.

"This is my song!" She yelled over the music and pointed an accusing finger at him.

"No, it's not." He stopped dancing to come face her.

"Yes, it is. These are my lyrics and my melody."

"Pfft." He scoffed. "It's significantly different from the one you gave me."

"It's still my song! You said you would never use it! You called it trash."

Zeren and Zhengting both got to their feet, seeing her get angry.

"Well, they made it better." Yibo crossed his arms.

"You!" She started toward him, but Zhengting grabbed her by the waist and Zeren stepped in between them.

"Whatever," she said, breaking free of Zhengting’s grasp. "It's fine. I gave it to you. You can keep it. I just want you to admit that it's mine and you like it."

Yibo stared at her but didn't say anything.

"I like it," Zeren said after an awkward moment of silence had passed. "Do you want to see our routine?" He offered. 

She waited another moment for Yibo to say something, but he didn’t. 

"I'll wait for the video," she said and picked up her food to leave. Zhengting followed her quickly out. 

"Is it her song?" Zeren asked when they had gone.

"Yeah, she gave it to me about six months ago. I didn't like it at the time, but they made some adjustments to the music and I decided to do it as a solo."

"Why not just tell her that?" Zeren wondered.

"And make her head even bigger? She's smug enough already," Yibo argued.

"Hm. I don't know what it was like in Seoul, but I think you've got her all wrong," Zeren told him thoughtfully. 

"Don't tell her what I said," Yibo pleaded.

"Oh, sorry, bro, but I have to tell her," Zeren said apologetically, but also laughing a little.

"Why?"

"Because we live together, and I'd rather see her smug than mad," he reasoned.

"Oh my god, you like her don't you?" Yibo shook his head. Zeren didn't answer. "Man, don't fall for her. She's such a flirt."

Zeren knew this to be true, but he didn't think she meant to do intentionally. Knowing her brother beforehand, he knew this was just a personality trait they shared. And besides, he knew their feelings for each other were genuine. He shook off the comment and encouraged the other boy to get back to work.

Several hours later they finally had a complete routine and called it quits. Zeren said goodbye to Yibo and went in search of his roommates. He found Qiao alone in the control room while Zhengting and Chengcheng were bickering in the live room. Since no one else was around he dared to kiss her on the cheek.

"What are they arguing about?" Zeren wondered, sitting in the chair beside her. 

"I don't know. I lost interest about ten minutes ago." She shrugged. "Chengcheng is finding flaws where there are none and I think we need to take him home and make him eat."

Zeren laughed. "You ready then?"

She nodded and pressed the button on the mic to talk to the boys in the live room. "Hey guys," she said, but they didn't hear her. She knocked on the glass and they stopped to stare at her with shocked expressions, like caged animals. She tried again. "Let's call it a day boys. Try it with fresh ears tomorrow." They agreed. "And full stomachs. Remind me never to come to the studio with Chengcheng without feeding him breakfast."

Zeren could tell she had a rough day with the two of them and wished he could help. Before they walked out of the studio he pulled her into a firm hug and she sighed in relief.   
"Thank you," she said against his shoulder in a weary voice that sounded like she might burst into tears. "You're just what I needed."

"Come on," he told her, resisting the instinct to hold her hand. "Let's go home, so I can comfort you properly." He had to put his hands in his pockets to avoid touching her as they walked down the hall and out to the car. 

"Hey," Zeren called out to Qiao as she almost walked past his room. He had been waiting for her while she cleaned up after dinner, which she had refused his help with. She stopped outside his door. "What are you doing?" he asked, wishing she would come in.

"I'm tired. I'm gonna go lay down," she told him. 

"Why not come lay down with me?" He scooted over on his bed to show there was room for her. Without a word she walked over to the bed. "Close the door," he reminded her quietly. She turned back and closed it softly and then climbed onto the bed and into his waiting arms, her back to his chest. He brought her in close and nuzzled her neck, but he couldn't help feeling something was wrong.

"I feel like you've been avoiding me the last few days," he broke the silence.

"What are you talking about? We've been together a lot." She'd watched him dance and danced with him. They'd binge watched One Piece and even played some video games. 

"I just mean, you haven't been as...affectionate lately." It was difficult to say, but he'd been thinking about it for more than a day and he had to get it off his chest. "Are you already bored with me?"

She turned around quickly to face him. "Baby, no!" she said kindly, with a hand to his cheek. "I'm not. I'm just scared of crossing a line again," she frowned.

"You mean because of the other night?"

She nodded, avoiding his eyes. He put his finger under her chin to lift her gaze up to his. "I like it when you cross the line. If you don't cross them, I won't know where they are and when to move them."

She sighed. "I don't like feeling like the aggressor. I feel like I always initiate things."

He pursed his lips, stuck in a dilemma. "But I love that about you. I like it when you're forward. I'm sorry for being so shy."

"Don't be sorry," she told him. "I don’t want to go too fast. I'm afraid of what you'll think of me if I go on like that. It's hard to know what you want from me."

He looked into her eyes, searching for words to express himself but finding none, so instead he just kissed her, hard and without letting go for a long time. He pulled her under him so he could lay every inch of his body against her. She wrapped her legs around him and he rubbed his pelvis against her, letting himself get hard and not pulling away like he normally would have. She held him tight to her as he kissed and sucked on her neck. He rubbed himself against her until he felt he might cum and suddenly rolled off her to lay at her side, both panting heavily. 

When he finally caught his breath he rolled onto his side to face her. "Zhu Zhengqiao, I want absolutely everything from you. Just not all at once. And I could never think badly of you.” She didn’t respond until he let out a little laugh at something in his head. 

“What?” she wondered. The sound made her smile.

“Nothing, just something Yibo said earlier.”

“Ugh. Yibo.” He laughed at her reaction. “What did he say?” He hesitated to tell her. “What?” she demanded. 

“Uh. He guessed that I liked you and he said I shouldn’t fall for you because you were just a flirt,” he laughed. 

Her mouth fell open in a look of shock and disgust. “Freaking Yibo,” she muttered. “How dare he?”

“Well, you are kind of a flirt,” he replied, hoping for another cute expression, which she delivered, similar to the previous one but slightly less angry. She was about to deny it, but didn’t. 

“I’m not that bad.”

“Eh. I like it.”

“You think I flirt with everyone?” she asked, scrunching up her face. 

“I don’t think you try to flirt with everyone. I think you’re just very friendly,” he smiled, but her expression deepened. He tried to smooth out the line between her eyebrows with his thumb. “Don’t worry about it. It’s just stupid Yibo,” he said, hoping for a smile, which he received, plus a kiss. “Although…” he started. 

“What?”

“I was wondering why he would say that. If maybe you and he…” he didn’t even know how to finish the thought. 

“I would _never_ do _anything_ with Yibo.” He really got a kick out of the disgusted tone she used whenever she said his name. “Although, I did have a brief flirtation with Wenhan, but there was no real connection between us.”

“Wenhan?” Zeren asked, slightly bewildered. 

“Yeah, but it was nothing,” she reiterated. She didn’t like the look in his eyes. She put her hands on his cheeks. “Hey. Nothing I’ve ever felt for anyone before compares with how I feel for you. There’s a reason all of those guys are in the past and you’re here now.” He smiled and kissed her, taking her at her word. 

“I know I’m not as experienced as you,” he said when he broke the kiss. “But I hope you can be patient with me. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

She sighed. “Just how experienced do you think I am?” she wondered, imagining he had jumped to the same conclusion Zhengting had.

“Um,” he didn’t know how to answer, and he sensed he had said the wrong thing. 

“God, does everyone think I’m super easy?” she groaned, rolling away from him and off the bed.

“No, no, no! Oh, god, babe, I really didn’t mean it like that. I guess I just thought, you’re so beautiful, and you’ve had boyfriends. I guess I thought maybe in college or something. I’m sorry. Please don’t be offended.” He took her hand and kissed it. “I didn’t mean anything by it. I certainly wasn’t looking down on you. I swear.”

“I know it seems like I’ve dated a lot, but it really isn’t that much. I may be a little overly romantic, but I want to be with someone who loves and respects me. I’ve waited for that. So far I’ve been nothing but disappointed,” she sighed and turned to leave, but he put himself in front of her. 

“Qiao, please. I’m sorry. I do love you, and I hope you know how much I respect you. I’m not saying that so you’ll sleep with me, either. But I want you to know it’s true. It’s never mattered to me if you have or you haven’t. But if we ever get there someday, when we’re both ready, I’m glad we’ll get to have our first time together. I mean I hope. I mean...Ugh! I don’t know how to respectfully say that I really want to have sex with you, but not yet, but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t on my mind like all the time-” He only stopped his rambling at the sound of her laughter. “Are you laughing at me?”

“Yes, but only because you’re so cute,” she said, covering her mouth. He turned bright red. “Zeren, I hope we can have that experience together, too. Let’s just take it as it comes okay? We still have a lot to learn together, I promise.” She held his gaze for a moment and he started to return to his normal color. “But just so you know, I want my first time to be romantic,” she told him, and he committed it to memory.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty short compared with the others, but I promise the next one will be very long, and hopefully worth it.

"How long are you going to be gone for?" Qiao asked as she sat on Zeren's bed while he packed the night before leaving. 

"Eleven days." He had counted precisely. 

"I won't be back until after our performance in Shanghai."

She pouted. "I'll miss you."

"Me, too," he promised, kissing her pouting lips and making her smile a little. "But it will be good. You can work with Zhengting and Xinchun on some songs."

“Yeah,” she said with no feeling.

“I’m usually pretty excited to get out of here,” he said with a little laughter in his voice. “I’ve never not wanted to leave before.” He zipped up his bag and put it by the door. “Will you sleep with me tonight?” he requested. 

She nodded and motioned for him onto the bed with her so he could hold her. He turned out the light and climbed in. He laid facing her and gave her a sweet kiss on the forehead, then her cheek, then her lips. One kiss became two, became ten, and then sweet kisses became more passionate as he slipped his warm tongue between her lips. He gently caressed her arm and her back. Feeling emboldened in the darkness, he moved his hand under her shirt to feel her smooth, warm skin and slid his hand further up her back until he reached her bra. He stopped.

“Do you normally wear a bra to sleep?” he wondered with a sly smile, although he genuinely thought it seemed uncomfortable.

“Well...no,” she admitted. 

“Do you want to take it off?” he asked. 

“Do _you_ want to take it off?” she replied, laughter in her voice. 

“I just want you to be comfortable.” He smiled as he kissed her again. 

“I’m asking if you want to take it off or if you want me to take it off,” she clarified with another laugh.

“Oh. Well...I…” he was suddenly flustered. 

Deciding to end the debate she quickly reached behind her and unhooked her bra, wiggled her way out of the straps and pulled it out of her sleeve in a few seconds. 

“Wow,” he said, genuinely impressed. “How did you do that?”

“Literally all girls can do that,” she told him as she threw it on the floor. “Are you satisfied now?” she smiled

“I didn’t...I wasn’t...You didn’t have to...You didn’t even take your shirt off.” She couldn’t see his face but she imagined he wore a very confused expression. 

“Did you want me to?”

“No. That’s not what I meant.”

“What do you want?” she laughed. He wasn’t even touching her anymore and she wondered if she’d made things weird. 

“I don’t even know. I got lost somewhere.”

She giggled a little and kissed him, hoping he could find the plot again. He did. His hand nervously found her breast over her shirt, rubbing it tenderly for the first time, before he finally plucked up the courage to reach under her shirt again. He squeezed her left boob gently and rubbed her nipple with his thumb, making her moan quietly. She could feel him get very hard as he filled the space between their bodies. She reached down to rub his erection over his sweats. His hand froze. 

“Qiao,” he breathed raggedly. 

“Shh. I promise I won’t go too far,” she whispered as she continued to move her hand firmly over his bulge. He relaxed a little and turned his attention to kissing her neck and nibbling at her ear. She somehow knew just when to stop, and didn’t push his boundaries any further. When they did stop, Zeren felt too excited to sleep, but knew if they continued he would regret it. As he held her quietly in the darkness he focused on matching his breathing with her and they both drifted off. 

In the morning they shared several goodbye kisses before he finally left. She knew deep down that it was probably a good thing he was leaving for a bit. All relationships need some space, and with their current living situation they had had almost none at all. But they were still in that early stage where you want to spend all your time with the other person and get to know more about them, so she was going to miss him. 

Zhengting hung his arm over her shoulder. “I guess we’ll both be missing our boys now.”

“Yeah,” she sighed. 

“Want to go to their room and miss them together?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” she replied and put her head on his shoulder as they walked slowly to the bedroom. 

Qiao laid down on Zeren’s bed and held his pillow. Zhengting picked up one of Wenjun’s yoyos and tried out a few tricks the master had taught him, but he was out of practice. 

“How is Wenjun anyway?” Qiao asked as she watched her brother struggle with the toy. 

Zhengting sighed and put it back on top of the dresser. “He’s fine. Working hard. Always working.” He laid flat on Wenjun’s bed. 

“How are things between you two?” she dared to ask. 

“We’re good. We talk whenever we can. I just miss being with him. I agreed to film a show with him this summer just so we can actually spend some time together.”

“What?! You didn’t tell me you were doing a drama!” Qiao popped up to a sitting position. 

“I guess it slipped my mind. I’m mostly doing it for him,” Zhengting admitted. 

“He really loves acting. And he’s very good at it.”

“I know. But sometimes I wished he loved it a little less,” he said sadly. 

“Why?”

“Because then he wouldn’t be gone so much, and he wouldn’t want to quit the band,” Zhengting pouted. 

“I don’t think he really wants to quit the band,” she told her brother to his surprise.

“You don’t?” Zhengting turned over on his side to look at her. 

“I think he just gets restless with it sometimes. I hope working on new stuff will get his interest,” she admitted. “But I don’t think he’ll give up acting either. Can you love him either way?”

Zhengting sighed. “I don’t care what he does, honestly, I’ll love him no matter what. I just wish I could be with him. We’ve been together for over a year, but we’ve been apart for most of it. You’ll understand soon.”

She frowned. “Don’t say that.”

“Sorry. Maybe not. Zeren isn’t quite as all over the place as the rest of us.” She hoped he was right. 

“Well, you should probably tell Wenjun so he can stop torturing himself. But, at least I know what kind of song we can write,” she smiled sadly at him. 

“I know what will make us feel better,” Zhengting said, springing up from the bed. 

“What?”

“Facials!” he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her to the bathroom.

Qiao threw herself into work like Zeren had suggested. She spent several long days working in the studio, perfecting every note and beat of Zeren’s song so it would be ready to record the guys’ vocals when they all returned from Shanghai. She also worked with Yu Ming to make some improvements to Chengcheng’s song as well. Meanwhile Zhengting was trying to write lyrics about his relationship with Wenjun and how much he missed him without making it seem obvious, but he wasn’t as good with words as his sister, and the whole process was making him miss his boyfriend even more so she stepped in to help. She wished that being so busy made her miss him less, but it didn’t, and she tried to draw on that for inspiration. 

She was in the living room working on a song on Zeren’s guitar one day when Xinchun came home. He sat down to listen to her. 

“Who would you write a song for, Xinchun?” she asked after a little while. 

He thought about her question for a moment. “If I were to write a song for someone, I’d write it for my mom,” he said shyly.

“Why for your mom?” she asked, thinking his answer was sweet.

“Because she’s a great mom. She made a lot of sacrifices for me so I could pursue this dream. I’m sure it isn’t what she wanted for me, but she still supports me.” He wore a fond smile.

“Your mom is a very nice woman, and I’m sure she’s very proud of you,” she assured him. 

“Sometimes I wish I could just be her son again, like a regular boy. I still feel very young sometimes,” he admitted. “I wish I had more time with her.”

“I bet this would make a really sweet song,” she told him, and his smile spread. She encouraged him to write down anything thoughts or memories he had about her and their relationship. When they met up the next day to talk about it the other boys joined in, and added their own thoughts while Qiao wrote them all down and began to synthesize it into poetry. 

“You’re a machine, meimei,” Zhengting told her, impressed with her ability to crank out songs. 

She shrugged. “You guys have a lot going on you don’t know how to express. All I’m doing is putting it into words. It’s not that big of a deal.” 

Her brother just rolled his eyes. “Take a compliment.”

She blushed. Her phone beeped with a notification from Douyin. Zeren had posted a video of him doing the hand choreography he had created for the song “Heart Full of You” almost two years earlier. The caption said “For some reason this song has been on my mind recently.”

“You miss him,” Zhengting said, after he watched the video over her shoulder. 

“Of course,” she replied, holding her phone to her chest. 

“Why don’t you come to Shanghai with us? You can see him sooner,” he told her, sitting down beside her. 

“Doesn’t that seem a little desperate?” she wondered. 

“You’re already his girlfriend, and he’s totally crazy about you,” Xinchun chimed in. “Nothing could make you seem desperate.”

“Plus you’ve never seen us perform live!” Quanzhe added. 

“I’ll get you a plane ticket,” Zhengting decided, pulling out his phone. 

“Okay,” she agreed. “I’m gonna go call him.” She ran off to his room. 

“Aw, crap,” Zhengting sighed. 

“What?” Chengcheng asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“Um, nothing,” he responded. He’d just realized that now Qiao would be in his hotel room. 

“Hey, baby,” Zeren said when he answered the phone. He didn’t sound as happy as he had looked on the video. 

“Hey! Is everything okay?” she asked as she laid down on his bed. 

“Yeah. Why?” 

“You sound kind of down,” she told him.

“Oh. It’s nothing, really,” he said unconvincingly. 

“If something’s bothering you, you can tell me. Is it something I did?”

“No. Nothing like that,” he assured her. 

“Is it the video?” she wondered, 

There was a long pause. 

“Is it _Yibo_?” she asked acerbically, and he couldn’t help but laugh a little. 

“Yeah,” he admitted reluctantly. 

“What did he do?” She sounded like she was ready to go beat him up. “Is he bullying you?”

“No. He didn’t do anything in particular. It’s just...he’s very good and I guess I don’t like feeling inferior to him. And you’re right. He’s very arrogant. He’s a better dancer than me, and I just really want to improve,” he sighed. 

“No,” she said flatly.

“No what?”

“No. He’s not a better dancer than you. He’s just not. You are the best dancer. Yibo is good for whatever alien life form he comes from, but he’s not better than you. No one is.” She simply refused to entertain the idea.

He laughed a little. “I’m pretty sure he’s human.”

“Oh, maybe you’re right. Maybe you’re the alien lifeform. Like, sometimes it seems you don’t have bones, or something. Like your body is made from some super bendy material. But I mean, in a really freaking sexy way,” she smiled. 

He couldn’t contain his laughter now. “I still think I need to be working harder, challenging myself more. I want to improve,” he said when he’d regained his composure. 

She sighed. “I’ve been holding you back. When you get home you should work harder. Stop wasting your practice time with an amateur like me.”

“That’s not a waste of time,” he told her, a little sad she would think so. 

“Don’t get me wrong, _I_ don't think so. I love it. But, don’t let me be a distraction. I won’t forgive myself for holding you back.” She grabbed one of his pillows and held it tightly. 

“You don’t,” he assured her. “How’s your work going?” he wondered.

“It’s going pretty well. Got a couple new songs on the way. I think you’ll really like how ours is coming along,” she smiled.

“I know I will.”

“I miss you,” she said after a brief pause.

“I miss you, too,” he replied. 

“I’m going to go to Shanghai to watch you guys perform,” she told him. 

“Really?” She was happy to hear the excitement in his voice. 

“Really. Zhengting is getting me a ticket already.”

“I can’t wait to see you,” he smiled and she could feel it. 

“Just a couple more days,” she sighed. “I should let you get some rest.”

“Okay,” he said a little reluctantly. "Thanks for cheering me up."

“Sleep well. I love you,” she grinned. 

“I love you, too,” he smiled back. 

He couldn’t see it, but the reason he had been getting his ass kicked by Yibo in rehearsals and filming was that he was missing her, and to be honest he was a little frustrated. A distracted Zeren was still one of the best dancers around, but Yibo was taking advantage of the loss of the younger man’s edge to show him up. Zeren couldn’t seem to stop thinking about her lips, her hands and her soft skin. They’d been talking every night and texting during the day, but he missed her body, and when he heard she was coming to see him earlier than expected he was overcome with excitement and desire. 

The following morning Zeren received a wechat message from Zhengting.

ZZT: Didi, we need to talk about Qiao.  
DZR: okay. Why is Wenjun here?  
ZZT: Wenjun is like her second brother. He wants to protect and help her just as much as I do.  
DZR: Oh. I hope you know I would never hurt her.  
BWJ: Ren-ge, we know you're a soft bunny. 🐇 We're not worried about that.  
DZR: lol. So what's up?  
BWJ: We need the have "the talk"  
DZR: Do we? 🤔  
ZZT: Yes. You need to know what you're getting into.  
DZR: idk guys. This seems a little weird. 😳  
BWJ: We know you're thinking about it.  
DZR: ...welllll  
ZZT: But like Jun said, 🐰  
BWJ: So if you have any questions you can come to us. As your geges  
DZR: Oh um I didn't think you guys...would be able to help  
ZZT: The principles of love are the same  
BWJ: And most importantly we want to give you support and encourage you to take that next step.  
DZR: Um...idk if we're ready for that yet.  
BWJ: I know it's difficult at home.  
DZR: Well that's true but that's not the only reason  
ZZT: So maybe you should think about Shanghai.  
DZR: That's pretty soon  
ZZT: Don't you ❤ her?  
DZR: Very much but…  
ZZT: You guy should just get a room together and see what happens  
DZR: You want us to share a room?  
DZR: Wait, you want to switch rooms. 🤦♂️  
BWJ: Yes  
ZZT: Yes  
DZR: Why didn't you just say that instead of making it weird? You know i don't mind doing that.  
I got you.👍🏼  
BWJ: Well, we really are here for you. And you really should go for it!  
ZZT: But you need to treat her right!  
And be romantic.  
And basically we don't think you can do this on your own.  
DZR: Wow. Such a lack of faith.  
ZZT: 🐇🐇🐇  
DZR: ...you know what rabbits are known for, right?  
BWJ: LOOOOOOOOOL  
DZR: Actually I may have a idea...  
ZZT: YESSSS  
DZR: Don't you feel the least bit weird about this?  
ZZT: Qiao and I don't really have what you call "boundaries"  
DZR: She doesn't know you’re talking to me about this, does she?  
ZZT: Of course not. She'd kill me. This is our little secret….so tell us your plan!


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: explicit content ahead
> 
> Communication and consent are my kinks. So sue me.  
> By the way, did you wonder what Qiao's tattoo was? Read on to find out!

Qiao followed the sound of Wenjun and Zhengting laughing into the hotel room. "This is Wenjun's bag. Where's my stuff?" She asked.

"Our room is next door. Here's a key." Zhengting handed her a key card with a smile.

"Okay. I'm going to take a shower," she said and went to their room. She heard the door open and close several times while she was in the shower and she swore she could hear both of them laughing. She was alone again though by the time she turned off the water. She wrapped herself in a nice fluffy hotel towel and went out to get her clothes, passing the door just as it was opened by Zeren. His eyes suddenly widened.

"Oh my god!" Justin screamed from the hallway where he had been right behind Zeren and ran away laughing.

"Close the door!" Qiao shouted, turning away, against the wall. 

Zeren came in and closed the door.

"Not with you in here!" She yelled and ran back into the bathroom. 

All he could do was laugh. He didn't want to leave.

"What are you doing in here? Your room is next door!" she said through the crack in the door.

He looked down at the envelope with the keycard he had been handed. "Um, nope. This is my room. Why are you here?" 

"I--ooooh, Zhengting and Wenjun are so sneaky. Those bastards," she said under her breath. "They're playing a joke on us."

"I like it. It's a good one," he smiled.

"I need to get dressed," she said, implying he should leave.

"Okay," was his reply, but he didn't move from his spot outside the bathroom door. When she didn't move either he pushed the door gently open. "Are you going to come out?"

"Zeren, I'm naked," she told him, as if it weren't obvious.

"Yes, I can see that." He didn't know what had come over him, but he didn't feel shy about her condition like he once would have. In fact, he thought she wasn't quite naked enough, what with the towel covering the truly scandalous parts of her body. He walked up to the threshold of the bathroom and brushed a wet strand of hair off her shoulder, his fingers caressing her wet skin. "I don't mind."

She looked up at him, suddenly completely disoriented by his presence and the simple action he had just taken. Then she paused. "Your hair is black," she said in surprise. 

"Yeah, they dyed it yesterday. Do you like it?" He flipped his hair and ran his fingers through it.

"I love it. Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, pouting for no good reason.

"I wanted to surprise you."

"I feel like there have already been too many surprises for today," she sighed, still feeling anxious and self-conscious that she was only wearing a towel.

"I like this surprise," he said, running his finger tips down her arm. “I really like it.” He leaned down to kiss her but she pulled away.

"Zeren! Get out so I can get dressed."

"You can't get dressed with me here?" He wondered. "I promise I won't say anything. I'll just watch." He winked at her. He really didn't know what had come over him other than that he had really missed her and she was even more beautiful in person than in his memory. For some reason his normally shy behavior was taken over by a desire to seduce her and his self control that he usually worked so hard to maintain, especially with her, seemed to be at an all-time low.

She hit him in the shoulder and walked past him. She would just change in the bathroom. As she walked by he could see the hint of her tattoo under the towel. 

He cleared his throat. "I will leave, if you show me your tattoo," he said as she pulled clothes out of her suitcase.

She turned back to go into the bathroom. "That's okay. I'll just change in here."

Zeren stood in the doorway, spreading out his arms so she couldn't get past him again. 

"Not until you show me." He bit his lip.

"What has gotten into you?" She wondered suspiciously. 

"I honestly don't know," he replied. "But I really want to see it," he begged.

She sighed and considered it for a minute. She had truly been dreading this moment even though she knew it would always come. She just had no idea how he would take it. Finally she turned around and after a deep breath lowered the towel just enough for him to see. 

His jaw dropped. On her back, slightly to the left of her spine were the words "Open Your 爱" inside the outline of a heart. 

"You really are a DBABY," he said with a smile. He reached out to touch it and she jumped.

"Is it totally weird? Does it freak you out?" She wondered as she pulled the towel tightly around her again before turning around to look at him. 

"When did you get it?" He asked. An odd question she thought.

"A little over a year ago." She felt a chill down her spine and started to feel cold standing there in her towel.

"I really have been your bias this whole time." He was mystified. He took a step toward her and she took a step back until she ran into the mini-fridge. 

"I told you that." Her voice shook, surprised by his behavior that was getting more and more aggressive, not in a threatening way, but outside the norm. For a moment her mind slipped into a fantasy she was sure wouldn't happen on a normal day. 

"I thought you were just being nice," he admitted. He took her head in his hands and looked down into her eyes. "Do you love me?" he wondered, even though she had said it before.

"You know I do," she responded quietly.

"But do you love me as your idol or do you love me?" 

"I love you, Zeren," she said decisively. "I've fallen for you twice now."

He smiled. "I love you, too," he replied. He leaned down and kissed her, but she pulled away. 

"Zeren, I'm still naked. So unless you want to join me, I think you should leave." She really just wanted to rip all his clothes off but she was trying to control herself.

He laughed, thinking about the tightness in his jeans, and the fact that she could probably feel his hard on pressed against her. "You don't know how tempting that is." She did. "But I'll go, because I said I would, and we can just save that for later." He wiped his bottom lip and exited the door. 

She wondered what he meant by "later." Later as in tonight? Later as in next month? It was vague, but she got the feeling he had meant somewhere closer to the former. She started to feel very nervous and her mouth got dry. She quickly picked up her clothes and got dressed. 

The boys were to go to the venue and rehearse on the stage for the following night's performance, and she went along with them. Even as they took the van to the location, the two of them sat in the back, she could barely look at him. He was still thinking about the glistening of the water droplets on her skin as she stood nervously in their hotel room and the heart-shaped tattoo with his song that was forever inked into her skin. Her devotion to him must have been longer and deeper than he realized and the revelation made him happy and horny all at the same time. Well, he’d been horny for weeks now, and he’d spent many nights in his various hotel rooms while he was gone with his laptop balanced on his chest and his dick in his hands. And then when he’d seen her for the first time in weeks she was naked, and wet, and perfect.

Qiao on the other hand was slowly becoming a nervous wreck. She wasn't quite sure why, but she felt as if there was some plot afoot. She wasn't sure who was behind it and that bothered her deeply. Was it her brother and her best friend pushing them into the same bedroom? Or was it Zeren who had worked out the switch-eroo and was planning to seduce her while they were in Shanghai? She wanted to make love to him. She had no doubt about that, or the fact that she loved him. But were they both ready? Deep down what she was feeling was self-consciousness. She wasn't sure she'd be good enough. He had suddenly seemed so self-confident that afternoon and she couldn't help but wonder about the change.

Zeren watched her worried expression the whole way to the venue, holding her hand gently while she chewed on the nails of the other. He could tell she was stuck deep inside her head and he wanted to pull her out. 

"Is everything okay?" he whispered in her ear, making her jump. 

"Huh?" She looked at him with wide eyes, surprised he was talking to her.

"You look worried," he said quietly. 

She couldn't talk about it in the van, so she just said, "I'm fine," and hoped he'd drop it. 

He did, guessing it wasn't the time or place, but he started to worry he had crossed a line earlier. He didn't know if he should or could walk it back, and he didn't know quite how to apologize for it, so he kept quiet. He kissed her temple and leaned his head on top of hers, making her smile a little in spite of her worries.

She watched from the audience seats with the staff while they practiced. Zeren was the driving force behind the rehearsal. He wasn't pleased with the limited amount of time they had to prepare for the next night's live television performance, but this was one of the consequences of their unsynchronized schedules. Overall they didn't look horrible, and Wenjun was always a lost cause anyway, so as long as he remembered all the steps that was fine. Every time Zeren looked out at the audience he found Qiao looking back at him, like she never took her eyes off him, watching every movement, and he got a great deal of satisfaction and confidence from that. She was watching him like that, because it was her favorite sight in the world. She loved to watch his expressions and the way his hips moved and she thought about the way his abs must have flexed underneath his t-shirt. After a couple hours they were told their time was up and another group needed the stage for rehearsal. Zeren could have stayed all night, but he let it go, thinking there was, at that time, one other thing he'd rather do.

On the bus back to the hotel Qiao was still stressed, but made an effort to be engaged in the conversation of the others. It was the first time they had all seven been together in a month and she enjoyed listening to them laugh and bully each other. At the hotel the staff had prepared a dinner for all of them together in a private dining room, but Wenjun and Zhengting were conspicuously absent. Qiao barely ate at all, her appetite completely lost to her feelings and worries. She thought the two of them being gone was awfully suspicious. Since the staff was all around and Justin was there, the couple were careful not to touch each other or speak too intimately, but she really wanted to feel his touch, and the feeling of having missed him for the last couple weeks was finally catching up and overshadowing the anxiety she was feeling. 

Finally, Zeren looked at his phone and then leaned over and whispered to her. "Go wait for me by the elevator."

She wrinkled her eyebrows at him, but smiled and obeyed. He tried not to watch her leave and left a minute after she did, after thanking the crew. When he got to her he pushed the button for the elevator and then looked around before taking her hand and pulling her inside when the doors opened. When the doors closed he pulled her into a hug and smelled her hair. 

"I've been wanting to hug you all day," he told her quietly. 

She hugged him back and suddenly a lot of the tension she'd been carrying around melted away. "I've been wanting to hug you all week."

"It's not a contest," he said, squeezing her tighter. 

"It could be." She squeezed him until his back cracked and they both laughed. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, that actually feels better now," he smiled.

She reached up to brush his hair out of his face. "I actually really love the black. It may be my favorite."

"Thanks. I like it, too." She watched him, smiling fondly, while he messed with it in the reflective walls of the elevator until it dinged to signal they were on their floor. He took her hand again but looked out into the hallway before stepping out. All clear. He took her to the room and opened the door for her, letting her step in first. 

All around the room were candles and rose petals. 

She gasped, covering her mouth with her hands. "I knew there was a plot," she grinned at him after he closed the door. There was a red bag on her bed next to her suitcase and she rushed over to look inside. He followed closely behind.

"I know this is pretty cheesy, but you did say you wanted your first time to be romantic, and I'm hoping this fits the criteria."

"Did you do all of this?" She asked, without turning around.

"Well, technically Wenjun and Zhengting did the physical work, but it was my plan," he admitted.

"Was this also your plan?" She turned around and showed him the lacy bra that matched the panties in the bag.

He turned red. "That was not me," he swore. "Although, maybe I should thank whoever it was."

"You planned all this because you want to have sex with me tonight?" She asked plainly, in a quiet voice.

"I do," he admitted, looking down at her softly.

"What if I'm not ready?" She asked, not taking her eyes off of him.

"Then we'll clean all this up, order some dessert from room service and watch a movie," he replied, taking her in his arms. 

"What if I am ready?" She smiled.

"Then I should tell you that I'm nervous, but I've wanted to do this with you for a long time, and I'm ready." He smiled back at her and kissed her forehead. "It's whatever you want. Lingerie totally optional."

"What if we ordered dessert, had sex and then watched a movie?" she suggested. 

"You're a genius." They both laughed a little. 

She grabbed the bag off the bed. "Just give me a minute to think," she said and retreated into the bathroom. 

He wasn't sure which way she was going to come out on this, but he truly felt like it was fine either way. She was sure she was ready, although her heart was racing. She got out of her clothes and tried on the lingerie, just to see how she felt about it. The matching set was lacy and red, and she thought it rather flattering, although she had to pop up on her toes to get a full view in the mirror. She liked it, even though she thought it a suspicious gift. She looked in the bag to see if there were any clues as to who left it, but there weren't so she just had to assume it was both of them trying to be funny. She decided to wear it anyway, but pulled on her skinny jeans and t-shirt over it. She splashed some water on her face, hoping to calm her nerves and then went back out. Zeren had taken off his shoes and jacket but was still wearing his classic ripped black jeans and a button down shirt. He had put on some soft music. He hadn't actually thought she would come out in the lingerie, but it would've been a great indicator of what to expect. Still, he smiled at her gently as she came toward him. 

"What do you want?" He asked, hoping it didn't sound demanding. 

"You," she said and pulled him to the bed. She didn't know quite how to begin, but she knew they couldn't just go at it, so she wanted him to hold her on the bed for a bit and let things build naturally. They laid facing each other, their hands well behaved and held gently between them. 

"Can we just talk for a bit?" She asked. 

"Sure. What do you want to talk about?"

"Mm" she bit her lip, and he couldn't help thinking about how he wanted to bite it. "I was wondering what you really thought of my tattoo," she said, blushing a little because she had been so afraid to show it to him. 

He smiled and put his hand on the spot and pulled her closer. "Are you kidding? I love it."

"It's not weird that you were my bias before we met?"

"I'll admit it's a little weird to be dating a fan, but I also think it's weird that I have fans at all. And I would hope that my girlfriend would be a fan. So why should it bother me?" He shrugged.

"You know there are a lot of other DBABIES out there who are just as devoted as me," she told him.

"Do you want to bring one of them in here with us?" He teased.

She punched him gently in the chest. "Don't tease me," she pouted.

"They only love Zeren that they see on the stage and in pictures. You love Ding Zeren that obsesses in the studio and doesn't know how to express his feelings. And most importantly, I love you. So that's all that matters to me."  
“You forgot that I also love how big a dork you are,” she smiled. She stretched out her head and her lips to kiss him and he gladly moved in closer to kiss her back. Sweet soft kisses at first, and then he moved his hand to grasp her neck and she held onto his hip as the kiss deepend and her tongue slipped into his mouth. He rolled over onto his back so she could be on top of him. He liked the pressure of her thighs against his hips as she pressed down on him with her hands flat against his chest and he got hard as he drifted his hands over her curves and grabbed onto her ass, making her giggle. He had been fantasizing about her body the whole time he was gone and she felt so good in his hands.  
Qiao's lips moved from his, across his chin and over to his ear. She nibbled and sucked on it gently and enjoyed the moan he made as she did so. She continued down his neck, not lingering there as much as she would have liked to, afraid of leaving any hickies. The top two buttons of his shirt were undone, exposing flesh she could plant her kisses on. Her fingers cautiously moved to the buttons below, unable to forget the last time she had tried to get a glimpse of his chest and hoping there wouldn't be a repeat. He let her unbutton his shirt all the way down and spread it open. She grinned enormously as she laid eyes on his eight pack for the first time. He laughed and sighed at her expression.

"Is it everything you hoped it would be?" he teased. 

"It's a freaking dream come true," she smiled as she ran her finger tips over each defined muscle. They puffed a little as he laughed. She moved her hands to his sides and she lowered her head to kiss each individual one, and slipped her tongue down the center line before slowly returning northward toward his face, leaving a trail of kisses up his chest. "Do you know you're very sexy?" she asked, kissing his lips again.

He slipped his hands under the back of her shirt and moaned at the feel of her skin. "I'm glad you think so," he breathed. He wanted to feel more of his skin on hers, so he slowly pulled her t-shirt up and gently over her head. Her hair fell down onto his bare chest and tickled a little. All their nerves tingled as the flesh of their stomachs touched. They smiled at each other for the pleasure of it. He ran his hands up her back to the spot where her tattoo was, which was also roughly where her bra was clasped, but he didn't undo it. He merely teased her by running his fingers along the place where the fabric met her skin and she shivered. He flipped her over and knelt between her legs so he could look at her, still wearing her bra. He should remember to thank his friends for that. He slipped his shirt off his shoulders and threw it beside hers.

"My god," he breathed, and ran his fingers lightly down her sides, tickling her and making her laugh. His hands drifted down to the button on her jeans. She covered her face with her hands. 

“Wait!” she said. His hands froze, and she reached one of her own down to grab him and pull him down to her. He landed beside her. “I’m nervous,” she confessed. 

He laughed breathily. “Me, too,” he admitted. 

She opened her eyes and rolled over to rest her head on his chest. “Just stay here for a minute.” He agreed and wrapped his arm around her, holding her tightly to his chest. She could hear his heart beating fast like hers. She let her fingers play across his bare skin and smiled when little goosebumps appeared. “I’m sorry,” she said quietly. 

“Don’t be sorry. I really don’t have any expectations.” He squeezed her tighter. “It’s nice just to hold you here.” 

“Why are you nervous?” she asked to fill the silence. 

He sighed. “You know I’ve never done this before. I’ve only...seen stuff, you know? I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m nervous I won’t...be good at it.” He closed his eyes tight. Talking about it was making it worse. 

“Oh.” She sounded surprised. “I’m not worried about that at all,” she said. He didn’t respond so she went on. “You’re good at everything.”

“I’m really not. You just think that because practice makes perfect.”

“So you’re saying you want to practice?” she smiled slyly. 

“I love practice. I want to spend hours practicing with you,” he smiled, running his hands down her sides. He pulled her on top of her again. 

“I’m down for that,” she hummed, bringing her mouth down to his.

"Why are you nervous?" he asked, wanting to communicate and to be able to comfort her like she did for him. 

“I don’t know. I guess...I’ve just waited a long time. And I’m feeling a little insecure,” she admitted. 

He rolled over so he was on top of her again. “Are you serious?” he asked, his eyes full of surprise. “Have I not told you enough how beautiful you are? If I haven’t, I’m sorry. It’s probably just that I think you’re funny and sweet above all else, but you’re honestly so fucking hot I don’t know what to do with myself. I haven’t been able to think about anything but your body for weeks now. Not seeing you has been killing me.” He ran his hands over her as he talked, just to prove a point. 

“Really?”

“Oh my god, Qiao. Honestly I’ve probably lost a few brain cells jacking off thinking about you.” He laid his forehead against her shoulder as she laughed. “I can’t believe I just said that out loud, but it’s true.”

“Well, you don’t have to anymore,” she said, still laughing and patting his head. 

“Yeah, but I probably will though,” he admitted, making her laugh harder. He brushed the hair off her shoulder and looked her dead in the eyes as she settled. “In all seriousness though, you’re my dream girl, but you’re not a dream. You’re right here beneath me and I promise I’ll do anything to make you feel safe and happy. So if you want to stop, we’ll stop. We can wait, if you’re not ready.”

“I don’t want to stop. I don’t want to wait anymore. I know I’m in good hands,” she smiled and kissed him again. 

He kissed her softly, before latching onto her bottom lip, the one he always watched her bite, grazing his teeth gently across it. His mouth drifted to her neck, where he was not as gentle with her as she had been with him. Qiao dug her fingers into his shoulders while he kissed her vigorously and sucked at the tender flesh of her neck. Slowly he moved down to her chest, and with an upward glance to see her eyes closed with pleasure, he pulled the fabric of her bra aside to reveal a perfect, small nipple. Zeren rubbed it gently between his finger and his thumb while he turned to examine the other one, identical in its perfection, and he slipped out his tongue to tease her, enjoying the sweet moan of surprise that she made. Smoothly, he rolled her over onto her stomach so he could deal with the clasp on her bra. Sad as he would be to see it go, he wanted full access. Before he turned his attention back to her breasts though, he lingered over her tattoo, gently tracing the outline of the heart. She shivered at the light touch. 

“Ever since you appeared, my life has changed,” he sang against her skin and placed a kiss on the spot. 

She wanted to laugh, but it came out as a gasp. He continued to hum the tune as he spread kisses over the curve of her spine. 

“At this moment, my heart is beating only for you, for your perfection,” Zeren sang as he turned her back over, bringing his mouth back to her soft breasts, cupping them gently in his hands. She bucked her hips up at him as he teased her. Her writhing egged him on, drawing him southward. He tried hard not to rush as he laid kisses all the way down her stomach. Once again he brought his hands to the buttons of her jeans, but this time she didn’t stop him. He looked up to her face to see her looking back at him, her eyes dark with desire. She gave him a slight nod and he proceeded to peel her skinny jeans, with her panties, down her legs, toned from weeks of dancing with him. She sighed at the feeling of his warm hands gliding over her skin. The last of her clothes fell to the floor with a light thud, and she felt completely exposed. He drifted his hands back up her legs to her hips. He took his time, feeling her ass and her thighs, completely free and at his disposal for the first time. He settled himself between her thighs. 

“I didn’t know this would be happening today,” she said suddenly, as if she needed to make an excuse for something. 

He hushed her. “You’re perfect, Qiao,” he told her soothingly. He brought his right hand over her warmth, slowly pulling his fingertips over her outer lips, drawing another gasp from her. He slid his middle finger over her slit, her lips parting at the slight pressure. She resisted the urge to snap her legs together. “You’re so wet for me, baby,” he commented happily. 

She sighed. She had been building this moment of her life so much in her head. And it was nothing like she expected. Zeren was sweeter and more caring that she had anticipated, and still she felt anxious. Need for him was filling her up and she felt like she would burst if he didn’t hurry the hell up. But he was enjoying her too much, and he didn’t want it to end too soon. He dipped his finger in her warm, slick juice and teased her lips. She let out a quiet moan. 

“Qiao?” he said softly. 

“Hmm?” she hummed, lost.

“Don’t hold back,” he told her. 

“But they-”

“I don’t care,” he told her as he slid his finger smoothly inside of her. She was already tight, and she tensed a little around his finger. He turned his palm up and bent his finger to touch her most sensitive spot--he’d done some research. After a minute of his gentle stroking she loosened up and he slipped another finger inside of her. Her moans grew a little louder and her back arched off the bed. He looked up at her again, but her arm was covering her eyes. He brought his mouth to her mound and let his tongue slip out tentatively to taste her clit. 

“Tell me what you like, baby,” he whispered to her. She just moaned a higher pitch and raised her hips toward his mouth so he continued. “Does that feel good, baby?”

“So good, daddy,” she said instinctively, surprising both of them. 

“Oh, god, Qiao. I love that. Say it again, baby,” he begged and licked her.

“Oh, fuck, daddy,” she moaned. She ran her fingers into his hair and pushed him exactly where she needed him. After a few minutes she released his hair and tapped him on the shoulder. He looked up to her and she motioned with her finger for him to bring his face up to hers. He obeyed, but left his fingers where they were. 

“What do you want, baby?” he asked in a husky voice. 

She kissed him, tasting herself on his lips. “I wanna feel you,” she said in his ear. 

“I’m not done yet,” he argued. 

“Don’t make me wait,” she pouted. 

Zeren narrowed his eyes at her as he rubbed the heel of his hand gently over her clit. “Fine. But I’ll be back,” he threatened with a smile. Slowly he pulled his fingers from her slit, licking them clean while he looked at her. He stood from the bed and started to unbutton his own pants. He paused. 

“What?” she asked. 

“Uh, there’s no way for me to ask this that’s not awkward,” he started. She sat up to look at him. “I have condoms, but are you…”

Qiao smiled as she rose to her knees and scooted to the edge of the bed. She grabbed the waistband of his jeans and pulled him to her. “I’ve got it taken care of,” she assured him before bringing his face to hers. She kissed him while she unzipped him and pushed his pants down until they fell to the floor. She grabbed him by the hips and pulled him back on the bed with her. He followed willingly. She positioned herself beneath him and brought him down on top of her. His nerves electrified as he cock touched her flesh for the first time. Before he had time to process it, her hand was on him, stroking him. He hadn’t imagined it would feel so incredible to be touched by another person. She wrapped her other arm over his shoulders, pressing him to her body. He could feel himself at her entrance. He pulled his face back an inch to look at her, meeting her eyes. 

“Are you sure,” he asked, needing one last confirmation. 

“I am. Are you?” She smiled. 

He laughed at the ridiculousness of her question. “Yes,” he smiled and pushed slowly into her. 

They both closed their eyes as they enjoyed the feel of the other, and he found his rhythm. It was unlike any dance he’d ever done before except in the fact that it felt instinctual and natural. He didn’t have to wonder what moves to make or how to hold her. They blended perfectly into one another and experienced ecstasy together, flowing into each other just like they did in almost everything else. She opened her eyes to him looking tenderly at her. He took one of her hands in his and intertwined their fingers as he thrusted gently in and out of her until he came. 

Afterward he didn’t move right away, but held her there and leaned his forehead against her, giving her soft kisses. He couldn’t choose any words to say, so he just held her and she was happy enough with that, unable to do anything but smile. 

“You’re a miracle,” he said when he’d collected himself, making her giggle. “I didn’t hurt you?” She shook her head, although it had hurt a little, but she hadn’t minded. 

They laid side by side, back in the same position they were in what seemed like hours ago, although it had probably been one. “I love you,” she said in a relaxed, happy voice that sounded like music to his ears. 

“I love you, too,” he smiled and kissed her gently. 

“Do you want to order dessert now?” she asked suddenly. 

“Are you hungry?” he asked. She nodded enthusiastically

He grabbed a room service menu and they ordered a chocolate cake a la mode. They did mundane things while they waited like using the bathroom and putting on the fluffy hotel robes. 

By the time their order came they were just cuddling on the bed, listening to music. Zeren got up to answer the door and caught a glimpse of Chengcheng walking down the hall to his room as he received the tray. He wasn’t sure if Chengcheng had seen him, but he was sure he heard laughter before the sound of a door opening. 

He took the tray back to the bed and presented the cake to her, causing her eyes to light up. They happily ate, both feeling elated and relaxed and enjoying each other’s company. At the end there was only a little bit of icing left. She scooped some of it up with her finger and smeared it onto his round little nose. He stared at her, shocked, until she leaned forward and licked it off, giggling. He took a larger amount and smeared on her cheek before pinning her down on the bed and devouring her face while she squealed with laughter. They heard the volume on the TV next door turn up higher and laughed harder until she couldn’t breath. He moved the tray off the bed while she lay there panting, trying to replenish her lungs. 

“Tonight has been perfect,” she told him as he came back to lay partially on top of her. She clasped her hands around his neck. 

“It doesn’t have to be over yet,” he replied, smiling. 

“Oh? You wanna keep practicing?” she smiled back. 

“I could practice all night long.” His eyes flashed. 

“Mmm, well if I recall you had some unfinished business,” she grinned, glancing down. 

Zeren’s smile stretched wider as he dipped down to kiss her collarbone. He untied her robe and pushed it aside as his lips drifted down to her nipples, soft but hardening quickly under his touch. He lingered for a couple of minutes, enjoying her quiet moans, before wandering down to her hips. He grabbed them, pressing them firmly into the mattress as he settled himself between her legs. He peppered her thighs with kisses before pressing his lips gently to the outside of her labia. The smell of sweat and her and him together turned him on. She shivered as he lightly licked the length of her opening several times. He teased her clit with his finger tip before replacing it with his lips and dipping into her warmth. As her moans grew louder she grabbed a pillow from beside her and covered her face, embarrassed. He looked up, snatched the offensive pillow and threw it onto the other bed. 

“No,” he said firmly. 

“But I’m afraid you’re gonna make me scream,” she whined. 

“Then scream. I hope they hear it,” he said arrogantly. She smiled in spite of herself, but tried to keep it down. It took a while, but he didn’t give up until he had her cumming in a moaning, quivering mess.

“Wow,” he said as he lay down next to her, surprised by himself and her and how much fun he was having. He licked his lips and his fingers. 

“Hey, I was gonna say that,” she complained. 

“Sorry. Want me to do it again, so you can say your line?” he asked, reaching his hand toward her pelvis again. 

“No!” she squealed, still sensitive. He laid back next to her and smiled smugly. “I told you, you’re great at everything. Dancing, rapping, singing, sex. It’s all great.” She kissed his cheek where his smile formed his dimple. He tickled her just to hear her giggle. 

“We should get ready to sleep,” he said finally. “We’ve got a big day tomorrow.”

They went to the bathroom to wash their faces and brush their teeth, pushing each other playfully out of the way and dancing while they flossed. 

They cuddled in the middle of the bed. Zeren smiled and made a little joyful sound at something in his head. 

“What is it?” she asked, knowing the sound. 

“Nothing. It’s cheesy,” he told her. 

“Well, then you have to say it,” she insisted. 

“I just can’t wait to wake up next to you tomorrow,” he smiled and kissed her head. 

She smiled into the darkness, too. “Me neither.”

“Goodnight, love,” he said as he closed his eyes. 

“Night night,” she responded and they both fell asleep quickly.


	14. Chapter 14

[That same night]

"I wish someone would have done this for us for our first time," Zhengting said as he spread rose petals on Zeren's bed.

"You didn't like our first time?" Wenjun asked with a slight pout as he lit small candles.

"Don't get me wrong. It was great! But we went into it so quickly and passionately, and neither of us had thought to do something so romantic," he sighed, thinking back to their time in Australia.

"Quickly? We'd only known each other for three years. And we had to be even more secretive than they were. But I promise someday I will do something romantic for you." Wenjun looked lovingly at the older boy.

"You can't count all the time we knew each other!"

"Why not? I've loved you since the moment I met you," the tall boy replied sweetly.

"That doesn't count either because you were in love with my sister," Zhengting argued.

"I wasn't _in_ love with her. I wasn't _attracted_ to her. But the moment I saw you I knew. And I've been in love with you ever since. So I think that counts." He lit the last candle.

"We will still never get the first time back," Zhengting lamented, still holding half a box of rose petals in his hands.

"We could take the rest of these and go decorate our own room. Then I'll give you a great night." Wenjun placed his long thin hands on either side of his lover's face and gave him a gentle kiss.

"Giving me another man's rose petals. I'm touched," he said dryly.

"Well, if you don't want them, then toss them around and let's get out of here." Wenjun reached his hand in the box to grab a fistful of petals, but Zhengting grabbed his wrist.

"I want them."

Wenjun smiled and pulled his hand back. Zhengting snatched the bottle of wine off the table and took it with him. "I deserve this," he said to himself. 

Once they were back in their room, Wenjun sat on the bed and texted Zeren to tell him that everything was ready. When he looked up Zhengting was standing in front of him with a mischievous grin.

"What?" Wenjun smiled suspiciously. 

Zhengting threw a handful of rose petals into the air and let them descend upon his boyfriend, who laughed happily. Wenjun grabbed his waist and pulled him close between his legs. 

"I missed you," Zhengting said, but with a smile, as he ran his fingers through Wenjun’s hair.

"I missed you, too," Wenjun replied before Zhengting leaned down to kiss him.

"If things go well tonight, we should ask those two to make the switch when we get home. That way I can have you all the time," Zhengting said between kisses.

"Don't you think that will make things a bit obvious?" Wenjun wondered. 

"Babe, everyone already knows about us. We are not that good at being secretive."

"Really?" Wenjun was surprised.

"Ugh." The smaller boy lowered himself into the others lap. "Not everyone is as oblivious as you."

"If they know, it's your fault," Wenjun said, pulling Zhengting in tighter.

"Do you not want people to know?" Zhengting asked in a small voice.

"I don't personally care if anyone knows. I love you. I'm not ashamed of it. But you know we can't be public public. Even though everyone already has their theories. It's not that different than for Zeren and Qiao," Wenjun reasoned.

"What about the didis?"

"Like you said, they already know, right? They don't mind. Zeren certainly doesn't. So why shouldn't we be open with them?" Wenjun nuzzled Zhengting's neck.

"So why don't you want to move into my room?" Zhengting asked as he giggled to the tickling sensation.

Wenjun pulled back to look at his face. "Because you're a neat freak."

"I am not!" Zhengting beat his shoulder with his open hand and pushed Wenjun back on the bed. They kissed passionately until they heard the ding of the elevator and paused to listen. A few seconds later they heard the door next door open and clos again and they smiled at each other. 

"Did you remember to leave the gift over there?" Zhengting suddenly thought to ask. 

"I did. How do you think she's going to react?" Wenjun wondered.

"I think she's probably gonna freak out a little bit, but I hope she likes it. She needs to loosen up a little bit. She's been too uptight lately," Zhengting sighed.

"How about I loosen you up a little bit?" Wenjun said seductively, with lust in his eyes and he twisted his hand in his lover's hair.

"Mmm," Zhengting responded before kissing him again. 

Chengcheng and Quanzhe had stayed downstairs until all the food was gone. They shared the elevator ride up with a room service waiter and Chengcheng thought he might pass out from the intoxicating smell of chocolate cake. They got off on the same floor, but he got confused about where his room was and wandered in the wrong direction before turning back and following the waiter. For a hopeful second he thought maybe the cake was going to his room, but the waiter stopped and knocked on Zeren’s door. He walked by in time to see Zeren open the door in a bathrobe and guessed that it was not Wenjun in there with him. He quickened his pace to try to make it to his room before he busted out laughing, but he barely made it. 

“What’s so funny?” Xinchun asked as his roommate entered and quickly closed the door, leaned against it and laughed holding his very full stomach.

“I think Zeren and Qiao are doing it next door,” Chengcheng laughed. 

“Oh, they definitely are,” Xinchun informed him. “You can hear them.”

Just then they heard the two of them laughing next door. “Have you been listening?” Chengcheng looked at him, amused. 

“Not _listening_ , but I have ears.”

Chengcheng went to put his ear to the wall. He could hear their voices but they seemed to just be talking, probably eating that delicious smelling chocolate cake. 

“Who would have thought our little nerd, Zeren, would become a man so soon?” Chengcheng said as he sat down on the bed and removed his shoes. 

“Are you jealous?” Xinchun asked with a smirk. 

Chengcheng just shrugged. He hoped there would be time later in his life to think about women, but if his career really went well that was probably unlikely. If he was jealous of anything it was that Zeren seemed to be able to have it all, and he had snagged the only available target from the rest of them. “Are you?” he asked the other boy in return.

They heard Qiao giggle again and Xinchun turned up the volume on the movie he was watching. He was actually a little jealous that Zeren had gotten the girl, but he figured that was only because Qiao had treated him well, like his own mother and sister, and that was the kind of girl he wanted. He thought Zeren was rather lucky.

Zeren had rightly anticipated how wonderful it would be to wake up with his lover in the morning. Qiao was still cradled next to him, and she smelled lovely. Her skin was soft and warm against him. He couldn’t resist running his fingertips down her arm and over her thigh. She let out a small moan as she slowly entered consciousness. 

“I’m sorry I woke you,” he whispered in her ear. “I couldn’t help touching you. Go back to sleep.”

She mumbled something in response, but neither of them knew what it was. He pulled her a little tighter to him and closed his eyes again, knowing he was going to have to get up soon and wanting to enjoy every second of being with her. She didn’t quite fall back asleep, but she lingered right on the edge of consciousness. Part of her didn’t want to go back to sleep and wanted to be able to enjoy him, but she couldn’t quite pull herself out of it, so she just enjoyed the warmth coming off of him and the bliss of laying in his arms. Eventually the phone rang for his wakeup call and she groaned as he reluctantly let go of her. 

“I’m sorry,” Zeren said again, this time leaning over her as her eyes slowly blinked open so she could see him, and he planted kisses all over her face. “I don’t want to leave you,” he said, kissing her neck and her collar bone. “But I’ve got to shower.” He kissed her breasts and she felt a warm sensation between her legs. “And go to rehearsals.” He kissed her stomach before just resting his cheek there and enjoying the softness of her. 

“Do you really have to?” she asked in a sleepy voice. 

He groaned. “Yes, but I’ll hate it,” he promised. 

“Fine. Leave me. I’m staying here.” She rolled over, dislodging him from his resting place. 

“Aw, now you’re kicking me out?” he pouted. 

“You’ve made your choice,” she said and pulled the covers over her head to block the light. He laughed because he was still under there with her and he rolled her back over so he could give her one real, deep kiss on the mouth before he left her. Once he was out of the bed she fell quickly back asleep and only woke up again when he was putting his shoes on. 

“We’re about to leave,” he told her. “But I figured you’d want to sleep in.”

“You know me,” she smiled. 

He sat on the bed beside her and brushed the hair out of her face and off her shoulder, a wide grin stretched across his face. 

“What?”

“Nothing. We’ll see you there later?” 

“Yeah. I’ll find my way there in a few hours,” she assured him. 

“Okay. I love you,” he kissed her forehead and got off the bed one last time. 

“I love you, too. Work hard,” she said as he opened the door. 

He exited the room just as Chengcheng and Xinchun were coming out of theirs. Chengcheng smiled wide at him and clapped a hand onto the back of his neck. 

“There’s something different about you today, Ren-ge,” he grinned as the three of them approached the others waiting by the elevator. 

Wenjun and Zhengting tried to hold back their laughter, but it was a struggle. Zeren laughed awkwardly and acted like he didn’t know what Chengcheng was talking about as he hit the button for the elevator. They all got in. 

“Does he look taller?” Xinchun asked as they rode down. Again the older duo tried to hold back giggles, failing considerably. 

“What are you talking about?” asked Justin, completely oblivious, while Quanzhe eyed them all suspiciously. “He’s still short as ever.”

Zeren laughed quietly with them as they exited the elevator, not bothered at all by the short comment. They all climbed into the van and got moving. 

“Chun-ge were you able to sleep at all last night? The neighbors were so loud all night!” Chengcheng complained.

Zeren guessed the teasing was going to go on like this at least through the morning. 

“Your neighbors were loud, too?” Zhengting said, looking at his sister’s boyfriend, who started to turn red and pulled down the bill of his hat, but he couldn’t hide his smile. He didn’t think they had been that loud, and they certainly weren’t up all night.

“I didn’t hear a thing,” Zeren said, trying to control his grin. 

Quanzhe was starting to catch on and his jaw dropped open involuntarily as he understood what they were talking about. Justin looked to him for answers, but Quanzhe shut his mouth. He was having a hard enough time keeping the secret from his roommate as it was. He turned around to look at the two oldest boys. 

“Hey, dage, where’s jiejie?” he asked.

“Hmm. I don’t know. I haven’t seen her all morning. Maybe she couldn’t sleep last night either,” he said and they all started laughing again.

“What the hell is going on?” Justin finally asked, frustrated he seemed to be left out of the joke. He felt like he’d been gone from the group for too long and they all knew something he didn’t know. 

“Nothing, Minghao, nothing at all,” Wenjun said, patting him on the shoulder.

He glared at all of them as they tried to get a hold of themselves and then leaned his head back and closed his eyes, ignoring them. 

Zeren felt happy with their teasing, knowing it came from a place of brotherly love. And he felt a little smug about reaching a milestone most of them hadn’t. They continued to laugh and joke around until they got to the stage, and then it was all business at the direction of dance captain Ding Zeren. Once again, he made sure they used up every available second of their rehearsal time. 

“Wow. A leader of men,” Xinchun and Chengcheng clapped when he told them they could go get water. 

“Are you referring to yourselves as men, now?” he taunted. “All I see are boys.” He grinned smugly, and they bowed to him as he moon walked away from them. When they got back to the dressing room he was a little surprised and disappointed Qiao hadn’t appeared yet. He wanted her to have to share the limelight with him, but mostly he just couldn’t wait to see her.

More than an hour after he’d left Qiao finally dragged herself out of bed to take a shower. She looked at herself in the mirror as she brushed her hair and noticed what Zeren had laughed at earlier: a dark hickey just where her neck bent to her shoulder. It was a little tender. She smiled in spite of the fact that she was worried about being able to cover it up. She took a very long shower, mostly just listening to lyrics as they came like the water washing over her and she hoped she'd remember some of them later. She got ready slowly, getting distracted by memories of the previous night and daydreaming about what the future held, interspersed with random phrases that could one day be choruses and melodies that would turn into songs. 

Finally, she had to face the struggle of finding something to wear that would hide the surprise Zeren had left her. Makeup alone wasn’t going to cut it. She had packed summer clothes because of the early hot spell they were having in Shanghai and the one sweater she brought wasn’t enough to cover it up. Desperate for options she noticed Zeren’s denim jacket on the back of the chair. It wasn’t terribly distinctive so she hoped no one would notice it was his because it was the only thing that would cover up the spot. It was a bonus that it matched well with her denim shorts and a double bonus that it smelled like him. She dried her hair and arranged it carefully to try to cover up the spot as well. Ultimately, she guessed she’d just have to take her chances. 

She got a car to take her to the venue and brought a notebook along so she could scribble down any of the lines she had running through her head as she rode quietly in the back seat. When she arrived the boys had just finished getting dressed and the hair and makeup team were coming in before they had to go out and take some photos. She entered the dressing room and casually stood against the wall for a minute before anyone noticed her. When he did, Zeren got up quickly from his chair where he was waiting his turn. He leaned against the wall next to her.

“Is that my jacket?” he asked, leaning down close to her ear. 

“Yes. I had no choice,” she said through gritted teeth and moved the collar just a little. 

He suppressed his laughter. “I was wondering how you were going to deal with that,” he admitted. 

“You!” she wanted to hit him, but she didn’t want to draw attention to them. When she looked up into his face though she melted. She couldn’t really be mad at him. She looked away to repress her desire to kiss him and caught Wenjun’s gaze in the mirror, his expression amused. “Were they awful this morning?” she wondered, looking down at her feet. 

“Not awful, but pretty relentless,” he admitted, still smiling. 

“Mm,” she responded, a little sorry she’d missed it, although she was sure she’d get her fair share in the end. “You should go back over there before we start to look suspicious.”

It seemed his grin was permanently stuck in place. “Okay,” he said, repressing his own urges and reluctantly going back to his chair. 

She continued to stand against the wall, lost in thought, until Zhengting was finished with his hair and makeup. He bounced over to her and said hello. Then he began to arrange her hair, as he did to everyone. She smacked his hand.

“Leave it.” She said tersely. He gave her a strange look and then saw the hickey, his mouth forming an “O” shape.

“You little tramp,” he whispered to her. 

“Shut up,” she said through gritted teeth and went to sit on the couch by the door. He sat down close beside her. 

“How was it?” he asked in a hush tone. She gave him a look like she wasn’t going to talk. “Come ooooooonnn,” he pleaded. 

She bit her lip and started to blush. “It was great,” she admitted quietly. She let her head fall onto the back of the couch before she worried that it might expose her mark and picked her head back up to look at him. “It was totally perfect.” He smiled, happy for her. “I guess I should thank you for whatever part you played in that plan,” she said, but he just made a motion of locking his lips. “Try not to tease him too badly,” she requested. 

“Tease him? He’s loving it,” Zhengting told her with a laugh. 

“So everybody knows?”

“Minghao is still in the dark. Poor dumb little baby,” Zhengting shook his head. “I think Quanzhe caught on pretty quick though. Chengcheng and Xinchun definitely heard last night.” He could barely contain his giggle. She turned bright red and doubled over, burying her face in her knees. He stroked her hair down her back as he himself turned red with laughter.

Eventually they all finished getting ready and went out for group and individual pictures. It was hard for the photographer to get any of Zeren where he wasn’t grinning from ear to ear, but he made an effort to control his expression. There were several unstaged shots of all of them laughing together, even Minghao, who got caught up in the mood although he didn’t know why. It was a genuinely light and uplifting atmosphere and reminded them all how good it was to be together. 

“Hey, Minghao, long time no see,” Qiao said to him with a wink as they all walked back toward the venue. She had decided it was time to have what fun she could with his inflated ego so he could eventually be let in on the joke. 

“Hey, Qiao-jie. Did you miss me?” he asked with a satisfied smile. 

“I did,” she said, although she hadn’t.

“I know, it’s just not the same without this handsome face around.” He held his face up to the sunlight.

“No, it’s definitely not,” she laughed. 

“Do you regret not choosing me as your bias now?” he asked.

“Oh, Minghao, I have so many regrets,” she said with a shake of her head. “I don’t know how I’ll ever forgive myself.”

He stopped. “It’s not too late for us,” he said seriously. 

She took a step toward him and whispered, “I’ll announce my final decision tonight when we all get back to the hotel.” With a wink she skipped off to catch up with her brother.  
With the last couple of hours before the performance they rehearsed a little in their dressing room, ate a small meal and relaxed for a bit, all while Qiao sat scribbling away phrases that were not yet composed into lyrics, just strains of thought about how she felt and what she hoped. Zeren tried not to watch her intently as she was absorbed in it, but he really wanted to read whatever she was writing and he noticed, somehow for the first time, that she was left-handed. He smiled to himself, happy to learn something new about her.

She watched their performance from the audience, her eyes fixed on her lover and his every perfect movement. She could never figure out why they allowed Wenjun to be near him on stage because it was too stark a contrast. It wasn’t Wenjun’s fault he simply didn’t have the proportions to be a good dancer, but he looked worse next to Zeren. They performed only one song, Attention, and then left the stage. She wanted to rush backstage to see them immediately, but she knew she should wait until a break in the broadcast and, more importantly, that they would be busy with media and lots of cameras anyway. Their time was not hers, and she had to get used to that. She reminded herself that she would have plenty of time with all of them for the next week when they all went home and into the studio. When they announced an advertisement break she snuck backstage and found them all talking in the hallway with Du Hua. She hung back, for some reason hoping to escape her notice. 

“Is that Zhu Zhengqiao?” the boss asked, waving her over. “I thought you were around here somewhere.”

“I wanted to watch from the audience,” Qiao explained, nervously pulling her hair down in front. 

“Come, get a picture of me with the Zhu twins,” she said to a photographer, pulling Zhengting over. They all smiled while the photographer snapped away. “Your brother says you’ve been writing up a storm these last couple of weeks,” she said when the photographer went away. 

“Yes, ma’am. I was planning to bring you some things after we get the single worked out next week,” Qiao told her. She actually hadn’t thought much past next week, but she had some things that could be ready if she worked hard on it. 

“I’m not rushing you. I want to hear your best stuff. But we’ll talk more next week when you’re in the building.” As usual, Qiao couldn’t quite read the older woman’s expression. She was always gracious and more generous than the young woman expected, but for some reason it didn’t quite put her at ease. She smiled and nodded, and Du hua walked away. They hung around for a few more hours until after the program ended and went back to the hotel late.

“Wait,” she said to all of them before they all closed their doors. They came back out to meet with her in the hallway. “I have an announcement I want to make.” They all looked at her curiously. “I’m ready to announce my bias,” she said. 

Chengcheng and Zeren both stepped to her side, trying to conceal their knowing smiles, since everyone knew this was for Justin’s sake. 

“Meimei, don’t you want to wait until we get back to the apartment?” Zhengting asked. 

She shook her head. “Now that we’re all back together I can’t wait to tell you anymore. There’s something I need Minghao to hear.” She looked up at him with sexy eyes, using a move he had taught her. 

His mouth fell open a little, actually believing she was about to pick him. 

She took a deep breath. “After a lot of thought. I’m ready to tell you that my bias is…” she looked around at each of their faces. “My bias is Ding Zeren.”

Justin’s face collapsed as Zeren smiled. It fell even further when the dancer turned to grab her firmly and kiss her. 

“WHAT?!” Justin said loudly, eyes wide. 

“I win!” Zeren cheered, picked her up and took her inside their room. 

“WHAT?!” they heard Justin say again as everyone in the hall laughed. He banged loudly on the door after it closed, causing even more laughter. 

“Minghao, come inside and I’ll explain things to you,” Quanzhe said with a hand on his shoulder. 

“They?”

“Yeah.” Quanzhe dragged him back into the room. 

Zeren tossed Qiao on the bed, still laughing at Minghao’s expression. 

“That was totally worth it,” she sighed. 

“I’m glad you’re entertained,” Zeren smiled as he thumbed through the music on his phone. 

“Aren’t you happy? You’re officially my bias now,” she flashed him a smile.

He found the song he was looking for and played it: “I just need you.”

“Very happy,” he admitted. “But I’ve known it.”

“You’re so cheesy,” she laughed, getting off the bed to wrap her arms around him. 

“Too cheesy?” he asked, and looked back at his phone to choose a different song. “How about this one?” He played “On & On.”

“Oh my god,” she rolled her eyes. “You wanna go on and on?” she asked seductively. 

“I do,” he confessed. “Okay, how about this one?” He played their song. 

“Mmm, I love this one.” She smiled, unbuttoning his shirt. 

“It’s my favorite,” he said, brushing her hair away from her neck so he could start kissing her where he had marked her. 

“Hey, you need to be careful with me,” she admonished him. “What if Du Hua had seen it?”

“What if she had?” he asked, as if there would be no consequence.

She stopped. “No, actually what if?” she wondered.

“They don’t own me,” he said definitively. “They can control my public life, so maybe we can’t go out together. But they have no say in what I do in my personal time or who I do it with. There’s nothing that says I can’t have a girlfriend, or have my way with the woman I love.”

“Oh. You want to have your way with me?” she asked, opening his shirt and running her hands over his chest. 

“I can’t help myself,” he said, his voice suddenly rough, just before he kissed her fiercely. He pushed his jacket off her shoulders and broke their kiss so he could pull her shirt over her head. Then he turned her around and unbuttoned her shorts while he kissed her shoulder and neck, making her moan. He removed his own shirt and pants before pushing her onto the bed on all fours. He ran his left hand from her shoulder down to her tattoo while he rubbed his hardening cock against her ass. “Do you want me, baby?” he asked in the same rough voice. 

She was shocked and incredibly turned on by this aggressive side of him. “Yes, daddy, I want you,” she whined. 

He grabbed onto her hip and slid into her, but he was more gentle than she had thought he would be and she enjoyed his care. He enjoyed her curves and the small noises she made as he thrust in and out of her. She could tell he was getting close to his climax and she pulled away from him, to his shock, only to pull him down onto the bed. She lowered herself slowly onto him and found her own rhythm. He enjoyed the view from the front too, and held her breasts firmly as she bounced on him. She took advantage of the opportunity to have her hands on his abs, and she liked the way they flexed as he pulled himself up so he was sitting with her on him. Now he could hold her body and suck on her nipple while she continued to ride him. She felt electric with his hands and mouth all over her, and they climaxed together. She pushed him back down and came down on top of him, sweating and breathing heavy. He held her wordlessly and kissed her hair as they both settled.

“I win,” he said again a minute later when his mind had cleared.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zhang Yixing AKA Lay AKA PD makes a cameo. The boys go home.

In the morning Qiao woke up to his morning wood in her back. Curious, she turned around to look at him, still sleeping soundly with the faintest smile on his lips. Slowly and softly she began to stroke him and watched the corners of his lips pull up slowly, still in a dream. Suddenly, Zeren’s eyes opened in surprise to find his dream was real.

“What were you dreaming about?” she asked, continuing to touch him. 

“You,” he said, although honestly he couldn’t remember because he was very happy with the present state of reality.

“So you guys really always wake up like this?” she asked in reference to his erect penis in her hand. 

“Pretty much,” he admitted with a laugh. 

“That seems so inconvenient.”

“Well,” he said, rolling over on top of her, “It seems pretty convenient to me right now.” He began to kiss her neck and nibble her ears while she kept stroking him, enjoying her gentle touch. Soon he lowered his hips toward hers and she helped him slide into her. They took their time and took advantage of the fact that it was still early morning and their flight wasn’t until noon. They were the last ones to the van, pressing the boundary of “on time”. 

Everyone was flying home together, but all the boys went to wait in a VIP area, away from fans and their cameras, while Qiao was stuck at the gate by herself because Zhengting was unable to get her a first class ticket. She didn’t care about flying first class, but she could tell that those same fan cameras were fixed on her, and she wondered vaguely at what the blogs might say now. 

When she boarded the plane she settled into her aisle seat and got out her notebook, ready to edit and arrange some of the tangent thoughts she had scratched down the day before. 

“Excuse me, I think that’s my seat,” a man said to her, gesturing to the middle seat.

“Oh.” She stood up to let him in. She looked at his face and recognized him, but let him sit before she said anything. “You couldn’t get a first class seat either?” she said in a hushed tone to Zhang Yixing. 

He smiled charmingly, knowing he’d been recognized. “It was a last minute flight,” he confessed. 

“It’s all those Yuehua boys fault,” she told him. “All of NEXT is taking up first class.”

“Really? NEXT is on the flight?” He smiled again. “Maybe I should say hi.” He looked over the seats in front of him, although he couldn’t see into first class. 

“Take a selfie with me, and I’ll get you a first class seat like that.” She snapped her fingers. He gave her a strange look. “My name is Zhu Zhengqiao. I’m-”

“Zhu Zhengting’s sister?” he reacted quickly. She looked at him surprised. “You look alike.”

“Yes, I am," she confirmed.

“Okay, let’s take a selfie,” he smiled. She used her phone and they both did peace signs. She posted it to OASIS with the caption: _Who needs first class with NEXT when I can sit coach with Lay?_

While she was posting he noticed the notebook in her lap. “You write?” he asked pleasantly. 

“Oh yeah, just some songs I’m working on,” she blushed. 

“Zhu Zhengqiao. I know that name...You wrote that UNIQ song, didn’t you?” he said, trying to remember. “'Tomorrow with you.'"

“Yeah, that was me,” she admitted, blushing deeper. 

“Exo loves that song,” he told her. She tried to remember to breathe. 

Just as the seven members of NEXT were getting to their seats, seven phones beeped with update notifications from OASIS. Seconds later Zeren, Justin and Zhengting came crashing into coach looking for Qiao. 

“PD!” Zhengting cried when he found them. 

Zhang Yixing laughed. “You don’t have to call me that anymore,” he told him. 

“Teacher we can’t let you sit back here,” Zeren said to him, out of breath. “Please go take my seat.”

“Oh, no. I couldn’t. I’m fine here with Zhengqiao,” Lay smiled at them. 

Zeren looked anxiously back and forth between his woman and his mentor. “Lay, I absolutely insist.”

Lay looked at Qiao, who was holding in her laughter and then back at Zeren's eager face. He guessed there was something more than respect for his mentor behind the offer, and he gave in. “Okay. Thank you, Zeren.”

She stood up again so he could exit the row. Lay and Zeren shared a brotherly hug. 

“Nice to meet you, Zhu Zhengqiao,” Lay said with a wave and went up to first class with the other boys.

Zeren smiled happily as he took the older man’s place, and she took her seat next to him. She got out her phone again to text him. 

ZZQ: You shouldn’t be here.

He watched her type her message and smiled when his phone buzzed.

DZR: I couldn’t let you sit next to that handsome man

She rolled her eyes at him.

ZZQ: 🙄But now I have to sit next to another handsome man. There are people back here who can’t know about us. You’d better control yourself.

DZR: You’d better control yourself. 😋

ZZQ: This is my point. Why put me in this position? 😘

DZR: Sorry. You know I couldn’t help myself 🥰

ZZQ: You never can. 

DZR: It’s only two hours.

He hooked his foot around hers discreetly, and contented himself with this amount of contact. She turned her attention back to her notebook to distract herself from him. 

“Can I see what you’ve written?” he asked quietly as they announced to get buckled up for take off. 

“Later,” she told him, not taking her eyes off the page she was reviewing. She ripped it out and flipped to a new page where she began to rearrange and rewrite certain lines while adding other ones. He put his headphones in and relaxed while she worked and she did her best to block him out. 

After most of the flight had passed she nudged him, and when he opened his eyes she passed him her notebook. He read them carefully and smiled. He asked for her pen and turned to a new page. 

_When do we get to sing this one?_

_This one isn’t for you guys_

_Who’s it for?_

_I’m going to offer it to Du Hua for Everglow_

_Why?_

_Too feminine_

He pouted

_Not everything has to be for you_

He quit pouting and smiled at her and handed her back the notebook. He looked around discreetly before he leaned close to her ear to whisper. “You’re so talented.”

She smiled at the compliment, even though she felt it was undeserved. She packed her notebook away and leaned back in her seat with her eyes closed for the rest of the flight, her hands balled into fists to remind her to keep them to herself. 

“Did you guys join the mile high club?” Justin asked as they got into the van to take them to their apartment, finally feeling like he could be part of the joke. Zeren smacked him on the back of the head as they walked to the seats in the back. 

“You guys should perform your songs for us tonight,” Zhengting said, looking between Chengcheng, Qiao and Zeren. They looked at each other. 

“Fine by me. Then tomorrow we can start rehearsals so you can all be ready when we go into the studio on Monday,” she said, thinking she was going to be more strict with them than she had been with Zhengting. 

“You remember the choreography?” Zeren whispered in her ear, pulling her close to his side and making her smile. They’d only practiced it once or twice since their first kiss.

“We’ll have time to practice,” she whispered back. 

When they got home he took her straight to the dance studio and closed the door, something he rarely did. 

“What are you doin?” she wondered. 

“Closed rehearsal,” he told her and pushed her against the wall so he could kiss her passionately. 

When he pulled away she cleared her throat. “That doesn’t come until the end,” she told him. 

“I had to get it out of my system,” he replied. “Let’s get to work.”

He felt a little more competitive than usual, determined to come out on top of Chengcheng’s song. Even though he knew he had the girl, he wanted his song to be the best and he wanted to show off for her. He pushed her hard in the rehearsal, but she kept up and dealt with it well, and she remembered the steps. She could see that it was important to him, and she admired how driven he was in his art, so she was determined to do her best for him. After a little more than an hour there was a knock on the door. 

“Are you practicing in there or just fooling around?” Chengcheng said to the door. 

Zeren opened the door and Chengcheng could see he had his dance captain expression on. 

“Oh. Will I get a chance to practice with her, too?” Chengcheng asked. 

“Yeah. Give us fifteen more minutes,” Zeren requested. The other boy nodded and walked away. He was actually quite satisfied with their performance together and didn’t need the extra time. He made her run through it one more time, and at the end he picked her up and kissed her against the wall for a couple of minutes. 

“Are we going to do that in the performance?” she asked when he put her down. 

“Mmm, probably best if we don’t,” he said, still trapping her against the wall, kissing her neck. He simply wanted to be on her at all times. He tried to remember back to before they had made love and how much self control he had, thinking he was a fucking hero. Now he was weak just like every other man. “Why are you so irresistible?” he asked against her skin, but she couldn’t think of a response. 

Finally he forced himself to separate from her. “Which song do you think they’ll pick?” he asked.

The racing of her heart slowed as she came back down to earth. She shrugged. “I win either way,” she said, trying to be diplomatic, but really thinking they would pick Zeren’s. “You’d better go so I can practice with Chengcheng.”

“You’d better only be practicing,” he threatened playfully. She just stuck her tongue out as he left the room and Chengcheng came in.

“Are you ready?” he asked, and she responded by going to sit at the keyboard. “Can you do the high parts?” he asked. 

“No problem,” she assured him and began to play. Playing and singing was a lot easier than dancing and Chengcheng wasn’t so concerned about perfection as Zeren was, so they just ran through it a few times and called it quits. 

“I remember when you told me not to open the box,” Chengcheng reminded her when she turned around on the bench to face him. “I guess it’s open now.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, a confused expression on her face. 

“Well, when I started writing this song I had a little crush on you,” he confessed. “You were just this cool, pretty girl who had moved in and I thought, maybe...well, it was just one of those crushes where you wonder _what if._ ”

She knew exactly what he was talking about and thought back to the conversation she had once had with Zeren about having a crush on someone just because they exist. “I get it.”

“It’s funny because I saw you and Zeren kiss, and I realized how shallow it was. I didn’t really have feelings for you at all, I was just projecting the idea of it onto you. Somehow I feel like I understand the song differently now.” He felt a little more grown up with the understanding of it.

She sighed. “I used to feel that way a lot. You learn to grow out of it,” she assured him. “Don’t worry Cheng-ge. Someday there will be a girl you really have feelings for, and you’ll be able to write a different kind of song. And I’ll be happy to help if you need it.”

He smiled and thanked her.

They ordered a huge dinner for the eight of them and enjoyed a long meal, talking and laughing and catching up on things they missed while they were separated, but teasing each other more than anything. Qiao and Zeren took their fair share of abuse. They felt like a big happy family, a real band of brothers and their big sister. When they’d finished they left all the dishes where they were and headed to the studio. The seven boys sat on the floor with their backs to the mirror while Qiao talked to them. 

“I’ve been given a task by Du Hua to help you guys write your next album. At first, I was pretty scared. I felt a lot of pressure, and I kind of had the impression that you guys were falling apart, and I was somehow supposed to help put you back together.” They looked at each other, sharing some meaningful glances. “But I feel a lot better now, because not only have you been great creative partners, I can see that you guys actually care a lot about each other, and this isn’t as fragile as some have made it out to be. So far we’ve got two songs for this album, with some more in works, and I’m really excited to show them to you tonight. So, without further ado, Cheng-ge and I will perform our song, ‘Maybe’.”

She invited Chengcheng up and sat down at the keys. They performed every note perfectly and got a huge applause from the boys. 

“So pretty,” cried Justin for his favorite bro, reacting over the top as always. “Jia you, Cheng-ge!” 

Chengcheng shushed him bashfully as he sat down beside him. 

“I just wanted to remind you that these are not solo songs, so you all have parts in there for you. And now Zeren and I will perform his choreography to our demo for ‘Show you,’” she smiled as Zeren joined her. He queued Zhengting to start the song when they’d taken their positions. 

Everyone had high expectations of Zeren’s choreo, and they were not disappointed. He had opted to go in full force like he had that one time they danced that changed his life forever, not even caring if Zhengting was there or not. In his mind, that was the truest service to the song, and he had no other choice. When the song ended they weren’t caught up in the moment or each other like they had been before, but they felt a sense of accomplishment together. Yet there was silence, until Zhengting jumped to his feet. 

“That’s how you seduced my sister!” he yelled, pointing an accusatory finger at the master dancer. 

Zeren turned around, his breathing heavy and an intense look in his eye. He just shrugged. 

“Would’ve worked on me, too,” Zhengting smiled playfully. Wenjun grabbed his hand and pulled him back down to the floor. 

They clapped, but were still pretty stunned. 

“Wow. You wrote that song?” Xinchun asked Zeren, impressed. Only he and Justin hadn’t heard it.

“Well, Qiao-jie did most of the work,” he replied. 

“No. It was definitely a team effort,” she told them. 

Justin leaned over to whisper something in Chengcheng’s ear, causing the older boy to hit him several times. 

“Okay, time to vote!” Zhengting announced. 

“Oh, we don’t really need to vote. They both belong to all of us now,” Qiao tried to reason with him. 

“No. We must!” Zhengting insisted. 

“What happens if we win?” Zeren wondered. 

“What more do you want? You’ve already got the girl, didi,” Wenjun said, gesturing toward Qiao. 

Chengcheng stood up to stand by her other side. “How about if the winner buys hotpot for everyone tomorrow night?”

Zeren smiled good naturedly. “Deal.”

Qiao took both of their hands. “Close your eyes,” she told them and they obeyed. “Alright cast your votes.”

Everyone pointed to Zeren but Justin, always a loyal didi. She lifted Zeren’s hand, but squeezed Chengcheng's and everyone clapped. 

“Okay. You have your winner. Hot pot on Zeren,” she smiled. “Now everyone go relax and get a good night’s sleep because tomorrow you’re going to work hard to learn your parts.”

“Yes, jiejie,” they all said and wandered off to their rooms. 

Wenjun and Qiao were the last to leave. They both stopped outside Wenjun and Zeren’s bedroom and shared a look. Wenjun smiled and turned around to go back to Zhengting’s room. Zeren was taking clothes out of his suitcase and putting him into his hamper. Qiao walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around him without saying a word. He tried to turn around, but she held him firmly and wouldn’t let him move. 

“What’s up?” he wondered with a light laugh. 

“It’s just nice to be home with you. I missed you the last couple weeks and Shanghai was kind of crazy. Now I have you all alone and at home, I really just want to hold you and take a breath.” She breathed in deeply and released him a little as she let go of it so he could finally turn around.

He put his arms around her and looked down at her face. “Have I been too demanding?” he worried. He hadn’t expected his own appetite to be quite so voracious. 

“That’s not what I meant. It was just that since we’ve been out of the apartment we’ve had to restrain ourselves. It takes a lot of effort just to not hold your hand and lean my head on your shoulder. Just little things,” she sighed. 

“I know what you mean,” he smiled, pulling her in and kissing the top of her head. “It’s nice to be by your side without feeling like I’m going to expose us.”

“I didn’t think I’d want to be stuck in this apartment so badly,” she admitted. 

“Oh, yes. Now I have you trapped here,” he smiled mischievously.

“What are you going to do with me?” she wondered. 

He pushed her gently toward the bed and grabbed her firmly by the back of her head as he began to kiss her neck. "I used to be such an innocent boy before I met you," he rasped against her skin. 

"Zhengting was afraid I would corrupt you," she breabreathed. 

"He was right."

"I'm not so sure. I think maybe you were just like this, and you didn't know it." She turned them both so she could push Zeren onto the bed and then climbed on top of him. "Before me, you didn't have anyone to act out your fantasies with."

She hovered over him, not kissing him, not touching him, not grinding herself down on those amazing hips that she loved to watch, although those were all things she wanted to do. She just looked down at his seemingly angelic face and wondered where he would take her. He ran his hands over her curves and hummed. 

"You make a fair point," he admitted before pulling her down by her hips so their bodies could meet. He was thinking of her just like this but with all her clothes off, riding him beautifully. He pulled her face down to his and kissed her while she slowly worked over him, bringing him to excitement. She moaned softly into him as his hands slid over her skin, gently tugging at her shirt.

They did not get a good night’s sleep.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys can't take Qiao anywhere.
> 
> There's a bit of gratuitous smut at the end of this chapter beginning at the italics, should you wish to avoid it. Warning: oral sex (male receiving)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, to be honest they're all the handsome one.

The next morning Qiao made a large breakfast for everyone in order to butter them up for a long day of practicing. They had two songs to record and a limited amount of time with everyone in Beijing to get it done, so she wasn’t going to let them go in unprepared like her brother. They were going to record Zeren's song first. They had learned the lyrics fine, but they were lacking the proper attitude. 

"It's supposed to be sexy and seductive. You've got to do more than just sing it," she tried to tell them. "Think of Beyoncé 'Dance for you'." 

They all stared at her blankly and she sighed. She suddenly wondered what she had thought would make six sheltered boys understand this, and what had made Zeren get it so easily. 

She scratched her head. "This isn't working. Let's just work on the other one for a while."

Zhengting and Wenjun were last to join the five other boys as they gathered to leave for dinner. 

“Where’s Qiao?” Zeren asked her brother. Zhengting just rolled his eyes and gestured toward their room. 

“Are you ready to go?” Zeren asked, popping his head into her room. 

“Um, I’m not going to go,” she said quietly without looking up from her book. 

“What? Why not?” He entered the room fully to sit beside her on the bed. 

She shrugged. “I just don’t feel like it.”

He took the book from her hand and replaced it with his own. “What’s really going on?”

She frowned. “There’s no point in me going out. It will just cause trouble.”

“For who? You’re still worried about those bloggers?” he asked, trying to get her to look him in the eyes. 

“Du Hua already said she wants to talk to me this week in the office. I’m not going to give them the chance to add more fuel on the fire,” she told him, still avoiding his gaze. 

“Fine. Then I won’t go either.” He crossed his arms and leaned heavily on her. 

She tried to push him off. “Nooo. You have to go. The guys are counting on you. You owe them.”

“But I don’t want to go if you won’t be there.” She gave up trying to get him off of her. 

“I’ll be okay,” she said, but he wasn’t convinced. 

He turned over on his stomach so he could look at her face. “Are you really going to let these people run your life?” he asked seriously. “You’re never going to leave this apartment except on official business?”

“Isn’t that what you do?” 

“Not tonight. Tonight we have strength in numbers and the promise of a good meal. So, please, come,” he begged. He could see she was considering it so he pushed harder. He got off the bed and tugged on her arm. “Come on, baby, please.”

“Ugh. Fine,” she groaned and let him pull her off the bed. 

He pulled her directly into his arms and held her for a moment. Then he whispered, “Is that what you’re wearing?”

She pushed him away as he laughed. “Get out so I can change.”

“Hey, I don’t see why I should have to leave anymore. Nothing I haven’t seen before,” he winked at her. 

She rolled her eyes and went to her closet to pick out a pair of tight black jeans and a nice shirt. “Go!” she told him, but he crossed his arms and shook his head. 

“Hurry,” he told her. “Everyone’s waiting.” She waited a few seconds more until she accepted that he wasn’t going to leave and then changed quickly. 

“Are you happy now?” she asked when she was ready, holding her hands out wide. 

“Very,” he smiled, taking one of her hands and leading her out to the others. 

“You can’t hold my hand when we get to the restaurant,” she reminded him quietly as they walked toward the elevator.

“I know, but I can hold it until then,” he replied. 

“And I’m going in Wenjun’s car,” she told him, since he had decided he wanted to drive. 

“What? Why?”

“Because that’s where Zhengting will be, so it’s where I should be,” she told him plainly. 

He sighed. “Xinchun, you drive,” he said, handing the older boy the keys. 

“And you can’t walk in next to me,” she said when they got in the back of the car. 

Zeren tried not to roll his eyes. He knew it wasn’t her fault she was being extremely cautious, but he didn’t feel like he needed all the reminders and her nagging was killing his mood. “Can I sit next to you at dinner?” he asked sarcastically. 

Zhengting and Wenjun shared a worried and awkward look as they listened.

“Did you get the private room?” 

He sighed heavily. 

“Qiao-jie, relax,” Wenjun interjected. “Everything is going to be okay. You walk in with me and Ting. Try not to let this stress you out. It's just dinner.”

She just nodded and stared out the window. Zhengting turned up the music in the car. When she felt like the two older boys weren’t paying attention to them anymore she leaned in close to Zeren and put her chin on his shoulder so she could whisper in his ear. “I’m sorry.”

He shifted in his seat so he could look at her and brushed back her hair. He shook his head and gave her a sympathetic look, as if to say it wasn’t her fault they couldn’t be a regular couple. He kissed her forehead and held her hand tighter, grateful to have her at his side at all. 

Over dinner they came back to the issue of Zeren's song.

"Okay, guys," Zeren began, trying to explain to them how to be sexy, "you know when you're with a girl and..." he laughed. "Oh wait. No, you don't," he said smugly and looked sideways at Qiao who covered her face to hide her smile and her bright red cheeks. 

"Shut up, Zeren," Chengcheng responded, irritated. "You were just like the rest of us when you wrote this song."

"That's true," Qiao agreed. "Okay, then think of the song Flawless, or David." They all tried to remember Zeren's solo singles.

"Holy shit," Quanzhe said. Everyone stopped to look at him. "How the hell did Zeren become the sexy one?" he asked.

"What?" Zeren was surprised himself, and blushing a little. "I'm not."

"Yes, you are." Quanzhe insisted. "All your songs are sexy. Why?" 

"Zeren is not the sexy one. I am," Justin argued.

"No, dude, you're the handsome one. It's not the same thing," Chengcheng told him. 

"Wait. I'm the sexy one!" Zhengting cried. They all looked at him and shook their heads. 

"No. You're the mature one," Xinchun said. "I think I agree with Quanzhe. I think Zeren is the sexy one. Oh my god."

"Then where does that leave the rest of us?" Chengcheng wondered. 

"Cute, bad boy, smart," Xinchun said, pointing at Quanzhe, Chengcheng and himself in turn.

"What about me?" Wenjun asked, like he didn't know the answer.

"Tall," they all said together, and Wenjun rolled his eyes.

"Hey, that's not fair," Qiao responded. "Wenjun's more than tall. He's...cool?" She tried. They all shrugged.

"I feel like we're getting off topic," Zeren stopped them.

"No, no, I think I get it now," Quanzhe said. "I'll just try to copy that breathy thing you do," he grinned.

"That'll work," Qiao agreed.

"You think I'm the sexy one, babe?" Zeren asked with a hand on her knee.

Justin picked up a piece of carrot and threw if at Zeren's face. "Get a room."

Zeren gave Qiao a quick kiss before they exited the dining room. As they walked out of the restaurant it was obvious that the word had spread about their outing. Yuehua had even sent a few bodyguards to the site to defend them against the large crowd of people, mostly girls, who had gathered outside. Their fans screamed for them, and the boys smiled and waved politely as they walked to their cars. 

“I love you, Justin!” they heard.

“Bi Wenjun!” others chanted. 

Clearly, from somewhere at the front of the crowd, someone shouted her name.

“Zhu Zhengqiao!” 

She turned her head instinctively. 

“Stay away from our boys! You’re too shameless!”

She froze in place as a plastic cup full of coffee whizzed past her. It barely missed Wenjun. Zeren, who was walking in front of her with Quanzhe between them, couldn’t help looking back. Before he could do anything else, Zhengting put his arm around his sister and pulled her toward the car. 

“Keep moving. Let it go,” Zhengting said quietly in her ear. 

The guards began to move them more quickly toward their cars. One of them herded Zeren toward Xinchun’s car, while the three oldest ended up alone. Qiao managed to make it into the car before she began crying. 

“I told you! I knew it! I told him I shouldn’t come out,” she cried to Zhengting and Wenjun as they pulled away from the restaurant. 

“Put your seatbelt on,” Wenjun told her quietly. She complied as she sobbed. 

“Don’t listen to them, meimei. It was just a random person. You have every right to be here with us,” Zhengting reached his hand to the backseat and tried to comfort her. “It’s not a big deal. Okay? Don’t take it to heart.”

She couldn’t respond. She was too filled with anger and sadness. She leaned her head against the window and cried the whole way home. 

In the other car, Zeren felt he was going to burst. On the one hand, he was livid about the fan who had called her out, practically attacked her. He was also frustrated that he couldn’t protect her, and that he wasn’t with her at that moment to comfort her. He also knew he would be in trouble. She had told him she shouldn’t and didn't want to go, but he hadn’t listened. He'd forced her when she'd said no, and he knew he was wrong. She was too sensitive, and she knew it, but he couldn’t properly protect her feelings. Squished between Chengcheng and Quanzhe he was feeling very claustrophobic. He leaned over Quanzhe to roll down the window and bring in some fresh air. It didn’t help.

“Maybe she didn’t hear,” Justin said after a few minutes of silence, looking back at his friend, who was shaking quietly. 

“She’ll be fine,” Xinchun tried to reassure the boy whose distraught face was filling his rearview mirror. 

“Everyone just stop talking,” Zeren said quietly. 

Xinchun stopped at a red light, losing Wenjun as he sped off ahead of them. When they got back to the apartment Qiao went straight to the bathroom to wash off the makeup her tears had already ruined. As the rest of the boys walked in a few minutes later Zeren rushed down the hallway past Wenjun and Zhengting to their rooms, and caught a glimpse of Qiao going from the bathroom to her own room before loudly slamming the door, causing all of them to jump. He arrived at the door and shot a glance at the two eldest boys, hoping for some reassurance, but receiving none. He knocked softly on the door. 

“Qiao,” was all he said. 

“Go away,” she told him as she shucked off her jeans. 

He laid his hand flat and his forehead against the door with a light thud. “Baby, please talk to me,” he begged. There was no response from inside as she changed. She picked up his hoodie and debated whether she wanted to wear it or burn it. 

Zeren looked back down the hall to see several of the boys still watching him. He gestured for them to go away. Chengcheng turned on the TV and they all tried to give them some privacy. 

Zeren stood a moment longer in the hallway. Maybe he should let her be, to cool off or cry it out and let her come to him when she was ready. He couldn’t help thinking that would never happen. He wanted to comfort her, and he wouldn’t leave until he did. With that conviction he opened the door and entered without her invitation. She glared at him with red, puffy eyes as her head popped through the hood of his sweatshirt.

“I told you,” she said bitterly. 

“I know. I should have listened to you,” he admitted, taking a step toward her. He sighed. “I know you’re mad. And I know you’re hurt. If you want to yell at me, I will take it. If you want to cry, I will hold you. Just don’t shut me out, okay? I’m here for you.” He approached her with open arms, hoping she would fall into them, or at the very least understand that he wanted to support her. As he came closer to her she pushed his arms away, but he didn’t give up. She looked at him with the tender and teary eyes of a hurt child, and there was no way he wasn’t going to hold her. Slowly he took another step toward her so their bodies met, and wrapped one arm around her shoulders and cradled her head against his shoulder with the other. 

“I’m sorry,” he said against the fabric of the hood. “I’m so sorry.” She didn’t respond, just stood with her arms by her side. “You mustn’t listen to them. You haven’t done anything wrong. You are supposed to be with us. You’re supposed to be with me, remember?” His voice came through to her muffled. She sighed and put her arms loosely around his waist. "I wish I could protect you better," he sighed.

“It's not your fault. But I’m never leaving the apartment again,” she declared. "And you have to listen to me from now on."

“What about to go to work?” he asked, swaying her a little back and forth.

“I’ll ride in the trunk and enter through the basement,” she stated.

“Okay,” he smiled. “We will stay here forever.” He held her tighter. “But it won’t always be like this,” he promised her.

“No?”

“No. Once our new music comes out and they find out how great you are, and how great you’re going to make us, they will love you,” he told her with full confidence. 

“Pfft. No one cares who writes pop songs. No one even knows who writes pop songs,” she told him, pulling away to sit on her bed. 

“We’ll make them know. All you need is a good PR campaign.” He sat beside her and held her by his side, unwilling to let her go.

“Ugh. I don’t want to be famous. I don’t want them to know me at all. I’d rather be invisible,” she groaned, tightening to strings of his hood around her face and falling over sideways into his lap. 

“Well, do you want to write hits for your favorite boy band, or do you want to be invisible?” He loosened the hood framing her face so he could look her in the eyes and smile. “You can’t have both.” She didn’t respond other than to groan again. He leaned down to give her soft kisses all over her face, eventually getting her to laugh. “I’m sorry, but you’re going to be wildly successful, and someday both you and they are going to accept that.”

“You really think so?” she asked, her bottom lip puffed out a bit. 

“I’m absolutely certain,” he said before kissing her. “Now, let’s go to bed. We have a big day tomorrow,” he smiled.

“I’m already in my bed,” she grinned at him.

“Okay, then I’ll stay here,” he replied, leaning back and pretending to snore. 

She rolled over so she could see his face. “You can’t sleep without me?”

“Well, I _can_ , but I don’t want to. I want to hold you, like a teddy bear. Is that wrong?” he wondered, feeling like maybe he was being too needy. 

She moved so he could see her face. “No,” she shook her head. “I like it when you hold me.” He naturally wrapped his arms around her and they looked into each other’s eyes for a moment until there was a knock on the door. 

“Can we come in?” Zhengting asked.

“It’s your room,” she replied. 

“Yeah, but I’m not going to see anything a brother shouldn’t see, right?” She could hear the smirk in his voice.

“No,” she replied, but sat up properly anyway. 

Zhengting opened the door very slowly, with Wenjun right behind him. “Did you guys make up?” he asked quietly. 

“We weren’t fighting.”

“But did he make it right?” Wenjun asked with his arms crossed, staring at his roommate. 

Zeren looked anxiously at Qiao. 

“Yes,” she responded with a little smile.

“Then are you staying in here tonight?” Zhengting asked, leadingly. 

She rolled her eyes. “No. Room’s all yours. Goodnight.” She and Zeren stood up and left, closing the door behind them. 

Qiao pulled Zeren into his own room, closed the door and pushed him against it. She reached up on her toes to kiss him, desperate and needy. When she pulled away, he looked at her with shocked but amused eyes. He grabbed her hips and pulled her against his body again. 

“I love it when you do that,” he growled. 

She smiled and looked at him softly. She reached a hand up to brush the hair out of his eyes. “Thank you.”

“For what?” he wondered, surprised.

“For supporting me and my work,” she responded, truly touched. 

He squeezed her tighter. “You don't have to thank me. I believe in you. I always will. We support each other.” 

__

She nodded happily before kissing him again and he loosened his grip. He wanted to push her toward the bed, but Qiao pushed him back against the door. She kissed his neck and worked her way down to the exposed triangle of flesh where his shirt was unbuttoned. Zeren let out a moan as she pushed her hand over his hard cock inside his jeans. She rubbed him and left gentle kisses over his collarbone before she began to work her fingers at his belt, his button, and his zipper. 

“Qiao?” he breathed out, ragged, as she slid her hand under his boxers to feel his swollen length. She pulled away and his eyes closed briefly, but opened again, heavy, to meet her gaze as she sank to her knees. She hooked her fingers around the elastic waistband and slid his jeans and his boxers down his legs, still maintaining eye contact. She smiled as his cock sprang out in front of her. She took him in her hand, stroking him gently at first, and then more firmly as he let his head fall back against the door with a thud. “Oh my--Fuuuuuck…” he breathed as she licked the tip teasingly. His voice barely made a sound as he said her name again when she took him into her mouth for the first time. He tried to quiet his moans, but they only drove her on as she took more of him into her mouth. He gripped the door knob until his knuckles were white and twisted the fingers of his other hand into his hair. As he got closer to climax his legs tensed and his hips bucked toward her involuntarily, but she just grabbed onto his firm ass and took him all the way into her mouth before she picked up the tempo. 

“Fuck, Qiao, I’m gonna-” but he didn’t have time to finish his sentence before her released into her mouth, warm and tangy. “Sorry,” he said automatically. 

Qiao swallowed happily, pleased with herself and the fact that he felt good. She placed her hand on top of his and pulled herself up to look at him. “Why? That’s what I intended to happen,” she smiled. 

Zeren huffed a laugh in spite of himself and put his hands on either side of her head. “You’re amazing,” he grinned before he kissed her. He slipped his hands under her sweatshirt to grip her hips firmly with his finger, hungry for the feel of her skin. "What would I do without you?"

Qiao smirked. "Probably just masturbate a lot."


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys learn a secret Qiao has been keeping from them. Surprise Idol Producer cameo!

On Monday morning everyone rode to the studio feeling confident, even Qiao. Yu ming met them in the control room, which quickly got cramped with the nine of them in there. He played them the music track, which Yu Ming had mixed to perfection, but it was still missing Zeren's beatbox line. He went into the isolation booth and busted out a line. It took him a few tries, but all the boys were impressed. It was pretty cramped so Zeren took the rap team out to practice while Qiao worked with the vocals. She felt relieved that their hard work the day before was paying off and they all appeared professional in front of Yu Ming

Late in the morning the door to the control room opened and Du Hua's assistant came in.

"Zhu Zhengqiao, the boss would like to talk to you in her office." 

Qiao swallowed hard and followed the assistant out of the room, nodding to Yu Ming as she went.

When they got to the office Zeren was waiting outside and they gave each other a nervous and frightened look. So obviously management knew about them. Were they going to break the couple up? Zeren wanted to take her hand, hug her, do anything to touch her and tell her it would be alright, but they remained a safe distance from each other.

"Zhu Zhengqiao, she wants to see you first," the assistant said and opened the door for her. 

She had never been in Du Hua’s personal office. It was a large room, and the boss was seated behind a large desk with two chairs in front. She wore a stern expression and invited Qiao to sit.

"Why do you always look like you're in trouble?" Du Hua asked.

"Because it's my greatest fear," Qiao admitted. "And because I have no poker face."

Du Hua actually laughed a little. "I wanted to ask you in private before Zeren comes in if you're taking all the precautions necessary...for your health?" Her eyes flashed subtly.

"Oh.” Qiao swallowed. “Yes! I have it under control," she assured the older woman.

"Good. Because you can't afford any accidents." Du Hua pushed the intercom button on her phone and commanded Zeren be sent in.

Although the conversation so far has been awkward, it actually filled Qiao with hope and she felt happy to see Zeren walk in. He bowed and sat anxiously beside her.

"Okay, let's get to the point," Du Hua said, folding her hands on her desk. "I know about you sharing a room in Shanghai. I can only imagine what else has gone on at home." They both had their heads down, respectfully avoiding eye contact with her and each other. "It would be best for me and my business if I could put my idols into boxes and take them out when it was time to work. But you're people, and some people can't live without love. I understand that. We calculated this risk when we agreed to let you move in," she said, looking at Qiao. “So I'm not terribly surprised and I'm not here to break you up."

They chanced a look at each other, both wearing surprised expressions.

"Look at me," she instructed. They did. "I won't try to dictate what you do in the privacy of your home, but I will control your public life," her speech directed at Zeren now. "So, there are some ground rules." They both nodded. "Absolutely no social media. In fact, Zhengqiao I'd be more comfortable if you deleted your accounts completely. There should never be any picture of the two of you together. Luckily there isn't any rumor right now of your relationship. At least there's nothing more than what links you to the other boys. Which brings me to the next rule. Zhengqiao, no more dinner with the boys. I don't want to see you with them except for work, and no one else does either." Qiao sighed in relief, because she didn't want to go out either. "There can never be any declaration of your relationship while either of your works for this company. If you get found out, it's Zhengqiao’s job on the line. Your time with the company and likely your entire career will be at an end. Understood?" 

Qiao swallowed hard. "Yes, ma'am. I understand."

"No one will know," Zeren assured them both.

"Good. Because you both have promising futures in this business," Du Hu said with a satisfied smile. "Zhengqiao, 'Tomorrow with you' just went platinum in South Korea."

Qiao's jaw dropped. "No way. It's only been out a couple of months."

"It's true. I got a call yesterday. Congratulations."

"Thank you. Thank you so much," Qiao smiled. 

"Thank you. You're making me money," Du Hua laughed. "You should go get back to work now, so you can make me some more."

They popped out of their chairs and made for the door after several more thank you's. 

"You wrote 'Tomorrow with You'?" Zeren asked when they were in the hallway.

"Yes," she admitted as they walked back to the studio.

"Why didn't you tell anyone? Everyone loves that song! We used to listen to it constantly when it first came out," he told her.

She blushed. "I heard you singing it the other day, but I didn't want to say anything," she admitted.

"That's because Yibo sings it _all the time_. I can't believe this." He smiled in amazement at her. 

No one was in the studio when they got there. "I guess it's lunch time," she said, looking around at the empty rooms. "Let's go get something to eat."

"In a minute," Zeren said, locking the door and pushing her against the wall. "I can't believe I get to keep this insanely hot and successful songwriter as my girlfriend," he said quietly as he looked into her eyes. 

"The harder you work, the luckier you are," she smiled before he kissed her. 

"I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to do that here," Qiao said, smoothing her hair a few minutes later. 

"Won't happen again," he promised, although he didn't mean it, and helped her with her hair.

"Do I look okay?" She asked before they went out.

"Perfect," he told her as she straightened out his collar. "What?" He asked when she stared at him. 

"I just love it when you wear bandanas like that," she sighed. He laughed and they exited the room feeling very naughty.

They found the other six guys in the cafeteria eating and wearing worried expressions. They relaxed when they saw the pair's smiles.

"Everything okay?" Zhengting asked, sipping on the iced coffee he was having for lunch. 

"Great," Qiao replied with a smile.

"Yeah, except that Qiao-jie's been keeping a secret from us," Zeren told them. Everyone turned to look at her, but he spoke again. "She wrote 'Tomorrow with You' and it just went platinum in South Korea."

Their jaws dropped. "What?" Justin cried and immediately began singing the song, dancing wildly in the middle of the cafeteria.

Zhengting stood up. "How can you keep so many secrets from me!"

"I like to be mysterious," she shrugged.

"How did you not guess that?" Wenjun commented to his boyfriend. "It totally sounds like her. I knew it immediately." Zhengting rolled his eyes.

"Are you okay with what Du Mama said today?" Zeren wanted to know as he held Qiao in bed that night.

She looked at him curiously. "I get to keep you. How could I complain?"

"But only in here," he sighed. 

"In here is pretty good, " she smiled, pulling herself deeper into his chest. 

"It is. But you could be out there with anyone."

Her face scrunched. "But I don't want to be with 'anyone.' I love _you_." She paused. "Are you trying to tell me you feel differently?"

He shook his head. "I'm thrilled that we have their blessing, more or less. I want to be with you more than anything, but I'm sorry that we can't be a real couple. I'm sorry I can't take you out and treat you right."

"Who says we aren't a real couple? What does any of that matter? You treat me great. It doesn't matter if it's outside or inside." She shrugged. 

"But I wish I could take you to dinner, or a movie, or to buy things you want. I would like to be a regular boyfriend," he sighed. 

"We can have dinner here. We can watch any movie we want. And I don't want that much," she told him honestly. 

"It's not the same."

"Who wants the same? You chose this life before me, and now I choose it with you. I'm okay. I'm better than okay because I have you, " she smiled. "Those are not the things that make a good boyfriend, believe me. I have had guys who take me places and spend money on me, but not one of them has given me an ounce of what you give me."

"Which is what?" Zeren asked skeptically.

"Your complete support and a little adoration. No one has ever believed in my career like you do. You have no idea what it means to me.”

He looked at her incredulously. “You think I only adore you a little? I’m clearly not doing enough to worship at your feet.” He hopped off the bed and got onto his knees. 

“Stop it!” she cried, grabbing his hand before he could start to bow and yanking him back to the bed. “Did you even listen to me?”

He laughed happily and squeezed both her hands. “I heard you. I’m happy you understand how much I believe in you. And that’s why I’m willing to keep this secret. I won’t get in the way of your success, I promise.” He kissed her fingers. 

“What can I do for you to show you that I love you just as much?” Qiao asked. “What are you lacking?”

“Well,” Zeren smiled, falling back onto the bed and pulling her down with him. “There was this thing you did the other night, when you pushed me against the door and you-”

She hit his chest. “Ze, I’m being serious!”

“So am I!” he laughed heartily, rubbing the spot where she hit him. “Why do you guys hit so hard?”

“Sorry,” she cooed. “We fought a lot as kids.” She rubbed gently over his chest and pressed soft kisses there. 

He smiled anyway. “You do the same for me, you know?”

“Fight?” 

“No. I mean, you support me. You build me up and make me feel good about myself and my abilities. And your existence is more than I would even know how to ask for, so I’m not lacking anything,” he assured her softly. 

“Oh!” she grinned and climbed on top of him, straddling his hips. “So, we’re the perfect couple then?”

“Mhm. Pretty much,” he agreed. 

She slipped her hands under his t-shirt and hummed, an amused smile on her face. 

“What?” He eyed her suspiciously. 

“I never get tired of these,” she said, running her fingers over his abs. 

The rest of the week passed pretty smoothly. It took another day and a half to finish Zeren’s song, and just two days for Chengcheng’s. The boys had all worked hard and Qiao was grateful to them for listening to and trusting her. By the end of it she was exhausted from the stress, but pleased with their results. She came home late on Friday from going over things with Yu Ming and flopped down on the couch next to Quanzhe. 

“We just ordered pizza, Jiejie,” Quanzhe told her as she rested her head on his leg. 

“Thanks, didi,” she groaned but didn’t move.

“You’re home!” Zeren smiled, leaning over the back of the couch to look at her, apparently not bothered by her closeness to the other man. "I have a surprise for you," Zeren said right before a knock on the door.

Qiao sat up and watched with wide-eyed excitement as he opened it.

"Oh my god, it's Yanchen!" She screamed as the tall boy with perfect teeth entered smiling and she pulled herself off the couch to see him. Zeren gave him a hug and a pat on the back.

"Yanchen, this is Zhu Zhengqiao," he introduced them.

"It's nice to meet you," she said with a slight bow. "Oh, and he has a kitten!"

"She's for you," Yanchen told her with his bright smile. He extended his arms out to hand her the small black kitten he was holding.

Her eyes grew even bigger and her jaw dropped as she accepted the small creature into her arms and held it close to her chest. 

"Zeren! Yanchen just gave me a kitten," she said in a quiet, high pitched voice. 

Zeren came close to pet the tiny animal and smiled at them both with delight.

"Well, actually the gift is from Zeren-ge. I'm just delivering her," Yanchen said, making sure to give credit where it was due.

Qiao kissed her boyfriend on the cheek as he had brought his face down to love on the kitten. "Thank you!"

"What are you going to name her?" Zeren asked, scratching behind her ears. 

Qiao didn't have to think at all. "Shadow," she told them, the name of their group when Zeren and Yanchen performed Nunchucks together. They both laughed.

"Hello, Shadow," Zeren said in a cute baby voice.

"Who would have thought that Zeren would be such a good boyfriend?" Justin said to Chengcheng behind them. 

"Oh, hey guys!" Yanchen said when he noticed them.

Qiao turned around to see them and Justin immediately moved in on the cat.

"Hey, Yanchen, long time no see. How ya been?" Chengcheng asked, giving him a bro hug.

"Good. You?" 

"Fine."

"Thanks for bringing us a cat," Justin beamed.

"He brought Qiao-jie a cat," Zeren corrected him, but the younger just ignored him. 

Qiao moved to a chair in the living room as all the boys began to come out to see what was going on.

"A kitten!" Zhengting cried when he saw it. "Where did you come from?" 

"She's a gift from Zeren," she explained.

"You know I'm allergic to cats?" Zhengting said to Zeren.

"Uh." He did know that. He also knew one of the twins' many differences was that Qiao wasn't. 

"Oh, like that's ever stopped you before," she responded.

"Never. I love kittens!" Zhengting stole the creature off her lap and held it close to him, showing her off to Wenjun.

"Fucking typical," she laughed and shook her head. 

Everyone passed around and loved on Shadow while they caught up with Yanchen.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang celebrates Chengcheng's birthday and invites some of their friends from Idol Producer. The guys are fed up with ZeQaio's excessive affection.

Qiao sat down on the floor with her cup of coffee near Zeren so she could lean on his legs while he slowly woke up. “Chengcheng’s birthday is next week. Do you guys have any idea about what we should do?” 

Zeren, Xinchun, Wenjun, Justin and Quanzhe all shared looks. 

“Well, we have a plan actually, but it’s a surprise,” Xinchun told her. 

“I like surprises,” she grinned. 

“I know, that’s why you don’t know about the surprise,” Zeren said, patting her head. 

“You don’t want me to help?” she pouted. 

“You can help!” Quanzhe told her. “You can get Chengcheng out of the apartment on Saturday so we can set up for the surprise.”

She sighed. “No, I can’t. I’m not allowed to go anywhere with you guys.”

“Oh, right...We’ll have to get Zhengting to do that. He doesn’t know anything about it, either,” Wenjun told her. 

“Why not?” she wondered. Wenjun gave her a look that said ‘Really?’ “Oh, right. Ting can’t keep a secret to save his life.”

“No. There is one other thing you can do,” Wenjun offered. She raised her eyebrows. “You can buy alcohol for us.”

She gave him a confused look. It wasn’t like they couldn’t buy alcohol. “I can do that, but why do you need me?”

“Well, none of us can really just walk into a store and buy it. And we don’t want to ask the company,” Zeren explained. 

“Oh. I guess that makes sense.” Then she started to laugh. 

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, I’m just trying to picture you guys drunk, and I can’t.”

“We’re men! We can drink!” Justin said defensively. 

“Mhm. I’m sure you can. Have any of you ever actually drank before?” she wondered. It must have been on the long list of things they couldn’t do. 

“No. But we can,” Justin insisted. 

Qiao held up her hands and tried to contain her laughter. “Okay, okay. You can. I got you covered.”

The five of them texted all the guys they knew from Idol Producer who were in or could get to Beijing for Chengcheng’s birthday party. On Saturday morning the dance studio became off limits to those who were not in on the surprise. Chengcheng was busy with a photoshoot, and Zhengting took him out for a birthday dinner for just the two of them after he finished. 

Qiao was burning with curiosity as the other boys carried mysterious bags and boxes into the studio all afternoon. Every time she tried to peak, Zeren was there to obstruct her. 

“I already know it’s a surprise party, why can’t I come in?” she groaned to him. 

“Because I want to surprise you,” he smiled. 

“Zeeeeereeeeeeeen,” she whined and squirmed. 

“I picked out an outfit for you,” he told her to distract her. She scrunched up her face at him as he pulled her into her own room. It was a black leather miniskirt and red crop top with black heeled booties. 

“Jeez, Zeren, I’ll be practically naked.” She picked up the small shirt.

“I wish. But I like you in that skirt, too,” he grinned. She sighed and he wrapped his arms around her from behind. “Tonight’s going to be fun. I promise. And I have another job for you to do.”

When it was time for guests to start coming he sent Qiao down to the lobby to show them where to go and how to get to the apartment. She was also supposed to wait for Zhengting and Chengcheng to come home and notify the guys upstairs. Most of Nine Percent showed up and she tried to contain her emotions when Kun and Ziyi walked in together. She directed them to the elevators. Xiao Gui, Linong and Yanjun came, too. Yanchen greeted her warmly for the second time. A few other guys came, bringing the total up to about twenty, including everyone who already lived there, which wasn’t bad, considering. 

Qiao sat in the lobby, waiting for her brother and the birthday boy to arrive. As soon as she spotted them she texted Zeren, and then she tried to act like she wasn’t waiting for them. 

“What are you doing down here?” Chengcheng asked when they met. 

“Oh, um…” She hadn’t prepared for this. “Zeren and I had a fight, so I was just down here to cool down,” she lied. 

Chengcheng looked at her, surprised. Those two never fought. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh, yeah. Just a small thing. It’s not important. Let’s go,” she urged and walked ahead of him to the elevator. 

Chengcheng looked at her brother, who just shrugged and followed her. 

“Happy birthday!” she remembered to say once they were inside the elevator. 

“Thanks,” he said unenthusiastically. 

“Why’s the door open?” Chengcheng wondered when they got to the apartment. 

“That’s so weird,” she mumbled. 

“Where is everyone?” he asked to the strangely empty living room. The furniture had been moved around to create a more spacious area. 

“I think Zeren dragged everyone to the studio. You know how he is. Let’s go see.”

The three of them walked down the hallway and Chengcheng slowly opened the studio door. 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” everyone yelled, raising their drinks when he came in. Chengcheng almost fell over into Qiao, who caught his back and pushed him gently forward. Someone turned off the overhead lights and turned on the colored LED and strobe lights that they guys had spent the day rigging up to create a club atmosphere. Loud music came on and everyone began dancing while Chengcheng made his way through the crowd, greeting friends and accepting their felicitations. 

Zeren made his way through the crowd in the opposite direction to come to Qiao where she and Zhengting were still standing in the doorway, taking it all in. 

“This was the surprise?” she asked, looking genuinely surprised. 

Wenjun joined them to meet Zhengting. Wenjun and Zeren looked at each other. 

“We never get to go out,” Zeren told her. “We just thought it could be like a date night thing. Pretend like we aren’t in our apartment,” he laughed. 

Qiao smiled. “I like this surprise.”

“Come on. Let’s dance,” Zeren said over the music and pulled her by the hand to join the dance floor while Wenjun and Zhengting went to the kitchen to make drinks. They danced for a long time to the playlist Zeren had made, which included songs she had introduced him to and the one she had written for UNIQ among his favorite dubstep and others, until she was tired and went to the kitchen for a drink and to take a break. Chengcheng was there making a drink, too. 

“Hey, birthday boy!” she said cheerfully. 

“Hey!” he smiled. 

“Are you having a good time?” she asked, pleasantly surprised to see him smile. 

“I am, actually. Thank you.” He screwed the lid back on a bottle of vodka. 

“I did practically nothing,” she admitted. “Except the alcohol. I did do that.” He lifted his plastic cup, took a sip and gagged. Qiao erupted in laughter. “What did you make?”

“I honestly don’t know,” he said, still gagging, Qiao still laughing. 

“Let me see.” She took his cup and sipped. “Oh, god, that’s strong.”

“Here.” He took the cup and was going to pour it out. 

“Eh! No. Don’t waste it!” She took the drink back from him. “I’ll make you a drink. Give me this one.” She continued to laugh while she mixed him a rum and coke, light on the rum, and he rinsed his mouth out with water. “I listened to your EP today,” she told him. 

“Really?”

“Yeah. It’s good. I really liked Missed Texts.” She stirred his drink and handed it to him before she tried to fix the one he had over poured. 

“Thanks. That means a lot to me coming from you.” He smiled again. 

“Cheers,” she said, and tapped her cup with his. She took a big gulp of her drink. It was still awful, but she could take it. She had trained for many years in South Korea. 

“Hey, guys!” Zeren greeted, crashing enthusiastically into the kitchen. “Happy birthday, bro!” he said, clapping a hand on Chengcheng’s shoulder. 

“Thanks, gege. Great party. I’m gonna head back.” He took his drink and walked back to the studio smiling. 

“I think you did a good job. He seems happy,” Qiao told Zeren. 

“I’m glad. Are you having a good time?” he asked, taking her cup. She tried to stop him, but couldn’t get the words out fast enough. He almost spit the drink back out, but he forced himself to swallow it. She was laughing again. “That’s awful. What did you do?”

“It was not me. It was Chengcheng.” Zeren turned to dump it out in the sink. “Hey! Don’t be wasteful. You guys are such babies.”

“That cannot be good for you,” he said, sticking his tongue out. 

“It’s fine. You want a drink?” She took a drink and worked really hard not to react to the harshness, just to prove a point. He nodded and reached for a bottle. “I got it. You’ll end up just like Cheng-ge.” She poured a cup mostly of orange juice and splashed a little vodka in it. 

“Hey. I’m not a baby,” he complained. She squinted at him and sucked air through her teeth, but Zeren stared her down until she added another splash.

“Try it first,” she said and handed him the cup. 

“It’s good.” He smiled. 

“Yeah.” She reached up to pat him on the head. With quick reflexes he grabbed her wrist and brought her hand back down, folding it carefully behind her back so he could pull her close. Her body was flush against his, their lips coming together. “Don’t you wanna go back to the dance floor?” she asked, holding her lips an inch away from his as they reached for her. 

“Not yet.” 

“Why not?” 

“Too many dicks on the dance floor.”

She laughed. He set his drink down on the counter, pushing her back and pinning her between his body and the counter. Unable to escape anymore, he trapped her lips in a kiss. He let go of her arm so she could wrap her arms around his neck while they made out. 

“Can’t you guys get a room?” Xinchun asked, Li Xikan at his back. 

“You complain when we never come out of the room. You complain when we’re out of the room. Make up your mind man,” Zeren laughed, turning to the pair. 

“Xikan, I’m sorry you had to see that. Now you know what my life is like,” Xinchun said to his friend. 

“You weren’t kidding,” Xikan said, face blank. 

“This is Zhu Zhengqiao, Zhengting’s sister. And Zeren’s...you know…” Xinchun said vaguely. 

“We met earlier,” Qiao said. “You guys want a drink?”

“Are you going to stay here and play bartender?” Zeren asked, hand on her back. 

“For a little while. I worry what might happen to you guys if I don’t,” she admitted. “You can go back in if you want, and I’ll join you in a bit.” She started making them drinks.

“Oh, no. If I leave, the next guy to walk in here will be Yanjun, and I am not leaving you alone with him.” Zeren shook his head and took a drink. 

“What? Why?”

“Because you said he’s your bias, and I know how you treat your biases.”

Her eyes opened wide and her mouth fell open. “First of all, that is so unfair. Second, when did I ever say that?”

“The first day you got here. Quanzhe asked you who your bias was and you said Yanjun. Oh, and that reminds me you said Ziyi, too!”

“Oh my god. I can’t believe you remember that. I forgot I even said it. I was joking!” She stirred the two cups and handed them off to Xinchun and Xikan. “You’re my only bias, baby.”

Xinchun and Xikan looked at each other. “Let’s get out of here before they start again,” Xikan said. 

“Thanks for the drinks, Qiao,” Xinchun said, and they disappeared down the hallway. 

“Are you done now?” Zeren asked, not impatiently. 

“Hold on, I’ll just make a few drinks that anyone can come and grab.” He stood beside her and watched. 

Sure enough, Yanjun was the next guy to come in. Zeren straightened up and Qiao rolled her eyes. 

“Hey,” Yanjun said, leaning against the entrance to the kitchen. “Are you the bartender?” 

“Yep, what can I get you?” she smiled. 

“Chengcheng said you make a good rum and coke,” he smiled back, charmingly, trying on purpose to flirt with her after Xinchun had told him what Zeren had said. 

Qiao laughed at the weak rum and coke she had made Chengcheng and made a stronger one. “Here you go.” She glanced at Zeren and then back at Yanjun before stepping toward him to hand him his drink. “Anything else I can get you?” she asked sweetly. 

Zeren reached out and grabbed the back of her miniskirt at the waist, pulling her back to him. “This is exactly what I was talking about!” He pulled Qiao close to prove she was his. Yanjun and Qiao both laughed. Yanjun thanked her and walked away.

“I’m just messing with you, Ze. You know you’re my one and only.” She kissed him on the cheek. 

“Don’t make me stop this party, take you to my room and show you who your man is,” he said in her ear, almost growling. 

“Threats or promises?” she grinned. 

“Promises.” Zeren smirked. He put his hands on her leather-clad hips and pushed her backwards toward the kitchen doorway, kissing her. She backed right into Wang Ziyi. Xukun was at his side. 

“We heard we were playing seven minutes in heaven in here,” Ziyi said, looking down at Qiao, who giggled. 

“No, it was spin the bottle,” Xukun added. 

“Oh, hell no!” Zeren cried. 

“C’mon, Zeren. You should share. I heard I was her bias,” Ziyi said, winking at her. 

“I swear to god, Ziyi. Dance battle now!” Zeren demanded, not knowing any other way to settle his rivalries. Ziyi and Xukun busted out in laughter. Qiao realized they were messing with him, too. Xinchun must have told everyone to torture Zeren. She was starting to feel the effects of that drink Chengcheng had made, which she’d nearly finished by now. 

“Oh. I get it. Everyone’s fucking with me, aren’t they?” Zeren sighed, looking at the floor. 

“Yeah, pretty much,” Xukun admitted. 

“It’s your own fault,” Qiao told him. 

“Why?”

“You brought the only girl to the party, and you made me wear this,” she replied, holding out her arms. 

“Yeah, I may have made some mistakes,” he admitted. “I have no regrets though.” Zeren grabbed his girl’s waist again and pulled her in for a gratuitous kiss, with the aim of driving off the other guys. 

“Hey. You called dance battle. Get your ass on the floor, Ding-ge,” Ziyi told him. 

“Wait. I actually came here for drinks,” Kun whined. 

She made them all fresh drinks and they went back down to the studio. Kun privately told Xiao Gui to pick a song for the dance battle, then he turned down the music. 

“Hey everyone! Ding Zeren has challenged Wang Ziyi to a dance battle in defense of his woman.” Everyone turned their eyes on Qiao, who covered her face with her hands and laughed. Her face turned bright red, but no one noticed in the flashing, multicolored lights. 

“What does the winner get?” Linong asked from the back of the crowd. 

“Great question!” Kun yelled back and thought for a moment. “The winner gets a kiss from the woman in question.”

“Hey! That’s my sister!” Zhengting yelled from the corner. 

“Good thing you’re not competing then,” Kun yelled back and everyone laughed. 

“Qiao-jie has to agree,” Quanzhe said sensibly. 

Everyone looked at her again. Zeren swallowed hard. He may not have fully thought this through. Qiao looked back at Zeren. She had every confidence he would be better, but she didn’t know if everyone else would play fair. She was drunk now though, whatever lethal mixture Chengcheng had made was hitting her hard now. She shrugged. 

“You’d better win,” she grinned at Zeren. 

Everyone cheered and clapped and made space in the middle of the floor. Zeren took a sip of his drink and handed it over to her. He kissed her on the cheek. “I got this,” he said in her ear. 

He wasn’t as confident as he pretended to be though. For one thing, Ziyi was a very good dancer. For another, he had started to feel like he’d put a target on his own back.

“Ready, Xiao Gui?” Kun asked. 

“Ready,” he confirmed. He turned the music back up. 

Ziyi went first. The battle was fierce and lively. Everyone cheered as Zeren pulled out his best moves. They were pretty equal, and that worried Qiao, because if Zeren was clearly better they would have had a harder time going against him. But she felt like they would choose Ziyi just for the scandal. Sure enough, that’s how it turned out, with only Qiao, Zhengting, Wenjun, Quanzhe, Yanchen and Linong voting for Zeren. 

Ziyi grinned as Kun announced him the winner, and Qiao frowned as she walked to the center where they were standing, both breathing heavy. She looked apologetically at Zeren, who looked on, jaw clenched. Ziyi smiled at her and then pointed to his cheek. She touched his cheek just barely with her lips. Justin yelled. Everyone laughed, except Zeren. He grabbed Qiao’s wrist and pulled her out of the room as Xiao Gui turned the music back up. 

“Ze, don’t be mad,” she begged as he pulled her into his room and closed and locked the door. 

“What the hell?” he said, not quite yelling, but clearly upset. 

“What was I supposed to do? I barely touched him.” She tried not to tell him that it was his fault for starting his whole jealousy thing in the first place. But she knew he was a little jealous by nature, and she was kind of annoyed with Xinchun for starting the whole thing. “Baby, they’re just having fun at your expense, okay? They’re only enjoying it the more upset you are.” 

“I-” Zeren was so mad he couldn’t even find the words. “You didn’t have to go along with them! You wanted to!”

“What exactly are you accusing me of?” she asked, becoming more defensive than she wanted to be. 

“You were flirting with them!”

“I flirt with everyone. You said it didn’t bother you.” Her voice was much softer than his. She felt small.

“That was different.”

“Yeah, because I was joking. Okay, I did it on purpose. But I did it ironically. Can you honestly not tell the difference?” 

“You’re mine, remember?” He knew he was being possessive and jealous, and he hated himself a little for it, but he couldn’t help what was in his heart. Somewhere this had all gone out of his control, and he hated that, too. He breathed deeply and exhaled loudly and just stared at her because he didn’t know what else to say.

She stepped in close to him and reached her hands up to run her fingers through his hair. In the shoes he’d picked for her she was almost as tall as him, and she pulled his face toward her own until their foreheads touched. “Yes. I’m all yours. I haven’t forgotten. You’re my one and only,” she breathed. 

He stood still, hands at his sides. She kissed the corner of his mouth gently. She kissed his lips, but he didn’t kiss back. Her lips wandered across his jawbone until she got to his ear. 

“Don’t be mad,” she whispered. “They’re just venting their jealousy.” She nibbled on his ear. 

“You think they’re jealous?” he asked as she kissed his neck. She hummed. “They should be,” he moaned as she sucked gently on the spot he liked. He lifted his hands and placed them at the bare part of her back. Qiao brought her lips back to his mouth, and this time he responded appropriately. His hands wandered farther up her back, under her shirt, while hers went to his belt. She unbuckled it smoothly and untucked his shirt. She slid her hand into his pants to stroke his half-hard cock.

“What are you doing, baby?” Zeren wondered between kisses. 

“I just want to remind you why you shouldn’t be jealous of anyone else,” she replied and dropped to her knees. 

He hardened instantly at her words and exhaled shakily as she pulled down his pants. “Fuck, Qiao,” he moaned as she stroked his shaft with her hand and teased the tip of his cock with her tongue. She took him in her mouth and sucked until she popped off. 

“Who’s my one and only?” she asked. 

“Oh fuck,” he whined as she took him in again. “I am,” he said as she glided all the way down his shaft and started to pump a steady rhythm. He ran his fingers through her hair to grip her head while she sucked and licked him. 

“You think they’ll be okay?” Zhengting asked Wenjun in the dark corner they’d been occupying for most of the night. 

“Zeren’s definitely the jealous type, but if anyone can make it better, it’s your sister. She’s impossible to stay mad at,” Wenjun reasoned. 

“We have that in common,” Zhengting said, giving his boyfriend a cute smile. 

“Meh,” Wenjun shrugged. Zhengting hit him. “Just kidding.” Wenjun kissed him sweetly. 

“You think they went off to fight or fuck?” Kun asked Ziyi, Xinchun, Xikan, Justin and Chengcheng as they stood in a group on one side of the room. Everyone else had started dancing again. 

“Do you think we went too far?” Ziyi asked. It hadn’t been his intention to make Zeren mad. He only wanted to tease him. 

“Zeren just has a short fuse. Even if he was mad, they’re probably already having makeup sex by now,” Xinchun said, rolling his eyes. Sometimes it seemed like all they did was fuck. 

Quanzhe walked up to the group, hitting Xinchun, Justin and Chengcheng. “How could you do that?”

“What? It’s just a little fun at Zeren’s expense. It’s my birthday,” Chengcheng shrugged and took a drink. 

“It was just at his expense. It was at Qiao’s expense, too,” Quanzhe said angrily. 

“She went along with it,” Justin argued. 

“That’s because she can’t stand to disappoint anyone and everyone was staring at her. God, you don’t know anything.” Quanzhe stormed out of the room. 

Justin and Chengcheng looked at each and frowned. They hadn’t thought of implicating Qiao. 

Zeren tucked in his shirt and zipped up his pants while Qiao ran her fingers through and shook out her hair. Zeren reached to the dresser and grabbed her lipstick and held it out to her. She squeezed her eyes shut and laughed, then went to the mirror. She was still fairly drunk, but did her best to fix her makeup. He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. 

“You didn’t have to do that. I’m sorry for getting mad. I should know you better than that.” He squeezed her. “But, I’m still annoyed with them.”

“Don’t be,” she sighed. “I really think they were just trying to let off some steam. We’ve been pretty crazy recently, and they’ve been stuck here with us. They’re having a good time tonight. Let it go so we can have a good time, too.” She leaned her head against his and looked at him in the mirror. 

“You’re right. You’re always right. I’ll try to let it go,” he said after a moment. His anger toward the guys hadn’t really dissipated much at all, and it would take some time, but he had worked hard on getting this night with her, and he didn’t want to let his mood ruin a good time. 

They went hand in hand out of the room to the kitchen to find something to eat. Someone had had the forethought to order pizza, and it had arrived while they were away in the room. Xinchun, Chengcheng, Quanzhe and Justin were all standing in the kitchen waiting for them, while others were taking advantage of the living room to rest and eat. 

“What’s up guys?” Qiao asked cooly as she approached them, standing beside the pizza. 

“Er, well, I guess we should apologize,” Justin started. 

“We shouldn’t have tried to make Zeren jealous and put you in that position, Qiao,” Chengcheng said. Qiao laughed involuntarily at the word position, but quickly regained her composure. 

“Sorry,” Xinchun said when Quanzhe nudged him. 

Qiao looked at Zeren. He sighed. “Apology accepted,” he said. 

“Can we get pizza now?” Qiao asked, pointing to the boxes behind them. They moved aside and Qiao’s expression lifted. 

They carried on drinking and dancing for a few more hours, and most of them ended up spending the night, sleeping on the couches, spare beds or the floor. 

Qiao woke up early to the sound of meowing. She reached down and felt Shadow's soft fur. Qiao picked her up and brought the kitten into her chest. Zeren rolled over and wrapped an arm around Qiao's waist to pet Shadow. He kissed her shoulder. Qiao held the creature close and rolled over to face him.

"Good morning," she whispered. Zeren looked over her shoulder to see Yanchen still sleeping on Wenjun's bed that never got used anymore.

"Good morning," Zeren whispered to Shadow, scratching behind her ears.

Qiao pouted. "Are you still mad at me?"

"No," he said and scratched behind her ears. "Good morning to you, too."

She smiled. “I’m going to go make pancakes.”

“Hold on,” Zeren said before she could move. He carefully picked up Shadow and moved her behind Qiao’s legs, and then pulled Qiao into a tight embrace. She leaned into him, feeling happy. He breathed the scent from the top of her head. “I just want to keep you here for a minute,” he whispered, and she agreed. 

A few minutes later he pulled away so he could look at her. “I feel really bad about yelling at you last night. I’m sorry.”

“Thank you,” she replied. 

“I love you so much,” he sighed, as if that summed up all his behavior. 

“I know. Just try to remember that I love you, too. And what other people do is irrelevant to that.”

He really wanted to kiss her passionately then, pull her on top of him and do something dirty. But he remembered that his friend was in the room, so he settled for a short sweet kiss and then let her go make breakfast. 

The couple moved as quietly as possible around the kitchen, simultaneously cleaning up from the night before while making breakfast and coffee. Slowly various boys found their way toward the kitchen, lured by the smells and the quiet conversations, until one by one they’d all eaten and shuffled their way out of the apartment, and it was just the eight of them again.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiao's writin' some more hits. Ding Zeren is literally the best boyfriend ever.

After Chengcheng’s party the group began to break up again, going off in their separate directions to film various shows, until it was only Quanzhe, Zeren and Qiao left in the apartment just a few days later. 

Qiao threw herself into her work. After finishing the first two songs completely she had given herself a few days of rest, but now it was time to get down to business. She had plenty of lyrics worked out, but it was music she needed, and for that she shut herself away for hours, not letting anyone hear a note until she was sure of herself. 

Zeren tried not to worry about her reclusive behavior. He brought her meals regularly, since she seemed to be able to work for hours on end without realizing she was hungry. He reminded her to eat and sleep, but it took a lot of coaxing to get her to leave her work to come to bed. He wanted desperately to hear what she was doing, to be involved, but he did his best to respect her space. He and Quanzhe spent several days just playing video games with nothing else to do until the afternoon when Qiao finally approached them in the living room.

She tapped Zeren on the shoulder and he paused their game. “Do you want to hear my song?” she asked quietly, as if there was actually some doubt in her mind that he would be interested. 

“Yes!” he nearly yelled and jumped up from the couch, ready to go to the studio to listen to her. His enthusiasm surprised and touched her. 

“You can sit down,” she told him. She’d brought her laptop with her and set it down on the coffee table to play the recording. 

“Wait. When did you record this? We didn’t even hear you,” Quanzhe said, perplexed. 

“In the middle of the night last night,” she admitted, blushing. 

“So shy,” Zeren laughed, endeared, and mussed her hair. 

“Do you want to hear it or not?” she asked impatiently. 

“Yes!” they both said and Zeren hit play before she could change her mind. 

“That’s a groove,” Quanzhe said when it was over. "And your Korean is pretty good!"

“That’s the one you wrote on the plane?” Zeren asked. 

Qiao nodded. “Do you think Du Hua will like it for Everglow?”

“She’ll love it!” Quanzhe cheered. “But you have such a nice voice, I wish you could sing it yourself.”

“Oh, god, no,” Qiao shook her head. “That’s what we won’t be doing.”

“C’mon Qiao-jie, sing for us,” Quanzhe pleaded. 

Zeren joined in, and when she continued to refuse he began to tickle her sides until she started laughing uncontrollably and flopping about. She begged him to stop, and when he finally did he pulled her against him and kissed her head. 

“It’s good to hear you laugh,” he told her. “We missed you.”

“I was working hard.”

“Don’t work too hard, Qiao-jie. You have to remember to take care of yourself,’ Quanzhe reminded her

“The harder you work, the luckier you are.”

“Don’t you think you’re lucky enough?” Zeren asked, brushing hair off her cheek.

She looked up at his face hovering above hers. “Almost,” she said, thinking out loud. “I want a nap now.”

“Wanna go to bed?” Zeren asked. 

“No. I’ll sleep here. You can play your game.” She adjusted so she could lay her head at the other end of the couch and put her feet on him, and she soon fell asleep. 

When Qiao woke up Zeren had wedged himself between her and the back of the couch, draping his arm over her. He wasn’t sleeping, just enjoying holding her. He had noticed she was gone in the middle of the night, so he considered this making up lost time. He noticed her stirring and took the opportunity to get his other arm under her. 

“Hey,” she said groggily, rubbing her eyes. 

“Hey,” he responded quietly. 

“How long have I been asleep?” It felt like a long time. 

“Just a couple of hours.”

“Have you been watching me all this time?”

“Not the whole time,” he smiled. 

Qiao sat up and stretched, and he sat up with her. “I should get back to work,” she groaned as she stretched. She leaned forward like she was going to stand up, but Zeren put his hand on her arm to hold her back. 

“You should take the night off. You just finished a song.”

“Yeah, but I have others I’m working on that need to be finished,” she told him, and he could hear the stress in her voice.

“Qiao, you’ve been going non-stop, not sleeping. You need to rest, too.” His voice was thick with concern as he looked at her with soft eyes. She searched her mind for a reason she really needed to get back to it, but she didn’t have any other than she was pressuring herself. She was actually stuck where she was at, and that was making her more anxious to get it done. He watched her come up with nothing, but could see the worry in her eyes. “If you really need to go work, I won’t stand in the way of your creative process. But if you can put it off until tomorrow, you can consider it a personal favor to me to make dinner with me and have a nice evening of watching movies and cuddling.”

“Well,” she smiled, “I can’t say no to that.”

“Good,” he beamed. “Cause I’m starving.” 

He pulled her off the couch and into the kitchen. She made his favorite kung pao chicken, and he helped by making rice and stir-fried vegetables. 

“Why don’t you let me hear what you’re working on instead of sneaking out of bed in the middle of the night?” Zeren wondered, trying to sound casual about it and hoping he wasn’t starting a fight. 

Qiao tensed momentarily, worrying that he was angry about that, but she got the sense that wasn’t his emotion. She didn’t like the way he said ‘sneaking,’ but she couldn’t deny that she was trying to hide. She shrugged. “I just never feel sure of myself until it’s done. Until it’s finished, I’m not sure if it’s any good or total crap.”

“Qiao, I’ve written a song with you. At no point was it crap. You’re very talented. You should have more confidence in yourself.”

“I don’t know. I guess, I don’t want to be observed making a mistake,” she admitted. 

“Don’t you trust me?” he wondered. “Do you really think I would think you’re any less talented or incredible if you made a mistake?”

She looked at him seriously for a moment. “I trust you.” She thought about it while she cooked the chicken. “I’ll show you what I’m working on tomorrow to prove it to you.”

Zeren shook his head. “You don’t have to prove it to me. I just want you to know you don’t have to hide from me. If you need help or support, I’m here. That should go without saying. But I’m also interested.”

“I appreciate that,” she smiled and stirred. 

Zeren kissed her on the cheek and went to set the table. He made sure to set a place to Quanzhe, too. They’d gotten closer recently as Zeren noticed how supportive he was of Qiao and of their relationship. He knew Quanzhe was the one who had stuck up for her on the night of the party, and he was grateful. 

The next day she did play what she had of two other songs for him. One he knew was the one she had written with Xinchun and some of the other guys while he was gone. It was almost done. The other was maybe half a tune she had been working on, just an idea, she said. It was a cute song about a jealous boy who thinks everyone is after his girlfriend. 

“You wrote a song about yourself,” Zeren laughed, but not in a mocking way. 

“No. I wrote a song about you,” she said, and he laughed more. “But that’s as far as I’ve gotten.”

“Maybe I can help,” he offered, amused she’d turned his tantrum from the other night into something nice. He was going to do his best to make it about her. He picked up her notebook and looked at her lyrics. She was happy he wasn’t offended by her song, so she accepted. He took her lyrics and went away so she could continue to work on other things.

Zeren came back a few hours later with new lyrics, just after she’d finished working out the bridge for the other one. She read them over carefully and then smiled at him and rolled her eyes dramatically. “You wrote a song about me.” 

He grinned silently and sat beside her on the bench. She grabbed a pen and wrote at the top of the page: She’s Mine by Ding Zeren and Zhu Zhengqiao

Zeren leaned his head on her shoulder, his smile immovable. 

“Do you want to dance? I know I’ve been monopolizing the studio this week. I’m sorry,” she said quietly. 

His head snapped back up. “Dancing! Yes. That’s a great idea.” He stood and pulled her with him. “I haven’t given you a good workout in the studio in weeks.” 

“Oh, no. I didn’t mean-”

“No. You said it. They were your words. You can’t take them back.” He was taking his phone out of his pocket and hooking it up for music, and she could see there was no way out of it. But she didn’t mind, because at least he would be happy. Zeren put on “GIRL LIKE ME.”

“What is this?” she wondered. 

“You’ve been so busy you haven’t even heard the new Shakira song,” Zeren said, shaking his head. 

She laughed at how he’d changed, but was also still ever himself. It was amazing how much two people could affect each other in such a short period of time. 

By the time Qiao had all three songs where she wanted them, tracks recorded, lyrics types, instrumentals neatly composed, and she called the office, Du Hua was out of the country on business. But the secretary said she could send the songs in and the boss would get back to her as soon as possible. That was better, Qiao thought, than sitting across the room from her while she listened. Three songs had taken a lot of energy out of Qiao. Zhengting was probably using a lot of it, too, filming in Chongqing with Wenjun. And anything that was left was going to Zeren, either in the studio or in bed. So, she gave herself a break and waited for a call from Du Hua, which came about a week later, telling her to come into the office. Qiao remembered to bring those cookies she liked. 

“You’ve been a busy girl,” Du Hua said when Qiao was shown into her office. Qiao smiled bashfully. “And you don’t look like you’ve been called into the principal’s office for once,” the boss laughed. 

“I think I’ve been behaving pretty well recently,” Qiao admitted. 

“I have no complaints. Sit, so we can talk about your songs.” She did as she was told and felt encouraged by the older woman’s tone. “I loved ‘Mama’. It was really sweet. It’s really going to earn some of those good son points.” Qiao smiled, thinking of how Xinchun would be gratified by that. “The Everglow song is really well composed. I’d like you to go to Seoul to produce it with them, but you’ll have to pay your own way.”

Qiao gulped. She wasn’t sure she would be able to do that. Yuehua had managed to take advantage of her naivete to negotiate a pretty harsh contract with her to write for them for the next year, and were using letting her live in their apartment as an excuse not to pay her enough for her songs, at least not until the album was done and she would receive royalties. “I’ll see what I can do,” she said. 

“Let me know soon,” the older woman replied, her face blank of expression. “You know, it’s a shame we didn’t recruit you when you were younger. You have a wonderful voice,” Du Hua said, a bit regretfully. 

“I’m more of a musician than a performer,” Qiao said, dismissing the idea.

Du Hua shrugged. “And that just leaves ‘She’s Mine’.” Another gulp from Qiao. She had worried that would be a point of contention. “It’s a very catchy song. Cute. I think people will really like it. We just can’t publish it with Zeren’s name and yours attached together.”

“What does that mean?”

“I’ve thought a lot about it. We could give it to another group. But I think it would make a strong contribution to the album. Bottom line though, one of your names has to come off, and I don’t think anyone would believe that he wrote it himself.”

Qiao huffed a little laugh. “I’ll talk to him about it and get back to you.” She didn’t think Zeren would have a problem giving up the writing credit, but she would feel bad about it. 

She left the Yuehua building feeling a lot more stressed than she had expected. She walked back toward home thinking about what was in her bank account and how it probably wouldn’t be enough to get her to South Korea within the time frame that Du Hua had proposed. She’d made barely enough to live while she was working in Seoul, and whatever she had saved was practically all used up by coming to Beijing. She’d worked her whole way through college while her mom tried to help Zhengting pursue his dreams and take care of herself. And now she still had almost no money to show for what she honestly felt was a respectable career, even if it was just starting out. But she wasn’t any good at negotiating and she was even worse at business, and it all seemed pretty late for it now. She had just gotten her MCSC membership approved the day before going into the recording studio and wouldn’t be seeing anything for the songs she had written so far until they were released, and the royalties she was getting from UNIQ’s songs weren’t as big as she'd hoped after she had to split the writing credit with others. 

When she got home she could hear Zeren in the studio. She stood in the hallway outside their bedroom door, hesitating, but she wasn’t ready to face him yet. Shadow appeared, rubbing herself on Qiao’s ankles, so she picked up the animal and laid down on their bed and started to look at plane tickets. Maybe if she opened another credit card and slept on Jung-hee’s couch she could make it. Maybe she could ask her mom for a little help for the first time in all these years. She didn’t notice when the music coming from down the hall stopped. Suddenly, Zeren was sitting on the bed beside her. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were home? How did it go?” he asked, and she could tell he was already concerned. 

She sighed. “I’m just trying to work things out,” she mumbled.

“What’s wrong? Did she not like the songs?” He didn’t think that was possible. Shadow wandered from Qiao’s stomach to her daddy’s lap.

Qiao sat up to face him. “No. She liked them. She thought your song was really catchy and she said it would be great on the album.”

“Then what’s wrong?”

Qiao took a deep breath and pushed it out through her nose. “She wants to take your name off of it. I guess she’s worried we’d give ourselves away.”

Zeren put his hand on top of her head. “That’s no problem. I don’t care.”

“Are you sure?” She looked at him with soft eyes. 

“You’re the songwriter, Qiao, not me. I honestly just wrote the lines to make you laugh. I didn’t even think you’d actually accept them. I don’t care about the credit.” He smiled lovingly at her. 

“If you’re sure.” She looked down at her hands. She’d known he wouldn’t really care. 

“Okay. Now what’s actually bothering you?” he wondered. 

She didn’t quite know how to start. She didn’t want to talk about money or how she was struggling with him. She didn’t want to sound pathetic. 

“I can help you,” he offered after she told him the situation, without all the unnecessary details. 

“I can’t accept that,” she told him. She hadn’t even considered asking for his help, but she knew it didn’t feel right. 

“Why not?”

“It’s too much. I can’t take money from you.” She shook her head emphatically. 

“It’s just a plane ticket, Qiao. It’s not that big of a deal.” 

Qiao buried her face in her arms to hide her tears of shame. He scooted closer to her on the bed so he could stroke her arms. 

“Baby, it’s okay,” he soothed softly.

“Why would you do that?” she wondered, her voice choking back sobs. 

“Because I believe in your career, and I don’t want you to miss out on this opportunity.”

“Really?” she sniffed. 

He smiled. “Are you kidding? You’re so freaking talented, it blows my mind. I thought you knew just how amazing I think you are. It’s frankly insane that Du mama isn’t paying you and begging you to go produce that song. But if I could do this small thing to promote your career, I would consider it an investment.”

“You would really do that?” She looked up at him with a tear-streaked face. 

He reached out and gently wiped her cheek. “Of course I would.”

“Would you do it if I wasn’t your girlfriend?” she asked. 

He gave it a moment of serious thought, knowing that she wouldn’t accept a quick answer. “If you were just my extremely talented friend, yes, I would.”

She sniffed and considered his offer for a minute. “If you’re sure, then I’ll pay you back when I get paid for our album.”

“If you insist,” he shrugged. “Just no more crying, okay? I can’t stand it.” He moved closer so he could wrap his arms around her. “I’m here for you. Anytime. I’ll do anything I can to help.” He kissed her hair. 

Qiao wiped her remaining tears away. She asked Zeren about what he was working on and the two chatted for hours about what they wanted for their careers. By the end of the day they were both convinced that she was going to be the greatest female producer China had ever seen, and he would be the king of dance. It actually sounded like a beautiful future.


	20. Chapter 20

Although it was quiet around the apartment, it seemed things were starting to move fast. Qiao made plans to go to Seoul for a week in July to record the song with Everglow and return just in time for the Yuehua family concert, when the single would debut with a live performance. Zeren and Quanzhe were given the responsibility of creating the stage choreography, in part because they had little else to do aside from the odd photoshoot and interview. Qiao took a break from writing to help them work out and record the choreography, which they then sent to the other members so they could learn it before the show. 

Before she could believe it, Qiao was on her way back to Seoul. She had actually recorded the keyboard parts on all of Everglow’s songs up until she left, but she had never met them before. The day she arrived she met with many of her former co-workers to record the instrumental tracks for the song. It wasn’t until a couple of days later that she actually met with the girls. They walked curiously into the practice room, surprised to see only Qiao there. She stood to greet them. 

“Are you the producer?” Aisha asked. 

“Yes,” Qiao smiled. “I’m Zhu Zhengqiao, but you can just call me Qiao,” she told them, bowing. 

“Wow, you’re so young,” E:U, the oldest, marveled, although she was only a few days younger than Xinchun. 

“I’m actually older than all of you,” Qiao laughed. 

“Still, you’re so young,” Sihyeon agreed. “And for a woman.”

Qiao gulped. She was starting to feel nervous. 

“Oh, don’t get them wrong!” Yiren told her, sensing her tension. “They’re impressed.”

“Yes! We love your song. We’re so excited!” Sihyeon agreed. 

“Great!” Qiao smiled again, relieved. “Let’s get started.”

Qiao took them through the song and they assigned parts. 

“This song is so sweet. Is this song about your boyfriend?” Onda asked. 

“No,” Qiao lied, blushing a little. 

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Mia wondered. 

Everyone stared at Qiao while she shook her head and looked away. 

“Yes you do! Your face is red!” cried Sihyeon.

“What’s it like to have a boyfriend?” Yiren asked.

Qiao shrugged. “Depends on the boyfriend.”

“Is your boyfriend nice?” E:U asked quickly. 

“Very,” Qiao replied before she had a chance to stop herself. 

“Aha! I knew you were lying!” Yiren yelled, clapping her hands. 

“I don’t, really! We aren’t official,” Qiao mumbled. At least that was partially true.

“It doesn’t matter. Does he know you wrote this song about him?” Onda asked, making Qiao blush deeper. 

“Yes,” she mumbled, and all the girls giggled. Qiao covered her face and smiled. “Okay, okay! Enough about me. Let’s get to work.”

After a day of rehearsal and two days in the studio, Qiao spent a very long day and night alone mixing the track, but was feeling stuck. No matter how many times she listened to it she felt something was missing, but she didn’t know what. So, thinking of things that were missing, she decided to call Zeren. She hadn’t really thought about how late it was--a little after midnight--until the phone was already ringing, but he answered. 

“Hey, babe,” Zeren greeted, holding the phone between his shoulder and his ear while he played a game with Quanzhe. 

“Hey, are you still up?” She rubbed her eyes, suddenly realizing how long she’d been staring at a screen. 

“Yep. I’m here with lil ham. Say hi.”

“Hi, Qiao-jie,” Quanzhe said brightly. 

“Hey, didi.” She sighed unintentionally. “If you’re busy we can talk tomorrow.”

Zeren paused the game. “Nope. Not busy. Is something wrong?” He stood and walked to his room, leaving Quanzhe watching him curiously.

“Not wrong. Just...not right,” she groaned. 

“Have you been in the studio all day? Maybe you need to go take a walk or eat, or, and I know this is a wild idea, but maybe get a good night’s sleep.” He was only a little teasing and mostly concerned. 

Qiao laughed. “That’s not a terrible idea,” she admitted. “You know how I am.”

“I do. You’re helpless without me. You need me to take care of you.” He smiled in spite of his worries. He really liked being able to take care of her. 

“You do take very good care of me,” she agreed. She sighed again. “I’ll go get something to eat if you’ll take a listen for me.”

His smile widened. “You want me to listen to your unfinished song?”

“Yes,” she mumbled, imagining his smug smile. 

“Of course, I will listen.” He laid on his bed and waited patiently while she put him on speaker and played the track. He listened to the full song before he said anything. “It’s coming along really nice, Qiao. The vocals are great. But there does seem to be something missing,” he admitted. 

“I think so, too. I’m just not sure what.”

“Can you play it from the beginning again?” he requested, and she started it over. “There!” he said loudly over the music, and she quickly stopped the playback. 

“What?”

“There at the drop, when the intro goes into the chorus, it just needs...something. Like a…” He made a noise that caused her to smile. 

“Okay, give me a minute.” She searched through a catalog of electronic sounds until she found the one that sounded like he had described and added it in. She played it back again. 

“Exactly.” She continued to let it play and he gave her another suggestion or two. 

“Thank you,” she said with a sigh of relief. “You know just how to fix things.”

“I didn’t do anything you couldn’t have done if you were well-fed and well-rested.” He really wished he could be there to force her to take care of herself. 

“I hear you. I’m packing up now to go back to Jung-hee’s, and I’ll focus on it tomorrow with fresh ears.” She saved her work and powered down the computer, keeping her word. She left the studio and walked down the empty hallways of the Yuehua building.

“Thank you,” he said, as if she were doing him some kind of favor. 

“Thank you, Ze, really. I appreciate your help.” 

“Anytime. You know that.” They both smiled. “Will you be okay getting home? It’s late.”

“I’ll be okay. It isn’t that far. I’ll text you when I’m there so you won’t worry.” 

He wanted to ask her to stay on the phone, but he thought it was probably even less safe for her to be distracted. “Okay. Don’t forget.”

The song was done to Qiao’s satisfaction, and she felt good about what the group had dubbed their “girl power song,” since it was an all female production. She ended up flying back to Beijing with all of them as they were also going to the Yuehua family concert, too. 

“Are you excited to see your boyfriend?” Aishia asked, bumping her intentionally with her hip as they waited for their luggage.

Qiao stumbled to the side from the force of the taller girl and just blushed in response. 

“See you tomorrow, Qiao-jie,” Yiren waved as they headed off toward their van. 

Qiao stood on the curb and hailed a taxi. She was, in fact, thrilled to see her boyfriend, and planned to surprise him at the venue.

The NEXT boys were coming back together for a glorious, albeit brief, reunion. One by one they trickled into Beijing, except for Wenjun and Zhengting who arrived together from Chongqing the morning of rehearsals with enough time to take their things to the apartment before going to the venue. Chengcheng had arrived the night before and was making lunch with Quanzhe and Zeren when their eldest brothers arrived. When they got to the venue a while later to rehearse Xinchun was already waiting there. Justin arrived just as they were starting on stage, but Zeren and Quanzhe already had them practicing backstage while they waited for their rehearsal slot to open up. As usual, Zeren pushed them up until the moment they were politely asked to leave. He asked for them to be allowed to do it one more time, extra stressed about the debut of what he still considered to be his song. His song with Qiao. And somewhere in the back of his head he was wondering where she was. He'd gotten a text earlier when she landed, shortly before starting rehearsals. It wasn't that she was supposed to be there, but he had hoped a little that she would be, knowing how having her watch him gave him just a little more power. But by the time they did leave the stage she wasn't there. Quickly they packed up their things and got in the van to go home, all of them knowing that they weren't finished practicing for the night. 

In the very back seat of the small bus Zhengting looked at his phone. He had several missed calls from a Beijing number he didn't recognize, so he called it, curious. 

"Beijing hospital, emergency room," the voice that answered said. 

Zhengting's eyes widened, and the noise of the other boys laughing and joking faded into the background. He said his name and that he had missed calls. 

“Just a moment.” A shuffling of papers among the bustling of the emergency room followed. "You're listed as the emergency contact for Zhu Zhengqiao," the woman said.

"Yes. I'm her brother."

Wenjun looked at him, face blank but curious. For now he was the only one close enough to hear.

"Your sister is in surgery right now for injuries she sustained this afternoon in a car accident. Can you come to the hospital?"

Zhengting froze, processing the information very slowly. "I'm on my way." He hung up and walked slowly toward the front of the bus. "We need to go to the emergency room at Beijing Hospital," he said very quietly to the driver. 

"Is everyone okay?" The driver asked calmly. 

"Yes. We are fine. Get us there as quickly and safely as possible, please," Zhengting requested very politely. The driver nodded and signaled for an exit.

Zhengting slowly turned around to look at the other boys. Wenjun was looking at him across the bus, his face still blank, but concern clear in his eyes. The first row of seats behind the driver was empty on both sides. Then there were Quanzhe and Zeren, the new best friends, sitting to the left. Zhengting sort of stumbled into the seat across from them, facing Zeren. Xinchun, Chencheng and Justin were all in the next row, and their voices fell silent as they saw the whiteness of Zhengting's face, even paler than usual.  
"What's wrong, gege?" Xinchun asked. 

Zhengting looked solemnly at Zeren and swallowed. "Qiao is in the hospital. All I know right now is that she was in a car accident, and now she is in surgery. We are going there now," he explained slowly.

Everyone was silent, watching either Zhengting's face or Zeren's. Neither of them moved or spoke. Zeren had many questions, but Zhengting had clearly said all he knew, and there wouldn't be any answers. Several minutes passed without anyone uttering a sound. They were getting close to the hospital.

"Ren-ge," Zhengting started quietly. "I'm going to go in, but you can't."

Zeren knew that. Of course he knew that. But every part of his mind and several parts of his body were rebelling against the idea. He couldn’t ask unanswerable questions, and he couldn't go inside, and he couldn't do anything at all to help the most important person in his life. And that was all just a bit too much, so his whole body rejected it. His fists clenched. His legs prepared, coil-like, ready to run past Zhengting to see her.

"Zhengting is she going to be okay? Please let me see her," he pleaded, knowing it was all out of his and Zhengting’s control, knowing that the elder had made the declaration for his own good.

"Of course she'll be okay, gege," Quanzhe told him, patting his shoulder. 

They pulled up to the emergency room, and Zhengting stood. "I will call as soon as I have any news. You guys go home and practice, okay?" He shared a look with Wenjun, whose expression was sympathetic but also reassuring.

As soon as Zhengting's back was turned, Zeren stood to follow him, ignoring the directive, but Quanzhe and Xinchun both put their hand on his shoulders to bring him back down to his seat, and he was too in shock to fight back. The driver closed the door and pulled away. 

"Why won't he let me go in?" Zeren asked, pain choking him, knowing it was unfair to place the blame on Zhengting. 

Quanzhe reached out and pulled Zeren's head to his shoulder just in time to hide the older boy's tears. "The best thing you can do to protect her now is stay away. If you go in their you'll give yourself away, and then things will only be worse. Ting-ge will take care of everything, and she'll be fine. She'll be so happy to see you when she comes home." Quanzhe kept talking softly to sooth Zeren and stroked his back while he sobbed on his shoulder. The van was quiet.

It was less quiet inside the emergency room lobby. Zhengting walked quickly to the admissions desk and told them he was there for Zhu Zhengqiao. Luckily he was wearing a hat that day, and he'd put on his mask. The nurse asked for ID and he handed it to her, pulling his mask down for a second so she could see his face and then replacing it. She nodded and told him to follow her. She led him down a series of hallways to arrive at a small waiting area outside the surgery wing. It was late, and there was no one else there. 

"She's still in surgery now. Wait here, and they will give you more information." She left him and he sat alone in the quiet hallway.

It seemed like hours went by, but it was actually only about 40 minutes before the surgeon came out. 

"You're the family of Zhu Zhengqiao?" He asked, and Zhengting nodded. "Surgery to fix a compound fracture to her right ulna went well. She also has a couple of cracked ribs, and some cuts and scrapes. But she'll be okay," the surgeon assured her.

"How did this happen?" Zhengting wondered anxiously.

"The car she was in was hit directly on her side," the doctor explained.

Zhengting nodded. "When can I see her?" he asked.

"They'll move her to a recovery room in a few minutes, you can see her then, but she won't be awake for a couple of hours, maybe longer." Zhengting nodded again, and the man disappeared through the swinging doors.

Zhengting went to the closest nurses station and requested that she be placed in a private room. He thought about calling the guys to tell them what he'd learned, but decided to wait until he had his eyes on her so he could feel and sound more calm. 

The six other members of Yuehua's NEXT arrived home quieter than they ever had before. As they filed in they headed straight for the dance studio. 

"Don't bother guys," Zeren said, bringing up the rear. "Just go to bed." He looked utterly desolate. It was painful for them to see.

Wenjun put his arm over his old roommate's shoulder. "I haven't seen Qiao-jie in over a month, and I don't want to embarrass myself and you tomorrow when we debut her first single. Do you?" he asked.

"Yeah, Ren-ge. We've worked so hard. I bet she'll be back with us tomorrow, and we should give her our best stage. She deserves it," Quanzhe encouraged.

Zeren looked at them all doubtfully, even though he knew they were right. Still, he didn't move.

Chengcheng stepped in. He put his hand on the back of his older brother's head. "I know you want to do something right now. And you can do this. It's what she'd tell you to do." 

Zeren thought of how happy it would make her to watch them dance together and he nodded. 

"We'll all be together when Zhengting calls, okay?" Minghao added.

Zeren nodded again, and Wenjun pulled him down the hall to the studio. Perfecting the routine was just enough to distract him, and no one complained. 

Zeren's phone, which was connected to the speaker and played the music, rang about an hour later. Everyone stopped and ran for the phone. Zeren answered the video chat.   
Zhengting looked tired and washed out under the bright hospital lights, but he looked less worried than when he got off the bus, so they all felt a slight relief.

"How is she?" Zeren asked without any formalities. 

"She's okay. A few broken bones, cuts and bruises, but the surgeon said she'll be okay," he assured them.

"Can we see her?" Wenjun asked, crowding Zeren's shoulder.

"She's sleeping in the recovery room. I don't think she'd appreciate me showing you the dumb look on her face right now." Zhengting smiled.

"Don't say that, gege. She's beautiful," Zeren said defensively. Zhengting just laughed. 

"Everything is fine here. You guys get some rest, okay? We have a big day tomorrow and she will want us to do our best. Don't worry."

"Ting-ge?" Zeren asked before the leader could hang up. 

"Yeah, didi?"

"Can you call me if anything changes or if she wakes up. Doesn't matter what time it is. Please?" Zeren pleaded. 

"I will. Try to get some sleep," Zhengting urged. 

"Okay. Thanks. Bye." The call ended.

Zeren set the phone down and turned around. He wasn't looking for a hug, but he got a great big one from all his brothers.

"You guys heard the leader. You should go to bed. Rest well for tomorrow."

"You sure?" Minghao asked. Zeren nodded. Xinchun, Chengcheng and Minghao all filed out and over to their side of the apartment, arguing over who would get the shower first.

Zeren turned to face the mirrored wall and rubbed his hands over his face before bringing them down to his hips. He was surprised to see Wenjun and Quanzhe still standing there. 

"I'm still not sure about that one part," Wenjun told him.

Zeren smiled weakly at him. Wenjun had never worked this hard on choreography in his life, and he knew this was brotherhood and his love for Qiao, and not his newfound love of dance, but he appreciated it nonetheless. He and Quanzhe practiced with Wenjun for at least an hour more, until they were all too tired to go on but also too anxious to go to sleep. Zeren was ready to collapse on the studio floor, like he'd done many times with Qiao, and wait for news, but Wenjun suggested they go to the living room instead, so at least they'd be comfortable. They all half watched an anime until Quanzhe and Wenjun both fell asleep. Zeren was almost there, but he just couldn't allow himself to let go of consciousness. He looked at photos of Qiao, selfies they had taken together in happy moments that they couldn't share because they had to be secret. He waited for a call. 

Zhengting sat beside his twin, who was so much smaller than him. He was eight inches taller and twelve minutes older, and he called her little sister, but he always knew that she was the one looking out for him. She was the one who defended him when he was bullied as a kid. She was the one who defended him to their mom when he made the choice on his own to sign with Yuehua. She was always the one to lift him up when he was down, at least before Wenjun, and she was their greatest supporter. But she looked small and fragile in the hospital bed, and that was really why he wouldn't let them see her. He knew she would be okay, that her state was temporary, but he thought Zeren was lucky not to have to see her this way. This was hard. 

Zhengting took her left hand, the one that wasn't in a cast and held it to his cheek. "Meimei, we are debuting your song tomorrow. I'm so proud of you, and of Zeren. Everyone is working hard to bring you the best performance, so you have to get well, okay?" He held her hand tightly in both of his. "You're really lucky, you know? I mean, maybe not all the time," he laughed a little to himself, looking at the situation. "But that kid really loves you. You guys have something really special, and I'm so happy for you." 

Zhengting went quiet and lost himself in thought. He worried about how and when and what to tell their mom. It was no use calling now. It would only rob her of a night's sleep. There was a reason that Zhengting was her emergency contact, and it wasn't just that they were technically living in the same town. The twins had spent years watching their mother work herself to the bone just to keep the family afloat, and somewhere along the way they taught themselves to take things off her plate. Qiao took more of the burden than he did, cooking dinner, making sure the house was always clean and they were on top of their grades so mom didn't need to worry about those little things. Later they started to actively hide things so mom wouldn't be troubled by them, and that's how they got to the point where he signed his secret contract, and she was living alone in an apartment with boys. But there were some things too important not to tell. 

Zhengting lost himself in thought until Qiao squeezed his hand. It was light, but it was movement. He looked up at her face, and her eyes were slowly blinking open. He jumped to his feet to hover over her. She blinked and coughed. 

"Ting, what are you doing here?" she croaked from her dry throat.

"I'm here because you're in the hospital," he told her, brushing hair from her face. 

She tried to look down at herself, raised her hands, saw her cast. "What happened?" She couldn't remember.

"There was a car accident coming home from the airport. You broke some bones, but you're okay. How do you feel?"

"Sore," she croaked. "Can I have some water?" 

"Sure," he smiled. "I'll be right back," he told her and disappeared from view.

She turned her head to look around, but her neck was stiff and her muscles hurt. All of them. Zhengting hurried back into the room after talking to a nurse. "Do you need something?" he asked frantically. 

She shook her head but that hurt, too. She was just disoriented and lost, but she didn't quite know how to articulate that. "Where's Zeren?" she wondered. 

Zhengting's heart ached for her. "He's at home, waiting for you," he told her.

"Oh, right," she said, but her voice, still small and strained, betrayed her disappointment. Her slow thoughts caught up to that obvious answer. He couldn't be there. That must be hard on him, she thought. 

A nurse came in with warm water and set it on the bedside table. Qiao tried to sit up so she could drink, but it was hard to move. The nurse pushed a button on the bed that inclined her torso and handed her a cup of water. She asked some questions about how she felt and wrote some things on her chart and then excused herself. 

"Ren-ge wants you to call him if you're up for it," Zhengting said when the nurse left. 

"Where's my phone?" she wondered, patting around her like she would have in her own bed.

"Oh. I don't know. I haven't seen any of your things, actually," he admitted. He hadn't thought about it, and she was too tired to think about it now. "We can use my phone though." He got it out and dialed Zeren, then handed the phone over.

"Ting-ge?" Zeren answered frantically. He'd been half asleep, and the phone ringing startled him since he'd turned the ringer all the way up in order to not miss a call. The other boys with him stirred a little, but didn't quite wake up. 

"It's me," Qiao said, her voice slow and quiet, still a little hoarse.

Zeren sat up. "Baby, how are you feeling?"

She was already tired of the question. "I'm fine," she said sleepily.

"I'm sorry," Zeren said simply, but regretfully.

"It's okay, Ze. Don't worry about it."

"I'm worried about you," he said softly. 

"I'm okay. Really." She tried to make her voice brighter, but she was too tired to pull it off. "You should be sleeping. I want to see you tomorrow."

"I hope I can see you tomorrow, too," he said, but they meant different things. "I love you," he said.

"I love you, too," she replied. "I'm serious. Get some sleep, and I will, too."

"Okay," he agreed. "Goodnight." 

She hung up and handed the phone back to her brother. "You need to get some sleep, too," she urged. "Go home." 

"There's a bed over here I can sleep on. I'm not leaving until I know when I can take you home." He knew he'd have to leave tomorrow for the performance, but he hoped he'd know something by then.

"Can you turn off the lights?" She asked as she lowered her bed back down. He flipped them off and took the bed beside hers, covering himself up with the blanket the nurse had given him. It took only seconds for him to fall asleep. 

Qiao’s heart felt heavy with disappointment. Of course, she knew Zeren couldn’t be there. She knew they had probably had to physically restrain him from coming, and that ultimately he would not be there for her because it was her job on the line if they were exposed. So she didn’t blame him, but she missed him. She wanted him. She wished that it was Zeren’s face that she woke up to, as she had become so accustomed to do. For the last week she’d missed waking up to that face, and it was all she wanted to see now. Her body and her mind ached so much she felt she was coming apart at the seams. Painfully, she curled onto her side as she preferred to sleep. She let a few tears fall for her various kinds of hurt and tried to tell herself that if she could fall asleep it would be better when she woke up. 

She woke up several hours later, still sore, but feeling slightly less exhausted. With some difficulty she rolled onto her back. She could see Zhengting still sleeping a couple meters away. Slowly, she sat up and felt around for hospital slippers and shuffled to the bathroom. As she washed her hands she looked up to catch her reflection in the mirror. There were a few cuts and scratches on the right side of her face where the glass busted in on her, and she was suddenly aware of the aching above her right ear. A few fragmented memories came back to her: the truck coming toward her window, the sound of glass breaking. She shook her head and that hurt. Quickly she shut off the water and dried her hand and went back to the room.

Somewhere in the time she was in the bathroom Zhengting had woken up and a doctor and nurse had appeared. The doctor invited her to get back in bed so he could ask her some questions. Check her eyes. Was she dizzy when she got up? A little. How was her head? Aching. Yes, she had a minor concussion, nothing to be too worried about, it could be monitored at home, if there were people who could take care of her. Yes, there were people. How was her arm? She had had surgery for a compound fracture. It hurt, but not any worse than the rest of her. Yes, she would be sore for several days, but she should be fine with some pain medicine. Rest and no strenuous exercise were prescribed. Not much they can do about the ribs, but be careful. 

“When can she come home?” Zhengting asked when it seemed like the onslaught of questions was over. 

“There don’t seem to be any complications from the surgery, but we’ll draw some blood just to be sure there’s no infection. If that’s okay, she should be able to go home this afternoon,” the doctor smiled. 

“Thank you, doctor,” Zhengting smiled back, relieved. He wanted to get her out of this place, and he was glad she was alright, but honestly he wanted her to see them perform.

“You can go now, Ting,” she told him as the nurse got ready to draw her blood. “Tell them I’ll be fine and I’ll see them at home.”

“You’ll come tonight, won’t you?” Zhengting asked, already pleading. 

Qiao looked away. “I don’t want everyone to see me like this,” she said quietly. “I’m sore. I’m tired. I want to go home. Ow.” The nurse jabbed the needle into her vein and she closed her eyes. She was glad she hadn’t had time to anticipate it.

“Meimei,” Zhengting started, almost whining. “Tonight is your night, you know? You have three songs being performed tonight. Two debuts.”

“Two?” she stopped short. The nurse pulled the needle out and applied a bandage before leaving quietly. 

“Wang Yibo is doing your song tonight, too,” he told her. 

“It’s not my song,” she said in a tone mocking Yibo. 

“Whatever. You’re the freaking heart of Yuehua, right now. You’ll be the belle of the ball. You have to come,” he insisted. 

“Gege, look at me. I’m a wreck.”

“No one is going to care. And,” he paused, pulling out his ace. “It would mean the world to Zeren. You two did this together, and you should be there to see it come to fruition in person.”

It was low, but it was effective. She didn’t say anything to agree, but he could see in her face and her body that she had given in. The tension that had been her resistance melted away. 

“I’m going to have someone come here to fix you up and take you over when you get discharged. Don’t worry about a thing.” He was already pulling out his phone and texting furiously. “I gotta go, but I am going to see you TONIGHT. Get some rest.” He kissed her on the forehead and hurried out of the room, leaving her alone.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I like to think of this fan fiction as existing half an inch to the left and a foot above our actual universe. Some things remain true, some things come from the same direction, while others reflect a more perfect world, the way we wish things were. For example, in this work, we pretend that Yuehua Entertainment is a company that manages functional musical groups on occasion.

Zhengting managed to convince a hair and a makeup stylist to go to the hospital to get her ready for the event, since she was also a member of the Yuehua family. Very nicely they helped her wash her hair, where a few pieces of glass fell out. The makeup artist did her best to reduce the appearance of the cuts on her face, but overall by the time they were finished with her even she thought that she looked good enough that it wasn’t so bad to be seen. 

At the venue the guys went through the usual routine of rehearsal, hair/makeup/wardrobe and then photoshoot. For maybe the first time in his life, Zeren struggled to focus on dancing. It wasn’t hard for him to pull off his usual serious look, but even Xinchun and Justin looked subdued in their photos. Even though Zhengting had assured them that she was fine and she was coming, they wouldn’t feel sure until they could see her for themselves. 

Qiao was released late, and traffic was bad on a Saturday evening in Beijing, but Qiao made it just in time. NEXT was on stage first, and they were told she had arrived only seconds before going on stage. Zeren didn’t care. He wanted to run to wherever she was and hug her, but he controlled himself for her sake and for their performance. At least now he could feel real relief. She was where they were, so at least she was safe, and she would be watching. 

The lights went down on stage and they took their places. Just before the lights came back up, Zeren looked into the wings and saw Qiao. He recognized her by her smile. NEXT gave a flawless performance to a cheering crowd. After ‘Show you’ they performed ‘WYTB.' When it was over they rushed off stage to chants of their names. Qiao wasn’t where Zeren had seen her standing. Someone said she was waiting in their dressing room. Chengcheng had to stay behind to perform ‘Missed Texts’ and Zhengting had to wait to perform. He grabbed Zeren’s arm before he could run off. 

“What?” Zeren asked, eyes wide. 

“She’s got a couple broken ribs. Be gentle,” Zhengting told him with a wink. A sly smile pulled up the right side of his mouth. He ran to catch up with others and arrived last. 

“Damn, Qiao-jie, you look like hell,” he heard Justin say, making his heart skip a beat as he pushed through the other boys. 

“I’m glad you’re okay,” Wenjun smiled at her. 

“Thank guys.” 

Finally, Zeren made it to the front of the group. He was breathless. He stopped short, a meter away from her. The other boys took a step back and turned away, but he couldn’t have cared less if they watched or not. Qiao was smiling at him, so for all he noticed they might as well not have been there at all. He closed the gap between them and took her head in his hands. He couldn’t find words to say. He felt too relieved to verbalize it. 

“You were amazing,” she said, giving his chaotic thoughts something to hold on to. 

He laughed. “That would be the first thing you say.” He shook his head. 

“It’s true,” she said, but he stopped the sound. He kissed her, remembering to be gentle.

“I’m glad you made it,” he admitted. 

“I wouldn't miss it.”

He looked down and took her injured arm. “How are you? Does it hurt?”

“Everything hurts a little,” she admitted with a shrug, which hurt too. “But I’m fine. Don’t worry.”

“You should rest,” he said, wanting to push her toward a couch. 

“I want to go watch the performances,” she told him. 

He tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled. “Okay,” he said, but kissed her again. He released her and turned around to go out.

The others had stayed in the room to give them cover so they weren’t seen alone, but they were doing their best to completely ignore the couple. Together they went out to take audience seats on the upper balcony, above all the screaming fans. She felt bad for making them miss Chengcheng’s performance, but they were at least able to hear Zhengting while they made their way to their seats. Justin went to wait for his turn to perform. Many other artists, company execs and producers were up there as well. Du Hua saw them enter and signaled Qiao to come over to her where she was standing with Yu Ming. 

“How are you?” Du Hua yelled over the music. 

“I’m fine,” she yelled back and tried to smile. 

“Your song was a hit. It’s already selling huge on Netease,” Du Hua said, pointing to her phone. 

“Half a million since the boys took the stage,” Yu Ming told her. 

“REALLY?!” Qiao screamed and then winced when it hurt everything. 

“Really. And the night just started. Go and enjoy it,” Du Hua smiled. 

Qiao went back to her seat as fast as she could to tell Zeren. She used her hand to cover her mouth as she yelled the news to him, and snuck him a kiss on the cheek. With his whole body he resisted the urge to hug and kiss her, and instead turned to pass the news down the line. Qiao sat back in her seat to give her body a rest and enjoyed the rest of the performances as they rolled through the night. Zeren contented himself with hooking his foot around hers and sharing smiles with her throughout the night. 

When the concert ended the guys went out for a short press interview, primarily to take photos and answer a few questions. By then the sales had climbed over a million. 

“Zhu Zhengting, what do you attribute the quick success of the single to?” a reporter asked. 

“To my beautiful sister,” he smiled and then laughed his dorky laugh. “And Zeren, who worked really hard on the song and our choreography. To Yu Ming who helped us produce it along with all our Yuehua family. And of course to our faithful fans who always support us.”

“Zeren do you have anything to say?” the reporter asked, and Zhengting passed the microphone down to him. 

Zeren had a lot of things to say, but he couldn’t say most of them. He smiled bashfully. His face flushed. “I just want to say thank you to everyone who worked hard on the single and thank you to our fans who bought the song. I hope you like the performance. We will continue to show you the best.” He winked at the camera and passed the mic back. 

Afterward they all got into the minibus to head to another venue for the after party, just for the Yuehua artists, producers and staff, and a few reporters. In the vehicle Zeren felt like he could finally breathe. He held Qiao’s good hand fiercely, sitting as close to her as possible.

“We don’t have to go,” he told her. “We could just go home if you’re tired.”

“I’m not tired,” she smiled. She felt great. She still felt pain, but it wasn’t bothering her. 

“Don’t be a party pooper,” Zhengting said to him, leaning over the back of his seat. “It’s a big night!”

“Plus there’s always really good food,” Xinchun chimed in. 

“And I’m sooo hungry,” Qiao whined. 

“As long as you're fine,” he smiled. 

She shook a pill bottle at him. “I can take these after I eat, and then I’ll be great.” She was beaming, so he chose not to question her anymore, but just stared into her eyes and felt her happiness. “Hey Zhengting, what’s that thing up ahead of us?”

“What thing?” he asked and walked toward the front of the bus. 

Qiao pressed her lips to Zeren’s, and her happiness felt complete. Then, she didn’t care how many downloads the single had or who was going to be at that party, because she had her biggest fan next to her, and he would support her no matter what. 

“I don’t see anything, meimei,” Zhengting said, turning back around. Zeren lifted a hand to wave him away emphatically. The older boy blushed and sat in the closest seat, right on top of Justin.

Zeren hadn’t quite had his fill by the time they arrived at the venue for the party, but he told himself to be satisfied for now. She helped him wipe off any lipstick that was smudged and Zhengting graciously lent her his lipstick so she could fix herself up. When she gave it back he touched up his own.

“Oh, now it’s like I’ve kissed Zeren,” he said with an apologetic look at Wenjun, who laughed quietly. 

“Actually it’s more like I’ve kissed you,” Zeren said as he passed his leader by. 

“Lucky boy.” Qiao winked as she followed.

The eight of them entered together, and she wasn’t prepared for the flash of cameras outside the venue. Zeren had dutifully moved toward Quanzhe to take his usual post at second from the left. Qiao tried to escape by stepping away to the side, but Xinchun put an arm around her and pulled her in. Finally, they were able to enter the building, her under her brother’s protective arm. 

When they arrived in the main room Qiao looked longingly at the buffet table of food laid out for them. But before she could make a move in that direction she was swarmed by the Everglow girls. 

“Qiao-jie, what happened to you?” Yiren cried when she saw her. “We left you in one piece at the airport yesterday.”

“I got in an accident on the way home, but I’m okay. You guys were great tonight!” Qiao smiled. 

“We loved your songs tonight! Maybe next year we’ll get to perform one of yours,” Mia told her.

“I hope so,” Qiao said, eyeing the food out of the corner of her eye. 

Aisha followed her gaze and laughed. “We’ll let you go. Congratulations!” She hugged Qiao gently and they left.

Qiao turned and walked over toward the food, until Li Wenhan suddenly appeared in front of her, with Wang Yibo.

“Hey, Qiao,” Wenhan smiled. “You...well, I want to say you look great, but-”

“You look like you got hit by a train,” Yibo interjected. 

Qiao rolled her eyes at him. “It was a truck, but thanks.”

Only Zeren had even noticed that Qiao got separated from them as the boys moved around the room like a single unit, but of course he couldn’t do anything to stop it. When he saw the conversation between his girl and the boys from UNIQ he stopped in his tracks and tapped Wenjun and Zhengting on the shoulders. 

“If you don’t go over there and rescue her, one of two things is going to happen,” he said when they looked at him curiously. “Either I’m going to make a scene or she is.”

They oldest boys looked over in the direction he pointed, and when they saw her talking to Yibo they hurried over to take her away. 

“How’s your single doing tonight?” Qiao asked, crossing her arms. 

“It’s going great. 100,000 downloads already.” He smiled smugly. 

“Hm. Maybe you should’ve left it the way it was,” she smirked. 

“Meimie, remember you need to eat something so you can take your medicine,” Zhengting said, pushing her gently away from the UNIQ boys, but not before she and Yibo exchanged death glares. 

“What is with you two?” Wenjun laughed as he helped Qiao fill her plate with food. Unlike everyone else at the event she could pretty much eat as much as she wanted. 

“I don’t know...he just really gets under my skin. He said I looked like I was hit by a train,” she pouted. 

“Well, you do,” Zhengting agreed, and she smacked him with her good hand. 

“Are you my brother or his?” she growled. 

“Sorry. Sorry. Please get your food and eat before someone gets hurt,” he laughed. 

“I am not violent,” she said, sounding just like her brother. 

They sat down with the other guys from NEXT and dug into their food. Qiao ate with abandon, not caring who saw her. After several minutes, Minghao told Chengcheng something in his ear while grinning and glancing at Qiao, and whatever it was made Chengcheng laugh loudly. None of it escaped her notice. She narrowed her eyes at them while she swallowed a dumpling. 

“What’s so damn funny, Minghao,” she asked when her mouth was clear. 

He glanced at Zeren on his other side and then back at Qiao. He leaned forward. “I was just telling Cheng-ge how you’ve been playing footsie with me under the table for the last five minutes,” Minghao laughed. 

Zeren’s eyes widened, chicken wing hanging out of his mouth. Qiao’s eyes opened wide, too, before she covered her face with her casted arm. She looked under the table and sure enough, there was Justin’s foot, invading Zeren’s space and blocking her access to him. She had thought Zeren was keeping a shockingly good poker face

“Minghao,” she growled just loud enough for him to hear. “If I were not injured right now, you would be a dead man.” She stared him straight in the eyes. “Maybe not here, at this party, but you’d be sleeping with one eye open.”

Minghao’s eyes were glued to her, but everyone else was laughing hysterically. 

After eating she felt immensely better, and after taking her pills she felt freaking great. She still wasn’t ready for what was coming later in the night though. First, Du Hua made a speech about all the great and successful things the Yuehua family had done in the last twelve months. She closed by announcing that as of the time she had come out on stage, ‘Show you’ sales had passed 2 million in only a handful of hours. She congratulated NEXT, Zeren, Qiao and Yu Ming. Qiao hoped she was covered by Zhengting when he hugged her and that no one saw her tears of joy before she wiped them away. She allowed herself a professional smile and look with Zeren, who was glowing. 

After the speech Du Hua came over to congratulate her again, and to tell her that there was a magazine that wanted to interview her. 

“Me?” Qiao asked incredulously, pointing a finger at her own cut up face. 

“You,” Du Hua confirmed. “Does this week work for you?”

“Uh, yeah, sure, this week,” Qiao responded, discombobulated by the combination of the news, the pills, and the mere idea that anyone would want to interview her. 

“I’ll set it up and give you a call, okay?” 

Qiao wanted to say she didn’t have a phone but she could call one of the guys and they’d let her know, but she was slow and the boss had already walked away. She would have been babbling anyway. There was some more mingling that happened afterward. Some people certainly talked to her, and many asked to sign her cast, but the exhaustion, the shock and the painkillers were all getting to her, and it seemed to pass her by in a blur. Zhengting noticed her fading and suggested they go home as the night rolled on toward midnight. 

When they got back to the apartment she found an assistant had retrieved her things from the impound where the totaled car that picked her up from the airport had been taken. Her phone was smashed and useless, but someone had provided a new one, still in the box. She couldn’t be bothered to care about it at the moment and left it on the kitchen table. Zeren guided her down the hall toward their bedroom. 

“Can you help me wash my face?” she asked helplessly, her eyes feeling heavy. Zeren tried to contain his laughter at her altered state. She was far goofier than when she was drunk, and it had become apparent that she should probably take a smaller dose of her pain medicine, but she was safe at home, and it was all amusing for the moment. 

“Of course,” he smiled. He took her to the bathroom and opened a drawer to pull out makeup removing wipes, used far more by the boys of that bathroom than by her. She sat herself on the toilet lid and let him wipe her face gently as he crouched in front of her. 

“I’m really proud of you, Qiao,” he told her as he wiped her eyes. 

“You are?” The pitch of her voice way higher than usual, as if surprised.

“Mhm.”

She smiled a goofy smile. “I’m really proud of you, too.” She opened her eyes when he was done. 

“We made a great thing,” he smiled back. 

Her face turned serious for a moment. “We could make another great thing.” She winked and reached for him. Zeren fell backward into a mess of laughter at her suggestive response. He laughed as hard as he ever had for half a minute until she caught his infectious laughter and winced at the pain in her ribs, letting out a pitiful “ooooow!” 

He rolled back up to his feet and looked at her, worried. “Are you okay?” he asked frantically. 

“Fine. I just have to remember not to laugh too much,” she grimaced. The pain was just a bit sobering. “Give me a minute?” she asked, and he left a little reluctantly. She used the bathroom and brushed her teeth and reemerged to find Zhengting standing outside the door. She recoiled from the shock.

“You have a lot of medicines you need to take,” he told her. He had a folder full of discharge instructions and a bag of many pill bottles. She made a face. 

“I got it,” Zeren said, taking them from the big brother. “I’ll make sure she takes them.” He took Qiao’s hand and led her to the bedroom, leaving Zhengting smiling at the care the younger man was giving her. 

While she changed into her pajamas Zeren read over the instructions carefully, making sure not to miss any details and laying out the pills she needed to take, antibiotics and anti-inflammatories mostly. When he was finished he gave her a glass of water, and she took what he’d given her while he brushed out her hair, something that had become a soothing night time ritual for both of them. It was intimate in the most mundane kind of way, and he’d missed it while she was gone, and so had she. Finally they were able to lay down together in the darkness with her cuddled into his side, and he felt almost at peace. 

“I know you’re just going to say that you’re fine, but please don’t hesitate to tell me if I hurt you,” he said quietly in her ear. 

“I won’t,” she promised before she closed her eyes and instantly fell asleep.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes as I’m writing this fanfic I feel like I get away from the idols themselves quite a bit. I try not to, but I know I focus on Qiao a lot, and I used to feel bad about it, but my Best Friend said we stan Qiao. I like her a lot and I believe in her career as much as Zeren does, so I hope you like her too and if not I hope you’ll indulge me a bit with this chap.

"How are you?" Zeren asked when they woke up late the next morning. Qiao groaned pitifully in response. "Cmon, I'll make you breakfast so you can take some medicine," said, coaxing her tired body out of bed. He helped her down to the living room to rest on the couch. After bringing her coffee, he began to assemble pancake batter from the memory of all the times he’d watched her.

Quanzhe came excitedly into the living room while she was resting her eyes. She looked up at him giving her a hamstery grin, and he shoved his phone in front of her face. She saw a picture of her from the night before and groaned at him.

"I'll read it to you," he said, and she covered her face. "Thank you, Qiao-jie," he nudged her gently. "That's you. That's the title. It says, 'thank you sister Qiao for bringing our boys back with a total jam. 'Show You' is the best song we've heard from NEXT as a collective...maybe ever. And we have fairy Zhengting’s sister to thank for that. Her collab with Zeren combined with his excellent choreography gave us an explosive performance last night at the Yuehua family concert that left us all shook. The single has already hit 3 million downloads as of this post. And on top of all that she got in a serious accident on her way back from producing a song with Everglow that left her in the hospital and still managed to show up to last night's event looking fierce. Zhu Zhengqiao is our hero.' Then it goes on to talk about how hot the rest of us were, but who cares about that?"

Zeren came from the kitchen with a plate of pancakes and held it in front of her face. "See? I told you when they heard your music that they were going to love you," he reminded her and kissed the top of her head. 

She didn't care though, cause he had just brought her pancakes, and her love for him was insurmountable. She smiled at the plate in front of her. "I love you." She tilted her head back and puckered her lips for a kiss, which he gave. "Bring Quanzhe some pancakes for being the bringer of good news," she smiled. Zeren laughed and disappeared into the kitchen again. She reached out and pinched Quanzhe's cheek before she started eating.

As the day went on the family gathered and said goodbye one by one, just as they came. Wenjun and Zhengting had to go back to filming, and the eldest brother tried not to show how guilty yet relieved he felt that Zeren would be the one to take care of her. By the end of the day it was the three of them again, and to Zeren it was a relief. It meant Qiao could get the rest she needed without worrying about anyone else, and it meant he could love her with no guard up, because even if everyone thought he was excessive in his affections, he was usually holding himself back, and when he wasn't so worried about who was around he could just treat her in the way that felt most natural.

Still, Qiao could tell there was a lot in his heart that he couldn't or didn't know how to say. He was saying it with pancakes and reminding her of her medicine, but there were still other things he couldn't say by taking care of her. Late at night, when they were both supposed to be sleeping, he slipped away into the dance studio. He wasn't doing it to be alone and unobserved, like she did, but just because he couldn’t sleep and didn't know what else to do. Qiao gave him a little time, but she couldn't sleep either and laying down somehow made her pain worse, so eventually she got out of bed too and wandered down the hall to see what he was up to. She stood in the doorway where he couldn't quite see her and watched him dance. She watched for a full song and then another one until he turned and noticed her in the doorway. He stopped, hands on his hips, breathing heavily, and faced her.

"Are you okay?" he asked, concerned. 

She shook her head and walked forward to meet him.

"Don't lie," he said, reaching for her hand. "Are you in pain? Or did I wake you up?"

She shook her head again. "I couldn't sleep. I'm not in pain exactly, it's just that everything is uncomfortable. And I wanted to watch you dance."

He almost asked her to join him but he remembered specifically that she wasn't supposed to do any exercise. And she was disappointed too, because she would've liked to dance with him but the dull aches in her muscles wouldn't let her. And she was serious when she said she came to watch him.

"Can I just watch?" she asked quietly, and he nodded. She sat in the corner against the wall and watched him dance to BTS's 'Intro: Boy Meets Evil'. She interpreted more than he could have thought from his movements. He couldn’t say how painful it was to watch her hurting, or how he wished he could take it all for her. It was hard to articulate with words that he would do anything to help her with her dream and protect her career, but that not being allowed to go to see her in the hospital had pushed him to the limit. It was too much. That was absolutely as far as he could have gone, and if her condition had been any worse, nothing and no one would have been able to hold him back. It was hard not to have anyone or anywhere to put all the pent up emotional energy that his anxiety for her had created. It was too deep. It had too much volume, and the way it filled him up kept him from sleeping, so there he was dancing.

When Zeren looked at her, she looked serene. It wasn’t exactly happy, but it seemed to diffuse his emotion. Somehow, she could take it all, like a river running into an ocean. Suddenly, he didn't want to dance anymore. He wanted to chat with her for hours, to be able to say all the things that were on his heart, because if anyone could understand him, he knew it was her. He sat beside her and asked her what she was thinking.

"I just like that when I watch you dance, just for yourself and not for performance, I can know what you're thinking. I don't know if anyone else can, but I feel like I do. And that's why I wrote the song 'Show You.'" Qiao told him. He smiled. "You know, it's great that there are millions of people who bought the song and they're enjoying it, but when I hear it, when I saw you guys perform last night, all that song will ever mean to me is understanding you, feeling you, and being completely overwhelmed by your presence, like I was the first time I kissed you. I didn't plan on it. I didn't think of it. It was just what was supposed to happen, because it's you."

Zeren smiled at the memory of it before his face cell. "I feel so guilty," he admitted. 

She looked at him strangely. "For what?" she wondered, although she had already guessed. 

"For not being at the hospital to see you. For choosing our careers over being by your side. For letting the fans dictate how I treat you. It’s wrong.” His eyes were intense as they looked into hers. “I was wrong." 

She shook her head. "It's okay, Ze. You did the right thing." She rubbed his head with her good hand. "This whole thing sounded a lot worse than it is. It’s a few broken bones. A few cuts and scrapes. It’s not even my writing hand! But I'm sorry for worrying you." She touched her forehead to his. "I’m not going to let you lose sight of your dreams for me. I would make any sacrifice to make sure your dreams come true, and you'd do the same for me. And honestly, the fact that we have to hide ourselves up here isn't a horrible sacrifice. You give me more love here than I've ever received, and if we have to be apart in public, I can live with it, because I know where I stand in your heart."

He was straining the limits of his self-control. It was like a muscle and he was maxing out his physical limits of not being able to touch her and hold her and be with her in every way he wanted to. It had been forty-eight hours of holding back his every impulse that drove him toward her, and it was un-fucking-bareable. He kissed her as gently as he could, but it wasn’t enough for her either. She leaned into him, unhappy when he wasn’t touching her. She pushed him over until he was on his back, holding herself up with her good arm. He gently touched her hip. 

“Qiao, be careful,” he urged, pulling away from her kiss to say it. 

“Zeren, I’m not going to break. Do you know how much force it took to break me this much? You aren’t going to break me if you touch me.”

“No strenuous exercise,” he reminded her. 

“I’m just asking you to kiss me,” she begged. 

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he said softly. 

“I already hurt everywhere. You won’t make it worse by kissing me. I promise.”

He smiled and raised his hand to her cheek. “I knew you were lying about being in pain.”

“Zeren-gege, please. Please kiss me,” she whined and pouted. 

“Your aegyo is not very good. You should work on that,” he teased. She let out a grunt of frustration and moved to get off of him, but he put a gentle hand on her leg to keep her there. “I’m kidding.” He took her face in his hands very gently and kissed her. 

“Are you ready to go back to bed?” Zeren asked when he was afraid of wanting too much more. 

She wrinkled her nose. “Honestly, no. Anywhere but bed. Laying down is just so uncomfortable,” she complained, but sat up anyway. 

“Oh. I just remembered. I have some cream I use when I get too sore. Or actually, that I let the other guys use when they complain too much. Do you want to try it?” he offered. 

“Are you trying to tell me I’m complaining too much?” 

“Absolutely not. I’m actually worried you aren’t letting me know how bad it is.” He sighed and brushed her hair behind her ear. “You know, you have to be so tough with me. You’re my baby.”

“I’m not a baby,” she pouted just to make him laugh, and he did. “I’m tougher than I look.”

“I know.” He grinned and got to his feet so he could help her up. He walked to the bathroom and rummaged around in a drawer for the cream. He turned to her triumphantly when he found it. 

“Thanks,” she smiled and reached out to take it from him. 

He pulled it away. “I’ll do it for you.”

“I can do it,” she insisted, reaching out again. “You can go wait in the room.”

Zeren frowned. “What if I want the excuse to touch your skin?”

Qiao breathed deeply, and it made her ribs ache. She searched for a good excuse not to let him, but she couldn’t think of anything to say that would make him relent. The truth was, she didn’t want him to see how bad it was and to worry, but saying so would only make him more insistent. She sighed and nodded. 

“Where do you want it?” he asked, popping open the cap. 

Everywhere, she thought. “On my ribs?” That was the most uncomfortable place. He smiled and motioned for her to lift her shirt. “Just...don’t freak out. It looks worse than it is,” she prefaced. He gave her a weird look, and she removed her shirt. 

Zeren’s mouth fell open slightly at the sight of her black and purple side. “No wonder you’re in pain. How can you stand it?” She shrugged. She didn’t want to complain and make him worry or to be annoying. In truth, she was trying not to let herself be babied because she knew she’d like it too much, and she didn’t want to take advantage of Zeren’s concern and care for her. He squirted out a dollop of the cream into his hand and gently spread it across her side. Her skin began to cool and tingle. She wasn’t sure if it felt good, but it didn’t hurt and that was a relief. 

“Anywhere else?” he asked, looking over the rest of her body. There weren’t too many other visual signs of her pain, but he knew it was there.

“Do you want to rub it all over my body?” she asked, laughing a little. 

Zeren looked her dead in the eyes. “You know that I do.” His expression was so serious she had to laugh more loudly. 

“On my neck and my shoulders would be great,” she admitted. 

He smiled as he squeezed out more cream and massaged it into her skin. He tried not to enjoy it too much. Afterward he took her to the couch and gave her lots of pillows and blankets to be more comfortable and watched TV with her until they both fell asleep. 

The next morning Qiao got a call from Du Mama. She’d forgotten that she had agreed to do an interview for a magazine. They wanted to do it the following day. Qiao had already agreed, so she didn’t think she could back out, and she was starting to feel less sore, so maybe she would be okay. 

“What magazine?” she asked. 

“ _Elle_.”

Qiao choked on her own spit. “ _Elle? Elle magazine_ wants to do an interview with me?” She didn’t think she was fashionable enough for Elle. 

“Yes. Are you up for it?” the boss asked impatiently. 

Qiao swallowed. “Sure.”

“Great. I’ll send a car to pick you up at eight-thirty. Don’t be late.” Du Hua hung up. 

“What’s going on?” Zeren asked when he walked into the room carrying a bowl of noodles and a handful of pills and saw her staring into space with a worried expression. 

Qiao moved from the couch where she had been ensconced since the previous night down to the floor so she could eat. Surely she would feel better if she ate. “I guess I’m doing an interview with _Elle_ tomorrow,” she said before digging into her noodles. 

“Wow. That’s huge. And great. Are they doing a whole photoshoot and everything?” he wondered casually. 

Qiao stopped with a mouthful of noodles. She chewed quickly and swallowed. “A photoshoot? No. She didn’t say anything about that. They wouldn’t do that, would they?”

Zeren shrugged. “They might.”

“But…But I’m not a model.”

“You are very pretty though,” Zeren smiled at her. 

“But my face is all jacked up! No. No. They definitely aren’t.” She shook her head, hoping she was right. 

“Eat,” Zeren ordered. She picked up her chopsticks with less enthusiasm and forced herself to eat. 

“What do you think they’ll ask me about?” she wondered after she took the pills he’d put out for her. 

“They’ll probably just ask you about the song, your other work, what it’s like to work with us. That kind of thing.”

“What will I do if they ask me about working with you?” She had never been interviewed before. 

“Just be honest, but not specific. If they ask you about any specific members just be aloof about it. Like, ‘Oh, they’re all great.’ Nothing special.” He could see the real fear on her face and he felt bad for her. She didn’t like the attention, and he was surprised she’d agreed to do it at all. He walked over to her and helped her back onto the couch. He sat with her against his chest. “Don’t worry too much,” he tried to sooth her. “Just take it as it comes, and be your sweet self, and everything will be fine.” 

She nodded and sank into his chest, and they both fell into a nap. 

The next morning she had Zeren help her get ready. He made her breakfast and made sure she took the right medicine and sorted out medicine for her to take with her since Du Hua hadn’t said how long she would be there. 

“I feel bad letting you take care of me like this,” she admitted after finishing off a glass of water. 

“I like it,” he smiled. 

“A little too much. You think I can’t take care of myself,” she grumbled. 

“You could, if you put all your mind on it, but you don’t worry enough about yourself, and you’re a little spacey. On the other hand, all I’m doing is worrying about you anyway, so it’s no problem for me.”

She frowned. “I don’t want you to worry about me all the time.”

“It’s not for you to control,” he said simply. He looked at the clock on the microwave. “You’d better go down.” She gave him a nervous look. “Don’t worry. You’ll be great.”

“Maybe I should take one of the good pills,” she grinned. 

“We don’t want you to be that relaxed,” he laughed and kissed her forehead. 

“Alright, alright. I’m leaving.” She grabbed her purse and left him alone to his worries. 

When she arrived her fears were realized as she was led down the hall to a room set up for a photoshoot. The writer who was going to interview her and the photographer met her there. Qiao introduced herself nervously. 

“Are we doing a photoshoot?” she asked anxiously. 

“They didn’t tell you?” the writer, Chen Xiao, asked.

Qiao shook her head. “They were probably afraid I’d say no,” she laughed a little. 

“Why?”

“I’ve never modeled before,” she admitted. “I’m not really an in-front-of-camera person. Plus, well, I was in a car accident a few days ago, and my face is kind of all messed up.” She gestured to her face as if that wasn’t obvious. 

“Actually, that’s why I pressed for it so quickly. I saw you at the concert the other night and I thought you looked so badass. Someone told me about your accident and I was amazed that you showed up and you totally owned the night,” Chen Xiao told her. “I thought, that’s the face for a cover.”

“Seriously?” Qiao asked, tucking her hair behind her ear. “The cover?” Chen Xiao nodded.

“She’s right, you look cool. I promise, we’ll make you look awesome,” the photographer assured her. 

“Even with this?” Qiao lifted up her casted arm. 

“We’ve got some ideas.”

She was taken to hair and make-up. 

“Can I ask you a question?” Qiao asked Chen Xiao, who laughed at the role reversal and agreed. “Why did you want to interview me?”

“You know you have the number one song in China right now?” the writer asked sincerely. Qiao nodded. “Do you know you’re the only woman to ever produce a number one song in China?” Qiao did not know that. “I think that’s pretty impressive for anyone, and you’re only twenty-four years old.”

Qiao blushed. “Yuehua has given me a lot of opportunities.”

“How did you come to work for Yuehua?” Chen Xiao segwayed easily into the interview. 

“After I graduated college I started working for them in Seoul as a studio musician,” Qiao told her while the hairstylist continued to work around her. 

“How did you start writing songs for NEXT?” 

“I sold a couple of songs to Yuehua last year for UNIQ. After that, Du Hua thought I might be able to work with NEXT, and I just jumped at the chance to work with my brother.”

“You just presented your songs to them? That’s very bold.” Chen Xiao sounded truly impressed, and Qiao couldn’t stand it. 

“I didn’t, actually. I was just messing around in the studio one day on a break and Li Wenhan heard my song and he asked them to listen to it. They liked it, so they included it in the album.”

“Did you enjoy working with UNIQ?” Chen Xiao asked as the hairstylist finished and the makeup artist moved in.

Qiao tried not to show any emotion with her face. “I didn’t really work with them very much. I just wrote the song and recorded the keyboard piece. But they are a talented group of guys.”

“So it was different from working with NEXT?”

“Definitely.”

“How so?” Chen Xiao pressed. 

Qiao reminded herself of what Zeren had said and thought about an honest answer that wasn’t too specific. “I’ve definitely worked a lot more closely with NEXT. We have a good relationship, not just with Zhengting, but I’ve become friends with all of them. All the songs we’ve written so far were collaborations, so that’s been very different.”

“Your single ‘Show you’ was written with Ding Zeren. What was that like?” Qiao hoped she wasn’t blushing, or at least that the makeup artist was giving her some cover. She took advantage of the fact that she was applying lipstick to gather her thoughts. 

“Zeren was a great writing partner. He wrote the rap line and had a great sense of the feeling of the music. He’s a very talented dancer, so he really connected with the song.” She hoped she sounded detached enough and breathed a sigh of relief when Chen Xiao didn’t linger on the topic. 

“How long have you been writing songs?”

“Oh, since I was a teenager, I guess. I was always interested in music.”

“What inspires you?”

Qiao thought. “A lot of different things. I’m a romantic, so obviously there’s a lot of love that needs to be expressed. But there are a lot of different kinds of love and a lot of different emotions that are connected to it, so it could be anything. I worked with several of the guys on a song about love for their mothers that I’m very excited about.” Qiao smiled at the makeup artist as she backed away.Then she looked at herself in the mirror. The makeup was actually quite simple. It seemed they really weren’t going to try to hide her disfigurements at all. If anything, they had found a way to accentuate them. Qiao sighed

“Let’s take a break there so you can go get dressed.” Chen Xiao smiled and allowed her to be led away. 

They dressed her in an outfit she was sure was very fashionable, but she honestly had no idea. Then they led her back out to the shooting area. 

“I seriously have no idea what I’m doing,” she admitted, laughing awkwardly to the photographer. 

“I can tell you’re really nervous,” he agreed. 

“Who would normally help you if you were nervous?” Chen Xiao asked from the side. 

Zeren, she thought. “Zhengting,” she replied. 

“And what would Zhengting say if he were here right now?” 

Qiao laughed. “He would tell me that I’m a successful songwriter, and I’m being ridiculous.”

“Does that help?” she wondered. 

“Not really. Zhengting has always enjoyed being seen more than me. But then he’d say I’m at least as good looking as him.”

“Maybe you should give him a call,” Chen Xiao suggested. 

“He’s probably on set now, but we can try,” she said hesitantly. Someone retrieved her phone and gave it to her. She started a video call and was surprised when he picked up. 

“Hey, meimei,” he answered happily. 

“Hey, gege. Are you busy right now?” 

“No. Wenjun and I are just taking a break right now. What’s up? Are you wearing makeup?” Ting laughed.

“Yeah,” she laughed back. “I’m doing a photoshoot for Elle magazine right now,” she explained. 

“You? Why?” Zhengting asked. Wenjun appeared on screen with him. 

Qiao laughed harder. “I’m still not totally sure. They suggested I call you to make me feel less nervous.”

“Am I helping?”

“Not in the slightest. Do you have any modelling advice for me?”

Zhengting thought for a moment. “It’s just not going to work for you if you’re trying to be serious,” he told her. 

“I’m serious,” she argued. 

“But it won’t make you seem not nervous. Try to have fun. It will come more naturally.” Qiao looked at the photographer, who nodded reassuringly.

“Okay. Thanks. I’ll give it a try,” she agreed. “Everything okay over there?”

“Everything’s great. We’ll talk later. Bye bye!” Zhengting and Wenjun waved before hanging up. 

The photographer had someone put on some music to help her loosen up and got some good photos with a good deal of direction. Later, he was even able to coach her into taking some more serious shots. 

“Wow,” she marveled as they looked at the results together. “You’re a really great photographer,” she complimented, giving him all the credit. She even agreed that she actually looked cool with her messed up face. After a wardrobe change and some more photos it was finally back to the interview. 

“How did you feel today when you learned you were the first woman to ever produce a chart topping song in China?” Chen Xiao asked as she sat across from the young woman. 

“Of course I was excited, but honestly, I think it’s a little sad,” Qiao said thoughtfully. “I know so many talented female musicians and composers, and it’s a shame they aren’t given more opportunities to produce their own work. I feel very lucky.”

“Do you think there will be more opportunities for women like yourself in the future?”

“I hope so. I hope any success I have will go toward moving the industry forward for women. I hope artists will be more empowered to write and produce their own music. I hope women and young people will have more of a chance to make their artistic visions seen and heard.”

“Why don’t you record and perform your songs yourself? Were you ever interested in being an idol, like your brother?” Chen Xiao wondered.

“I think people are creative in different ways. I suppose I need to express myself, but I don’t necessarily want everyone, or anyone, to see me do it. I’m more shy that way, in a way Zhengting never has been. We’re twins but we are very different in a lot of ways. Zhengting shines and I just try to put more light on him. I don’t want it on myself. I could have never gone through all the work he went through as a trainee and now as an idol. It’s too big a spotlight for me. So, I enjoy writing and playing music, but I can only sing and dance for my closest friends.” She was only now getting comfortable doing so with Zeren. 

Chen Xiao smiled. “So there’s no solo album in your future?”

“It’s certainly not in my plans. I just want to keep writing my best songs and for them to be performed by the best artists. We all have our roles to play.”

“What advice would you give to young women who are interested in entering the music industry?”

Qiao let herself think for a minute, not used to or comfortable with giving advice. “I guess, I would say, have faith in what it is you want to create. Believe in your intention and don’t let others try to take you in a different direction. That’s hard for me--to stay focused--but it’s important to know what you want. There’s room for women in this industry as more than idols. And I’m not trying to put that down, because it’s harder than you can imagine, but there’s room for women as musicians, writers, producers and executives. Just look at Du Hua. You have to choose what you want your role to be and go for it. Surround yourself with people who will help you stay true to yourself, who keep you focused and who encourage you. Accept that it’s a struggle and keep working hard. We still say, the harder you work the luckier you are. Good things will come.”

Chen Xiao smiled. “Okay, now for some less serious questions. How would you describe your style and where does your fashion inspiration come from?”

Qiao covered her face and laughed. “I don’t feel like I have any style at all. I’m a homebody, so when it comes to clothes, I think about being comfortable, not about people looking at me. Before I started working with NEXT I honestly didn’t think much about what I wore going out. Now I have to think about it a bit more, because people take my picture and things and I shouldn’t be wearing, like, my most comfortable sweats. If I really want to look stylish I usually let someone else choose for me.”

“Who helps you the most with your style?”

Zeren, she thought again. “Honestly they all have way better fashion sense than I do. They all have a strong sense of their own style as well as what looks cool. For clothes it’s usually Zhengting, Chengcheng or Zeren. For makeup, I usually get Quanzhe to help me if I’m going out somewhere and I want to look good.”

Chen Xiao raised an eyebrow. “You’ve gotten close with all the guys then?”

“Yeah, I wanted to spend quality time with them when we first started working together. I’ve been a big fan of theirs since they started on Idol Producer, and so when I got the opportunity to write for them I didn’t just do it as a musician but as a fan. I wanted to understand their voices and their feelings. So we’ve gotten close, and we’ve become a little family. They’ve accepted me as the older sister of their band of brothers. They’re very kind and supportive boys.”

“They are all usually working on different projects. What’s it like when all of you are together?”

“Chaos. Imagine having seven brothers. It’s just utter madness most of the time.”

“Who are you closest with besides your brother?”

“Wenjun,” she said quickly to hide the fact that that wasn’t the true answer anymore. “We met in college, so I’ve actually known him longer than anyone else has.” 

“Who is the best to work with from the group?”

Zeren. 

“Oh. They’re all really great. I think the only one I haven’t written anything with is Justin because he’s so busy all the time. But really they’re all very talented and easy to work with.” 

She hoped that was vague enough and she was relieved when Chen Xiao told her that was all she had. She breathed easy, thinking she’d only said Zeren’s name once or twice. On the way home she had the driver stop and get food so she could eat and take medicine and not lie to Zeren about it. 

“How was it?” he asked when she walked in. 

She fell into his side where he had his arm resting on the back of the couch, unwittingly leaving a space open for her. “It was so hard. I don’t know how you guys do stuff like that all the time. Mostly though, it was hard not to talk about you,” she admitted. 

“Why’s that?” he asked, gratified and unable to hide his smile. 

“She kept asking things like, who makes you feel less nervous, or who are you closest to, or who’s the best to work with. And it was hard because all of those things are you,” she sighed. 

“What did you say?” he wondered, leaning his head on hers. 

“Zhengting, or Wenjun, or ‘everyone is great!’ I feel like I lied a lot,” she laughed. “I hate that I couldn’t talk about how great you were and how much you did for the song. I’m sorry. I feel like I didn’t give you enough credit.”

“I know the feeling, but we should stop apologizing for the things we have to do,” he told her. 

She nodded, even though she knew she would forget. “Ugh. And then the photoshoot. It was just too much.”

Zeren kissed her hair. “I’m sure you looked beautiful. How do you feel?”

“I’m fine. Not that sore anymore. It’s mostly just my ribs now. Pretty soon we’ll be able to…”

“Hey, no rush. You need to heal.”

Qiao pouted. “I’m in a rush.”

Zeren laughed. “I’m not going to risk hurting you,” he insisted. “Do you want the cream on your ribs?”

She nodded, thinking happily of him touching her. “And then a nap?”

He grinned and then took her to their room. “I moved the beds together so we could have more space.”

“You want space?” she asked, skeptically. Usually he liked to be glued to her, and it wasn’t hard to do on the small twin bed. 

“None whatsoever. I just thought it might be a little more comfortable for you. At least until you’re feeling better.”

“I can’t believe we didn’t think of this sooner,” she said as she climbed onto one of the beds and spread herself out.

Zeren crawled up next to her and began to lift up her shirt. Her bruise was starting to turn more brown and yellow than purple. 

“I thought you said you didn’t want to do anything,” Qiao smiled slyly. 

“I’m putting medicine on you. Geez, you’re so horny,” he laughed. “And I didn’t say I didn’t _want_ to do anything.” 

He spread the cream on her side and then pulled her shirt back down before he disappeared to the bathroom to wash his hands. Qiao laid staring at the wall, daydreaming about platinum records on the wall and being the first woman to produce a number one single. Zeren came back and climbed in bed beside her. He covered them both with a blanket and wrapped his arms around her, spooning. 

“I thought you were going to give me some space,” she said quietly. 

“Oh. I forgot,” he said with a touch of sadness. He tried to pull away, but she held him tight, even when it hurt a little. 

“I don’t want space,” she told him. 

He relaxed and held her gently. “I felt so nervous all day,” he confessed. “I know it’s crazy, but I was just worried about you when you were out of my sight.”

“I’m fine. Nothing bad is going to happen to me,” she promised, even though she had no real authority to make such a promise. Life had its way of happening with no influence.

“Just stay home and get well, and then I’ll feel better,” he begged. 

“Okay. We’ll stay right here,” she agreed, feeling safe. 

Zeren held her for a moment, hesitating to tell her news he’d been holding onto for several days. “I’m going on a show in a few weeks?” he finally said. 

“Oh? What kind of show?” she asked curiously. 

“It’s a dancing show. It’s called the Masked Dancing King.”

“That sounds perfect for you.” She smiled. “Where are you shooting it?”

“In Shanghai. I’ll be gone for at least a week, maybe more depending on how well I do.”

“I’m sure you’ll do very well. You’re already my dancing king.” Normally she would have turned around to face him and kiss him, but that would have put her on her bad side, so she just took his hand and kissed that instead. 

“Will you miss me?” he wondered, a little bit needy. 

“Of course I will miss you.”

“How much?”

She sat up so she could turn around and then got on top of him. “This much,” she said as she bent down to kiss him. 

“Qiao, be careful,” he mumbled against her kisses. 

She ignored him. “I’ll miss your kisses, and your touch, and your warmth.” She tried to hide it, but she couldn’t hold back a wince at the sudden twinge of pain in her side. 

“Qiao!” he said, almost like a scold, as she got off of him and came down on his other side. He sat up quickly. “What did I tell you?!” It was hard to tell if he was more concerned or angry. 

“Don’t get mad at me. I’m the one who’s hurt,” she pouted. 

“I am mad at you. You’re the one who’s hurt, and you don’t listen.”

“Zeren,” she whined, pulling on his shirt. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to show you that I love you, and I will miss you.”

Zeren softened a little. Then he sighed. “I’m worried you won’t take good care of yourself while I’m gone.”

“When do you leave?”

“In about ten days.”

“I’m going to be much better by then. I probably won’t even be on any medicines anymore. Besides, I’m not actually a baby, you know?” She scoffed and turned her face away from him. 

“I think you’re better off when I’m around to take care of you,” he told her, not very gently. 

“I made it through twenty-four years of my life without your help. I’ll be fine.” She covered her face with her arm. 

Neither of them said anything for a minute. Zeren’s heart beat loudly as his mind tried to reach back to where they’d both somehow gotten angry. 

“I appreciate all you’ve done for me, and I love that you’re so caring and attentive, but I don’t like you acting like I’m a child. It makes me feel like you don’t think I’m capable,” she said, without removing her arm from her face so he wouldn’t see her hurt, teary eyes. 

Zeren leaned back onto his elbow and gently pulled her arm away. “I don’t mean to make you feel that way. I know you are capable. It’s just...the idea of something happening to you because I wasn’t here…”

She reached her casted hand up to brush the hair out of his eyes before it fell back down as she brushed his cheek. “There’s no point in worrying about it. If something’s going to happen--and it isn’t--there isn’t anything we can do about it. It isn’t your job to protect me from harm. I promise to take extra good care of myself, okay? I’ll remember to eat and sleep. I’ll be a perfect functioning adult, okay?”

“I just want to come back to a happy, healthy Zhengqiao. So don’t do anything to hurt yourself, please,” he said, looking down at her side. 

She held up three fingers. “I promise not to show you anymore physical affection.”

“You didn’t have to say it like that,” he laughed. He held her bad hand gently and leaned over her to give her a small kiss. Then he laid back down beside her. 

“Of course, I’ll be very happy when you come home. But I’ll be so proud of you while you’re there.” He looked at her a little sadly. “Please don’t be sad about going,” she begged him. “You need and you want to work. I know you do. And if you really don’t then quit this gig, because if you don’t want it there’s no point in us going through all this trouble and turmoil of being secret. If you don’t want it then we’ll walk out on the street and confess our undying love for one another. Right?”

He laughed a little. “I do want it. You’re right. But is it wrong to want both?”

“Of course not. But we have to make a choice. At least for now.”


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a little bit of everything, and it may be a little awkward. Idk why I don't like to post little chapters so really this is like several small things smushed together. Starts out with a little smut just because. Then I wanted to give her a little time with Quanzhe (fan service to my number 1), and then I wanted to illustrate what it would be like for her to be alone and where's she's at with herself. Some of it might make more sense in the next chapter??? Honestly idk. I've had too much alcohol and not enough sleep yesterday but I'm ready to move on in the story and I hate skipping things I've already written so yeah....Happy New Year!!

On the morning he had to leave Qiao entered the bathroom without knocking while Zeren showered. "I just need to brush my teeth," she said, reaching for her toothbrush.< /p>

Zeren froze. His mind too blank to respond, too surprised to do anything but stand still, holding his cock in his hand. 

Somehow she sensed he was too still. He wasn't washing his hair or his body. "Did I...? Are you...? Sorry," she mumbled. She dropped her toothbrush and quickly left the bathroom. 

"Qiao!" Zeren yelled after her, suddenly regaining his senses. He shut off the water and quickly wrapped a towel around himself before he rushed out after her. 

Qiao was rummaging around mindlessly for...she didn't know what. 

"Qiao, don't freak out. I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "I'm not freaking out." She couldn't look at him yet. "It's fine. You do what you gotta do."

Water dripped in Zeren's eyes, and he brushed his hair back with his hand. Otherwise he didn't move.

"I know. It's been a while. And that's my fault." She still appeared to be looking for something, but she wasn't really. She stopped and looked at him. "But I would do stuff for you, you know. You're the one who doesn't want to," she concluded quietly. She looked at the water glistening on his abs and then quickly away.

Zeren sighed. "You know it's not that I don't want to." He took a few steps toward her until he was close enough to tuck her hair behind her ear. "I was thinking about you," he told her, hoping that made it better.

Qiao didn't want to be upset. She knew it was ridiculous, but it didn't make her feel any less sad about being left out. "That's not the point."

"What can I do?" he asked gently.

"Nothing. It's fine. Go finish your shower." She turned her face away.

"I'm finished," he said, bringing her face back to his with his hand. He kissed her softly.

"You have a flight to catch," she told him.

"I have at least an hour before I have to go," he said between kisses.

"Zeren," she laughed his name. 

"You said you could do stuff, right?" He moved his mouth to her neck. She sighed shakily as he sucked gently on her.

"I did."

Zeren placed her good hand on his abs. "What kind of stuff?" he breathed. 

She ran her hand slowly across his defined stomach and exhaled a jagged breath. Her hand slipped between the towel and his skin, and the loosely wrapped cloth fell to the floor, exposing him to her. Zeren pulled aside the fabric of her shirt so he could kiss and suck at the flesh of her shoulder. Her fingers inched progressively down to his half-hard cock until they reached down to fondle his balls. He sucked in a breath, sensitive and taken by surprise. He hardened a little more and returned to kissing her. She stroked his cock gently and slowly until he was fully erect. 

"Qiao, I'm sorry," he said, taking his lips from her momentarily.

"You don't have to be sorry. You just have to ask," she smiled.

"Qiao, can I please feel your mouth on my cock," he asked in a shuddering breath as she rubbed him.

Her grin grew wider. "Was that so hard?"

He chuckled softly, and she pushed his hips back until he sat on the edge of the bed before she sank to her knees. She licked the head of his cock and wrapped her lips around him. Little by little she took more of him into her mouth. She relaxed her throat and found her rhythm. He tasted clean, like nothing but skin. When he was getting close she took him out of her mouth with a pop and stroked him steadily with her hand until he came on her face. 

“Holy shit, Qiao.” He smiled a happy and relaxed smile. “That’s so much better than doing it by myself.” She laughed and reached for his towel to wipe him off her face. He grabbed her wrist. “Wait.”

“What?” she asked, looked up at him while he stared down at her. 

“I just want to remember this face...for later.”

She laughed heartily. “Take a picture. It will last longer,” she teased. Before she could move he reached over to the bedside table and grabbed his phone, opening the camera. “Are you serious?”

“This is seriously what I’m going to think about until I come home,” he replied. She smiled and let him take the picture. 

An hour later she’d washed her face and he’d gotten dressed and got his things together to leave. Qiao stood by the entry way with Shadow in her arms and Quanzhe at her side while Zeren did one last check for his phone and wallet. 

“Are you going to miss us?” Qiao asked, holding Shadow close to her face. 

“I miss you already,” he assured her and kissed her forehead. “Don’t work too hard while I’m gone, okay. Don’t forget to take your medicine and eat on time. And promise me you’ll rest.”

“I’ve got it, mom.” She rolled her eyes jokingly. 

“Quanzhe, don’t let her do anything crazy while I’m gone, okay?” Zeren looked to the younger boy for an ally. Quanzhe saluted in response. 

“I promise you’ll find me better than you left me,” Qiao assured him. “Work hard, and do your best.” Zeren smiled and rolled his luggage out the door. 

“Fighting!” the other two said in unison as the door closed behind him. 

“I feel like it’s always you and me here when everyone leaves,” Qiao said quietly, looking at the closed door. 

“I know, but the company’s not bad,” Quanzhe replied and reached for Shadow. 

Quanzhe and Qiao spent several days goofing around. He had some work to do here and there, but for the most part they just hung out. They binged ‘Sweet Tai Chi’ after Quanzhe confessed he’d never seen it. On more than one occasion she acted as his camera woman and helped him craft moody Douyin posts. She taught him how to cook meals other than noodles. 

One afternoon, after working on a product advertisement, Quanzhe came home to find Qiao laying in the middle of the studio floor, daydreaming again. She was clearly lost in her own world, so he left her for a little while, reluctant to pull her from what must have been nice thoughts, judging by the calm smile on her face. He went to his room and changed before picking up the notebook sitting on his nightstand. He looked over the words he’d written there again. He made a few adjustments and a few additions, and after half an hour had passed he worked up his courage. Quanzhe walked back across the apartment to the studio. Qiao was still laying there, but her smile had faded. He wondered briefly if she was thinking about the fact that Zeren hadn’t called in days. She’d mentioned it that morning, briefly, and then acted like it wasn’t important. 

Quanzhe knocked on the door frame. “Are you busy?” he asked, and she laughed just a little. 

“Very. What’s up?” she asked without moving.

“Um...I…” he stammered nervously. 

Qiao pulled herself into a sitting position and looked at him quizzically. He wasn’t one to stammer. “What’s up?” she asked again. 

“I wrote something, and I was wondering if you would take a look at it,” he spat out. 

Her lips curled in pleasant amusement. Quanzhe held his notebook out to her without meeting her eyes, and she reached up to take it. Her smile grew as she read his words, and her head seemed to bob to the rhythm she found in his lyrics. She brought the notebook down into her lap and looked up at the little brother. 

“These are really sweet, didi. May I ask where you got the inspiration?”

“From my sisters.”

“Sisters?” She cocked her head to the side. “I thought you only had one little sister.”

“I do. She’s still pretty young, but I hope one day she’ll grow up to be like you,” he told her. 

Qiao’s eyes watered and her lips formed a different kind of smile. “Quanzhe,” she said very quietly. 

“I mean, I hope she doesn’t end up in this industry, and I really hope she never tries to date an idol, but if she’s as brilliant, hardworking and kind as you, I’ll be really happy.”

“Quanzhe, stop!” she cried and clammored to her feet. “You’re really gonna make me cry.” She threw her arms around him and held him tight. After a moment she released him and bent down for his notebook. “These are really excellent,” she complimented. 

“Thanks. I’ve been working on them for a while, but it’s the first time I’ve ever written a whole song.” He took it back from her and held it tightly in his hands. “Do you think you could write music for it? I think...I think that it would be a good song for our fans, too.”

“I would be honored,” she replied, smiling widely again. “Give me a little time.”

“Sure. No rush.” He smiled back. Qiao squealed with delight and threw her arms around him again. 

Qiao became nocturnal, as was a large part of her creative process. She found it easiest to work at night when things were quiet. There were fewer distractions, fewer needs to be met, fewer obligations to fulfill. A night of creative work was out of time and space, unrestricted. She was really impressed by what Quanzhe had written and touched by what he had told her, too. It took her a while not to tear up just to think of it. She was pleased, but also a little embarrassed that she had inspired him. She was determined to give his song all the care and detail it deserved, so she worked all the way through that first night, and was still awake when Quanzhe got up to leave the next morning. He followed the sounds of the keyboard down the hall to her. 

“Have you been up all night?” he asked in disbelief.

“Is it morning now?” she wondered, looking around for her phone. 

“Yes! I’m about to leave. You better get some sleep today, or Ren-ge is going to kill me.”

“Have you talked to him?” she wondered. She had realized for the first time that she could’ve actually talked to him if she hadn’t been so obsessive last night. She wasn’t even sure where her phone was. It was his obsession that was causing him to miss all her calls in the first place, at least that was what she was telling herself. He always texted after she’d gone to sleep to see if she was up, but she never was. 

“He won’t know a thing,” she scoffed a little and then yawned. “But yes, sleep. I will get some.” She stretched and stood from the bench. 

“Okay. I’ll see you later.” He was a little concerned, but she was already following him down the hallway, so he hoped she would follow through. 

“Bye,” she said drowsily. She was already buried under the covers and darkness before she heard the door close behind him. 

Qiao woke up late. It was almost noon, but she had stayed up until almost four working on Quanzhe’s song again. She trudged out of her room toward the kitchen in time to see Quanzhe dragging out his suitcase. She rubbed her eyes, as if they were deceiving her. 

“Going somewhere?” she mumbled. 

Quanzhe scratched the back of his neck. “Uh, yeah...I’m going to Changsha to do a show,” he said awkwardly. 

Qiao blinked at him. “For how long?”

“A couple of weeks.”

“When were you going to tell me?” 

“Today.”

“What if I hadn’t come out just now?”

“I was gonna text you!”

“You-!” She grabbed a pillow and threw it at him. “You’re leaving me here all alone?”

“I’m sorry.” He frowned. 

She huffed. “It’s fine. Go.” She flopped on the couch dramatically. 

“No hug goodbye?” 

“I’ll text it to you.”

Quanzhe sighed. He deserved that. He knew she wasn’t going to like being alone, and so he’d hesitated until the last moment to tell her. He felt genuinely bad for leaving her alone. He’d never actually been alone in the apartment for more than a few hours before. But, they both knew he had to do what he had to do. 

“Bye, jiejie,” he said quietly as she grabbed the remote and switched on the TV. 

The appellation softened her a little. “Bye, little ham,” she said back and gave him a weak smile as he waved goodbye, pulling his suitcase behind him. 

The apartment was a little eerie when it was empty like that. When she didn’t have the TV or music on, the quietness was a bit unsettling. She was thankful for Shadow being another sign of life around the place. She knew she should get out, but she didn’t know where she would go. In the months that she had been living in Beijing, Qiao hadn’t developed any local habits. Not so much as a cafe she liked to go to. She wasn’t even sure what was near or what was interesting. She had built her life there around the apartment, and the boys, and Yuehua. Their absence was not only noticeable, but suffocating. Besides that, she hadn’t had much money to spend on buying things or eating things before. But her first royalties check had hit just a few days earlier, and that wasn’t a problem anymore. 

She texted Zeren the usual thing: checking to see if he’d rested and eaten, how he was doing and how work was going. She’d sent him a couple of funny memes, but he hadn’t reacted much to them and so she was just respecting his space and keeping quiet. She thought, rightly, that he was going through his own obsessive process, just like she did. They shared drive and focus, so she could respect that. But she regretted that she wasn’t able to be there to take care of him while he worked the way he did for her. She felt a weird sort of envy over it. She would have liked to be able to walk into whatever studio he was dancing in and interrupt and insist that he have dinner with her and come to bed at a reasonable hour, but she couldn’t. She didn’t hear from him until the night after Quanzhe had left. She didn’t tell him anything about their little brother being gone, or how eerie it was to be in the apartment alone, or about how much she really missed him. She didn’t want to distract him from his work or make him worry, so she just kept it to herself. 

By the second day that Quanzhe was gone she had already had enough of sitting around the quiet, empty apartment. She took her time showering and blow drying her hair, just to kill time. She put on a pretty summer dress and even put on a little makeup. 

She didn’t know exactly where she was going, but she set out to explore the neighborhood anyway. She wandered idly through some clothing stores, but her clothes were starting to feel a little tight after weeks of eating a lot and not dancing with Zeren, so she didn’t really feel like trying anything on. She strolled for several blocks, but she wasn’t enjoying the crowded streets. She was never a big fan of crowded places, and now it was making her feel even lonelier somehow. Eventually she found herself at a large bookstore that had a cafe inside. She took her sweet time browsing the shelves before she decided on a romance novel and a xianxia novel. She paid for the books and a latte and sat herself at a small table, not quite ready to return to the lonesome apartment yet. The romance novel she had chosen was funny and she had to cover her mouth as she laughed too loudly at the banter between the protagonists. She lifted her cup to her lips only to discover she’d finished her drink. Still not ready to go back, she decided to get another one. She thanked the barista and turned happily right into a man, spilling coffee all over the both of them.

“Oh, god, I’m so sorry!” she cried. She turned around to set the cup down on the counter and reached for napkins. Without thinking she began to pat the coffee off the man’s blazer until she realized how awkward that was and he was just standing there, hands in the air. She handed him a fistful of clean napkins. “Sorry,” she said again quietly but screaming on the inside. She looked up at his face, expecting to see an older man, judging by how nice his clothes were, but found he was probably a couple of years older than her, and quite good looking. 

“That’s okay,” he smiled as he wiped his clothes himself. “It was my fault. Let me buy you a new coffee,” he offered. 

“Oh, that’s okay. That’s probably the universe telling me not to have anymore. I’m going too fast!” she babbled nervously. 

“Does the universe talk to you often?” the man wondered. 

“All the time,” she smiled. 

A beat passed while he smiled back at her. Then he spoke again. “Well, then I can buy you something other than coffee. You already paid for your drink.”

‘It’s no big deal. I’m rich,’ she thought, imagining fanning herself with bills. “No really, I ruined your suit, I should buy you a drink.”

“Okay,” he smiled, equally satisfied with that arrangement. “You can buy me a drink, and tell me what the universe says, and I can listen to you laugh for a while.”

She cocked her head at him and scrunched her eyebrows. 

He sighed and let his hands fall to his sides. “Okay, truthfully I came over here to talk to you because I heard you laughing earlier and I wanted to hear more.”

“Oh.” She blushed and looked at the ground. 

“And I’m sorry. This is not cool. Just forget it.” He sighed again with a touch of nervous laughter. 

“No. Honestly, normally that would really work on me. I mean you complimented me and you’re cute, but-”

“But you have a boyfriend.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“I figured the odds on that were high, but I had to shoot my shot, you know?”

“Respect.”

“Well, sorry, again. And I hope your boyfriend makes you laugh and treats you well.” There wasn’t any sarcasm or bitterness in his tone, but perhaps a bit of regret. 

“Thanks. He does,” Qiao smiled shyly as she took a couple steps toward her table, picked up her books and waved with a small “bye bye.”

She felt like an absolute moron. She couldn’t have been more awkward if she had tried. As she walked home she replayed that scene in her head as if she weren’t dating one of the most handsome and talented men in the world, as if she weren’t going home to the apartment she shared with NEXT. She thought about how the Qiao from six months ago would have reacted to that situation, and even though she wouldn’t trade positions with past her for all the world, she couldn’t escape how utterly alien it felt in that moment to be who she was now. 

She returned to the apartment that felt like a shell. There was just too much room for her alone, especially when it felt like it didn’t belong to her. She had come in and made a little space for herself, but it wasn’t her apartment. She was a squatter and it felt especially suspicious of her to be there alone. Still, she didn’t leave for the next several days. She cleaned every room but the ones belonging to Xinchun, Chengcheng, Quanzhe and Justin. She ate everything that was in the fridge. But mostly she spent far too much time listening to the silence of the apartment and thinking of what it meant, and who she was when she was alone there.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst and smut. Smut and angst.

Zeren hadn’t worked this hard at dance alone in years. Not since Idol Producer. There were also photoshoots, promotional spots and other pieces to film, but most of his time was dedicated to choreographing and working with the dancers. And it felt great. The creative outlet was just what he needed, and the time crunch was a great excuse for his obsessive behavior. His ability to focus on the work and ignore everything else almost matched Qiao’s, except that his tasks made the need to eat and sleep a little more obvious. Besides, he had the other dancers to worry about, so he tried not to forget meals. But he always stayed for hours after he’d told everyone else to go home. For the first few days, when he finally called it quits around midnight, he always had missed calls from Qiao, but eventually she stopped calling. 

“Sorry,” he would text back. “Just got back to the hotel. You up?” Usually there was no response until the next morning, which relieved him because it meant she was sleeping. 

“Sorry I missed you again. Don’t work too hard,” she’d text back in the morning. 

He told himself he was working hard for her, so she’d be proud of him. He wanted to do well for her. And that was all true, but it wasn’t the reason for his obsessiveness. That was just natural to him. If anyone could understand that it was her, so he excused himself, and he knew she would, too. He had worked for years to debut and break through in this business and it wasn’t happening exactly the way he had hoped or expected, but it was happening. There were times when he wished the band would just be together, that they were making music and performing for their fans. While he worked he thought constantly about what she had said weeks before, about how he wanted and needed to work. He wondered how hard he’d have to work to reach a point where he could live peacefully with her, openly. Was there a level he could reach where he wouldn't lose fans just because he loved a woman, a woman who wanted to see him on stage as much as they did? He hoped he could work for such freedom. Until then he knew that more work and more success would take him farther and more frequently from her. He regretted not calling, but the longer he went without talking to her the more guilty he felt, so he continued to put it off. 

After they finished filming the first performance he finally went back to the hotel at a decent hour and decided it would be best to call her with the bittersweet news that he would be staying at least one more week.

“Hey, Ze!” she answered brightly. “What’s up? Long time, no talk.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” he said regretfully. 

“No worries. I’m just giving you a hard time. Are you okay?”

“I’m great. I passed the first performance. I’ll be staying another week at least,” he told her monotonously. 

“That’s great, babe!” she replied without missing a beat. No hint of sadness in her tone at all, and he didn’t know why that bothered him a little. “I knew you’d be great. I’m so proud of you.”

“Thanks, Qiao. What are you doing?” he wondered idly, ready to hear her talk about herself. 

“I’m just laying in bed with Shadow. Probably going to fall asleep soon.”

“Isn’t it a little early? Did you eat dinner? Are you feeling okay?”

Qiao laughed. “Daddy’s worried about me, Shadow,” she teased to the cat. “It’s almost ten. Yes, I ate dinner. And I’m feeling fine. No need to trouble yourself.” She didn’t know where the passive aggressive tone was coming from. 

“Qiao, you know I’ve been worrying about you.” 

She bit back all her snarky passive aggressive comments. She hadn’t realized just how neglected she truly felt, but she didn’t want to use this time to pick a fight with him over it. She sighed heavily. “I know.”

“I’ve been working really hard. We’re more alike than you know.”

“I know.”

“Do you know everything?” 

“I know that since we’re so alike it won’t do any good for me to tell you not to work too hard, or to take care of yourself. But I love you, so I’ll tell you anyway.”

“I’ll listen to you, I promise. I miss you,” he said sadly. 

“Do you?” she wondered, her feelings overtaking her mouth again. 

“Of course I do. Don’t be mad at me, baby,” he begged. 

“I’m not mad. I just feel like if you missed me you’d call me or something. Send me selfies. Anything. I miss seeing you and talking to you.” She was pouting and he could hear it even if he couldn’t see her. 

“I’m sorry. I’ll try to be better this week,” he promised, but he wasn’t really.

When Zeren got home it was already evening, and the apartment was totally dark. He slipped off his shoes and his jacket and left his luggage by the door.

"Qiao?" he called into the emptiness as he flicked on the living room lights. There was no one there. He called her name again as he turned down the hall to his bedroom, but there was no response. He went to his own room and turned on the light, but it was empty there, too. The bed was made, which seemed unusual. Thinking perhaps she wasn't home, he stepped into the hallway again and called for Shadow. From the room next door he heard a small meow, and then her thin black body slinked through the crack in the door to Zhengting's room. She came to rub herself against Zeren's leg. He picked her up and noticed how she'd gotten bigger while he was gone. 

"What were you doing in there?" he wondered aloud as he held the creature to his chest and scratched behind her ears. He went down to the room she had come from and pushed the door open. It was dark inside, so he turned on the lights to see a Qiao sized lump hidden under the blanket on what he would consider her old bed. He walked to the bed and gently pulled back the cover to reveal her head. 

"Qiao?" he asked as she slowly responded to the light. "Are you okay?"

She rubbed her eyes. "I'm fine," she mumbled.

"Are you sick?" He put his hand to her forehead. 

"No, I'm fine," she said a little more clearly. She suddenly sat up and threw her arms around his neck. “I'm glad you're home! I missed you. I wasn’t sure you were ever coming home to me.”

"Silly girl. Why are you sleeping? It's 7 pm."

She shrugged. "I was bored. And it's been so lonely here."

"Lonely? Where's Quanzhe?" he wondered as he hugged her tightly.

"He left for Changsha a week ago," she informed him. 

"What? How come no one told me?" He pulled away to see her face.

"He didn't tell me until he was leaving. And I didn't want you to worry about me being here alone," she admitted, looking down at her hands.

"You've been lonely?" His voice was more sympathetic than curious. She nodded. "I'm sorry. And I've been too busy to take your calls."

"I didn't want you to feel bad, so I didn't tell you."

“I wish you had.” He brushed her hair back and looked sadly at her. "How are you otherwise? Any pain? Are you taking your medicine?"

"I'm fine. No more medicine. I went to the doctor, and he said everything is healing properly. I'm supposed to do some exercise now." She suddenly smiled at him, and he smiled back.

"I'm not going to hurt you?" he asked. She shook her head.

Suddenly he gripped the back of her head and brought their mouths together in a passionate kiss. They'd each been missing each other's bodies, and there wasn't any time to waste. 

"Wait," he said, breaking them apart. "Why are you sleeping in here?" 

"Seemed a little less lonely," she shrugged.

He took her hand and pulled her toward their room. Without any further hesitation he tugged at the hem of her shirt, and she raised her arms so he could pull it over her head. She wasn't wearing a bra, so there was no more barrier between him and her tender breasts. He quickly noted that the bruise on her right side was completely healed, and to him it was like a green light to surge ahead. Perhaps a bit more roughly than he had intended, he pushed her shorts to the floor and then pushed her onto the bed. She scooted herself backwards and he followed her like a magnet. When she tried to reach for his belt buckle he grabbed her wrists and held her back, trying to be gentle with her casted arm. 

"It's my turn right now," he insisted. She smiled and dropped her hands back.

Zeren kissed her again and cupped her breasts in his hands. They felt bigger than he remembered. His kisses drifted down her neck and over her collarbone until he arrived at her nipple. He took it into his mouth hungrily and enjoyed the scent of her and the saltiness of her skin. She whined at the sensitivity, and he moved to the other nipple while rubbing the first one. 

"God, I've missed you," he said thickly, barely moving his mouth from her skin. She giggled.

Slowly he worked his kisses down toward her hips. He felt her ass and her thighs with his hands, taking greedy handfuls of her and holding her tight. For what seems like a long time he just touched and kissed her legs, feeling the way she'd gone soft in the weeks without dance practice and feeling intoxicated by her warmth until slowly his kisses and caresses led him to his favorite part. He took a moment to admire her, the way she was swollen and wet from the anticipation he had built. She squirmed a little when he ran his tongue ever so lightly along her outer folds, on one side and then the other. She hadn't even touched herself in such a long time, all her nerve endings ignited in surprise. He pressed his flat tongue to her more firmly and she shivered. He looked back up at her with large soft eyes as he dipped his tongue into her warm, wet juices and slid slowly up to her clit. His lips kissed her there, gently pulling at her to coax her arousal. His slow licks turned faster and when she came he still wouldn't let up until she was screaming his name. 

"Fuck, Zeren!" she squealed until it became a whine and she had to push his head away. 

He came up grinning. "That was just an apology for leaving you here all alone," he said as he got off the bed. 

She sat up, breathing heavy and thankful it didn't hurt. "Where are you going now?" she asked, pouting.

"Nowhere," he assured her as he quickly unbuckled his belt and stripped his clothes faster than she would've thought possible. He hurried back onto the bed with her, between her legs again, and she was thrilled to get her hands on his thin, muscular frame. 

"I've really...missed you," she said between kisses as she pulled him down on top of her. His skin was smooth and warm against hers, and it felt just like heaven. 

"I know, baby, but I'm home now. And I'm not going anywhere." He brushed her hair back to admire her face. "I'm going to spend days with you here. Just like this." 

"Are you gonna fuck me, daddy?" She asked in a sweet voice. 

"Fuck, baby," he growled. "I love it when you say things like that to me." He ran his hand down her side, from her breast to her hip. "Say it again."

"Fuck me, daddy," she whispered close to his ear. 

His eyes closed briefly and then flashed at her. "You want me baby?" he asked very quietly, and she nodded. Without taking his eyes away from hers, he reached down to adjust himself and entered her slowly and smoothly, bringing ecstasy to both of them, but neither closed their eyes. With one hand he held himself up and with the other he held her cheek, fixated in the most intimate kind of love making, the kind that united them completely, where they were one, no separation at all. It was the kind of lovemaking that made all the loneliness disappear. When it was over they didn't let go, only adjusted so he was laying in her arms, together in quiet satisfaction. 

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" Zeren asked when the cloud of ecstasy had dispersed. 

"Not at all," she assured him delightfully. 

He reached out for a blanket and shook out over them so he could cuddle with her more cozily as the sweat of exertion started to evaporate off his body. He switched positions with her after the post-orgasm vulnerability of wanting to be held gave way to his usual desire to be the one holding her.

"It's nice to finally be home with you," he said when they'd settled in.

"I guess being apart for work is something I'll have to get used to." She buried her face against his bare chest.

"I'm sorry," he told her, feeling guilty.

She lifted her head. "I wasn't blaming you. I've had to leave, too. It's just something we have to face. Didn’t we agree we’d stop saying sorry for the things we have to do."

"I'm still sorry. I don't like being apart from you." He pulled her closer into him, just to emphasize his point. “What are you working on these days?” he asked casually as he drew shapes on the skin of her arm. 

“Not much, really. I was working on a song with Quanzhe, but I have this weird feeling. It’s blocking everything,” she said vaguely, regretting having said anything after it was too late. 

“What’s wrong? Can I help?”

She sighed, wishing she hadn’t brought it up. “It’s nothing,” she responded quietly. 

Zeren furrowed his brow. “It’s clearly not. Is it something I did?”

“No. It’s not your fault. It’s really not a big deal. I guess it’s just the loneliness. I’m not used to being alone. I guess it got to me.”

Zeren shifted so he could look at her face, taking her chin with his fingertips to get a better angle. “What am I missing?” he wondered. 

She sighed heavily. “Really, it’s just me.” He wasn’t convinced, so he waited for more. “I don’t want to make something out of nothing, and I don’t want you to get upset.”

“Not wanting me to get upset isn’t a good reason to not tell me what you’re feeling. And I can’t tell you if it’s nothing unless you tell me what it is. So, spit it out.” He was getting a little impatient at her evasiveness. 

Qiao sat up and sighed again. “It’s just...when I came here, I never expected to be alone. And that isn’t the problem. It’s that, if I wasn’t here, there would be no one. And...I don’t know...if this place is like the center for all of you, and there’s no one here to hold it together…” A tear fell quickly down her cheek. 

“You’re worried we’re falling apart,” he concluded. 

That was her fear. “No,” she sniffed. “That’s not going to happen.”

Zeren frowned and wiped the tear off her cheek. “It’s okay, Qiao. We’re all a little worried about that.”

“I won’t let it happen,” she told him resolutely.

He took her good hand and squeezed it tightly. “Listen. You’re very talented, but you can’t write us out of this situation. Even if you write us the album of the year, whether NEXT is a musical group or seven guys with seven different careers isn’t up to you. At the end of the day, it isn’t even up to us. It’s up to Yuehua.” Instead of making her feel better, his words invited more tears. “Hey,” he said, pulling her into his chest. “I hate it, too. I know it feels awful. We just have to keep doing the best we can and go as far as it will take us. But no matter what happens to this group, you and I are going to keep going, keep supporting each other until the end, right?”

Qiao nodded against his chest. “Always,” she promised him. That idea calmed her nerves a little and her tears slowed. “I’m sorry,” she said, pushing herself away from him. 

“It’s okay,” he assured her, stroking her hair. “It scares me, too.”

“I’m sorry for crying on you, and bringing up unpleasant things.” She wiped at his chest. 

“Those are two things you don’t have to worry about with me. No matter how unpleasant, I’ll always be here to comfort you. That includes if you’re lonely, even if there’s nothing I can do to help. I want the chance to at least try.”

“What if I just want you to focus on work and not worry about me?”

“Do you think work is more important to me than you?” His tone suggested that the mere thought was ridiculous, but she said nothing for a moment. “Qiao?!”

“Not that it’s more important. No. But your work is of the moment, and it requires a certain amount of attention, and me and my problems are just a bit more permanent. We’ll still be here, and I’m used to dealing with them myself.”

Zeren wrapped his arms around her and pushed her down to the mattress. He wrapped his legs around her, too, and pressed his body weight onto her. “Qiao,” he said, muffled into her hair before pulling back just enough to kiss her cheek. “Any problem you have is my problem. And any problem _we_ have we can face together. Happy, sad, messy, hard, fun, I want it all and not a bit less. You understand?”

“Gosh, you’re so dramatic,” she teased. 

“I will show you dramatic!” he declared, and proceeded to pepper her with kisses on every convenient piece of flesh until her sides hurt with laughter. “I thought you said you were healed!” he cried, releasing her when she complained of a cramp. 

“I am! But I’m still human.” Qiao leaned in to kiss him and ran her hand down his warm side. Eagerly he massaged her breast. He smiled.

"Your boobs have gotten bigger. I think you've put on weight," he said as he pulled away to admire them.

"I've what?" She asked. His tone warned him off.

"Uh..." 

"Jerk," she muttered, pulling away from him. 

He grabbed her wrist. "Babe, wait. No. I didn't mean it the way you're taking it. It's a good thing."

"Easy for you to say. You're so thin and fit."

"Baby, you've been recuperating. Resting and eating well. I'm happy. You look great."

She rolled her eyes, not placated by his attempts. "You should just stop talking. Get dressed and meet me in the studio."

"Qiao!" he called after her as she walked out of the room.

"Now!" she yelled back.

Zeren sighed and got out of bed. He pulled some random clothes out of his dresser and pulled his sweat pants on, and then walked down the hall to the studio with his shirt still in his hands. Qiao was there stretching. He took her hand and pulled her close to him.

"Qiao, really. I wasn't trying to insult you. I love your body." He wrapped his arms tightly around her so she couldn't move. "I really just want to lay in bed and feel you. Please come back," he whispered. She struggled against him. "Qiao, I'm tired. I've been dancing for two weeks straight," he whined. 

"Fine. You can go back to bed. I'll be here, trying to work off all this fat," she said gruffly.

He pulled back. "I never used that word," he said firmly. He examined her face for a moment, an expression of anger mixed with hurt. "I didn't think you were that sensitive about your body," he admitted.

She narrowed her eyes at him in a look that called him an idiot. "All girls are sensitive about their bodies, even if they don't show it."

"But, you're beautiful and sexy." He tried to coax her by kissing her softly.

"But one day what if I'm not and there are other beautiful and sexy women around you?" she pouted.

"Even if that could happen, it wouldn't matter because it's pretty low on the list of reasons that I love you, silly girl." He tugged on her. "No one competes with you, Qiao."

She frowned and rested her head on his shoulder. "You don't want to dance with me? Is it because you find me unattractive?"

"Oh my god. You way misinterpreted what I said. What I was trying to say was that I like your boobs! Can we please go back to bed so I can feel them?" He whined, and she laughed.

"Okay. You can go back to bed. I'll be there in a little while." She pushed away from him and turned toward the mirror. 

Zeren hung his head and sighed. "One song."

"Two."

"Fine. But I get to pick the music."

"Fine."

Zeren picked up her phone and found Open Your Ai. He picked it primarily because alphabetically it would lead into Show You. She grinned when the first song ended and realized this. She gracefully completed the familiar dance with him.

"You know, there are other ways to burn calories than dancing," he said suggestively when he had her pinned against the wall. He leaned forward to kiss her passionately. 

She pushed them both off the wall. "Do you wanna show me?" She took his hand and started toward the door.

He pulled her back. "Since we're here and we're alone. I've always wanted to take you in this studio," he confessed, looking at the room around him.

"In your beloved studio?" She asked, with faked shock. He nodded. "Well, I did just clean the floor yesterday," she smiled.

Zeren sank down to the floor and took her with him. While they were both on their knees he removed the sweater and bra she had put on. Then he laid her on her back. 

"I really don't know how you can underestimate my attraction to you. I don't know what I've done wrong before now," he said as he lowered himself to her. She gasped at the feeling of his tongue on her nipple. He rubbed her other nipple with his thumb and massaged both breasts firmly. 

"How was I supposed to know you'd like me better this way?" She finally managed to say.

He lifted his head. "I like you better every day. I love you just a little more each day. But it has nothing to do with this," he said seriously. He moved so his eyes were level with hers. "Qiao, do you really not understand how deep you are in my heart and soul? Everything I do now has you in it. I don’t know if it’s that deep for you, but you're a part of everything I want now. I can't imagine any future without you. My dreams are the same but I want them for us."

Qiao brought her hand to his cheek. "I understand. My feelings are just as deep for you. I'm just insecure."

"I won't let you be. I'll tell you every day from now on just how perfect and wonderful I think you are," he smiled.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Qixi Festival ("Chinese Valentine's Day" even though I think that sounds dumb) and I attempted humor.

In late August all the boys were home for a few nights in order to participate in a Qixi festival program. The actual program would be filmed live, but they had all come a day early, and after a day full of rehearsals and photoshoots they all met Qiao at the apartment where Xinchun and Quanzhe revealed a surprise.

“We’ve prepared some festivities,” Quanzhe told them, clapping his hands together excitedly. 

“What kind of festivities?” Justin asked skeptically as they all stood in the studio. He really just wanted to go to his room and sleep.

“We are going to play a game to see who is the best couple,” Xinchun announced. 

Zeren scoffed. “Is there any competition?” he asked, smirking at Qiao.

“Hey!” Zhengting reached out to smack him. “We’re a good couple, too!”

“Well, Xinchun and I were talking, and we couldn’t decide, so…”

“You guys were talking about us?” Zhengting asked. 

“Well, we’re the only single guys now, so sometimes we talk about you behind your back,” Xinchun told him. 

“What the fuck?” Justin interjected. 

“Yeah, we’re single! How come we can’t do a group chat?” Chengcheng agreed. 

Quanzhe and Xinchun looked at each other and chuckled. 

“Zeren-ge and Qiao-jie are a new couple, Wenjun-ge and Ting-ge are newly weds, and you two are an old married couple who bicker all the time,” Xinchun explained. 

“Are not!” Justin cried.

“C’mon babe. We’ll smoke ‘em,” Chengcheng said, acquiescing to the game with a little laugh. Afterall, they had been friends for a long time and knew each other very well. 

“Don’t call me ‘babe’!” Justin said, smacking his partner. 

“Okay, so, what do we do?” Qiao asked to get them to settle down. 

“There will be three rounds. The first to determine how much you know about each other. The second to see how much you think alike. And the third to see how well you work together. Each couple will accumulate points to determine which is the best couple.”

“Okay, sit in two rows, facing your partner,” Quanzhe instructed and handed them white boards and markers after they got themselves arranged. Wenjun, Zeren and Chengcheng sat on one side while Zhengting, Qiao and Justin sat across from them. 

“Hey! Why am I on the girls’ side?” Justin whined as he looked at his companions. 

Zhengting lunged across his sister to smack Justin across the head. “There is no girls’ side!”

“Okay, let’s begin with Round 1. This round will judge much you know about your partner. In this round we will ask one row to answer questions about their partner in the other row. The partner answering will write down what they think is correct, and the other partner will write the correct answer. Simple enough?” Xinchun asked. They all nodded. “Okay. Each question in this round is worth 5 points. Let’s start with an easy one, Quanzhe?”

“First question will go to Zhengting’s row. When is your partner’s birthday, and what is their sun sign?” Quanzhe read off his card.

Qiao and Zhengting started writing immediately, but Justin had to think about it.

Chengcheng looked up to see him still thinking after he was finished writing his own birthday. “Seriously? It was just a couple of months ago.”

“I’ve done a lot of stuff since then!” Justin cried. He did his best, but he got it wrong. 

“Scorpios rule!” Qiao said, high fiving Zhengting. Their boyfriends smiled smugly and bumped fists.

“Right. From now on, we’re calling this team team Scorpio, and this team is team Pisces.”

“Next question. What is something your partner secretly hates that you do? The non answering partner should write something that they have never told their partner about.”

“This is too hard. Zhengting tells me about all the things he hates about me,” Wenjun complained. Zhengting wrinkled his nose and kicked gently at his boyfriend. He’d already written his answer. 

“Yeah. And there’s nothing Justin hates about me,” Chengcheng said, only to look over and see Justin writing.

Qiao just grinned and chuckled as she wrote and then looked up to see Zeren doing the same. Wenjun and Chengcheng took another second to think and wrote something quickly.

“Okay, let’s mix it up, Chengcheng, what was your answer?” 

Chengcheng turned his board around: When I eat his food

“Justin?”

“I do hate that, but I said when you talk to me,” Justin replied, turning his board around. 

“You’re ugly for that?” Chengcheng replied, wiping his board clean.

“Okay, okay, Wenjun?”

He turned his board around to reveal: being messy

“I complain about that all the time! It was supposed to be something secret!” Zhengting cried. “I said not texting back.”

“You complain about that all the time, too,” Wenjun yelled, laughing. Zhengting blushed. 

“Okay, Zeren?”

His board just said: wear glasses

Qiao’s mouth fell open and she turned her board to reveal: Wear glasses. “I’ve never told you that!”

“I know.”

“But you still do it.”

“ _I_ like them.”

“Respect.” She smiled at him and he smiled back, causing dimples to cut into his blushing cheeks. 

“Wow. Five points for Qiao and Zeren,” Xinchun announced approvingly.

“Okay, Team Pisces: Name the best gift they ever gave you.” 

“Wenjun gave me a stuffed animal he won from a claw machine,” Zhengting smiled sweetly. Wenjun revealed the same answer on his board.

“It’s obviously Shadow,” Qiao said, and Zeren clapped for himself, both for getting the answer right and for the gift itself.

Justin turned his board around and it just said “nothing.”

“That’s not true! I got you a kebab last year on your birthday,” Chengcheng told him. 

“What? You did not!”

“Well, I got it for you, but then I ate it,” Chengcheng confessed. “But it’s okay, because I wrote ‘nothing,’ too.” He smiled, proud of himself. 

“Great. Five points for everyone!”

“Next question goes to Team Scorpio: What is your partner’s biggest fear?” They all began writing immediately. “Okay, everyone at once. Show your boards.”

Chengcheng and Justin both wrote “birds.” Wenjun and Zhengting both wrote “ghosts.” Zeren wrote “performing” while Qiao wrote “hurting someone.”

“Aw,” he said. 

“I’m not afraid to perform,” she said, a little defensively. 

“You’re too sweet,” he said quietly and moved to give her a quick kiss on the cheek.

“That’s five points for the old married couple and the newly weds.”

”Okay, Team Pisces: What is their favourite personality trait about you?”

Justin didn’t hesitate to write ‘everything,’ while Qiao struggled, hoping that she would be right. Zhengting was confident when he wrote ‘sexy.’

“Qiao-jie?” Quanzhe asked, noting her nervous expression. 

Qiao turned her board around slowly. “Supportive?”

“Hey! You got it right!” Zeren rejoiced, only a little surprised. 

“Zhengting?”

“I said sexy.”

“You are correct.”

“Shallow.”

“You love it.” They both grinned at each other. 

“That’s not even a personality trait,” Chengcheng complained. 

“ _You_ wouldn’t think so because you’re not,” Zhengting fired back.

“Okay, we all know Justin wrote ‘everything,’” Xinchun said, rolling his eyes. “Cheng-ge?”

“Nothing.”

“You idiot. That was so easy. How could you not get the right answer?” Justin asked, kicking his partner. 

“Well, I knew you would write everything, but I didn’t want to lie,” Chencheng replied, causing Justin to kick him harder.

”Next question for Team Scorpio: What's your partner’s weirdest quirk?”

“I don’t have any quirks,” Zhengting said, narrowing his eyes. Quanzhe shushed him. Justin stared Chengcheng down, trying to use telepathy to get his answer. 

“Ren-ge?” Quanzhe asked, noticing his amusement. 

“Qiao can fall asleep anywhere,” Zeren said, almost laughing. 

“That’s true. You do sleep everywhere!” Zhengting agreed.

“Qiao what did you write?” Xinchun asked. She turned the board to reveal ‘sleep anywhere.’

“Wow, you guys are freakishly good at this.” Xinchun had been betting on Zhengting and Wenjun. Wenjun had written ‘wearing facemasks while doing literally anything.’ And Zhengting had actually written ’none.’

“I told you the answer,” Zhengting complained. 

“But it was the wrong answer,” the tall man responded.

“Old married couple?”

“I genuinely couldn’t think of anything remotely quirky about me,” Justin said, showing his blank board. 

“I said you always look at your reflection in cars.”

“That’s not quirky.”

“It’s weird.”

“You’re ugly. You wouldn’t understand.”

”Okay, this will be the last question for Team Pisces: What is your partner’s favorite physical trait about themselves?”

Qiao looked at Zeren, who smiled brightly, and had her answer. 

“Justin?”

“His height,” Justin said, and Chengcheng smiled a genuinely happy smile because it was exactly the right answer. 

“I said hands,” Zhengting revealed. 

“What?!” Justin laughed, thinking it was a silly answer. 

“No, that’s right,” Wenjun confirmed. 

“Ha!” Zhengting yelled at the youngest member. 

“Qiao?” Xinchun asked, rubbing his hands together.

At the same time Zeren and Qiao turned their boards around and both said “Dimples.” Then they laughed because they had spent way too long one night talking about how cute they were.

“Damn,” Xinchun muttered.

“Okay, last question in round 1. What is your partner’s most well-known nickname?”

“This one is easy!” Justin smiled smugly. All of the members of NEXT had fan-given nicknames, but he didn’t know of one for Qiao, so he figured Zeren might not either.

Qiao looked at Zeren over her white board. “Ze, please don’t.”

“But, I know the answer,” he said with big, soft eyes. 

“Don’t do it.”

“But I wanna win.”

“It’s just a game.”

“A game we could _win_.”

“It’s only five points.”

“Five points _we could win!_ ”

The others watched them go back and forth. Of the six of them only Zhengting knew the correct answer. Wenjun was pretty sure he knew, but he wasn’t sure if his memory was right, and he wasn’t supposed to know. That is to say, Qiao wasn’t the one who told him. 

“You’re going to do it,” Qiao sighed. 

“I’m writing it,” he confirmed. 

She hung her head and scribbled on her board. “Ready,” she muttered. 

“Show your answers,” Xinchun ordered excitedly. 

Chengcheng and Justin’s boards both said “Jia Fu Gui.” Wenjun and Zhengting’s both said “Fairy Maiden.” Qiao and Zeren’s boards both said “Pork Chop.”

“Pork chop?!” Chengcheng and Justin both cackled and rolled back on the floor in psychotic laughter. Xinchun tried to hide his laughter behind his notecards. 

“Who called you pork chop?” Quanzhe wondered, smiling but trying not to laugh.

Qiao curled into a ball and hid her face behind her board. “Kids in school,” she mumbled. 

“Because your last name is Zhu?” Xinchun asked. 

“That’s not the only reason,” Zhengting smiled.

“Why?” Quanzhe asked. 

“Have you ever seen her eat?” Wenjun chuckled. 

The Qiao ball exploded and lunged at Wenjun to beat him with her board. When Zhengting pulled her back, laughing all the while, she gave Zeren one good smack on the shoulder, too.

“Sorry, baby,” Zeren said with a frown that couldn’t conceal his grin. She stuck her tongue out at him.

“Okay. Everyone gets five points for that question,” Xinchun said as Chengcheng and Justin pulled themselves together. “And that concludes the first round. Currently Zhengting and Wenjun have 30 points, Qiao and Zeren have 35 points, and Justin and Chengcheng have 20 points.”

“In Round 2 we will test how well you and your partner agree. We will ask a question and you will both write an answer. If your answers match, you will receive 10 points. First question, if you could go on vacation just the two of you, where would you go?”

ZZT: New York BWJ: New York  
ZZQ: anywhere DZR: Italy  
HMH: Tokyo FCC: Tokyo

“Technically, Italy is part of anywhere,” Qiao argued. 

“No,” Xinchun responded firmly. 

Qiao pouted. “Well, we’ve never talked about what we can’t do anyway,” she grumbled. Zeren frowned apologetically while Zhengting rubbed her back. 

“Next question,” Xinchun said, moving on. “Who is more honest?”

ZZT: Wenjun BWJ: me  
ZZQ: Zeren DZR: me  
HMH: me FCC: me

“Well, you are both liars,” Quanzhe laughed at the younger boys. “Next question. Who would win in an eating contest?” All the boys snickered while they wrote, and Qiao could feel herself blushing already. They showed their answers. 

ZZT: pork chop BWJ: pork chop  
ZZQ: me DZR: qiao  
HMH: pork chop FCC: pork chop

“I hate you all. You’re all dead to me,” she muttered as they all laughed. When it went on for more than ten seconds she dropped her board and got up to walk away. 

“Qiao-jie!” they all yelled as she pouted. It was Quanzhe he ran to throw his arms around her and drag her back to her spot, but only Zeren saw the single tear that she quickly wiped away, and he felt guilty. 

“We’re just teasing.” Chengcheng tried to control himself. 

“You have no room to make fun of me!” Qiao said loudly pointing a finger at him. 

“Hey! Don’t lash out at me. I’m not the one who told your secret.” Chengcheng looked at the young man beside him. Zeren just shook his head. Qiao turned her face away and scrubbed the writing off her board. 

“Alright, chill out, children,” Zhengting said calmly. “Let’s get back to the game.” He turned expectantly to Xinchun. 

“Okay. Between the two of you, who is more emotional?” he read off the card.

ZZT: me BWJ: zhengting  
ZZQ: me DZR: me  
HMH: cheng FCC: minghao

“Really?” Qiao asked, surprised. Zeren shrugged. 

“I am not emotional,” Chengcheng argued. 

“You are sooo moody!” Justin said back, to which Chengcheng turned away and pouted. 

“Alright, Wenjun and Zhengting are killing it this round. Who is the funniest?”

ZZT: Wenjun BWJ: Zhengting  
ZZQ: me DZR: Qiao  
HMH: me FCC: me

Zeren was happy just to see a small smile return to Qiao’s face.

“Okay. Last question of round 2. What would you name your first child?”

ZZT: Yueyue BWJ: Yueyue  
ZZQ: idk DZR: idk  
HMH: Xukun FCC: Xukun

“Yueyue?” Justin asked, shocked. 

“Zhengting just likes the way it sounds,” Wenjun shrugged. 

“Why the hell would you name your kid Xukun?” Zhengting wanted to know. 

“Remember when we lost that bet that one time?” Chengcheng responded. 

“Oh right,” he remembered. 

“Qiao-jie, you don’t know what you would name your child?” Quanzhe asked in surprise. 

She shrugged. “I’ve never really thought about it.”

Everyone turned to look at her. “But you’re the one here who could actually have a kid,” Xinchun said in disbelief. 

Qiao tucked her hair behind her ear uncomfortably and averted her eyes. “What? Just because I’m a woman I have to have an answer?” she said defensively. She didn’t want to admit that she wasn’t sure she wanted to have any kids. She hadn’t even said it to Zeren. It never came up when they talked about their futures and she didn’t know how he felt about it either. 

“But you guys could actually have a kid. And soon, based on how you act,” Xinchun replied. 

Zeren shot him a flaming look. “We’ve only been dating for like three months.”

“And we’re still young. Geez. Mind your own business,” Qiao told him harshly. 

“Okay, okay,” Quanzhe interjected to cut the tension. “After round two, the newlyweds got 50 points for a total of 80. The new couple got 40 points for a total of 75 points. And the idiots got 30 points for a total of 50 points.”

Qiao shifted uncomfortably in her spot, not wanting to look at Zeren.

“In the third and final round we will see how well you can work as one. Each of you has one red string.” Everyone stood as Quanzhe passed the strings out to them. “Your task is to tie your red strings to each partner's wrist and then tie them together using only one hand each. The first couple to accomplish their task will earn 50 points. The second couple will earn 25 points. The last couple will earn nothing.”

“Don’t worry. We got this,” Zeren smiled softly at his partner. “Our team work is top notch.” She smiled and nodded her agreement. 

“Okay, you may begin,” Xinchun told them. 

“Jaiyou!” Quanzhe whispered to his favorite couple. 

Without uttering a word and with easy fluidity Zeren and Qiao tied the string to her wrist first, then to his, and finally joined them together. Zeren gave each knot a firm tug to make sure it was secure. Then he took her hand and kissed it before raising them both in the air. “Done!” he announced. 

Wenjun and Zhengting had started by joining their two strings first, which proved more difficult than anticipated as the knot kept slipping free, but they had just finished tying it to Zhengting’s wrist when Zeren declared victory. They continued trying even though they’d already won second by default. Justin and Chengcheng had decided to try to tie their strings to their own wrists themselves, and were failing miserably. 

Quanzhe clapped his hands in full excitement. “Yes! As expected, Qiao-jie and Ren-ge are the best couple!”

“Whatever,” Chengcheng mumbled. “We aren’t even a couple.” But he couldn’t hide his disappointment at losing. 

Zhengting gave up and tied the string to Wenjun’s wrist and then pouted. Wenjun kissed his cheek and intertwined their fingers. 

Zeren spun the string connecting them over Qiao’s head and pulled her against him. “I always win with you,” he said quietly so only she heard before he kissed her forehead, and she couldn’t help smiling back. 

Justin gagged. “Yeah, yeah, we get it! Can we go to bed now?”

“Wait!” Qiao said to their back and they turned around. 

“What’s up, Pork Chop?” Justin asked. 

She rolled her eyes. “Do you guys want to do a late family dinner when you get home tomorrow night?” she asked. 

“Wait, tomorrow is Qixi festival. Shouldn’t you be spending it with me?” Zeren asked, tugging on her string. 

“You’re going to be there aren’t you?” she replied. 

“You’re cooking?”

“I thought we’d do hotpot at home.”

“Of course I’ll be there,” he agreed. 

“Sounds good. We’ll be there, Pork Chop,” Justin smiled and turned to walk away again. 

“Huang Minghao, stop calling me that!” she cried, pulling Zeren with her so she could hit him in the back. 

“Qiao, be careful!” Zeren admonished her for using her cast. Justin walked away undaunted, snickering with Chengcheng. Qiao stomped off to their room, dragging Zeren with her. “Are you mad at me?” he asked. She just sat on the bed and pouted. Without meaning to, she pulled him closer when she crossed her arms over her chest. She looked down at the red string and started to pick at the knot. Before she could get anywhere with it he began to wind the string around his wrist, pulling her wrist away from her fingertips while bringing himself closer to her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t have to do that, but I wanted to be right, and I didn’t know any other nicknames for you.”

“So it’s my fault for having an embarrassing nickname?” she pouted. 

“No. I admit my fault. To be honest, _I_ think it’s kind of cute. But I’ll talk to them about stopping.” He took her hand, united now with his by the string whether she liked it or not, and rubbed his thumb over the back of it soothingly. 

“Don’t bother. They won’t listen to you and they’ll just do it more.”

Zeren brushed her nose with his finger. “Try not to let them get to you. They’re just dumb kids.”

She smiled just a little. “Chengcheng is technically the same age as you,” she reminded him. 

“Only for a few more months,” he defended. “We won. Why so glum?” he asked when her attempted smile fell. 

She touched his collar with her free hand. “I wish I could go to Italy with you.”

“I wish I could take you anywhere,” he agreed before pressing a kiss to her forehead. “But I don’t think it’s that either, is it?” She scrunched up her face. “Was it the kids thing?”

“Kinda…” she admitted. 

“Qiao, I think we were both right. We’ve only been dating a few months, and I don’t think about our age difference a lot, but I’m even younger than you, and I’m really not thinking about it.”

She pulled a lopsided smile. “I agree.”

“See? So we’re great,” he grinned. They had arrived at the same answer after all. “Er, we are safe in that area though, right?” he wondered, thinking of Xinchun’s comment. 

She rolled her eyes because she had tried to explain this to him before. “Yes, Zeren. It’s an IUD. It can stay in there for up to ten years. I’m not having a baby until I’m good and ready. Got it?”

“Got it.” He intertwined his fingers with hers on their tied hands. 

“Are you going to let me go?” she asked with a genuine smile. 

“Not until I’m good and ready.” He smiled brightly. Suddenly she pushed him over onto the bed and got on top of him. She held his hand in hers up above his head and placed kisses on his dimples before peppering the rest of his face with kisses.


	26. Chapter 26

Qiao hadn’t told anyone she was going to get her cast removed that morning. It wasn’t set in stone since she still had to have an x-ray done, but it came back showing her completely healed. She was surprised by the scar left underneath when the cast finally came off, a jagged red and purple line cutting down her arm, but at least she was freed from the plaster. She spent the rest of the day buying and preparing hot pot for the boys with all their favorite ingredients and waited for them to come home. 

Zeren made sure he was the first one in the door when they all arrived. He actually sprinted from the car to the elevator with his arms full of the gifts one of the assistants had gone out to get under his instructions, and pushed the door close button a zillion times in order to shut them out, just to have 2 minutes alone with her. When he walked in she was in the kitchen. He snuck up behind her (she was dancing a little with music blasting) and, wrapping his arms around her, presented her with flowers. She gasped in surprise and took them in her hands. 

“Do we even have a vase for these?” she laughed after sniffing the roses.

“I actually don’t know,” he admitted. 

“You’re so cheesy, but thank you.” He kissed the apple of her cheek where it plumped up from her smile. 

“That’s not all,” he whispered. He let go of her to reach in his pocket and pull out a gold chain necklace with a “D” charm. Smoothly, he hooked it around her neck. She stood on her tiptoes to look at it in the reflection of the microwave. “If anyone asks, it’s ‘D’ for Dior, which it is. But obviously, it’s ‘D’ for ‘Daddy,’” he grinned. 

She wheezed a laugh and turned around in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him sweetly. “I love it. And I love you. Thank you.”

“There’s something else later, but the children will be here in 3, 2, 1…”

As if he were psychic the other six boys came in at exactly the right second. 

“Not cool, Ding-ge!” Justin cried when he got in the door. Qiao hurried to turn down her music. “Do you know how famous I am? I do not wait for elevators.”

“What, they’re just magically always available for you?” Wenjun scoffed. 

“Yes.” Justin began to pull off his jacket aggressively. 

“Okay, everyone go get comfortable and wash up for dinner. I’ve got a mountain of food and we are going to have a nice, relaxing family dinner,” Qiao ordered as the boys dispersed to their rooms. 

Zeren grabbed the gift bag he had brought in with him and hurried off to his room before she could get suspicious. Qiao looked around for a vase, but when she didn’t find one she filled a glass pitcher with water and put the roses in it for the time being. By the time she finished Zeren was back. He took her hand and noticed for the first time that her cast was gone.

“What happened?” he wondered, as if it could have magically fallen off on its own.

“I went to the doctor today and I’m all healed!” she announced happily. 

He smiled broadly. “How do you feel?” he asked, stroking her skin gently. 

“It feels fine. A little strange actually. Lighter. But I have this scar.” She turned her forearm up to show him. He examined it for a moment and then kissed the spot. 

“It’s not that bad,” he told her. 

“Gross. We haven’t even eaten yet and I’m already gonna barf,” Justin complained as he came to take a seat at the table. 

“What’s the matter with you, baby?” Qiao asked and sat beside him. 

“He’s just grumpy because he hasn’t eaten yet today,” Quanzhe told her, coming to sit opposite her as Zeren took the seat beside her. 

“Well, not for much longer. I’ve got all your favorites,” she smiled and held out a bowl of fish balls in front of him. He reached out and grabbed a couple with his hands and tossed them carelessly into the pot that was just starting to simmer. “Hey! Can you just wait a minute for your brothers?” 

“No,” he said gruffly. 

“Ugh. Don’t be rude, Minghao,” she scolded. Justin got up and walked around the table to sit next to Quanzhe. His behavior was so unexpected it brought tears to her eyes. 

They didn’t fall, but they did glass her eyes a little. “Did I do something?” she whispered to Zeren, whose brow furrowed. He turned to look at the youngest member like he was going to say something to him, but she put a hand on his thigh to stop him. “Don’t worry about it now. I’ll figure it out later.” She knew that calling him out wasn’t going to make anything better. 

“I got wine,” Zhengting announced, arriving at the table with two bottles. 

“Wow, really Ting?” Qiao smiled, delighted. 

Her brother shrugged. “I think it’s a special occasion. It’s been a while since we’ve had dinner like this. Plus, we all have the day off tomorrow and Du Mama gave me strict orders to keep everyone at home to rest, so I think we can have a little. I’ll even let Quanzhe and Minghao have some, if they want.”

“I’ll get glasses,” Qiao said and started to get up before Zeren put a hand on her shoulder. 

“You’ve done enough. Just relax.” He kissed her cheek and headed for the kitchen, returning with eight glasses with the help of Chengcheng and Wenjun. 

“Don’t be shy,” she told them when all seven brothers had taken their seats. Justin scooped his fish balls out of the broth right away and began eating. They were all abnormally quiet and subdued. “Did something happen today?” she asked, feeling that something was off. 

“No, we’re just tired,” Xinchun told her from the seat where Justin used to be. “We’ve been going non-stop. Like Zhengting said we have tomorrow off, so we’ve all finally turned off. We’ll be fine. This is just rest mode.”

“Oh,” she mouthed. Her heart ached for them, even though she knew they were enjoying their success and liked their work, she still wished they had more rest on a regular basis. She couldn’t help noticing the dark circles around each of their eyes.

“We’ll be fine after we eat,” Wenjun told her as he began to take food out of the pot. 

“I’m going to go straight from tired and hungry to stuffed and passed out,” Chengcheng smiled at her gratefully. 

As they began to eat they did perk up a bit, though she could still see that they were tired. They laughed and talked, telling stories about things that had happened on their various sets of the past month or so. They talked about stuff they could only talk about privately at home and not while working. Around the table they were able to fully relax with each other. Zhengting pulled his chair beside Wenjun and leaned his head against the taller man’s shoulder. Zeren draped his arm over the back of Qiao’s chair and played idly with her hair. No one made fun of Quanzhe. They complimented Zeren’s performance on Masked Dancing King and said they looked forward to Quanzhe’s appearance. They had all quietly been keeping up with each other the best they could. Qiao enjoyed being a relatively quiet spectator to their conversation, although of course she’d been keeping up with all of them, too. 

“Are you really having a perfect summer, Xinchun?” she asked, grinning at her own joke. 

“It’s actually a lot of fun. It’s been crazy busy, but fun,” he smiled. “Oh, I’ve been meaning to ask you why Wenhan is obsessed with you,” he laughed. 

“Is he?” Qiao and Zeren asked in unison. Her tone was amused while he was alarmed. 

Xinchun shrugged. “He asks about you kind of a weird amount.”

Qiao looked at Zeren and patted his leg under the table. “I guess for him I’m the one who got away,” she laughed and shrugged. 

“I seem to recall you saying it was a ‘brief flirtation,’” Zeren responded. 

“It was for me! I guess not so much for him.” Qiao tried to ignore Zeren’s jealous stare by fishing around in the remains of the pot.

“Your cast is gone!” Zhengting yelled when he finally noticed. 

“Yep,” she smiled. “All healed, except this ugly scar. I guess there goes my modeling career,” she quipped. 

“No, they’ll just photoshop it out,” Chengcheng told her before slurping up noodles. 

“Well, I was joking. Luckily I won’t have to find out.”

“You turned down the offers?” Xinchun asked. 

“What offers?”

“We heard that magazines have been reaching out to Du mama about more modeling jobs for you. Your cover comes out this week, doesn’t it?” Chengcheng asked. 

“Does it? Anyway, I haven’t heard anything about any other jobs, but Du mama probably turned them down because she knew I wouldn’t want to.” Qiao picked up her glass and took a sip of wine, but the silence of the boys felt suspicious. 

Zhengting cleared his throat. “You’re meeting Du mama tomorrow to talk about it.”

“That’s what tomorrow’s meeting is about?” she asked her brother, then turned to Zeren. “Did you know about this?”

“I just heard about it earlier today,” Zeren promised her. 

“She talked to me about it today because she wants me to help convince you,” Zhengting admitted. 

“But, I’m not a model,” Qiao protested. 

Chengcheng took his wine glass and leaned back in his chair in a move that almost looked sophisticated. “From what I heard you’re going to be very pleased with the photos they took of you. And apparently the photographer has said really good things about you.” 

“Ugh. But why?” Qiao groaned. 

“Relax, babe. Modeling can be really lucrative, and you may be really good at it,” Zeren tried to sooth her. 

“But I can’t be. Next they’re going to want me to act.”

“You can, but let’s move on for a little bit,” Zhengting suggested. “Let’s talk music. I heard you have a new song with Quanzhe.”

“Well, I just finished it this week. I haven’t recorded it all yet because I’m expecting some new equipment to play with in a few days. But I can play it after dinner if you want,” Qiao said, smiling at Quanzhe. 

“No!” Justin interrupted. 

“What, Minghao?” 

“How come you’ve written a song with every member but me?” he demanded to know.

“Is that why you’re so mad at me?” she wondered. 

“Yes. Everyone has a song but me.” He actually pouted. 

“That’s not true. Me and Ting don’t have songs either, and we’re her favorites,” Wenjun told him calmly. 

“Chengcheng has a song, Zeren has two songs, even Quanzhe and Xinchun have songs. It’s bullshit,” Justin complained. 

“Minghao, it’s only because you haven’t been around. You’ve been busy practically the whole time I’ve been here. But we can make time. We can start tomorrow,” Qiao assured him. 

“So you’re saying that if I were less successful you would be able to write a song with me? Or would it help if I were sleeping with you?”

“Minghao!” everyone yelled at once, all rising to their feet. 

“She already told you she’d work on one with you. Don’t be rude,” Quanzhe said before Zeren could say something worse. 

“Apologize,” Zeren said, not loudly but firmly. 

“Whatever,” Justin muttered and stormed off to his room. The didi line watched him go, while the geges trained their eyes on her. She flipped the chopsticks on her plate and walked away from the table back to her room. Zeren merely shook his head and followed her. 

In their room she laid down on the bed and pulled a pillow close to her chest. Zeren sat beside her and stroked her hair gently. 

“Minghao is just being a brat. Don’t pay attention to him,” he told her quietly. “He thinks he’s better than the rest of us because he’s the most famous and the most in demand. The fact that you haven’t worked with him has wounded his image of himself as the number one. But you haven’t done anything wrong.”

“I’m so tired of people questioning my motives. Either I got this job because I’m Zhengting’s sister, or I’m only writing songs because I’m your girlfriend. I’m an artist goddamnit. I demand to be treated like one. And if that little brat thinks I’m writing a song with him now then he can forget about it.” Qiao wiped a tear off her cheek. 

Zeren laid down beside her and wrapped his arms around her. “You will be, baby. Don’t worry. When people talk to me about our single, they speak of you with the utmost respect. They ask when our next single will be out. People recognize you for what you’ve done.” He planted a kiss on the back of her head. 

“People talk to you about our single?” she asked quietly. 

“Yeah, all the time.”

“How come you never tell me?”

“Oh, I don’t know. I’ll remember to tell you next time,” he promised and squeezed her. 

“Do you think Justin is going to be mad at me forever?” she asked after a quiet minute. 

Zeren could only laugh. “You’re not even mad at him are you?”

“No, I am. He was a jerk. But you know I can’t stand it when people are mad at me.”

“Don’t worry. He’ll get over it,” he assured her. “But you should wait for him to come back with his apology and not let him off easy.” Zeren wasn’t as forgiving as he knew she was. 

“Okay,” she agreed and let herself lay in his arms for a few minutes. “You said there would be more presents,” she said finally. She wasn’t much concerned about the present, but she wanted to see how happy he would be giving them to her. 

“Oh, yeah. It’s just one other thing, because I thought you might be mad at me if I went overboard,” he admitted as he handed her the Balenciaga bag. 

She reached inside and pulled out a soft cotton hoodie. “Aw, thank you,” she smiled. 

“It’s actually for me, cause I know you’d rather steal it from me than have your own,” he grinned. 

“You thought of everything,” she laughed. “Okay, my turn.” She reached under the bed and pulled out a large Givenchy bag.

He eyed her suspiciously because he had been scrolling through their site while the couple laid in bed the other morning. He pulled out the backpack he had saved to his shopping cart. “Thank you,” He said. “It’s just what I wanted.”

“I’m glad. I’m not as good at this whole gift giving thing, but I do have something else for you.”

“What?” He watched her with great anticipation as she got off the bed and grabbed his guitar from its resting place. She played him a short little song to list all her favorite things about him, from his dimples to his abs to his endless support of her. He tried to hide the watering of his eyes. She kissed his dimple and whispered “I love you,” in his ear when she was finished. Before she could pull all the way back from him he caught her face in his hands and held her for a kiss, and then several more. Just as she was about to move the guitar so they could be closer there was a knock on the door. Zeren gave her one more quick peck before he replied to the knock with a short “yeah?”

“It’s Quanzhe,” the boy said simply. 

“Come in.”

“Jiejie, gege, I was wondering if we could still hear the song?” the boy asked quietly. He’d just returned from his filming and he hadn’t had a chance to hear it yet. 

“Sure. Of course,” she smiled. She set the guitar back in it’s spot and walked out. She was surprised to find most of the other brothers in the hallway waiting. Everyone but Justin. She let it go and went to the studio with the guys falling in behind her. “You want me to sing it?” she asked Quanzhe and he nodded enthusiastically. “Okay, just remember that Quanzhe wrote the lyrics. I just made the music.” She took a deep breath and began to play. 

“Wow, jiejie, thank you!” Quanzhe crashed into her with a hug when she finished. 

“It will be even better when it has all the bells and whistles,” she promised. 

“Wow, Quanzhe, you wrote that?” Zhengting asked with admiration. Quanzhe blushed and nodded sheepishly. “I didn’t know you were such a good writer.”

“He is,” Qiao said proudly, ruffling his hair. 

“You guys, stop,” he begged, hiding his face in her shoulder. 

“Are you happy?” she asked. 

Quanzhe nodded. Then he lifted his head to look at her. “I don’t blame Justin for being jealous. But he’ll come around,” he assured her. She nodded sadly. 

“Okay, if there’s nothing else, then everyone should go rest,” Zhengting said, shooing the boys out of the room. Zeren waited for Qiao, but when he saw how her brother was looking at her he went ahead on his own and gave them a moment. Zhengting brushed his sister’s chin with his finger. “You’re doing a really great job,” he told her.

“Pfft,” she replied. 

“You are! I know things feel as slow for you as they feel fast for me, but things are going really well. Trust me. Du Hua is really impressed and pleased with you.”

“Are you really going to try to talk me into modeling?” she groaned. 

“I’m gonna try.” He pulled her gently to sit on the piano bench with him. “Why don’t you think you’d be good at it?” he asked gently

“I don’t know. I don’t like having my picture taken. And it’s not as easy as it looks. I don’t know what I’m doing!”

“You know, they can train you for that. We all took classes, Qiao.”

“Train?” she scoffed. “Wait. No. Don’t tell me. She doesn’t just want me to model does she? She wants me to be a trainee?” 

“It’s a possibility.”

She jumped off the bench. “No, it’s not!” she nearly yelled. “I’m not doing it. I’m too old.”

Zhengting shrugged “If Du Hua says you can do it, you can.”

“Why me?” she whined. 

“Why not you? Look, Yuehua is a talent management company. They manage talent, and you are talented. You can do this,” he tried to persuade her.

“I don’t want to, Zhengting. I really don’t want to.” She was on the verge of tears again. 

“Shh,” Zhengting soothed, brushing back her hair. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. No one is going to make you. I just wanted to give you a heads up so you aren’t surprised when you talk to her.”

“Zhengting,” she whined again. 

He hushed her once more. “It’s okay. Go to bed. Try not to think too much about it for now.” He kissed his sister on the cheek and sent her off. 

She trudged miserably down the hallway. She went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face before going to face Zeren. 

“Do you know about what they want to make me do?” she asked Zeren after shutting their door. 

“No one is going to make you do anything,” Zeren assured her. He patted the bed on the space in front of him where he was waiting with her hairbrush. “It’s just an option they want to present to you.”

She was surprised how diplomatically he was taking it. “Don’t you think this is just a way to break us up?”

He cocked his head at her in surprise. He hadn’t actually considered that angle. “I don’t think so, but now that you mention it, if you’re a trainee you probably can’t date. But I’ve never seen them have a trainee as old as--” he stopped himself. 

“It’s okay. I’m obviously way too old to be a trainee. That’s why I can’t see any other reason for this,” she admitted, sitting down tiredly on the bed in front of him. 

“Really? You can’t see any other reason? You can’t see that you’re talented and beautiful?” He began to slowly and gently brush her long hair. 

She rolled her eyes. “I don’t want to be like you guys.”

“Then you just tell them no,” he shrugged. 

“I’m not good at that.”

“I can go with you if you want,” he offered. 

She sighed. “No. That might just make things worse.” She turned to look at him. “I’d like to know what you think.”

He pursed his lips. “I don’t want to influence your decision. You should do it if you want to or not do it if you don’t want to.”

Qiao took his hand and held it tightly. “You told me a few weeks ago that you couldn’t imagine your future without me. You should know I feel the same way. I don’t want to make a huge decision for my future without knowing what you think. I’m not saying I’ll agree with whatever you say, but I do want to know your opinion.”

He thought for a moment. “How about this? Go to your meeting tomorrow and whatever she offers you, tell her you need a few days to think about it. She should give you at least one night. Don’t be pressured by her to give an answer right away. When you come home, we can talk about it, and I will give you my honest opinion, okay?”

Qiao frowned, but his plan sounded reasonable, so she agreed.


	27. Chapter 27

When she woke up for her meeting the next morning Zeren offered once more to go with her, but she told him to go back to sleep before planting a kiss on his forehead and going to get ready. When she left a little after nine o’clock Xinchun was the only one awake, driven out of his room by Chengcheng’s snoring. He waved a silent goodbye to her before she walked out the door. Her heart thumped as she sat in the familiar reception area. This time she was shown to the boardroom rather than Du Hua’s personal office, and two other executives were there. She figured that was meant to intimidate and persuade her. 

“Here is your cover,” Du Hua said when she entered the office. She slid a copy of the magazine in front of the girl. “It comes out tomorrow, but you can take this copy with you.”

Qiao examined the photo for a moment. She hardly recognized herself. She almost looked alluring. “Thank you,” Qiao responded quietly without opening to the article. She would save that for later. 

“The photographer was very impressed with you, especially considering it was your first time. He suggested to me it might be something you would be good at, with a little coaching,” Du Hua continued.

Qiao remained quiet. She thought about what Zeren said about not giving an answer right away and she didn’t want to start out this meeting with vehement disagreement. She merely nodded her head and waited for more information.

“I keep thinking,” Du Hua went on, “what a shame it was that we didn’t discover you when we discovered your brother, or Wenjun. You were right there the whole time.”

“I didn’t want to be discovered,” the young woman told her.

“Well, in any case, it isn’t entirely too late now.” The boss leaned forward and folded her hands on the table. “Qiao, I would like to have a serious discussion with you about expanding your role here at Yuehua and growing your talents.”

Qiao took a deep breath and was grateful that her brother had given her a heads-up so she wouldn’t freak out. “What exactly does that mean?”

“We would like to sign you as a trainee. We would train you to perform, model, act. We already know that you can sing, and we have heard you have experience dancing. We could hone those skills. After some training I think you could be a good leader for a group of girls one day. We’ve already had many requests for you as a model.” Du Hua laid out a virtual buffet of directions in which to develop her talents. Qiao tried hard not to scoff, but Du Hua could sense her hesitation. “We have prepared a two year contract. We would fly you to South Korea to train with our best teachers there.”

Qiao couldn’t contain her doubts any longer. “In two years I will be 26 years old. Doesn’t it seem a bit ridiculous to send me to train with 14 year old girls?”

“It’s a bit unconventional, I admit, but it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. There’s no guarantee you would go into a girl group. We could see how you are as an actress, a model, or even a solo performer,” the older woman suggested. 

“I’m not a performer. I’m an artist. A writer. Didn’t you bring me here to write and produce songs?” Qiao challenged. She felt her blood pressure rising. 

“Yes, that was our initial intention. And you’ve written some very good pieces for us. However, we don’t think that our original plan is going to work out. Under this new direction you could have the opportunity to write, record, and perform your own work,” one of the men beside Du Hua said, speaking for the first time. 

“Wait a minute. What do you mean the original plan isn’t going to work out?” Qiao looked at them in confusion. They had four, almost five songs. At the rate she was going they could have enough for a full album by October. 

“The boys are going to have a busy summer and fall, and probably winter as well. At the current rate, they’re not likely to have time for a tour until next spring or summer, and what good is putting an album out without a tour, even if we could get them into the studio to work?” the other man said. 

Qiao sat back in her chair and huffed a small laugh. “So you’ve over booked your band for non-musical activities and now you want to make me like them.”

“The current plan is to release the song you wrote with Chengcheng as another single and then put the album on hold.”

“For how long?” Qiao demanded to know, still trying to hold her composure but barely managing. 

“Indefinitely,” Du Hua said with a tone that suggested Qiao was close to getting out of line. 

“Is this supposed to be my consolation prize for you taking away my ability to make money?” she continued, not heeding the warning. 

“We’re offering you a new option.”

“I’m a songwriter, and you’re planning to take that away from me for two years while you figure out how else you can make money off of me? I agreed to write for you exclusively for a year. I’ve given you seven songs in that amount of time.” She wasn’t exactly sure what her point was, but she felt she was being treated unfairly. 

“This new deal could be much more lucrative for you in the long run,” one of the men told her. 

Well, yeah, she thought, since she wasn’t getting what she should under the current situation. “Is this all because of Zeren?” she couldn’t stop herself from asking. 

“What do you mean?” Du Hua asked, her eyes narrowing almost imperceptibly. 

“Trainees can’t date, right? Seoul is far enough to keep me away from him, right?” She tried to mentally fight back the tears that thought brought to her eyes. 

“Typically, for our younger trainees that is part of the deal. It’s meant to help them focus on their goals. But you’re clearly a grown woman, and I wouldn’t try to take away that freedom from you. There’s nothing in this contract that says if or whom you can date.” The boss motioned with her hand and one of the gentlemen walked over to place a contract in front of Qiao. 

The contract sat next to the magazine. Qiao stared at them side by side and tapped her fingers on the document. She took a deep breath and remembered Zeren’s words. “This is a lot to take in. I’d like to have a few days to think about it,” she said, making her voice calm with considerable effort. 

“Of course. Take the weekend. Feel free to have a lawyer look at it and come back to see us on Monday,” Du Hua suggested. Qiao nodded and stood to go. She stacked the contract on top of the magazine and picked them both up a little reluctantly. “Just know, Zhengqiao, that I think you could do a lot more than you’re doing now,” Du Hua said before the young woman left. 

Qiao tried not to roll her eyes at how she thought they could make a lot more money off of her than they were doing now. She confirmed an appointment with the secretary before she left and then got a car home. 

When she arrived at the apartment all the brothers except Justin were sitting in the living room watching a movie. She tossed the magazine and the contract on the coffee table where several of them were resting their feet. They landed with a thud and the contract slid off the glossy cover. 

“How did it go?” Zeren asked immediately as Zhengting went in for the magazine.

“Meimei, you look stunning!” Zhengting smiled, even at her scarred up face. “Not that I’m surprised,” he smiled to himself and Wenjun looked approvingly over his shoulder. Zhengting began to flip through looking for her article. 

“Did you know they’re putting off the album indefinitely?” she demanded fiercely, not at all distracted by Zhengting’s compliments. Everyone went silent as they looked at each other or the wall, anywhere but her. “Seriously?”

“We were told yesterday,” Chengcheng confessed. “We were told specifically to let her break the news.”

“Fucking traitors,” she spat in their direction and stormed off to her room as tears began to fall. The members looked at each other again until she slammed the door and they all jumped. 

“I’m on it,” Zeren assured her brother, who looked at him worriedly. He wasn’t at all surprised to find she had locked the door. “Qiao let me in,” he pleaded, jiggling the handle. 

“Go away, Zeren,” she cried back. 

“Come on, baby. Let’s talk about it.”

“I’m not ready to talk to you,” she said more quietly from just the other side of the door. He saw the lights go dark from the crack around the door and resigned to give her some time alone. He dragged himself back to the others. 

“How is she?” Quanzhe asked from the spot Zeren had left so he could look at the pictures with Zhengting. 

Zeren sat on the arm of the couch beside him and shook his head. “I think she needs a little time.”

“Her pictures are really good. When she called us to say she was doing a photoshoot I was a bit skeptical, but these came out well,” Zhengting commented, flipping through the couple of pages to examine each photo. 

“Let’s read the article and give her a little time,” Xinchun suggested. Zhengting handed the magazine over to him, since he was the best reader, and Xinchun read it aloud to everyone. They were touched by her responses to working with them and surprised she’d almost managed to not talk about Zeren at all. When he finished reading Zeren asked for the magazine and to speak to Zhengting in private.

Zhengting looked briefly at Wenjun with worried eyes before he followed the younger man out onto the terrace. Zeren sat in one of the seldom used chairs and waited for his leader.

“What’s up?” Zhengting asked, the worry still evident in his expression. 

Zeren rubbed a hand over his mouth as he thought over his words. “I know that as our leader you’ve taken on the role of liaison between Du mama and the rest of us members, but your sister isn’t one of us. It can’t be your job to convince her to do what Du mama wants, especially when it’s something we all know she doesn’t want for herself.” Zhengting didn’t seem to have a response to that, so Zeren continued. “I hate to say this, but your sister is impressionable, and what you say matters to her. She’s twisted herself up in knots thinking that because you think she should do it and Du Hua wants it that she has to do it. I know that’s foolish, but you should know how she thinks better than anyone.”

Zhengting nodded his head. “You’re right. I know that. I guess I just thought that things worked out for me, and so they would work out for her. But after listening to her interview, I know I was wrong. I guess I forgot how different we really are,” Zhengting explained. “I forgot my dreams aren’t her dreams at all. And I’m really glad you’re someone she has to keep her on her path.”

Zeren took a moment to examine her pictures and smiled. “Hey, Ting-ge,” Zeren said, breaking the silence. 

“Yeah?”

“Your sister is prettier than you,” he said simply. 

“Yeah, right. She wishes,” Zhengting quipped before he got up to go inside. 

Zeren went back to the bedroom and knocked on the door again. “Qiao, please talk to me,” he begged quietly. It took a moment but he heard movement and eventually the door unlocked, but didn’t open. He opened it slowly and turned on the lights. He found her sitting on the bed with her knees to her chin and tears streaming down her cheeks. 

“Baby, I’m so sorry,” he began. 

“How could you not tell me?” She managed to sound angry, even through her sobs.

“We made a promise,” he said, approaching her slowly. 

“Stay away from me. I could just hit all of you right now,” she barked. 

“Qiao, it’s business.”

“Yeah, it’s my business!” she cried. “I worked so hard, Zeren,” she sniffed. “I worked so hard on each of those songs. And now she has them hostage. They’re my livelihood. They’re my art. They’re mine.”

“I thought they were ours,” Zeren said quietly, though he sensed he was stepping in the wrong direction. 

“They would have been! I wanted them to be. But there is no ‘yours’! She doesn’t see you being a steady working band until the summer of _next year...mayve_. That would be if you could ever get to the studio because you’re so busy working on everything else. She wants to send me to South Korea for _two years!_ And she can say whatever she wants, but I know it would make her happy if it tore us apart.” Qiao made no effort to wipe away her angry tears. She just let them fall down in rivers, so Zeren sat next to her and put the magazine still clutched in his hand aside so he could do it for her. 

“I don’t know what I can do about the rest of it, but the only thing I will ever let tear us apart is you. Even if you go to Seoul for two years. Even if you go to the moon,” he promised her, holding her face in his hands. 

“Zeren, I don’t want what you guys have. I want what I was promised before.” Her voice was much softer and more desperate now. 

“Do you want to hear my opinion now?” he offered, still cupping her face in his hands. She sniffed and nodded her head. She’d stopped crying now. “I don’t think you should do it.”

“Why not?” she wondered, although she could think of a million reasons of her own. 

Zeren released her to grab a tissue and then sat on the bed beside her. “Because I think you’d be miserable,” he admitted. “When I was a trainee, I was only a teenager. It was something I wanted more than anything else. It was a dream come true for me to be able to dance and learn other skills for hours a day. Even when I was dead tired and I missed my family, I didn’t regret it. Even now, I still think it was worth it.”

“Okay, so why shouldn’t I do it?” she sniffed.

“Because you don’t want to. Zhengting can try to tell you how you’d be good at it. Du mama can try to tempt you with promises of money and success. But if it isn’t the dream that you want when you close your eyes at night, then it will only fill your days with misery. And well, that’s just stupid.” He half smiled at his ineloquent ending.

“You’re right,” she nodded. “I’ve been thinking about how much I don’t want the end result, but I didn’t even think about how the process itself would ruin me.” She laughed a little and leaned over to rest her head on his shoulder. 

“You’re so silly sometimes,” he told her with a shake of his head. 

“What do you mean?”

“I just read your article. It’s amazing how forgetful you are,” he smiled. 

“What did I say?” she wondered. 

Zeren grabbed the magazine from his side and cleared his throat so he could quote it to her. “Believe in your intention and don’t let others try to take you in a different direction. That’s hard for me--to stay focused--but it’s important to know what you want. Surround yourself with people who will help you stay true to yourself, who keep you focused and who encourage you.” He put the magazine back down and looked at her with amusement. “You’ve been upset about this since the idea was presented last night. You’ve always known what you wanted but you let the fact that some other people thought it was what you _should_ do get you upset. I guess I just don’t understand why you wouldn’t say, “No, that’s not what I want,” and let everyone else just suck it up.”

“Well, I tried! I don’t know how many times I’ve said I don’t want to perform, I don’t want to model. But people kept pushing and pushing. I guess, sometimes I just feel like I have to do what other people expect of me.” Qiao pulled herself away from him and stared at her fingernails. “I know, it’s a character flaw. I’m nothing if not painfully aware of my own flaws.” She smiled a little, maybe just for his benefit. “But don’t you see, that’s why I have you?”

“And if you didn’t have me?” he wondered. 

She snuggled close to him. “I don’t want to consider that even as a hypothetical.”

He grinned and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “You’re right. Never gonna happen.” He sighed. “I just want you to make the choices that make you happy. I’m sure your brother’s heart is in the right place, but it’s not his life that’s affected by the choice. I think Du mama made him feel like it was his duty to convince you, and so he tried. I’m not sure he really thought about it.”

Qiao nodded and they sat in silence for a moment. “I’m still mad at you for not telling me about the album.”

He sighed heavily. “I know. I should have said something last night, but you were already frustrated about the other thing and I didn’t want to pile onto it. I’m sorry.”

She turned her head to look up at him and he looked back. “You have to be my ally,” she insisted. “It’s you and me until the end, no matter what, right?”

He squeezed her a little tighter. “Yes, I promise.”

“Ze?” she said after a quiet moment.

“Yeah, babe?”

“I’m sad,” she admitted. 

“I know, babe. I wish I could make it better.”

Qiao allowed herself to fall over into his lap, and he gently stroked her hair until she fell asleep. 

That night they ordered pizza and watched a scary movie. Justin spent most of the day catching up on much needed sleep, but Quanzhe had lectured him for a solid half hour about how he talked to Qiao and he had a lot of time to think about that as well. 

“Qiao-jie, can I talk to you?” Justin asked when he finally emerged to the living room. All seven of them turned to look at him and then at her. She nodded and left the warmth of Zeren’s arms to follow him down the hall to the studio. He sat cross-legged on the floor and waited for her to sit with him. “I’m sorry for how I spoke to you yesterday,” he said after she said nothing, waiting for him to go first. “I know I crossed the line.”

“I don’t think I was the only one you hurt with your words yesterday,” she told him. Zeren hadn’t said anything but she knew he was wounded at being labeled less successful, and probably Quanzhe, too. 

“I know. I just don’t like feeling like I’m on the outside of everyone else. I feel like I’m missing out on stuff the rest of the group is experiencing.”

She scoffed, though not really at him. “I’m not even sure there is a group anymore.”

“I know. I keep getting jobs, and I’m just wondering when I’ll be able to work with everyone again,” he admitted.

“Minghao.” She didn’t really know what to say to him, but she felt for him. 

“I still want to write a song with you, if you can forgive me.”

“I forgive you. But you know there’s no album anymore.”

“I know, but we could work out a solo maybe?”

“Ugh. To be honest, I don’t know when I’m going to feel like writing again. I’m really depressed about this whole thing right now. I’ve done so much for nothing. I just don’t think I can right now,” she told him apologetically. 

“I get that. I’m sorry.”

“Thanks for understanding.” She tried to smile, but it didn’t really come out. 

“Are you going to take the contract Du mama offered?” Justin wondered. She shook her head. “That’s good.”

“Why?”

“I don’t think you have what it takes,” he smiled. 

“Thanks, Minghao,” she said rolling her eyes. 

“You’re too sensitive for it. And lazy.”

“Okay, Minghao. I get it.”

“I’m just teasing.” They both sighed. “When you feel like writing again, will you let me know?” he asked, standing and then holding out a hand to help her up. . 

“Sure,” she agreed and they went out to watch the movie with the others. 

\----

Qiao skimmed the contract just to see what it entailed. There was nothing in it that she found remotely motivating. It was essentially an agreement to give up her time with no promise of anything for the future. Zeren offered to contact his brother, who was a lawyer and had helped with his contracts, but she refused as she felt it was unnecessary. She returned to Yuehua on Monday afternoon sure of her decision. 

“I’m sure this is a generous offer for someone who wants it, but I’m not interested,” she told Du mama when they were alone in her office. 

Du Hua smiled. “I’m glad.”

Qiao furrowed her eyebrows. “What? You are?”

“It was a test,” the older woman confessed. Qiao’s eyes widened in surprise and Du Hua almost laughed. “I was impressed by what you said to the reporter in that article. And although I don’t actually want you as a trainee, I do believe in your talent, Zhengqiao. I want you to have a long career in this industry. But I think you’re soft-hearted, and I wanted to see if you could do what you said in the interview and stand by your own desires. I’m glad you didn’t disappoint me.”

Qiao grinned. “What would you have done if I’d said yes?” she wondered. 

“It was a legitimate offer. We still would have taken you,” she shrugged. 

“And the album?” Qiao asked hopefully. 

“Unfortunately that part is true,” Du Hua admitted. “We thought about perhaps releasing an EP, but it just doesn’t fit the schedule for now. Maybe next year.”

Qiao’s momentary pleasure dissipated. “And my songs?”

“You are of course always welcome to submit new songs to us. We can consider them for other projects, as we’ve done in the past. More songs for the girls perhaps.” Qiao tried to hide her disappointment, but she didn’t pull it off. “There are still modeling opportunities for you, if you’re interested. I’m willing to let you work with one of our coaches in Seoul for a few weeks, if you’re interested. No contract necessary. It won’t be like you’re a trainee or anything. It might not be a bad idea for you to think about learning to talk to the press, etc. I really do believe you have a future in this industry and this company.”

“Thanks,” Qiao said. “I’ll consider it. If there’s nothing else I’m going to go home and be depressed for a while.”

Du Hua smiled and shook her head at the young woman’s emotional frankness. “Artists,” she teased. “Don’t be too discouraged. It’s not a reflection on you. It’s just the way it is.”

Qiao nodded and saw herself out. She couldn’t help feeling a bit sour at the relationship now. She was glad she hadn’t brought up anything about Quanzhe’s song. Although she was still under contract she wasn’t interested in providing the company with any more of her work for the time being. 

“How did it go?” Quanzhe asked when she returned to the apartment. They were the only two left in town at the time. 

“I’ve been punked,” she told him as she dropped herself onto the couch beside him. 

“What?”

“It was all some stupid test or something. Which I guess I passed? But there’s still no album and I still feel shitty,” she pouted. 

“I’m sorry, jie.” He patted the top of her head. 

She sighed heavily. “What do you say to holding back on your song for a little bit. Maybe in a couple of months we can propose it as a birthday single for you. I don’t feel like your song deserves to be sitting around in their hands going nowhere.”

“Sounds good to me. It will just be a you and me thing,” he smiled. 

“Yeah,” she agreed, bumping fists with him.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiao visits her mom and meets Zeren's parents

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Zeren asked one day as he sat on the couch enjoying a lazy afternoon.

“Sometimes you just really take my breath away, you know? Even after all the time we’ve spent together sometimes you just walk into the room, and I just can’t breathe for a minute,” she admitted as she came to join him on the couch. 

“Then you should stop looking at me,” he said, covering her eyes with his hand. “I don’t want you to pass out.”

“But you could give me mouth to mouth,” she smiled, still blinded. 

“Yeah, or I could just kiss you.” And he did just that. 

“I have hundreds of pictures of you saved on my phone for when you’re gone and I’m sad,” she continued when he left her lips.

“Can I see?” he smirked.

“No!” she snapped.

“Why not? They’re my pictures,” he argued. 

“Then you should know what they look like.”

“Which ones do you have? Why do you have them saved instead of just looking at them on the internet?” he wondered. 

“Because these ones are my favorites.”

“Let me see. I want to know which versions of me are your favorites.” He began to slowly tease her sides as if he were going to tickle her.

“Every version of you is my favorite,” she smiled. 

“Let me see!” he cried and began to tickle her in earnest, eliciting mad laughter from her until she begged for mercy. She laid in his lap for a moment while she settled down and caught her breath, and he went back to scrolling on his phone as if he’d done nothing at all. 

“Have you thought about doing a birthday single this year?” Qiao asked, abruptly changing the subject. 

Zeren fidgeted with the hair at the back of his head. He didn’t say a word.

“Ze?” she asked, sitting up to see his face. 

He met her eyes briefly before looking away again and sighing. “My agent called me this week. She said they found someone for me to work with, if I’m interested in doing a single this year.”

Qiao’s eyebrows lifted involuntarily. “Oh.” She understood. He meant--they meant--that they couldn’t do a song together. 

“I haven’t given them an answer yet,” he said quietly. 

Her brows descended again into a confused expression. “Why wouldn’t you do it?”

He was silent for a moment. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings.”

“Ze, you’re going to have to work with other writers. I’m not an idiot.” She rolled her eyes. “Tell them you’ll do it.”

He knew that she meant it, but he also knew it was hurting her more than she wanted it to. She picked up the magazine with her face on it that had become a permanent fixture of the coffee table and flipped to a random page. She wasn’t reading it. 

“It will be good for you. You can do something more your style,” she said a minute later. 

“What does that mean?” he wondered

“You know, something more EDM. My stuff is a little more poppy.”

“I like your style,” he argued

“I know, but it’s my style. Not yours.”

“I wish we could work together.” He ran his fingers slowly through her hair, tingling her scalp just a little.

“It’s your birthday single, Zeren, not mine. Don’t worry about it. I just…”

“What?”

“Part of me wishes we had made ‘Show you’ a solo for you. I feel like we won’t get to work together again.”

Zeren put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his side. He kissed the top of her head just as tears were starting to well in her eyes. She wouldn’t let them fall. 

“We will work together again, someday. They’ll ease up. Or maybe we’ll just rebel,” he grinned. 

She looked up at him to see his smile and stretched out to kiss the spot where a dimple had carved into his cheek. She wanted to see things work out the way he suggested, but she couldn’t help but doubt it. Even if the company would let them collaborate on a solo, it had been weeks since she’d written anything at all. She figured if she had the burden she’d just let him down anyway, but it didn't stop her from wishing.

Zeren noticed how quiet and pensive she got after talking about the company. He ran his fingers through her hair again, drawing her eyes back to his. “Baby, I’m going to be gone for most of next week. Maybe you should go visit your mom if you don’t feel like doing anything around here.” He hoped he was saying that as gently as he could. He was worried watching her mope around the apartment, even as she tried to hide her sadness from him. He couldn’t imagine what it must look like when he was gone. 

“What about Shadow?” she wondered, looking around for the creature. 

Zeren shrugged. “Quanzhe will be here most of the time. And she can be alone for a day by herself. You know we’re just her weird roommates anyway,” he chuckled. 

To his surprise Qiao agreed without any other hesitations. Her heart was still aching too much from the disappointment of ruined plans. She was growing tired of wasting away her days alone in the apartment, so she booked a flight for home. When her mother came to fetch her from the airport she jumped out of the car to hug her, unwilling to wait another hour for the drive home to hug the daughter she hadn’t seen in years.

“Are you okay? How was your flight?” mom asked as they pulled away from the airport. 

“It was fine. I’m okay,” Qiao told her a little unconvincingly. 

“How’s your brother?” she wondered, and Qiao smiled ironically at how short a time it took for her to ask about Ting. 

“He’s well. I saw him last week. He’s shooting a drama in Chongqing with Wenjun,” Qiao revealed.

“Chongqing? I thought he was in Beijing with you,” mom said, confirming Qiao’s suspicions that her brother had lied to their mother. 

“No. He’s been in Chongqing for a couple of months now.”

“You’ve been in Beijing with all those boys?” She sounded shocked. 

“Well, actually I’m alone most of the time,” Qiao admitted sadly. 

“You should have come home sooner, little girl.” Her mother patted her knee. 

“I know.”

“Two years is too long. But it’s still not as bad as your brother,” she admitted.

“I know. I guess, I was afraid of coming home without achieving anything. I didn’t want to come home until I could prove that making music was something I could do. And I can. I’ve made a hit song, mama.” Qiao smiled for real. 

“I know. I’m very proud of you. But you didn’t have to worry about coming home. I’d rather have you home any way.” They both went quiet for a minute. “I know you kids have dreams, and I know I raised you to work hard. I just didn’t know that raising you that way was going to take you so far away from me.”

“I’m sorry, mama,” Qiao frowned. 

“Oh, nevermind. What matters is you came to see me now. But I have the feeling you came home because you need cheering up. What’s going on? Did someone break your heart?” the mother asked knowingly. 

Qiao laughed lightly. “Yeah, I’m a little broken hearted, but it wasn’t a guy.” She smiled a little knowing that Zeren would want to do anything to avoid breaking her heart. “You know I signed with Yuehua to work on a new album for NEXT. Things seemed to be going well but it fell through. Now, I just don’t know what to do with myself.”

“What do you mean? You keep writing,” her mother encouraged. 

“I just don’t have anything to give right now. I signed on to write for them exclusively, and I’m afraid anything I give them will just sit there. So I’m just going to hold back for a while.”

“Why don’t you renegotiate your contract?”

“I can’t do that,” Qiao said, shaking her head. 

“Of course you can, everything is negotiable,” her mother assured her. 

“You know I can’t negotiate. I’ve never once been able to negotiate my way out of anything with you.”

Her mother laughed. “That’s true. You’ve never been good at that. So you get a lawyer who can help you. You can afford that now,” she shrugged. 

“Yeah, maybe,” Qiao agreed, looking at her hands. “I may know someone,” she realized. “In any case, I’m here to spend some time with you now.”

“And I’m very happy. So are you ready to tell me about your boyfriend now?” her mom smiled.

“What makes you think I have a boyfriend?” Qiao asked, but she couldn’t hide her smile. 

“You’re my daughter. I know you and your brother think you are good at hiding things from me, and sometimes you are, but you’ve never been able to hide that. I can just sense it.” She smiled. “So, what’s he like? How did you meet?”

“He’s really sweet and hardworking. Handsome, cute. He’s a dancer. Um, actually, he’s a member of the band…”

“Of NEXT?” her mom asked in shock. 

“Mhm.”

“Which one?”

“Ding Zeren.” Qiao bit her lip.

“Is that the short one?”

“He’s not short!” Qiao laughed. 

“So you live with him?” mom asked disapprovingly. 

“Um, well, yeah. When he’s in town,” she admitted.

Her mom sighed. “Well, I don’t approve. But I guess you’re all adults. Does he treat you well?”

“He does. No one has ever treated me better. He’s very supportive and considerate. We work well together. Things are really great between us,” Qiao assured her. 

“Well, that’s good. Does he have enough time for you?” her mom wondered, knowing how important that was for her daughter.

“He does the best he can. It’s not easy, with their crazy schedules, but we make the most of it.” Qiao shrugged. 

“Is it worth all the trouble?” The mother peered at the daughter to gauge her expression. 

The daughter smiled contentedly. “With him, it’s worth every second. He’s my partner. Even if he can’t always be there, he’s always there for me.”

“Then I’m satisfied,” her mother smiled. “Later you have to show me his picture so I can remember,” she said, making her daughter laugh. 

“Hey, buddy!” Qiao cried, greeting her old dog when she entered her childhood home. “Do you remember me?” The dog sniffed her all over and nuzzled into her pets. She took her luggage down to her old room to find it empty. 

“I put clean sheets on your bed this morning,” her mother said, coming in behind her. 

“Where’s all my stuff?” Qiao wondered. 

“I boxed up your and Ting’s stuff and put it in the garage. It just made me sad,” she said quietly. Qiao turned to hug her mother, if only to hide the tears the comment brought to her eyes. 

“I’m sorry,” Qiao whispered. 

“It’s okay, honey. You’re grown up now. I know I can’t keep you here.” She hugged the girl tightly. 

“Can I look through some of my old stuff?” Qiao asked when she was ready to let her mother go. 

“Of course. It’s all in the garage. Take anything you want. I’m going to go make dinner.”

“I’ll help you,” Qiao smiled and followed her to the kitchen. 

Qiao spent some time in the following days going through old things in her room. She found her old CD player and CDs. She sat on the floor and remembered laying there listening to music with her twin and listening to his dreams about being famous while she thought about the songs she would write for him. She found some old journals of hers and read over old dreams she’d written down, both the sleeping and the waking ones. She found lyrics to songs she’d written when she was only a teenager, when she had her first tastes of love and heartache. She packed some of the journals in her luggage when she went back to Beijing.

“You’re sure there’s nothing I can do to help you?” Qiao asked on her last morning with her mom. 

“I’m fine. Your brother has taken care of some things, but for the most part you know I manage on my own. I don’t need anything from you,” her mother assured her.

“Ting’s not the only one who can help. If you need anything please let me know,” Qiao urged, taking her mother’s hand. 

“I will. Don’t worry about me.” The woman patted her daughter's hand gently and smiled. 

“Thank you for coming,” her mother said as she hugged her at the airport. 

“I’ll come again soon,” the girl promised. 

“Try to bring your brother some time,” her mother begged. 

“I’ll do my best,” she assured her before turning to return home. 

\----

Qiao woke up in the early morning to find Zeren by her side. She had a vague awareness of him coming home in the middle of the night, but she was in deep sleep then, and when he whispered for her to go back to sleep she did so easily. Now she was pleasantly surprised to see him sleeping peacefully a foot away from her in the dim morning light. She didn’t want to disturb him, but she couldn’t stop herself from scooting closer, to be able to touch him just a little after their separation. Carefully, she rested her cheek on his shoulder and felt content. After a little while he began to approach consciousness, murmuring a little incoherently. Sensing her presence, he lifted his arm to wrap it around her so she could come closer. In response, she wrapped her arm tightly around his torso, thrilled to have him nearer. He smiled sleepily as he laid soft kisses on his bare chest. His skin was warm and soft beneath her. 

“Good morning,” he mumbled happily. 

“I missed you,” she replied. She lifted up on her elbow so she could access more of his chest, more of his skin. 

“I missed you, too,” he admitted, feeling the pleasure of her lips on his collarbone, working their way slowly and gently to his neck. She kissed the hollow of his neck, below his ear, his sharp jaw, the corner of his mouth before he finally opened his eyes to see her loving expression. 

“I’m sorry I woke you. I know you need to sleep,” she apologized, and she really was sorry. “I simply can’t help myself.” 

“It’s worth it to see you,” he replied. He tightened his grip on her to pull her against his chest and bring her in for a kiss on the lips. With his other hand he brushed back the hair that fell onto his face but pulled her in even more for a deeper, more passionate kiss. His tongue slipped out to lick her bottom lip and coaxed her tongue out to meet it. He rolled them over to bring his weight half on top of her. His leg slipped between hers and he appreciated the softness of her whole body. He pulled back an inch just to say, “I wish I could wake up like this every morning,” before he kissed her again. For a long time they did nothing but kiss sweetly and enjoy the pleasure of having one’s lover in one’s hands.

“Do you have a schedule today?” she asked later as he rested his forehead against her shoulder and caressed her arm.

He shook his head slowly. “No. I was going to go see my parents.” He lifted his head to meet her eyes. “I know last time I brought it up was too soon, but it’s been a few months now, and your mom knows. Do you want to come with me to meet them?” he asked softly. 

Qiao chewed on her bottom lip. “Do they know about us?” Zeren shook his head. “Do you think they’ll like me?” she wondered. 

“Of course they will. You’re charming and delightful. Everyone likes you,” he smiled as he kissed her cheek. “So, what do you say?”

“Okay,” she agreed nervously. She always hated meeting parents. 

“I’ll let them know to set another place for dinner, but for now I just want to lay here with you,” he said, nuzzling into her neck and closing his eyes again.

They had to make a plan, of course. It wouldn’t be as simple as Zeren driving her out to the suburbs, holding her hand over the center console to reassure her and tell her how great she looked. He was going to leave the apartment first, driving himself, since that was one of his favorite parts of going out to see them anyway. He could have some time to be in control of his own life, even if it was only for 30 minutes. Qiao would get a car to take her out to their house ten minutes after he left. That should be enough to not arouse any suspicion. Qiao spent the afternoon making her famous cookies. She said she wasn’t about to go to her in-laws house empty handed. 

So, they executed the plan accordingly, and Zeren arrived at his parents’ apartment first. He greeted Wangcai, and Simba. His parents were happy to see him. It’d been three weeks since he’d come home, and most of that time had been spent out of town working on various projects. 

“Who is this mysterious guest you’ve invited to dinner?” his mother wondered with a smile. 

“You’ll see when they get here,” he said coily, and distracted her by talking about his recent work while sitting on the couch with Wangcai.

Fifteen minutes after he’d arrived Qiao called him from the lobby to tell him she was there. He told her what floor to go to and went out to the hallway to meet her at the elevator. Located on one of the upper floors, she was surprised to find their apartment was quite large, and grander than the one the boys lived in. 

“You ready?” he asked, giving her hand a squeeze outside the door. She nodded and squeezed back, although she wasn’t ready at all. 

When the couple walked in the door his parents were hardly able to hide their shock. 

“Baba, mama, this is my girlfriend Zhu Zhengqiao,” he smiled, still holding her hand. 

She pulled away gently so that she could bow to them. “Mr. Ding, Mrs. Ding, it’s nice to meet you,” she said politely. “Um, I made these cookies for you,” she smiled uncertainly and extended them out to Mrs. Ding, whose expression was still stunned. 

“Thank you,” Mr. Ding said, since his wife didn’t seem able to speak yet. 

“Thank you for having me for dinner. You have a beautiful home,” Qiao complimented awkwardly. 

“Please, come in,” Mrs. Ding finally said, albeit a bit robotically. She took the gift from the poor girl’s hands.

“Can I help you with anything?” Qiao offered. 

“No, no, everything is ready. Please have a seat,” Mrs. Ding urged and went to the kitchen to take a deep breath.

Meanwhile, Mr. Ding led her to the dining room and invited her to have a seat at the place they had set opposite Zeren. The three sat awkwardly at the table waiting for Mrs. Ding to return. Zeren was surprised at the cool welcoming, while Qiao’s palms were sweating. Mrs. Ding entered the dining room a few minutes later with soup. She served everyone, who still remained quiet, before taking her own seat. 

Mr. Ding cleared his throat. “So, Zhengqiao, was it?” he asked. 

“Yes, sir, but you can just call me Qiao,” she smiled.

“Qiao,” he nodded. “I’m sorry, we’re a little surprised to meet you. When Zeren said to set another place for dinner we thought he was going to bring a friend, or someone famous,” he forced a laugh. “We didn’t expect a girlfriend,” he admitted. 

“Well, Qiao is on her way to being famous,” Zeren beamed while she gave him a look that said _you didn’t warn your parents?_

“Oh, really?” his mother chimed in.

“Qiao wrote the single,” Zeren explained. “She’s very popular right now,” he said, making her blush. 

“It was a team effort,” she said, embarrassed. “But I do write and produce songs,” she admitted. 

“Wow, so you two met through work?” Mrs. Ding asked. 

“Yes, well, Qiao is Zhengting’s twin sister,” Zeren told his mother. 

“Oh, an older woman?” his father laughed. Qiao blushed deeper. She thought her whole face would be red throughout dinner. “Did you go to school Qiao?” he asked to fill the awkward silence that had followed. 

“Yes, sir. I graduated from Shenyang conservatory two years ago, and then I worked as a recording musician for two years in Seoul.” She was relieved to have something to say she could be proud of. 

“What brought you to Beijing?” Mr. Ding asked as his wife disappeared into the kitchen to get the second course. She chugged a whole glass of wine while she was in there.

“I came to work on an album with NEXT,” she said, ignoring the pang that gave her heart.

“How long have you two been seeing each other?” Mrs. Ding asked when she sat back down.

“Um, what is it going on five months now?” Zeren said, counting back to May on his fingers. 

“Five months?” his mother choked. 

“Yes,” he answered. 

“And you’ve just now brought her here?” she asked, clearly bothered. 

“Well, we’ve been busy,” Zeren defended, looking to Qiao, but she was looking at her plate.

“Not too busy to date, apparently,” Mrs. Ding scoffed. 

“Well, mama, that’s special,” he shrugged, but his voice went quieter.

“I don’t approve,” she said bluntly. 

“Mama!” Zeren complained, knowing that Qiao wouldn’t look at him with the tears she must have had coming on. 

“I just can’t believe that after all the sacrifices you’ve made you would put your career at risk like this. You gave up your whole childhood to debut, and you’re willing to throw it away over a girl?” his mother asked, incredulous. 

“Mom, I’m not throwing anything away. We’re being careful. We have rules. We’ve made it this long,” he argued.

“You really think you can keep a secret like this? You brought her here. Is that being careful?” she asked in a sharp tone.

“Again, we’ve managed to keep it a secret for five months. I brought Qiao here because I love her, and I wanted you to know it. Yes, I know there’s a risk to this, but it’s worth it. You’re right. I’ve sacrificed a lot. I’ve never regretted it. Now you want me to sacrifice love, too? I won’t.” He shook his head firmly.

“You can’t do this, Zeren. You’re so young. What could you know of love?” his mother wondered.

Qiao wanted to run. She wanted to tell Zeren he should talk to his parents. He could sense her fear, and when she finally raised her head just barely to look at him he gave her a look she would only recognize as pleading. She gathered her courage and picked up her head to look at his mother. 

“I love Zeren. I would never let him jeopardize his career. I’ll support him in everything like he supports me.” She swallowed hard. “We care about each other and we help each other in our dreams. His future is safe with me, I promise.” Zeren’s mother looked between them in disbelief. 

Zeren's eyes widened sympathetically at Qiao and he never took them off her while he spoke. “That’s right. Qiao has already made my career more successful. I have a number 1 song because of her. I won’t let her go.” 

“If you throw everything away on her, you won’t just be wasting all the sacrifices you’ve made, but the ones your father and I have made, too. Let this go, Zeren,” his mother pleaded.

Zeren sighed and looked at the table. “Please don’t put me in this position, mama. I brought Qiao here because I wanted you to know that in spite of all the things I’ve given up, I’ve found someone who loves me. Don’t ask me to choose between being a good son and the woman I love.”

Neither of them spoke for a moment until Zeren’s father spoke up. “I don’t think there’s anything more to say for now,” he said. He could see things would only get worse and although he didn’t agree with his wife he wasn’t prepared to go against her. 

“I should leave,” Qiao said quietly and stood from her seat. 

Zeren stood and walked around the table to her. He took her hand and held it tightly. “Go back to the apartment and I’ll be there soon.”

Zeren’s father showed her out of the apartment with an apologetic smile. She went out a back entrance to the alley and then two blocks over before ordering a car to take her back home, just to be safe. She managed not to let herself cry in the backseat. Things had gone even worse than she had anticipated, and she felt several kinds of awful. She wondered if Zeren was really letting his parents down by being with her, and if so, did she have a responsibility to end things with him?

Back in his parents’ home, Zeren wiped his hand over his mouth and shook his head. “I really didn’t expect things would turn out like this,” he said sadly, looking at his mother with disappointment. “If I’d known you’d react like this, I wouldn’t have brought her here. I would’ve kept on with this secret, but as my parents I wanted you to know. Now I regret it.”

“Zeren, you shouldn’t have brought this on so suddenly. You should have warned us before she showed up at our door. You could have given your mother time to warm up to the idea,” his father said, shaking his head.  
“I think now it’s better if you leave and give her some time to think.”

“Baba.” Zeren said the word pleadingly.

“Go home. We’ll talk about it later,” his father replied. 

“You’re really going to let him go back to that girl?” his mother asked angrily. 

“It’s his life. He has to work it out,” her husband said steadily. 

“No. Zeren, stay,” his mom begged. “Will you never listen to your parents?”

Zeren sighed. “Mama, baba, I’m sorry to disappoint you. I never wanted to. I hope I’ll show you this isn’t a bad thing. I hope I can still make you proud.” 

And with that he turned and left their home, dejected. He drove quickly back to the city and arrived just a few minutes after Qiao. She was sitting in the living room chair, holding her knees to her chest, staring into space. 

“Qiao, I’m sorry,” Zeren said quietly. 

She wondered at his tone. There were so many possibilities in her head, but she didn’t think he needed to apologize for any of them. Had he been convinced by his parents that they should separate? She couldn’t blame him for that, for being filial. Was he apologizing for the things his mother had said? Those weren’t within his power to control. 

“Don’t be,” she said, even quieter.

“Qiao.” He knelt in front of her and took her hand.  
“She’s wrong. She doesn’t know. She doesn’t understand how good you are for me.”

“I know. But I can’t ask you to go against your family for me,” she told him, unable to look at his face as tears stung her eyes. 

“You’re not asking. They’re making the situation hard.” He put a hand to her cheek to make her look at him.  
“I’m sorry for bringing you there before they were ready to accept it. It has nothing to do with you. You’re the most important person to me, and someday they’ll see that’s not a threat.”

“Zeren, you barely know me. We’ve known each other, what, six months? How can you trust me over the advice of your parents?” It was a logical argument, but she didn’t believe in her heart. 

Zeren shook his head. “Qiao, I do know you. I’m sure I don’t know everything about you. I’m sure I have plenty to learn. But I know you very well. I feel more comfortable with you than I feel by myself. I know I can trust you.” 

“I don’t want to be a threat to you.”

“Qiao, we’ve already known about this all along. We’ve been so good. We’ve done so much to protect ourselves. We’ve made so many sacrifices. And they’ve all been worth it. Don’t let what she said today change your feelings.” He searched her face for some reassurance. “I was so happy today when you spoke up. You were right. I trust my future with you. We’ll keep supporting each other.” She looked at him softly. She had been very sure of herself when she said it. “I am willing to give up anything but you.”

Qiao sniffed and shook all the doubts out of her head. “You’re right. I won’t give you up either. I love you, and we are good for each other.”

He smiled. “That’s right.” He brought his forehead to hers. “You’re one of my dreams, so you have to help me chase it, okay?”

She smiled back weakly. “Always.”

Zeren pulled her from the chair over to the couch to hold her. “I’m hungry, are you?” he asked as he stroked her hair. 

“Sure. I’ll go make us something,” she said and tried to pull away. 

“How about I just order us something instead and you just stay right here in my arms,” he suggested, already opening his phone. Her nuzzling her face into his chest was her agreement. “I’ll get all your favorites, okay?” He would do anything then to get just one real smile from her, to feel like he hadn’t totally shattered her. “Everything is going to be okay,” he promised her as he held her tightly to his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be my last update until after Zeren’s competition show is over. The next several chapters will incorporate that shit show. I have a lot of feelings about it but I want it to be over before I unleash those opinions in the form of fiction. If you also have thoughts about it feel free to comment. I've been working really hard on the next chapters. Hopefully that will make up for this bit of filler.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiao and Zeren spend some time at home. 
> 
> I'mma be real with you, there's not really like...plot here...it's mostly emotional garbage. This chapter contains angst, fluff, smut, fluff and more angst in that order. It is really a filler chapter, but I'll talk more about that in the notes at the bottom.
> 
> Warning: the smut in this chapter kind of introduces Qiao's praise kink (if that wasn't already obvious) and excentuates Zeren's daddy kink, which in my mind is partially a result of his younger position in the relationship, but that's not really important. There are lots of "daddy, baby (girl), princess," names used here, as well as oral sex both receiving and unprotected sex (as usual). For convenience I've put the smut part in italics, so you can skip it if you prefer. 
> 
> Classic me, over explaining. I'm about to do it a lot more in the end note.

Zeren came home in the middle of the night. He’d only been gone a couple of days, and they’d been busy, leaving him only a little amount of time to miss Qiao. Still, he was looking forward to crawling into the sheets warmed by her presence. Maybe she’d be in just a t-shirt and underwear, her favorite way to sleep. The whole ride from the airport all he could think about was slipping into bed and wrapping his arms around her. She always fell back asleep quickly, and her steady breathing would help him relax and wind down until he found his own sleep. He’d gotten used to this lately. 

When he got home he still tried to move around the apartment quietly. He went first into their room, where he quickly shimmied out of his pants and opened his drawer to pull out a clean t-shirt to sleep in. Then he went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face. As he re-entered the hallway he heard the strangest sound. A whimper, a cry, like the sound of a lost child. His brow furrowed as he followed the sound back to his door. He suddenly realized it was Qiao. He rushed to turn on the bedside lamp before he turned her over from her position facing the wall. 

“Qiao! Baby, wake up,” he said in hushed but urgent tones. Tears were flowing from her closed eyes and he wiped them away as her face turned to the light. She was murmuring something, but he couldn’t understand. “Baby, it’s okay,” he cooed. 

“Zeren, come back,” he heard her say just before her eyes slowly opened. She had to blink away the tears, but when she saw his face Qiao reached for him immediately. Her hands gripped his t-shirt in tight fists and she pushed her face into his stomach. “Thank you, thank you,” she cried against him. 

Zeren hushed her and stroked her hair as she continued to cry. He thought he’d let her have it out, but after it continued for more than a minute without calming down he got really concerned. “Qiao, baby, what’s wrong? You’re worrying me,” he said very quietly, shifting down in the bed to lay more beside her.

“Please don’t leave me for good,” she begged to his face as tears continued to pour down her cheeks. “I promise I’ll be better,” she cried. 

He brushed her hair away. “Baby, what on earth are you talking about?” he asked as he wiped her cheeks with his thumbs. “You’re perfect. I could never leave you,” he promised. 

“Tell me what to do, Zeren,” she sobbed.

It was like she was still in a dream, like she couldn’t hear him. Seeing how desperate and heartbroken she was brought tears to his own eyes, so he pulled her tight against his chest while she continued to gasp for breaths through her sobs. 

“Listen,” he told her. “Just breathe. Everything will be okay if you breathe with me, alright?” He coached her through several deep breaths until she slowly stopped shaking, stopped crying. She rubbed her face against his t-shirt as she slowly became full conscious. 

“Zeren? You’re home?” she asked softly, but a little confused. 

“Of course I’m home. You’re my home,” he said softly and placed a kiss on her hair. 

She raised her eyes to look at him. They were still glossy and red, but he gave her a smile. “I am?”

“Yes,” he smiled wider. “Whenever I’m with you, I’ll be home.”

Her breathing was finally back to normal and she sighed, letting her head fall against his arm. “I was so scared.”

“What scared you, baby?” he asked, feeling a momentary relief as he returned to stroking her hair. 

“I thought you hated me, and you were leaving and not coming back,” she said, barely audible. 

His heart clenched with guilt, skipping a beat in the worst way. He always knew his absences were hard on her, but not that hard. “Qiao, where’d you get such crazy nightmares. That could never happen. I could never hate you.” She closed her eyes and leaned into him, trying to feel peace. “Qiao, have you had this nightmare before?” he wondered. He didn’t quite know why he had to ask. 

She merely shrugged in response. It certainly wasn’t the first time in the last month or so. 

“Baby, that’s never going to happen. I promise. And if you have that nightmare again you better call me, immediately. No matter where I am, or what time it is. I will convince you that I love you, and I’m coming back for you as soon as possible.” That soft urgent tone had returned. 

She smiled at his warmth. “Okay. I will.” She peeked up to see his eyes still a little troubled. “I’m sorry for scaring you. I’m okay now,” she assured him. 

He pulled her up a little, squeezing her tighter in the process, so that their heads rested on each other's shoulders. “I’ll never let you go,” he mumbled into her hair. 

She reached her arm out and pushed him onto his back so she could turn off the bedside lamp. 

“I wasn’t done looking at you,” he complained, pressing kisses into her neck. 

“You can look at me all day tomorrow. You must be tired. Get some sleep,” she said as she cuddled into his side. 

“Fine. But don’t blame me when I do,” he smiled into the darkness and let his eyes close. 

\----

Zeren woke up in the late morning to an empty bed. He had been expecting the love of his life, but instead all he had was a cool bed all to himself. 

“Qiao!” he complained loudly, hoping his voice would carry to wherever she was without him having to get up. 

Qiao’s ladle-baring hand stopped mid-air, dripping batter onto the countertop. The pan had just heated up to the right temperature, but she dropped the ladle in the bowl and turned off the stove. 

“Good morning,” she smiled, sneaking into the bedroom. “I was just about to make pancakes,” she explained, coming dangerously close to the bed. 

“You know I think your pancakes are the stuff of dreams,” he started. 

“I put blueberries in,” she smiled. 

“But I don’t want pancakes. I want you,” he finished, ignoring her comment. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her down across him. He pulled her face to his and gave her a long passionate kiss. “How long have you been awake?” he wondered a minute later as he took a breath, only to press his lips to hers again. 

“A couple of hours,” she admitted against his mouth. 

“You should have woken me,” he whined. 

“But you needed sleep. And you looked so cute.”

He smiled and pulled away from her for a minute. “What have you been doing all this time?” he wondered. 

“Mostly I was scrolling through Weibo until like twenty minutes ago,” she admitted. 

“I thought you got rid of your account.”

“I have a secret account,” she said, as if it were obvious.

“What? Why?”

“So I can see what everyone is posting. And so I can vote on stuff,” she grinned. 

“Do you follow me?” he wondered, kissing her again. 

“Of course. I like all your posts as soon as you post them.”

“And I don’t notice?” 

“Of course not. My profile is a picture of you, and just a basic name. I’m just another faceless DBABY to you.”

“Mm,” he groaned, pushing her over onto her back. “Not fair.”

“What?” she asked against his lips that continued to pursue her. 

He moved to kiss her jaw instead, and spoke near her ear. “I want to follow you. Do you post stuff?”

“Just sappy stuff about how I miss my boyfriend and how cute he is.”

“I wish I could post sappy stuff,” he murmured, drifting down to her throat and sucking a mark into her neck.

“Something tells me sappy isn’t exactly what you’re feeling right now,” she chuckled before it turned into a moan as he sucked on her most sensitive spot. 

“No? What do you think I’m feeling?” he husked as he slid his hand under her shirt. 

_“I think you’re feeling pretty naughty right now, daddy,” she wove her fingers into his dark locks, arching her back into him._

_Zeren pushed the white cotton fabric of her t-shirt up over her supple breasts. “Yes, daddy wants to do such naughty things to his favorite baby,” he said, his breath fanning over her skin._

_“I’m your favorite?” she smiled._

_“Of course, you're the best baby girl. You’re my perfect princess.” He pressed his lips gently around one small perky nipple and sucked on it, teasing his tongue over the nub, making her release a high-pitched whine. “You sound so pretty baby,” he cooed._

_While he trailed kisses through the valley of her breasts he slid his hand over her clothed heat, applying pressure over her nub, bringing out a low moan from both of them as he felt how wet she was already becoming._

_“You’re so excited. Did you miss me?” he smiled up at her._

_“So much,” she nodded._

_“Did you touch yourself while I was gone baby?”_

_She shook her head. “Daddy told me not to.”_

_“I did. And you’re such an obedient girl.” He placed an adoring kiss on her forehead and he continued to rub agonizingly slow over her covered mound, making her squirm._

_“Yes, daddy,” she agreed. She tingled at his praise._

_“I’m going to reward you for being such a good girl,” he grinned. “What does my baby want? Hm?” he kissed her cheek so softly his lips barely touched her smooth skin._

_She hummed for a moment, trying to think while his lips ghosted over her. “I want to sixty-nine with you,” she finally decided._

_He smirked. “Are you sure you’re a good girl?”_

_“Is that not good?” she frowned, her whole face falling into a truly sad expression._

_“It’s very good, princess. If that’s what you want, that’s what you’ll get,” he agreed._

_He brought his lips back to hers and kissed her one last time before he let her up. They both slipped out of their shirts and underwear, and Zeren laid flat on his back._

_“Get up here, baby,” he ordered and she did so with a huge grin._

_Zeren hooked his arms around her legs to bring her down to his face. He hardened almost instantly at the sight of her dripping heat right in front of him. She took his erection in her hand, smearing the precum over his head as it began to leak out and then dropping a line of spit onto him for added lubrication. A small squeal escaped her as he licked a strip from her clit up through her hole while she began to pump him. He lapped up her juice on his tongue and spread it over his lips._

_“Your pussy looks and tastes so good, baby,” he said before taking another lick. “Be a good girl and suck daddy’s cock,” he instructed, anxious to be inside of her._

_Without any further encouragement she brought her wet mouth onto his length until he reached the back of her throat. She gagged on him, her nose buried against his balls, before coming back up for air briefly and sucking him into her mouth once again. Her antics distracted him to the point of only being able to moan until she set a steady pace, bobbing her head up and down on him. Once she did he was able to turn his attention back to her clit. He licked it teasingly a few times, making her hips stutter before he attached his lips to her, hands firmly on her ass to keep her from moving, and sucked gently. He moaned against her bud as she hollowed her cheeks on him and pushed her hips farther down on him. His tongue circled her pleasure bringing her to new heights while she sped up her pace on his cock. When he was getting closer to his high than he wanted to, he took his mouth off of her and dipped his fingers into her arousal, spreading it over her clit as he began to rub fast circles over the bundle of nerves. It was distracting enough to make her slow down and eventually pop off him all together as she began to cry out his name._

_“Zeren, you’re gonna make me come, daddy!” he nearly screamed._

_“I wanna see my little girl come in my face,” he moaned as she continued to stroke him. She squeaked out an expletive as she peaked, clenched around nothing. He only stopped his movements to slap her clit. “Don’t say words like that, princess,” he said roughly._

_She jumped at the smack. “Sorry,” she whimpered, putting her mouth back on the head of his cock while he licked up the extra arousal that dripped from her throbbing lips._

_When he’d had his fill he pushed her hips forward, indicating for her to ride him by moving up slightly in the bed and moving her entrance over his cock, and he gave her a firm spank. She took him in her hand to slide onto him smoothly, her soaked walls making up for the tightness. Zeren let out a satisfied groan as she brought her ass down to his hips.  
The feeling of his length running against her velvety walls was only amplified by watching himself disappear completely inside of her. She sat back, allowing for him to glide perfectly over her g-spot and their moans came in unison. He grasped her hands that were floating freely in the air and brought them down on his chest so he could reach her breasts and massage them while she bounced on top of him. After a few minutes she lost her rhythm as her strength started to give out and he threw her to the side on the bed, moving swiftly to position himself between her legs once more. Her mouth fell open while she looked up at him through a lusty haze as he slid slowly into her. He leaned over her as he gave her his full length, holding himself up with one hand while the other stroked the hair off her cheek. _

_“There’s my pretty girl. I missed your face,” he smiled before kissing her, pushing his tongue into her open mouth._

_Qiao reached her hands around his back and held onto his shoulders as he picked up the pace and fucked into her. Her hips came up to meet his and she clenched her walls around him to give him every bit of pleasure._

_“Are you trying to make me come baby girl?” he smiled and bit his lip._

_“Yes. I want daddy to feel good,” she whined against the sound skin slapping._

_“I feel so good, baby.”_

_“I want you to fill me up with your cum, daddy,” she moaned in his ear as he moved even faster._

_“I love it when you say stuff like that,” he grunted._

_She caught his face in her hands, making him look up from her lips to her eyes. “I love you so much,” she whimpered._

_“Oh, baby, I love you so much, too,” he replied quietly, just before her came while looking his lover in the eyes. They closed quickly after and he rested his head in the crook of her neck. “Thank you,” he whispered against her collar bone before leaving a kiss there._

“You don’t have to thank me for orgasms,” she chuckled. 

“I know. I just mean, thank you for being here, for being mine, for being the person and the place I come home to.” He looked up and brushed sweat off her brow. “I want you to always know how much I admire and appreciate you, and how much I miss you when we’re apart, which I know is often. But I think you’re incredible in everything you do.”

“Stop, you’re gonna make me horny again,” she chuckled. 

“I love feeding your praise kink. It makes me so happy,” Zeren grinned. 

“Is that what it’s called when I get turned on by your compliments?” she wondered, and he nodded happily. “So you’re just saying nice things to get me all hot and bothered?”

“Qiao, do you ever listen to anything I say?” he griped, pulling away from her, but she pulled him back in. 

“I’m kidding. I do listen. And I appreciate you. I’m glad you understand my need for praise in and out of bed and you don’t hate me for it. It’s very refreshing.I also hate that we’re apart so much, but it’s nice to be here when you come home,” she forced a smile. She meant it wholeheartedly, it was just painful to think about what it was like when they were separated. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll always be back,” he promised. “Now let’s get you cleaned up so we can have pancakes.” He left her with a kiss on her nose and pushed himself off.

“Yes!” Zeren hissed as they laid on the couch a couple hours later after finally eating. 

“What?” Qiao turned her head in Zeren’s lap to look up at him from the screen. 

“Let me follow you on Weibo,” he said, handing her his phone. 

She took and looked at the screen. “Did you really open a fake account just so you could follow me?”

“Technically, I opened it a couple years ago to browse weibo privately, but I didn’t have to work to reopen it,” he admitted.

“You’re gonna get shut down like Quanzhe,” she laughed, handing him back the phone. 

“I am not. I literally only want to follow you. Please,” Zeren begged, pushing it toward her again. 

“I really don’t know why you want this. There’s literally nothing about it that is special,” Qiao rolled her eyes. 

“Because it would be like...a remotely normal thing for us to do,” Zeren told her, giving her big puppies eyes she couldn’t resist. 

“Fine,” she sighed and searched for her account, pressing the request button when she found it before handing the phone back to him and turning her face to the screen again. 

“Um, aren’t you going to accept my request?” he asked, holding her phone above her face. She stared up at him while he dangled it over her tauntingly. Just as she was about to reach for it, the device slipped from his fingertips and fell on her forehead, making her scream in pain. “Oh, shit! Qiao! I’m so sorry, baby! Are you okay?” he asked as she covered her face, her eyes watering from the pain. “Let me see,” he cooed, pulling her hands away. There was a red mark on her forehead, but nothing too bad. He leaned down to kiss the spot and then pepper the rest of her face with kisses. 

“I’m not accepting you now,” she pouted, touching her bruised head carefully. 

“No, baby, please! I’ll do anything to make it up to you. Anything at all. Hold on. I’ll go get you some ice!” he told her, nearly knocking her off the couch in his hurry. 

Qiao picked up her phone and typed out a new post. “My boyfriend has been home for all of twelve hours and he’s given me a head wound.” She posted it and then accepted his follow request. Zeren hurried back at the sound of the notification on his phone. He handed her an ice pack and then fished in the couch cushions for his phone, smiling brightly at her notification. 

“I can’t believe you’re using this picture of me. It’s so old,” he chuckled as he saw a picture from just after debut next to her profile name. Qiao didn’t respond, just sank herself into the couch cushions, holding the ice to her head and continued to pout. “Oh, Qiao, no! I’m so sorry. Everyone is going to think your boyfriend is the worst. Please take it down,” he whined. 

“Well, he is!” she mumbled. “But it doesn’t matter. Look at my follower count.”

“Who’s your other follower?” he wondered as he clicked on the link. “It’s literally just the weibo account. Babe, you need friends.”

“Don’t rub it in,” she grumbled. 

“Aw. I was just teasing. Do you really need friends though?” he wondered as he rejoined her on the couch. 

“No. I mean, I have all of you guys. And I don’t need friends on weibo. I’m fine,” she shrugged. 

Zeren sat on the couch with her, lifting up her legs to sit beneath them and stroke them while he talked. “But, what about other friends? Like girl friends?”

“I still have friends. I talk to them occasionally, but really, what’s the point when I can’t even tell them what’s going on in my life,” she replied cynically. “I can’t tell them about you.”

Zeren groaned. “Nooo. I don’t want you to be so isolated because of me. It’s making me feel bad.”

“Really, Ze, it’s fine. Remember what happened with Wenchu? I’m not going to let that happen again. It’s not your fault. It’s just how things are.” Zeren rested his chin on her knee, showing her his wide sad eyes again, his lips pursed into a small line that managed to show his dimples. “I have my best friend right here. What else could I need?” she smiled lovingly at him. 

“Aw, I’m your best friend?” he asked in the cutest voice.

“Yes, don’t cry about it.”

“You’re the last one to tell anyone not to cry,” he grumbled. 

“That was uncalled for,” she sniffed. 

“No. I’m sorry! Don’t cry!” He panicked and pulled himself up to place kisses on her cheeks. 

“I got you!”

“Not nice,” he frowned before kissing her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm gonna get a little ranty and over explaining, but what you should not short and sweet is we're about to get into Zeren's time on Shine! Super Brothers because I been going through it with that shit show. You can go now if you want. 
> 
> First I just want to reiterate my thanks for you reading this work because it actually means a lot to me. The work and you. Writing this fan fiction has helped me work through some of my feelings I've been struggling with about love and romantic relationships for a while. Like I've said these characters don't really reflect the actual members and I know that. Qiao and Zeren aren't perfect but they're pretty great and I really love them. I honestly can't tell you how far this fic will go. They prolly gonna grow old together. 
> 
> ANYWAY. The real reason for this end not is that we are about to enter a timeline where Zeren is going on Shine! Super Brothers, which if you haven't watched it, has been a complete shit show with lots of disappointments and hard lessons for my number one baby boy, and basically since this is my fan fiction I'm going to work out my frustrations about that HERE. I hope you enjoy that. If you've also been frustrated please commiserate with me in the comments. Luckily for my Zeren he has Qiao to help him through the struggle. Qiao's not going to be a lump waiting around at home anymore, though. My girl's about to make some moves. 
> 
> When I took this work on "hiatus" to wait for the end of this shit show after chapter 28, I literally thought it was going to be ten days. That turned into a month and since they still haven't announced EVERYONE who made it to the finals I've lost all my patience and I'm moving forward anyway. That means some minor details may have to change later, but I'll just LIVE WITH IT and let you know. So forgive me for this bit of filler, I just literally couldn't stand not updating anymore because I literally have at least ten chapters of this next section coming up. I'm working out how to organize that so I can post on a SCHEDULE. I'm excited. See you soon. <3


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Change is in the air.
> 
> disclaimer: It's not like I've ever gone easy on Yuehua in this fic. I think their management style is weird to say the least. But before anyone misinterprets what I write here just know that what I want more than anything is for NEXT to have a comeback and work as a functional band. I understand the pandemic has had an impact on their work just like it has had an impact on literally everything, but I would rather them being 7 members together than soloists. That being said, what I've really seen through this show is that Zeren is someone who wants to perform, and I really want that for him as well, because he's incredible and he deserves everything.

Zeren came home from a recording session for his birthday single to find Qiao laying in the same position she had been in when he left at least eight hours earlier. It looked like she hadn’t moved at all.

“Did you do anything fun today?” he asked as he sat by her feet.

“No,” she snorted ironically at the suggestion.

“Did you go anywhere?” He’d been asking these questions for days. She shook her head without taking her eyes off her phone. “Qiao when was the last time you left the apartment?” he asked, even though he already knew the answer. 

Qiao’s eyes roamed around as if searching the room for the answer. She shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Zeren had had enough, and he decided it was time for some tough love. He grabbed her arm and pulled her to her feet. She would have protested, if she weren’t so confused. He opened the front door to the hallway, throwing her out and slamming the door in her face, allowing the automatic lock to take care of the rest.

“Zeren what the hell are you doing?!” she shouted, banging on the door. 

He could hear her all the way to her room where he went to grab a pair of her shoes. He opened the door just enough to toss her sneakers into the hallway and shut it quickly again.

“Zeren!” she yelled, charging at the door. “Let me inside, now!”

“Not for at least two hours. You haven’t left this apartment in a week. It’s not healthy,” he said back loudly. “I’m doing this for your own good.”

She leaned against the door. “Are you really going to waste our precious time together like this?” she asked in a regular volume. 

“It’s not a waste. I’ll gladly spend my time taking care of you if you won’t take care of yourself. This is care. Now go, get some boba or something. Don’t come home for a couple of hours,” he insisted. 

“Ze!”

“I’m watching you through the security camera and I’m going to add an hour to the time I’m locking you out for every minute you linger in the hallway. Get!”

“Ugh!" She dropped to the ground to put her shoes on. "I’m not bringing you anything.”

“I’m making dinner for you. See you in a couple of hours,” he told her and watched her walk slowly down the hall to the elevator. 

Qiao went out to the nearest cafe and got boba like he suggested, not willing to come up with any ideas of her own. She walked down to a nearby park and sat on a bench for over an hour. The sun was shining and it was actually a beautiful day. She’d left with her phone but no headphones, so she could only listen to the sounds of the park: children laughing, birds chirping, joggers feet crunching by on the path. She watched jealously as young couples walked by hand in hand. It was a nice change from being in the apartment, but she didn’t extend her stay any longer than was required, and she arrived back at the apartment exactly two hours after she’d been thrown out. She had to call Zeren from the lobby because she didn’t even have her keycard to get on the elevator. 

“Did you have a nice afternoon?” he asked as they took the long elevator ride up.

“It was fine,” she pouted. 

“Your complexion looks better. You got some sunshine. That’s good,” he said, brushing her cheek. She still felt warm, but she flinched away from him. 

“You’re mean,” she grumbled. 

“I only want to help,” he argued. “You can’t stay inside all the time. It’s not healthy.”

She was quiet for a moment, listening to the whirring of the elevator as she brooded. “Do you think we’ll ever get to go outside together?” she wondered. 

“Someday, definitely. This won’t be forever.” He took her hand as the elevator opened on their floor and led her to the apartment. He had just laid out a romantic dinner for them when she called. 

“Did you kick me out so you could do all of this?” she asked, looking at the table set for two with candles and all. 

“I can have multiple reasons for doing a thing,” he smirked. “Sit.”

“I think I have a bottle of wine that would go great with this,” she said, turning to go to the kitchen. 

“How about just water?” he suggested. 

“Boring,” she scoffed. 

“Qiao,” he said in a tone that made her stop and look at him. “I know you’ve been drinking a lot when I’m out of town,” he said with his hands in his pockets. 

She crossed her arms. “So?”

“So, I think maybe you should take a break,” he suggested. 

“I have taken a break? It’s not a big deal. So I drink some wine while you’re out of town. I’m bored.”

“It’s not good for you.”

“Stop telling me what is and isn’t good for me!” she snapped. “Stop nagging and controlling me and just let me live my life!”

"Qiao, I just want you to take care of yourself. I need you to see that your health is important. I can't be the only one to care about it. Don't make me worry about you." He gave her his pleading eyes and she couldn’t help resenting him a little for it, feeling he was using it against her rather than showing genuine concern.

"Well then don't worry about me. No one is asking you to. Let me take care of myself, and you can just forget about it."

"Qiao, you know that's not how it works. And I didn't mean it like I don't want to care for you. I just want you to care about yourself. I know that you've had a lot of tough breaks lately. I know some of it is my fault, directly or indirectly. But it's so hard for me to see you in pain like this. I guess maybe I'm not going about things the right way, but you know I'll do anything to make you happy, so please tell me what I can do."

"You think I want to feel like this?” she cried, pain coloring her words. “You think I want to be this lost and unhappy. What can I do, Ze?” 

"You can't even look at the keyboard. I know you haven't written anything in months. I actually miss the Qiao that I had to drag to bed and meals. Maybe you should be trying to write through whatever this is you’re going through,” he argued, not understanding that was the entirely wrong nerve to strike. 

“I can’t, Zeren! Music used to be my refuge. But I can’t see the point when I can’t share what I create. Du Hua’s got me stuck in this stupid exclusive contract where I can’t sell my music to anyone else, but surprise! She’s not promoting musicians at this time! So what am I supposed to do?” She stood staring at him through blurry eyes, drawing in a ragged breath. “Zeren, I felt so lucky when I got offered to work for Yuehua like this. I thought it was a huge break. I thought I’d get to make a name for myself with some songs for a great group, and it would lead to a lot of future opportunities. But what if they realized that I wasn’t really that great? What if I don’t get any other opportunities?” Tears began to roll down her cheeks and she wiped them away in embarrassment before Zeren could close the gap between them to do it for her. 

“Qiao, that’s just crazy. What happened with Yuehua wasn’t any kind of reflection on your talent. If they didn’t think you’re really talented, they would just release you from your contract, but they obviously do. You’ve already made a name for yourself. You’re going to have so many more opportunities in the future,” he assured her, tucking her into his chest.

“But what if I don’t. Will you still love me? Will I still be someone worth defying your family for? Will I still be worth all the trouble?” she mumbled through her tears.

He pushed her away just enough to see her face. “Have you completely lost your mind? We _are_ going to be a total power couple. So, just jot that down. But even if your insane fears come true, and you have to find some other way of putting your numerous talents to use, you will still be my world. We’ll leave this insanity behind and I’ll teach dance and you’ll teach piano. Or we’ll run away to somewhere far away and forget this life ever happened. I’d go anywhere with you. Don’t for a second think that I’ll stop loving you.”

Her gaze fell from his eyes to the floor. “But I don’t want to drag you down.”

He pulled her as close. “You never could. All you do is encourage me. You’re my number one fan. My hype woman. All I need is for you to be with me, healthy, and you’re already pushing me forward. I can do anything because of that. So don’t worry about my career. Don’t worry about my parents. They’re going to realize what’s really important someday. I already know what’s important to me. I’ve got it all right here in my arms.”

She sighed and sank into his chest. She wanted to believe him, to feel his confidence and his love for her, but she was tired from being depressed and drained from her outburst, so she wasn’t ready for it yet.

“Qiao, why don't you come to Guangzhou? You can see everyone together and you can see us perform. Those things always make you happy,” he offered, feeling the tension that remained in her body. 

"I dont...I don't want to see her." Qiao said quietly against his chest.

He wanted to tell her to stop blaming Du Hua for all her problems, but he didn't want to have that fight right now, so he took a different angle. "I really don't want to leave you here alone."

"Why not? You leave me here alone all the time." The words left her lips so quietly she didn’t think she even meant to say them out loud. But he heard them, and he went completely rigid

"Qiao," he whispered painfully.

She shook her head as new tears welled and then fell. "I'm sorry. I know that's not fair. I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry. I’m sorry," she repeated. She sank to the floor and wanted to disappear, but he was coming down with her no matter what. 

"Qiao, I'm sorry you feel so alone right now. I don't want you to be alone. I want to be here. I love you. All your brothers love you. We want you to be happy. We're sorry we can't help, but you aren't alone," he promised her softly in her ear. 

“I’m really sorry Zeren. I shouldn’t have said that. You know I don’t blame you.”

“I know. It’s okay. Please come. Now I really really don’t want to leave you alone,” he whispered. 

She shook her head. “No. I honestly don’t want to see everyone. But I’ll try to adjust my state while you’re gone. I’ll try to be better,” she sniffed.

He tried to convince her to eat the dinner he’d prepared, but she’d lost her appetite and she only pretended to eat. They both slept uneasily, knowing that he’d be leaving her for several days in the morning. 

\----

The boys were back together for another performance of ‘Show you’. As usual they all arrived from different parts and had very little time to rehearse. The exhaustion of several members was making practice even more frustrating, especially for Zeren, but he knew he couldn’t blame them. He knew they’d put on the best show they could, but in rehearsal there simply wasn’t any fire. If he was honest, even he was feeling a little off, but he was still giving it everything he had.

“Is Qiao-jie waiting for us at the hotel?” Justin asked as they gathered their belongings in the dressing room to go back for the night. 

“No, she’s in Beijing,” Zeren told him, his voice subdued. 

“She’s not coming?” Xinchun sounded surprised. 

“I tried to get her to come out, but she wouldn’t.” Zeren didn’t want to look at any of them. Even after their conversation she had still refused to come, so he had no choice but to leave her home to ruminate.

“What’s going on with her? Why is my sister so depressed? Did you do something?” Zhengting asked, more aggressive than usual. 

Zeren sighed heavily. “I won’t say none of it is my fault,” he admitted. “I haven’t done anything to hurt her, not on purpose. Mostly things just haven’t been going well for her the last couple months. I honestly don’t know what to do.” Zeren shook his head regretfully and walked out, leading the others to the van. On the ride to the hotel he told Zhengting and Wenjun about how devastating losing the album was to her, about the incident with his parents and then to top it all off how he was working on a song with someone else. He knew that she really wasn’t holding that against him, but she might have been holding it against the company in addition to everything else. 

“She tries to humor me when I’m at home, but I really don’t know what I can do to make things better. I’ve tried spending time with her, buying her things. If I could take her anywhere you know I would. I’d take her fucking anywhere to see her really smile just once. I feel helpless, Zhengting. I don’t know what to do,” he confessed to the older boy.

Zhengting had come fully prepared to hold his junior accountable. But for one thing he could see how upset it was making him, and for another he knew it could be hard for his sister to get herself out of a mood. Even he wasn’t an expert at helping her.

“I know, didi. She can be a tough nut to crack when she’s down. She won’t even talk to me. She just tells me everything is fine even though I can feel that it’s not. She knows I know she’s lying, but she can’t even face it herself.” Zhengting sighed and rested his hand on Zeren’s knee. “I’ll try to think of something.”

Zeren hummed. “There’s one other thing I need to tell you about,” Zeren started, looking nervously around at the other guys before making eye contact with Quanzhe. They waited for him to go on. “In November, I’ll be going on a new competition show.”

“What?” Justin yelled. “You’re leaving the band?!” He stood and was sent falling back into his seat when the van hit a bump. 

Zeren shook his head. “I’m not leaving. It’s just an opportunity to perform for a few months, to be seen, to make some connections.”

The other guys stared at him, not quite sure what to make of his announcement. 

“He’s not the only one. I’m also going on a show,” Quanzhe confessed. 

“What the hell? When was this decided?” Zhengting asked, surprised he hadn’t been told by Du Hua herself. 

“It was just decided a few days ago,” Zeren said quietly, looking at his fingertips. 

“So that’s it, you’re just going to abandon us?” Chengcheng asked. 

Zeren’s fists clenched and his eyes narrowed on Chengcheng. “Us? First of all, the three of you have been in two groups before, so don’t act like it isn’t possible for Quanzhe. Secondly, all _five_ of you have abandoned us a long time ago. Wenjun, Zhengting and Chengcheng are filming dramas all through next year. Minghao and Xinchun have like three variety shows a piece. How dare you come at us to say we’re the ones abandoning you? We need the exposure.”

“Zeren and I just want to perform. We want to be part of a group. Performing one night every month or two? That’s where we are now? You can’t blame us for wanting more,” Quanzhe said quietly. 

The other boys looked at each other uneasily knowing he was right. 

“Fine. But have you told Qiao yet?” Zhengting asked, getting back to the original purpose of this conversation.

“I was going to, but we kind of had this fight, and she’s so fragile right now,” Zeren said. Really he was just afraid to. He didn’t want to make her mood any worse.  
“You better do it sooner rather than later,” the leader told him. 

\----

When Zeren and Quanzhe arrived back at the apartment they were surprised to find Qiao wasn’t there. Zeren searched all the rooms, but there was no sign of her. He called her, but she didn’t pick up. He was a little relieved, though, glad she had finally left the apartment. She came back an hour later carrying a bag full of snacks and bubble tea for each of them. 

“What’s all this?” Quanzhe asked. 

“Just some treats for my favorite boys. Welcome home,” she smiled and handed the items over to him. 

“Have we been upgraded for favorite boys?” Quanzhe beamed. “Zhengting and Wenjun are going to be so mad.”

“There’s my favorite girl,” Zeren grinned, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist, even picking her up off the ground an inch or two. 

“So happy to see me?” she wondered with a smile.

“I’m always happy to see you,” he whispered before kissing her cheek. He set her down and pulled away to get a good look at her. “You’re in a good mood.”

She shrugged. “Just happy you’re home.”

Zeren felt torn. He wanted to get telling her the news out of the way, but he was afraid it would ruin her good mood. He decided he had to do it as soon as possible anyway. “Qiao, Quanzhe and I need to talk to you about something,” he started, pulling her over to the couch. 

Quanzhe followed, already digging into a bag of chips. He set the snacks down on the table. Qiao grabbed her drink and sucked up the tapioca balls, ready to listen. Zeren cleared his throat and then looked at Quanzhe, who looked surprised. 

“Okay, what’s going on?” she laughed. 

“Okay, here’s the deal. In November, I’ll be going on a new competition show, and Quanzhe will also be starting one soon to possibly debut in a new band.” Both boys looked at her nervously. 

“That’s great!” she said to their surprise. 

Zeren’s face contorted into a look of shock. “Really?”

“Yeah, of course. It will give you a challenge and exposure. And when you make it maybe you’ll actually get to perform. Aren’t you happy?” she wondered. 

“Um, yeah, I am,” he stammered, and he was, but he was also caught off guard by her reaction. “I thought you would be upset.”

“Why would I be?” Her brow furrowed, confused. 

“The other guys are kind of mad at us,” Quanzhe told her. “They think we’re giving up on NEXT.”

“Pfft. More like NEXT has given up on you,” she muttered, her disillusion with the whole of Yuehua apparent in her tone. “This was all Du Hua’s idea, was it not?” They both nodded. “Then what the hell can they have to think about it?”

“Yeah, that’s pretty much what we told them,” Zeren confirmed. 

“I fully believe that NEXT will make a comeback someday, but since it doesn’t look to be anytime soon, you two should go after whatever it is you want. And I will dedicate every moment to cheering you on and supporting you. Now who wants to have a movie marathon and eat too much?” she asked.

“See, this is why you’re my favorite girl,” Zeren smiled, pulling her in to peck her with kisses all over her face. 

\----

“Thank you for supporting me,” Zeren told her as they lay in bed that night. “I was really terrified you'd be upset with me for saying yes.”

Qiao touched her hand to his cheek. “Zeren, I’ve promised to always support you. I doubt Du Hua even gave you an option to disagree, but regardless, I think it could be something that will make you happy. And all I want is for you to be happy.”

He smiled at her through the darkness and brushed his fingertips across the apple of her cheek. “You seem happier, too. What’s changed?” he wondered.

“I haven’t been able to escape the feeling that my work is being disrespected by the way Yuehua is treating it. Maybe it’s really arrogant or self-centered, but I want those songs to be made. I want them recorded and shared with the world. I can’t even write anything right now because I don’t want it to fall into the abyss. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what’s important to me, like you said. And what I want is creative freedom. I’m trying to think of a way to get out of my contract with them. I want to be able to offer my songs to other groups. I want to see them recorded and performed. I want more of that feeling I got when I saw you guys perform “show you”. I haven’t figured out a way, yet, but I’m tired of wallowing in it, and I can’t wait for this contract to run out. But I have a feeling I’m going to find a way soon. I’m on the watch for it.”

Zeren smiled and kissed her forehead. “That will be good then. I want to hear your songs, too. Even if I don’t get to sing them.”

“How’s your single coming?” she wondered. 

“It’s good. We’ll finish recording this week.” He averted his eyes from her as he spoke, always nervous to bring it up with her.

“I can’t wait to hear it,” she smiled. 

“You’re truly amazing. I really love you a little more each day,” he said quietly, looking at her in the darkness with real wonder in his eyes.

She ducked her head a little, so he couldn’t look directly at her as she confessed her shame. “I’ve been wanting to apologize to you for a few days. I got really emotional the other night and I know that’s annoying to have to deal with, so I’m sorry.”

“Qiao, what makes you feel like that was annoying?” he wondered softly. 

She hesitated self consciously. “That’s what my other boyfriends have said in the past. I know I can be a lot when I’m ‘in my feelings’ or whatever,” she muttered, repeating the phrase others had used against her.

Zeren tilted her face up to him. “Baby, I don’t know what kind of jerks you used to date, but you are not annoying. Your feelings are not annoying. They’re not too much, and neither are you. I hope you know I’m not trying to lift your mood because I find it annoying. I just don’t want to watch you suffer. But I’d almost prefer the crying and the yelling and the outbursts because at least we were communicating about it. I’m not afraid of your emotions, but I don’t want you to be either. I just want you to be well.” She nodded that she understood and he kissed her nose. “I understand what it’s like to be ‘in your feelings’ as you put it, better than you might think,” he said after a moment. 

“Really?” With the exception of his jealousy that she’d seen a couple of times, she always thought he was calm and collected.

He hummed. “Growing up like I did, in the dorms, in training, especially at SM, we weren’t really allowed to be emotional. The teachers weren’t there to be our parents. And if we got upset about something that happened in training or at school or with the other trainees, the response was always that it was bad for your health to be so angry, or you needed to be tough to debut, you couldn’t get upset over little things. And the punishment for acting out or having an outburst was always more training or more exercise. But, it wasn’t always easy for me. I’ve always been pretty emotional, I just learned to hide it. I would punish myself with more training when I was upset. I would work it out that way, and I guess that’s why you say you can see how I’m feeling when I dance. I guess, I internalized some of that philosophy and now I think of being emotional as being in poor health, and I’m sorry if I’ve pushed that on you. But I do genuinely want you to take care of yourself. Stay hydrated,” he chuckled. 

Qiao smiled at him first, and then laughed lightly. 

“What are you laughing at?” he wondered.

“It’s just something Minghao said when I was offered that contract back in August,” she said. 

Zeren propped himself up on his elbow and tucked her hair behind her ear, touching playfully at the shell of her ear as he asked, “and what did our dear Minghao say?”

“He said that it was a good thing I didn’t take the contract, because I’m too sensitive,” she told him.

“Well, he’s probably right,” Zeren agreed. 

“He also said I was lazy,” she continued.

“Weeeeeeelllll,” Zeren smiled, and she pushed him over onto his back even though she knew it was true, at least in a physical sense.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At this point I plan to proceed under the assumption that Shine! Super Brothers is not debuting a band at the end of whatever this shit show is. There have been conflicting reports. I'm not even use when this crap is supposed to end anymore, but if adjustments need to be made I will let you know.  
> In the mean time, I plan to update on Saturdays and Wednesday, because honestly I have so much and it's been sitting there for so long I don't even like it anymore.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Change has finally come. Mostly fluff and smut! (Smut is in italics, can be skipped)
> 
> I'm also going to start using some screen shots of text conversations bc that's how they'll have to communicate while he's gone and I hate trying to write them out. >.<

On the first day of November the word came from the execs that they were dissolving the apartment. Each of the members were going to have to find their own places to live by the end of the year. For some of them, Justin and Wenjun in particular, the apartment had become little more than a landing pad for the night or two that they spent in Beijing each month. But for Zeren, Quanzhe and Qiao, the apartment was home, and moving was a major concern. 

“What are you going to do?” Zeren asked Qiao as the three of them sat around the living the night they had received the news. They didn’t need to discuss what they already knew: they couldn’t get a place together. 

“I’m not sure. I could just go home to my mom,” she said, thinking out loud. “It’s not like I’m doing any work here anyway,” she said, barely covering up her frustration. 

“What does Ting-ge think?” he wondered. 

She shook her head. She hadn’t talked to him. “You guys will both be gone soon enough. You could go home to your parents, too.”

Zeren looked at her critically. Zeren had hardly spoken to his mother since he introduced her to Qiao. He wouldn’t go live there if they refused to accept his relationship. 

“I don’t know when I’ll be leaving for the show. And I don’t really want to go home to Liaoning,” Quanzhe admitted. He was enjoying his space, but he didn’t want to live alone either. He wouldn’t say it, but he was enjoying living with his best friends. 

The trio sat in silence for a while longer. Zeren’s relationship with Qiao was already complicated enough. In a way he worried it only existed at all because they had been able to live together. They already had to spend more time apart than he wanted because of work, and if they lived apart from each other, being together would be even harder. He didn’t care about having to move, but he did care that wherever he went she would be there, too. 

“I have an idea,” Zeren said suddenly, a little light returning to his gloomy mood. “We could get apartments in the same building. Quanzhe, you and I could live together. And then Qiao, Zhengting and Wenjun. You know, officially.” 

Quanzhe’s face lit up, too. It was a perfect plan for him. He nodded enthusiastically at Zeren. 

A sweet smile spread across Zeren’s face as he looked at Qiao, who seemed thrilled by the idea. He liked the idea of having a home with Qiao. One that wasn’t owned by the company. One that someday could be filled with pets and her being there whenever he came back. A place that was their own. It filled him with warmth and love for his partner. 

They called Zhengting to run the idea past him. He agreed happily for him and Wenjun. Everyone was sure the tall man would go along with whatever plan the way he usually did, and if not Zhengting would be able to talk him into it or they could move ahead without him. And with that confirmation Qiao went ahead looking for apartments. Everyone let her choose since it was easier for her, and she would spend the most time there anyway. She searched with enthusiasm, thrilled to be able to look at what she wanted instead of what she could afford for the first time. She went on her own to several places until she found the one she loved and invited Quanzhe and Zeren to meet the leasing agent with her. 

“There are three bedrooms and two bathrooms,” Qiao chattered excitedly as she led them into the apartment. “The floors are wood, so the third room could be a dance studio. And it’s on an outside wall, so you wouldn’t disturb anyone with your music. Plus, there’s another one just like it right across the hall that’s available.”

“What will you do with the third room over there?” Quanzhe wondered as they peeked in the kitchen. 

“A recording studio, of course,” she smiled. They continued to wander through the apartment. “What do you think?” she asked Zeren quietly as they looked in the bedrooms. It was obviously smaller than the penthouse, but the bedrooms were actually a little larger. “We can have pets, too.”

He smiled at her softly. “As long as you’ll be here, I’ll live anywhere you want,” he told her. 

“But do you like it?” she wanted to know. 

“It looks great. I have no complaints,” he assured her, and she settled for that answer. 

“We can move in as soon as next week,” she smiled, hugging him. 

“What’s the rush? We don’t have to leave the other apartment until January 1st.”

“There’s no rush, I just really want to get my studio started, and I don’t want these apartments to get snatched up.”

“I’m leaving for Wuxi in less than a week, and I’m filming the music video all week until then,” Zeren reminded her. 

“Yeah, I know. But I’m still going to be here. And it would be a really great distraction if I could start moving on with my life,” she said, a little annoyed. 

“What does that mean?” he wondered as she turned away from him. 

“I haven’t said anything because I’ve been focused on finding a new place, but I think this whole thing is my way out of the contract. They were supposed to provide housing for me, and now they’ve taken it away, so they’ve broken their end of the agreement. I can negotiate my way out of it now. I just need to get a lawyer.”

“Why don’t you contact my brother?” 

“Do you think he’d work with me? With how things are with your parents?” she wondered.

“He has his own mind. Besides, it’s business. I’ll ask him,” he assured her. 

“Okay. But I still want to be settled first. I want to get out of there and set up my studio here and then go to them.”

“Whatever you want, love. If Quanzhe and Zhengting agree, then we’ll do it as soon as possible.” He pulled her into a hug. “As long as I get to be with you,” he said, kissing her hair.

Qiao did most of the packing and planning while Zeren finished his music video and prepared for the show. Packing for her wasn’t that hard, since she’d come into the NEXT apartment with practically nothing. She’d never realized how many clothes her boyfriend had. 

“How many black coats do you need?” she asked him, holding just two of many in her hands, when he walked in on her packing things into boxes. 

“Can’t have too many,” he said, wrapping her in a sweaty back hug and kissing her cheek. 

“I guess, if it makes you happy,” she laughed. 

\----

“Work hard. You’re going to blow them away,” Qiao encouraged as Zeren embraced her on the morning he left for the show. 

“Thanks, baby. I’ll be back on my birthday,” he reminded her. 

“I’ll be waiting for you at the new place,” she smiled.

“You’re going to be too busy to miss me.”

“Hopefully!” she grinned. “Now go. Make me proud.”

Qiao almost was too busy to have time to miss him. She had a lot to get done in the few days between when he left and when he would return. She wanted to celebrate his birthday in their new home, and it was up to her and Quanzhe to have the place ready by then. They let Quanzhe have the master bedroom on the opposite side of the apartment from Zeren’s room and the room they were going to make into a dance studio. They couldn’t do any major remodeling, but Qiao figured out a way to install mirrors along one of the walls. She bought a speaker system for the room. She made sure the wood floor was properly treated. Quanzhe gave it the seal of approval. While she was working late into the night she got a text from Zeren.

Once they had all their stuff moved into the boys apartment and organized they turned their attention to the other apartment. Next door everything else took a back seat to setting up the recording studio. It was a pretty daunting process, trying to understand the acoustics of the room, modify it for the best sound quality and choosing a set up for all her equipment, and they were still in the middle of it when Qiao said they had to stop to get ready for Zeren to come home. 

It was odd for him that he had to knock on his own door, but he hadn’t gotten the keys yet. He only had to wait in the hallway for a moment with his managers before Qiao opened the door. She and Quanzhe yelled “happy birthday!” and threw confetti over him. 

“Thank you,” he smiled widely at the warm reception. He took Qiao in his arms and kissed her before whispering his thanks again. Quanzhe caught the whole thing on her phone. 

“Hey, where’s my kiss?” Quanzhe teased.

“Come here, didi,” Zeren said and chased him around the apartment with arms outstretched. 

“Wait, no!” Qiao squealed as Quanzhe ran to Zeren’s side of the apartment. They were supposed to show him as a surprise, so she had to chase after them, too, leaving the managers alone in the living room. Zeren chased Quanzhe into the dance studio and tackled him to the ground. “Let me kiss you!” he yelled as Quanzhe tried to fight him off. 

“Hey!” Qiao cried to get their attention. Zeren stopped and looked up at her curiously. “Surprise!” she yelled, holding out her hands to gesture to the room.

“Wha-” Zeren looked around him. “Oh, hey!” He finally climbed off the poor younger member to take a look at the room, noticing the wall of mirrors and the expensive speakers she’d installed. 

“Quanzhe said this would work as a practice room. I hope you like it,” she said timidly. 

“This is great. I can’t believe you guys did this while I was gone,” he smiled. He turned to Qiao to hug her again. “Thank you.”

Quanzhe stopped recording and left them alone in the room. 

“Here.” Qiao pulled a set of keys from her pocket and put him in his hand. “This one is for here, and the other one is for my place. Welcome home,” she smiled. 

“I get a key to your place?” he asked with a lopsided smile. 

“Yeah, of course. We all get a key to both, actually. Just in case.”

Zeren cupped her cheek in his hand. “I knew I would love coming home to you. I didn’t know I would love it this much,” he said softly before he kissed her. 

“Zeren?” one of the managers called from down the hall. 

“Oh, right. I’m doing a live chat for my birthday. You know, for all the DBABYs,” he said teasingly. 

“Oh yeah. Okay. I’ll get out of here then.” She gave him one last peck on the lips. 

“Don’t go,” he begged, pulling on her hand when she turned to walk away. 

“Ze, it’s basically a public event. It’s okay. I have stuff to do in the studio.”

“I’m sorry,” he said sadly. 

At that she turned and took his face in her hands. “Don’t be. I’ll go watch it live just like all the other DBABYs. I’m just one of them.”

“You’re the most important one though,” he pouted. 

“Come find me after.” She kissed his pout. Quanzhe handed her her phone as she went out past the managers who were looking for a spot to have him chat from. They tested all the lamps and different spots from the couch and chair she’d picked out for the best spot. 

In her own studio she listened to the live chat and laughed at all his awkward moments while she arranged and connected equipment. Most of it she had bought months ago just before she lost her motivation. She was glad to finally give it all a home and with it a new motivation. She and Quanzhe were planning to make his song the first one recorded there once the room was complete. After his chat was over she put on her Ding Zeren playlist and waited for him to come to her. It took a few minutes while his managers talked to him about the coming days, but he hurried them away as fast as possible. When he let himself into the apartment she was connecting a microphone to the interface. 

“Are you listening to my birthday single?” he asked, hearing the familiar song play from her phone. 

“Yes. It’s great. You should be really proud,” she smiled. 

“How are things going in here?” he asked, wrapping his arms around her while she leaned over the computer desk to check something on the monitor. 

“It’s coming along. You wanna help me test that mic?” she asked as she clicked. Zeren walked across the room to the microphone she had just hooked up while she slipped on a pair of headphones. “Okay, just say or sing anything,” she told him. 

“I love you, Zhu Zhengqiao,” he said into the mic. 

She looked over at him. “Did you say something?” He nodded his head. “Hold on,” she said, checking all the connections and checking all the appropriate settings on the screen. “Okay, try again.”

“I love you, Zhu Zhengqiao,” he said again. 

She smiled and shook her head. “That’s recorded forever now,” she told him, slipping off the headset. 

“Perfect. You can listen to it anytime you need to hear it and know that it’s true.” He put his arms around her once more and looked all around the room. “Do the boys know you took the biggest room?” he wondered.

“Well, I’m paying half the rent, so they can suck it up. They only need a bed anyway,” she said. 

“And is that my guitar?” he asked. 

“Oh, yeah. I was using it to check the acoustics yesterday,” she explained. “You can take it back.”

He shook his head. “It’ll do more good here. I’m impressed, Qiao. This looks very professional.”

“It’s a work in progress, but that’s the plan,” she sighed. “I’m going to produce as much of my own music as possible. I’m not going to let anyone hold my songs hostage anymore.”

“Does that mean you’ll produce some songs with me?” he wondered. 

“If you want to work with me, of course I will.” Her smile showed just how much she wished she could.

“I want to do everything with you,” he told her. “Come on. Let’s go eat dinner.” He pulled on her hand and she turned the lights off on her way out. 

“Have you been sleeping in here?” Zeren asked, looking at the unmade bed when they entered the bedroom in his apartment later. 

“Um, yeah. We don’t have beds over at the other place yet,” she explained. 

He couldn’t help but laugh. “You would set up your studio before your bedroom.”

“Hey, I set up your studio, first. At least I’ve put my clothes up in my closet,” she argued. 

“Yes, but you have almost no clothes,” he continued to laugh. 

“What can I say? I have priorities.” She shrugged. “Besides, I have a bed here, don’t I?”

“That you do. You can sleep in my bed anytime,” he agreed. “Except tonight. Tonight, I don’t think you’ll be getting much sleep,” he teased, pulling her close and kissing her slowly and sensually. “Tonight there are other things I want to do with you,” he said, low and quiet. 

“Everything?” she asked. 

“Pretty much,” he chuckled. 

“Whatever you want, birthday boy.”

_“Whatever I want, baby?” He took her hand and rubbed it firmly over his hardening cock._

_“Of course, I’ll do anything for you, daddy. Even if it’s not your birthday.” She used her other hand to unbuckle his belt._

_“You’re such a good girl,” he breathed._

_“Tell me what you want, daddy.” Slowly she pulled his belt through the loops of his black slacks._

_He hummed and ran his thumb over her bottom lip. “I wanna feel my cock in your gorgeous mouth.”_

_She hummed back and sank down to her knees. Slowly she unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, then pulled them down with his boxers, carefully lifting his feet out of them one at a time. Firmly, she gripped his cock in both hands and stroked him to make him fully hard._

_“Take your shirt off, baby,” he said quietly and she obeyed. Gently she kissed the tip of his cock and let her tongue out to taste his head. She licked off a little precum with the tip of her tongue. She lifted him up to lick his length from base to tip before she took his head into her mouth. Her tongue swirled around him, making him shiver._

_“The guys on the show think I’m inexperienced, but they don’t know I have the best girl who gives the best head,” he told her through moans as she sucked gently on him. He brushed her hair back with his fingers and gathered it so he could see more of her face as she slowly took more and more of him into her mouth while increasing her tempo. He enjoyed the wet, sloppy sounds she made while she worked him and the soft choking sounds that came from her as he hit the back of her throat when he thrusted into her a little._

_“Fuck, Qiao,” he breathed jaggedly. She popped off of him for a moment to catch her breath, but he lifted her up and tossed her onto the bed. Roughly, he peeled her jeans off her legs, not taking time to admire the lacy panties she had just bought and left them both in a pile on the floor. He pulled her to the edge of the bed by her thighs and centered himself on her. He rubbed himself against her wet folds before he slipped into her. Grabbing her knees as he thrust in and out of her slick heat, her ankles bobbed by his head._

_“You picked out the perfect bed. It’s just the right height to fuck you like this.” He thrust into her with a low grunt and she smiled at his mundane praise. “Oh, baby, did choking on my cock make you cry?” he asked, noticing the tears on her cheeks that she hadn’t even thought about. She couldn’t say anything to respond but moan as he continued to give her deep pumps. He leaned over her to wipe away the moisture and look into her eyes while the fingers of his other hand dug into her thigh. She grabbed his hand and took his thumb into her mouth, tasting the salt from the tears he’d just wiped away, and sucked on him._

_“Oh my god, Qiao, seriously. You’re gonna make me cum already, baby,” he whined._

_“That’s okay. Come for me, daddy. We’ll just do it again later,” she grinned._

_“Fuck,” he moaned as he came inside of her. He pulled out of her very slowly and used a towel to clean her and himself._

Qiao moved the blanket aside and made a space, inviting him into his bed for the first time. He crawled in beside her and held her on his chest, covering them both with the blanket. 

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” he said against her hair. “I’ve missed your voice. It sucks that I can’t call you because there are too many cameras and microphones around all the time,” he lamented. 

“Speaking of which, you said there was something you wanted to tell me about dinner the other night?” 

“Oh, right. You’ll love this,” he laughed as he began to tell her about his first official night at Shine! Super Brothers.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aw man, Qiao's about to make some moves, and so is Zeren. 
> 
> It feels fitting that the show is officially starting at this point in my story just as it's ending in real life. That was always the plan. He didn't win (whatever that even means???) but I feel like he accomplished a lot and I'm so proud of him. Qiao's obviously going to be very proud of him, too. From here on out I'll be including a lot of details about the show, but with my own interpretation, so obviously not everything is going to be accurate. This is fiction after all. Feel free to talk to me about it in the comments. <3

This show was nothing like Idol Producer, and that quickly became apparent to Zeren. For starters, all of the men on this show had already debuted and had careers with varying levels of success. And they were all men. He was the youngest, a fact that they never failed to mention at every possible opportunity. In fact, the next person in age to him was Li Wenhan, who was five years older than him and, Zeren couldn’t forget, mysteriously obsessed with his girlfriend. Since they all had active careers the show wouldn’t require months of endless training and instead would shoot on a condensed and somewhat sporadic schedule that allowed the men to participate in other activities. For him, he was happy this would give him the ability to spend time at home, with Qiao. As a bonus, they never had their phones taken away, although they were encouraged to use their promotional phones whenever filming.

The first couple of days were spent shooting promotional material before he even really met the other brothers. When he saw Wang Dongcheng he found himself unable to contain his excitement and made sure they shared a room together. The older man found it a little odd at first how the youngest brother admired him, but it didn’t take long for Dong-ge to warm up to him. 

The first real challenge he faced was when they had a group dinner after moving into the dorms. The jiejies hosting the show asked the group many questions about their skills and careers that they discussed as a group. One question in particular seemed intended to single him out. When the hosts asked about how much control the brothers had over their personal lives, they couldn’t resist pointing out Zeren because he had debuted most recently. 

“Really, after debut you just have to be obedient,” he told them seriously, feeling the pressure. 

“What about a girlfriend?” Xiaodong-ge asked.

Zeren’s eyes went wide. “I-I don’t-I don’t have a girlfriend,” he sputtered. All the geges laughed. 

“Look, he’s scared to death,” Wu Jiacheng laughed. “No, no, no,” he mocked

“What if you like a girl though?” the brother persisted. 

Zeren gasped for an answer. 

“What if you can’t sing love songs, because you are inexperienced?” After Journey laughed.

“You guys are so bad,” Zhipeng-ge, the oldest, said, feeling sympathy for the young man. 

Zeren swallowed hard. He wanted to say that he did know love. He wasn’t inexperienced. That his girl was the best in the whole world. But he knew he couldn’t say anything to defend himself. Li Wenhan looked at him intently. He had heard from Yibo that at one point Zeren also liked Zhengqiao. He also knew what it was like for Yuehua to still control his personal life, even though he hadn’t been singled out. Zeren mumbled some incoherent denial of having any personal life at all. 

“Don’t feel bad, little brother,” After Journey told him. 

“You’re still young,” Xiao Wu assured him. 

“Okay, okay,” Jin-jie said, releasing him from his torture. 

“Oh my god, I’m still alive,” Zeren said, patting his face. “I’m sweating so much, I’m soaked,” he joked to the brothers near him. 

“It’s okay,” Dong-ge said, patting him on the shoulder. “Someday you can have a life, find a girl,” he assured the young man. Zeren sighed, wishing he could just be honest. It was one thing to walk out of the house and pretend that he wasn’t in a relationship with Qiao, to never be with her in public. This felt more like lying when he was asked point blank and said she didn’t exist. 

“Hey, bro, what’s up?” Li Wenhan said when he caught up to Zeren in the hallway on the way back to their rooms after dinner. 

“Hey, Wenhan, how’s it going?” Zeren replied, a little disinterestedly. 

“I’m good. How’s Zhengqiao?” Wenhan asked, as if it were the most casual thing for him to inquire about.

Zeren stopped at the top of the stairs and turned to the older brother from his company. He looked him up and down for a moment before speaking. “Actually, she’s wondering why you always ask all of us about her?” It was him. It was Zeren who wondered that. Xinchun had mentioned this happening months ago, and Zhengting said he even asked when they were last together filming the first episode of Super Hit.

“We’re old friends from Korea, you know,” Wenhan said nervously as other brothers walked past. 

Dong-ge realized Zeren wasn’t next to him anymore and turned back. “Who’s Zhengqiao?” he wondered. 

“Qiao-jie is the sister of one of my bandmates. She writes songs for our company,” Zeren tried to say as flatly as possible, but he’d used the familiar term on purpose. “I think she and Wenhan used to date.” He was fishing a little bit. 

“Oh, no. We didn’t date. She didn’t like me like that,” Wenhan said, a little sadly. Zeren felt relieved. 

“So, how come you always ask us about her instead of asking her directly how she’s doing?” Zeren wondered. 

“Oh, well, she changed her number when she moved back to China, and she deleted all her social media for some reason this summer, so I don’t know how to get in touch with her, but I heard she lives with you guys,” he admitted. “Hey! Do you think you could give her my number?” Wenhan asked. 

“Yeah, sure,” Zeren said before turning to walk away without getting Wenhan’s number first. “Oh, she’s fine, by the way,” Zeren said over his shoulder. 

“So, who’s this Zhengqiao girl, anyway? She lives with you? What’s she like?” Dong-ge asked when they got into their room. 

“She’s just a friend,” Zeren lied, unable to look at his idol. “We wrote a song together.” He couldn’t quite hide his smile when he said it. 

“What song? I wonder if I’ve heard it.” Zeren squashed the impulse to suggest that he had definitely heard it. _It was a number one hit._

“It’s called ‘Show You’,” he said, walking from the sitting area out to the balcony and then into the bedroom. 

“You mean this one?!” Dong-ge asked excitedly, following him out onto the balcony and easily finding the song from his favorite playlist.

“I love this song!” Zeren heard from the balcony where other brothers were hanging out. 

“Xiao Ding, you wrote this?” Dong-ge continued, eliciting questions from the others gathered outside. Zeren joined them. 

“Well, I wrote the rap, she wrote the rest,” he admitted. _But it was inspired by her undying love for my dance skills,_ he resisted saying. He was satisfied by the fact that everyone seemed to enjoy dancing to it. He had to text Qiao, since he promised he would tell her whenever people complimented her work. 

Xiaodong walked into the bedroom while Zeren was texting Qiao. He examined the young man’s face and body language closely. “Who are you texting and smiling like that?” Xiaodong wanted to know. 

“Huh?” Zeren tried to play dumb. 

“What’s going on?” Dong-ge wondered, coming in from the cold balcony, closing the door behind him. 

“I think maybe Zeren was hiding something earlier. He’s smiling at his phone.”

“Who were you texting?”

“No one.”

“Oh my god was it-” 

Zeren shook his head fervently, giving Dong-ge a look to shut his damn mouth. “There are microphones everywhere,” he mouthed, circling his finger around in the air, hoping they would take the hint. The older brothers seemed to understand and let the subject go, but they were highly suspicious now. 

\----

“Aw, did poor Xiao Ding get teased by his geges?” Qiao said, patting his head when Zeren finished telling her about his first few days on the show. 

“I did. They were relentless,” he faked pouting. 

“Well, now you know how Quanzhe felt,” she said without any pity. 

“Hey, I don’t make fun of Quanzhe...anymore.”

“I know. He told me you’ve been a lot nicer to him since I came into your life. I’ve been a good influence.” She crossed her arms a sank into the pillows with a self-satisfied smile

“Of course, how could I ever hurt your little brother?” he responded sweetly. 

“Speaking of brothers, did yours tell you he’s looking at my contract?” Zeren shook his head. “Well, I sent it to him a couple of days ago.”

“What did he say?” Zeren drew lazy circles on her shoulder with his finger.

“He called in an absurd document that I never should have signed, but I already knew that,” she laughed a little, both at herself and the slight tickling sensation he was giving her. 

“Has he come up with any suggestions?” Zeren wondered, playing with her fingers.

She shrugged. “He’s coming by tomorrow at eleven to talk about it.”

“My managers are coming over at eleven to talk about preparations for the next segment of the show,” Zeren told her. 

“That’s fine. Perfect actually. It gives me an excuse to go hide in the studio,” she laughed. 

“You’re not afraid of the managers, are you?” Zeren asked.

“I’m not afraid. I just...I feel like I have a target on my back when it comes to everything Yuehua,” she admitted. 

“You really don’t understand that you’re the princess of Yuehua?” he asked.

“What the hell are you talking about? They hate me,” she grumbled.

“They do not. I think you’ve taken what happened with the album too personally,” he admitted. He’d been holding onto that opinion for a long time. She scoffed. “You should know it had nothing to do with you, or the worth of your songs. All anyone from Yuehua ever does is sing your praises, whether it’s me, Du Hua or even Li Wenhan.” She groaned. “Listen, the managers may be worried about our relationship getting out, but they don’t hate you like you think they do. They’re just very nervous. You don’t have to run and hide every time they come around.”

“Well, everyone may not like me so much in a few weeks,” she muttered, examining the ends of her hair.

“What exactly are you planning?” Zeren wondered. 

“I’ll give you the details after I meet with your brother. But…” She sighed, wringing her hands. 

“What is it?” He tipped her face to look up at him.

“Will you be mad at me if I leave Yuehua completely?” she wondered.

“Of course not. You do whatever you feel is best for you,” he assured her with a little squeeze. “I’m not going to hold it against you, and neither will any of the other brothers. But Yuehua is a big company with a lot of resources. Are you sure you want to break with them completely?”

She sighed. “I really don’t. I know they’ve given me a lot of opportunities. I don’t always like what they do, and I don’t always understand what’s going on in Du Hua’s mind, but I like her. I feel like she challenges me, and I appreciate that. I just don’t want to be taken advantage of anymore. It may be that we have no contract anymore. I’ll offer songs to them and others when I see fit. I’m not looking to break with them completely. I just want something where we both win.”

“That sounds reasonable. You have my support, whatever you decide. I would rather have you feeling motivated and working somewhere else than be as miserable as you have been recently.” 

“Thank you. That means a lot.” She paused for a moment, wondering if she should ask the question on her mind, but she decided to go ahead anyway. “Why did you mention Wenhan singing my praises earlier?” she asked with an eyebrow raised. 

He laughed at her abrupt change of topic. “I don’t know what you did to the poor boy, but he is complete trash for you, and he knows he has no chance. He just can’t get over you, apparently. I can’t blame him. I’ll never get over you either.”

“You didn’t tell him we were together, did you?”

“No. But he did ask me to give you his number,” he remembered

“Why?” she asked with a surprised expression

“I guess he’s just really curious how you’re doing,” he shrugged. “Do you want his number?” 

She laughed. “No. I don’t have anything to talk to him about.”

“Hm,” Zeren hummed curiously, but he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Instead, he pressed a kiss into her temple, followed by another one on her cheek, and another right next to her ear. He nibbled gently on her ear lobe and enjoyed the sound of her sharp intake of air as tingles went through her body. 

\----

Zeren’s brother arrived right on time, narrowly missing the arrival of Zeren’s managers. She greeted him at the door of her apartment. 

“Hello, welcome, uh…”

“Just call me Junjie,” he said with a smile. He seemed to be a lot like his brother, serious exterior, but with a warm smile.

“Junjie, nice to finally meet you. Zeren has said great things about you,” she smiled back. 

“Is he here?” the man wondered, looking around. 

“He’s meeting with his managers next door. I thought it would be better if we met here. We’ll go to the studio.” It was the only place in her apartment that really had a place to sit so far, even if it was just a table and chair. “Sorry, I’m still getting organized over here,” she admitted. 

“Wow, this looks like quite the operation,” he admired. 

“I hope so,” she said and gestured for him to sit. 

“Okay, let’s get down to it then.” He opened his briefcase and pulled out the copy of the contract she had sent him and a pen. “I’ve taken a look at this contract. You’ve never had a lawyer look at it before, have you?”

“Um, no,” she admitted with a small laugh. “I was, what the word? Broke, at the time.”

“Well, it’s good you called me. So, they ended the lease on the apartment and didn’t offer you an alternative?” he asked and she nodded. “We can definitely get you out of this. However, I don’t know that there’s much we can do to get your songs back unless we use them as a part of negotiation. Are you interested in negotiating a new contract with them or are you looking to cut ties completely.”

“What kind of contract do you think I could get?” she asked, leaning forward. 

“It really depends on what you want and what you’re willing to do. If you’re still interested in working with them, we could simply get the ball rolling and see what they are willing to do.” Qiao sat quietly for the moment. “What do you want, exactly?”

“I don’t want to cut ties. They’ve shown an interest in me as an artist before and I’ve worked as a producer. Ideally I would like to produce my own work and partner with them for distribution and artists, etc.”

“As your own studio?” he asked, looking around. 

“Exactly.”

“Well, if you’re interested in that I can help you organize to establish your own studio as a business. Then you could negotiate with them on another level.”

“Really? How long would that take?”

“A week or two to file paperwork,” he shrugged. “What else do you want?”

“I want my songs ‘Mama’ and ‘She’s mine,’ back. Actually, I’m flexible on ‘Mama’, but the other one is serious.”

“Is that it?”

“One last thing. My relationship with Zeren isn’t on the table whatsoever. The slightest mention of a formal restriction on that topic and I’ll walk away.”

Junjie's serious expression softened a bit. “You love him a lot, don’t you?” 

“More than anything,” she said definitively.

He took a breath that caught in his throat. “I heard about what happened at my parents’. I’m sorry. My mother...she wants to be protective of him because she missed so many chances when he was growing up. She has a hard time accepting that he’s a man who makes his own decisions now. I’m sure she’ll come around eventually.”

“Thanks,” Qiao said, unconvinced. 

“Okay, let’s talk about what you’re willing to give in a negotiation,” he said, returning to business.

“To start, I’ll be producing a song with Li Quanzhe this week. That could be our first business collaboration.”

“How do you think they’ll feel about you working with one of their artists without their input?”

Qiao shrugged. “They can accept it or not. It’s a good song. They should be glad they don’t have to take on any of the production costs.”

“Okay, anything else?” he asked, jotting down notes

Qiao sighed. “Du Hua has been trying to convince me to take on modeling jobs for some time now. If necessary to get what I want, I am willing to let them manage me in that capacity.”

“Alright, then. Anything else you can think of?”

Qiao shook her head. “Not right now, but I’m willing to listen to offers from them.”

“That’s fine. I’ll be there to negotiate with you,” he promised, obviously recognizing her inability. “Now, let’s talk about what resources and assets you have for starting your business.” 

They spent half an hour going over the boring details of what she had. Zeren came knocking just as Junjie was packing up his briefcase. 

“Hey, ge,” Zeren said, coming in and giving his big brother a hug. “How did it go?”

“We’ve got some work to do. It’s going to take some time, but I think it will work out in Qiao’s favor,” he smiled. 

“Thank you so much for helping,” Zeren said sincerely. 

“Yeah, of course. You’re still going to get my bill, though.” Junjie clapped his younger brother on the shoulder. “I’ve got to go to another meeting, but I’ll get started on your paperwork, send your formal complaint to Yuehua and I’ll be in touch soon,” he assured them.

“Thank you,” the couple said together and saw him out the door. 

\----

“I’m so excited we are finally recording this,” Quanzhe smiled as he joined Qiao in her studio. 

“Me, too,” she smiled back, but then she pursed her lips. “Quanzhe, are you sure about this? I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and I don’t want to drag you into my battle with Yuehua if you’re not sure.”

Quanzhe nodded enthusiastically. “I’m sure. I want you to produce this song. At the very least it can’t hurt to present it to them. If they reject it, I’ll find a way to move forward from there. But I believe in you.”

“I appreciate that, Quanzhe. But I’m basically using you as a bargaining chip. I feel guilty,” she admitted. 

“Don’t worry about it. I don’t feel used. I brought this song to you because I think you’re a boss. I wanted you to do it. If it comes down to it I will tell them it was my idea.”

“Quanzhe…”

He brought a reassuring hand down on her shoulder. “Really, jie. This is what I want. Let's get started.”

Quanzhe had asked her to show him what the process was like for her to record the instrumental parts. He wanted to learn all the parts involved in making his own song. They spent hours in the studio together, making sure everything fit his standards as the writer and hers as the producer. She showed him how to operate the recording program so he could control it for her while she played various instruments, as well as how the midi worked for the instruments she didn’t have or couldn’t play. There were some kinks to work out as she was getting used to the new equipment and the set up, but they made good progress. It was already dark and they hadn’t even gotten to recording any vocals yet when Zeren came in. 

“I ordered dinner. Why don’t you guys come and eat,” he suggested, leaning in the door jam with his hands in his pockets. The duo nodded to each other and she saved their work before they left to join him. “It must be going well for you to have made Quanzhe forget about eating,” Zeren commented as he walked across the hallway holding Qiao’s hand. 

“Don’t be ugly,” she said, poking his side. “But, yeah, it’s coming together,” she smiled. 

“It’s great. You’re going to be so jealous,” Quanzhe teased. 

“I already am,” Zeren admitted, trying not to sound sad about it. 

Qiao reached up to kiss his cheek. “Don’t worry. If my plans work out, we’ll get our chance sooner or later,” she promised. 

“What exactly is your plan?” Zeren wanted to know as they sat down at the table.

“I’ll tell you the details after your brother and I go into negotiations,” she promised. 

“Why not tell me now?” he pouted.

“I don’t want to jinx it,” she told him. He couldn’t help but feel a little unsettled by her not telling him her dreams for the first time since he’d known her. 

“Does Quanzhe know?” he wondered. 

“Not all of it. Only the part that he’s a part of.”

“Well, what’s his part?” Zeren pushed. 

“If you must know I’m using Quanzhe’s song as a bargaining chip to get our song back from Yuehua,” she admitted.

“Why do you want our song back?” he asked, putting food into her bowl. 

“I feel very attached to it. If they have it they can let anyone they want record it. They don’t have to include me or you or anyone else in it. And it’s our song, so we should be the ones to record it,” she insisted. “Can you imagine if they let Yibo record it? Ugh. I’d die.”

“But, they may never let us do that,” Zeren told her, frowning. It had been him telling her just a couple of months ago that they would get to work together again, yet here he was Mr. Doom-and-Gloom.

“Hence, the plan.” She smiled optimistically. 

After dinner they called Wenjun together to wish him a happy birthday, and Qiao felt sad she couldn’t do something special for him, not knowing when she would get to see him again. 

Between working on Quanzhe’s song, Qiao helped Zeren practice for his first solo stage. She recorded him dancing so he could review and worked endlessly to improve the choreography that he created all on his own and had already perfected while working on his video. Several nights Qiao had to drag him to bed with her late at night when he refused to leave the studio despite being exhausted. He was feeling optimistic but maybe not confident, no matter what Qiao did to try to encourage him, by the time he left for Wuxi again.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zeren records his first solo stage. Qiao renegotiates her contract. 
> 
> Supposedly, "Sisters Who Make Waves" was a show somewhat similar to "Shine Super Brothers" and I can't stop thinking about that phrase and applying it to Qiao. 
> 
> I kind of packed a lot into this update. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't know how the music industry works.

Zeren snuck very quietly out of his tent, careful not to wake Yin Xiaotian. He was glad that this show wasn’t as strict as Idol Producer. They weren’t going to confiscate the phones of twenty-one fully grown men. Still, it wasn’t easy for him to make the kind of phone call he wanted to make. So far he’d managed not to reveal his relationship with Qiao to any of the brothers, even as he’d sweated through their interrogation at the welcome dinner. But all he’d wanted to do since he’d walked off that horrible stage after the first performance was call her, so he had to sneak out in the dead of night to do it. 

It was freezing and dark, but even the film crew was inside, nice and warm and not watching him like a hawk, and it was his only chance. In fact, the only good thing about being punished with sleeping in the tent was that it was easier to sneak off and have a private conversation. He walked toward the far end of the yard, as far as he could get from the building and the tents. He found himself a dark corner and checked all around for cameras. He couldn’t see any, so he pulled out his phone and called Qiao. 

“Hello?” she asked sleepily when she answered after several rings. 

“Hey. It’s me. I’m sorry to wake you up,” he said apologetically. 

“Is everything okay?” she asked nervously.

“I can’t sleep. Can you talk to me for a little bit?”

She could hear the sadness and defeat in his voice, and she pulled herself up to a sitting position to wake up. “Of course. Tell me what’s wrong, baby.”

“I miss you,” he said, smiling in spite of his words. “I bet you’re nice and warm in bed right now.”

She huffed a little laugh. “I am. I miss you, too. But that’s not why you called, is it?”

He sighed and watched his breath drift out into the night. “It’s cold. They have me sleeping out in a tent.” He didn’t know why he was beating around the bush so much, wasting her time when she should be sleeping. He had called her in the middle of the night to seek her advice and support, or maybe it was just to hear her voice and a little sympathy. He wasn’t sure anymore, either way he knew he needed to get to the point. 

“What? It must be freezing out there. Why are they making you do that?” her voice came through the phone dripping in concern, bordering on the voice she used when she thought something was unfair.

“It’s really not that bad.” Xiaotian had come into his tent and that provided a little extra warmth. “It’s my punishment.” He looked at the ground in shame, even if he was alone.  
“Punishment for what?” she wondered. He could imagine the crinkle between her eyebrows when she said it. 

“For winding up in 19th place at tonight’s performance. The bottom three of us got kicked out of the dorms,” he finally admitted. 

“What? What happened?” Even half asleep she found that hard to believe.

“I messed up,” he said simply. “I didn’t put on a good performance.”

Her face scrunched up, her lips pursed. “What happened? You practiced so hard.”

“It was going fine. At the end my equipment cut out. I couldn’t hear anything, and I messed up the last line of the song. I worked so hard on the dance, and I didn’t think enough about the singing.”

“Hmm,” Qiao pondered for a moment. “You couldn’t hear the music?”

“I’m not making any excuses,” Zeren said suddenly. 

“I didn’t think you were. These things happen, Ze. I’m sure your overall performance was excellent.” 

Zeren sighed heavily. “The audience didn’t seem to think so. I got the third lowest score of the night. I have to fight for a spot in the next competition.”

“You can do it!” she cheered. “You’re not out of the competition. The live scores won’t matter as much as the online voting, anyway, right? You’ll just focus more on your singing for the next one. I can help you.”

Zeren cleared his throat. “Jin-jie said that I was used to the comfort of the group, and I didn’t have enough confidence in my own voice.”

Qiao paused. She was too tired to find something more diplomatic to say. “Well,” she hedged. “She may not be wrong. But it isn’t because you aren’t talented. You have a great voice. You just haven’t had that many opportunities to shine with it. You’ve only performed a solo a handful of times, and you’ve never dealt with a mishap like this before. It doesn’t mean you’re bad. You just have to learn from it. Keep fighting.”

“What if I’m only good as a dancer?” he wondered. The thought had been eating at him. 

“Well, I don’t think that’s true. And even if it were you’re better at dancing than almost anyone is as almost anything else. But I still think you have a lot of potential as a singer. That’s a hard song. You had an obstacle, and you’ll learn to overcome it.” At least she sounded confident. He didn’t say anything for a moment, just watched his breath swirl and tried to let her words take root in his heart. “I wish I could inject you with all the confidence I have for you. I believe in your talent, and I’ve never met anyone who works harder. You can do all of it, Zeren. You just need to have faith in yourself like I do.”

“Mmm.” Zeren smiled. 

“What?”

“I can feel it.” Even if he didn’t believe as much in himself, he could feel that she had as much faith in him as he had in her. And he wasn’t wrong about her. “I wish I could hold you,” he said quietly. 

“Me, too. I miss your touch, and spending time with you.” 

“I’m sorry.”

She shook her head even though he couldn’t see her. “It’s okay. We’re both working at least. Junjie and I have our meeting in a couple days.”

“I guess I’d better let you get some sleep.”

“Ze?”

“Yeah, babe?”

“I love you. No matter how far apart, no matter what struggle you have, no matter how you perform, I love you, and I’m cheering for you.”

A smile spread across his face and he felt warmth spread through his chest, tingling into his fingers. “See? I’m winning already.”

“Get some rest so you can get back at it. And remember, the harder you work…”

“The luckier you are,” he finished for her. “I love you.”

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” Zeren hung up, smiling and feeling much lighter than before. He shoved his hands in his pockets and walked back to the tent. 

“Is everything okay?” Xiaotian asked as Zeren crawled back into the tent. He’d awoken when the younger man left, but was too tired to get up and move back to his own tent.   
Besides, it had only gotten colder. 

“Yeah, fine. Sorry I woke you. I just...needed to talk to a friend,” Zeren admitted. 

“Must be a pretty good friend to answer in the middle of the night,” Xiaotian smiled. 

“Yeah, they are.” Zeren tried not to smile too broadly. 

“Can you sleep now?” Xiaotian asked. Zeren nodded and laid back down with the older brother, and the two huddled together for warmth. 

A moment later he sat up again. “You know what? Screw this. They can’t keep us out here like this. It’s dangerous for our health. I’m going to talk to someone.” Zeren got up and unzipped the tent and his two brothers followed him inside to find the director. 

\----

Qiao and Junjie entered the meeting with Du Hua confidently. Qiao had made the cookies Du Hua liked, and she also came with a file of Quanzhe’s single. She wanted negotiations to go as amicably as possible, but she also wanted to get everything she asked for. She felt like she might actually get it, having Junjie as back up for the very first time. The pair were invited to sit, and both parties stared each other down for a moment. 

“We’ve reviewed your complaint,” one of the men at Du Hua’s side began. “We disagree with your characterization of events. Although we did inform your client that they would need to vacate their living quarters by the end of the year, she chose on her own to find a new place to live before asking for or being told about another option. Since that time hasn’t yet expired, we do not believe the company should be held accountable.” Qiao’s jaw fell open a little bit at being stopped at the first pass. “However,” the man continued after a moment, “Yuehua is willing to void the current contract for a new one.”

Qiao looked at her lawyer with wide eyes. He had told her before going in that she should let him do most of the talking, so she waited for his lead. 

“What kind of contract are we talking about?” he asked calmly. 

“Yuehua would like to represent Zhu Zhengqiao. As your client’s agent we would send her to receive specialized training for modelling and other publicity work on a temporary basis, organize work for your client, and promote her nationally.” Their lawyer slid a document over to hers and he flipped through the pages while a stale silence hung in the air. 

Junjie turned to her and spoke to her very quietly. “This is more or less what you expected. It mostly refers to modeling but it also leaves the door open to other possibilities. The rates are standard, nothing to worry about. You could sign this document as an artist, while we propose our own contract as a business.”

“Nothing in it about my relationships?” she confirmed. 

“Nothing that I can see,” he replied, so she nodded. “Alright, let’s continue. My client will consider this contract as an artist, but she has her own terms as a producer.” He reached in his briefcase for another document and passed it to his counterpart. “Zhu Zhengqiao has recently registered a business licence for her own studio through which she will produce all of her future work. She would partner with Yuehua Entertainment artists and record label for distribution under these conditions and rates.” 

The Yuehua lawyer took a moment to review the document. “These rates are higher than the average for producers and songwriters,” the lawyer told them. 

“Consider that the company would not pay any of the associated production costs for work coming out of Qiao Music Productions. Additionally, my client has already shown the company great talent and skill, as well as profitability,” Junjie argued. 

Their lawyer passed the document to Du Hua, who looked over it quickly. “Zhengqiao, you’re asking for an unprecedented level of freedom here,” the woman commented. 

Zhengqiao looked her in the eyes, the older woman’s expression as unfathomable as ever. “Some people say I’m breaking barriers in the industry. I figure I might as well break as many as possible,” Qiao told her confidently. 

A smile spread across Du Hua’s face. “This says that all rights to currently unproduced songs provided to Yuhehua under the previous contract revert back to their respective writers. That would be ‘Mama’ and ‘She’s mine,’ correct? That’s valuable material,” Du Hua argued. 

“My client has a track ready for release to exchange for the aforementioned works,” Junjie said, gesturing to Qiao. 

“This first production from Qiao Music Productions will be Li Quanzhe’s 20th birthday single,” Qiao told them before connecting her phone to the speaker and hitting play. 

Qiao looked expectantly at Du Hua again when the song finished. “Great work, as usual, Zhengqiao,” she responded. “We’ll each take a day or two to look over these contracts and iron out a few details and meet again soon,” Du Hua said, rising from her chair. 

“Do you think that went well?” Qiao asked as they got onto the empty elevator. 

“I do. You might just get what you want,” Junjie smiled. He looked at his watch. “Listen, I have to get to another meeting. Can we meet tomorrow to go over the details and talk about our next steps?” 

“Sure. Sounds good,” she smiled back. He hurried away as soon as the elevator doors opened, and she made her way home.

\----

Zeren entered the room quietly in the middle of the night, trying to make as little noise as possible as he stripped down to his boxers. Qiao had the bed nice and warm, and it was so comfortable to crawl into. For as quiet as he had tried to be, he couldn’t resist the urge to get close to her under the covers. 

She stirred. “You’re home,” Qiao mumbled happily. 

Zeren hummed as she cuddled up to him, feeling her warm skin against his. 

“How are you?” she wondered. 

“Let’s talk in a few hours. Go back to sleep,” he urged. She nodded against his chest and quickly slipped back into sleep. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep either, tired and enveloped in her warmth. 

When she really woke up in the morning Zeren was already awake, staring at the ceiling and stroking her arm lightly. 

“Hi,” she smiled peacefully at him. 

“Good morning,” he responded, and she could tell he was a little off. 

“What’s up, baby?” she wondered.

“Hm? Nothing,” he replied vaguely. 

She pursed her lips. It was too early in the morning to force him to tell her his feelings, so she opted for distraction instead. She put a hand to his cheek to turn his face so she could kiss him. “What time did you come in?” 

“Late,” he groaned, rubbing his forehead. 

“Oh, well, I’m glad you’re home now. How long will you stay?”

“Just a few days. How was your meeting yesterday?”

“I think it went well. Your brother seemed to think so. We’re meeting later this morning to go over the details. You can meet him with me, if you want,” she offered. 

“Does that mean I’ll get to know the details of your plan?” he wondered. She nodded. “I think I can make the time,” he tried to smile. 

“We still have some time now,” she grinned after looking at the clock. She kissed his cheek, drifting over to his ear and letting her lips wander down his neck. He smiled for real. 

“Didn’t you miss me?” she breathed over his collar bone. 

“So much,” he whispered back as her tongue met his nipple. 

…

“Okay, I’ve had a chance to look over their contract proposal and I’ve summarized the details. Basically, they want to send you to Seoul for one month to take modeling and media training classes. They will assign you an agent who will find modeling and media jobs for you, at a rate of 20% commission.”

“20%? That’s almost double my agent commission,” Zeren noted. 

“Well, the thing here is that she’ll probably be working a lot less than you do. A few gigs here and there. You have complete control over what you do and do not accept,” Junjie told her. “They’ve made the contract for two years.” 

Zeren turned to her, a serious look on his face. “I thought you didn’t want to model,” he said, almost sounding upset. 

Qiao scratched the back of her neck. “Well, I didn’t. But, they made an offer for me to bargain out of my previous contract. And I’ve been starting to think that it would be such a bad thing. You know, even if I’m working on music, I’ll still have a lot of down time, and it wouldn’t kill me to have a second income and a reason to leave the house. I think that’s part of why I was so depressed the last few months,” she admitted.

Zeren stood suddenly and paced away, running a hand through his hair. “Don’t you think this will make it even harder for us to see each other? And what about bringing Simba and Mumu next month like we were planning?”

“Zeren, we can work it out. We always do,” Qiao said calmly, turning in her chair to look at him. 

“Why are you doing this? You’re letting yourself be influenced by her again,” Zeren scolded, his frustration clear on his face, but it was incomprehensible to her. She’d never seen him react like this. Junjie just looked between them silently as they went back and forth. 

“Ze, I’m not. Why are you getting so upset?” she wondered, trying to keep her voice calm and soothing. 

“I just think this a bad idea.” His breathing was suddenly heavy and his face read. 

She stood up to face him. “Ze?” She tried to look into his face but he just turned away from her and went to his bedroom. She gaped at his brother for a moment. “I don’t know what’s happening, but I’d better go find out. Can you hang around for a bit?” she asked. Junjie nodded. “Help yourself to coffee or anything in the kitchen. I’ll be back.” She went down the hall and knocked quietly on the door. “Zeren?” she asked when there was no reply, but still no answer came, so she opened the door slowly. 

Zeren was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at his hands, his hair falling in front of his eyes. As she came to sit beside him, he raised a hand to his eye to keep a tear from falling. 

“Zeren, honey, what’s wrong?” she asked, running her fingers through his hair so she could see his face better and because she knew it soothed him. He shook his head very slightly, but it was almost hard to tell with how his whole body was trembling. His pain was clear on his face, and she could see he was working hard to hold it in. She got onto her knees so she could face him and scooted closer. “Ze, it’s me. You can tell me anything,” she said very softly. “This isn’t training, you can feel however you feel,” she promised. 

At that, he let a tear fall. He didn’t resist when she pulled him onto her shoulder and held him. 

“I’m sorry. I just feel really crappy. I keep replaying that whole night in my head, and I know I could have done better, and I could have practiced harder, but at the same time, I feel wronged. I didn’t expect what happened to happen, and I was totally unprepared. I just...I feel so conflicted and disappointed right now. It has nothing to do with you,” he mumbled at the end. 

She continued to stroke his hair and his neck with one hand while rubbing circles on his back with the other hand. “Honey, it’s okay. You have every right to feel disappointed, but I don’t want you to be disappointed in yourself. It’s just like you said, how could you have expected that to happen? It should have worked and the fact that it didn’t wasn’t your fault. And by the way, those women in the audience must be freaking clueless. I guess I could give them the benefit of the doubt that they didn’t understand what happened, but I know you put on an amazing show before that, and I am willing to fight every single one of them.”

Zeren chuckled lightly. “I’m sure you would.”

“I would! In fact, I want to know how to get into the next performance, that way I can hype you up, or if the worst happens kick some ass. Do you know how I can get in?” she wondered. 

“I’ll look into it,” he laughed again. He picked himself up to look at her, but didn’t say anything. 

“Everything is going to be okay, Zeren,” she promised. “Five seconds isn’t going to define you or keep you down. You’ve got more stages to go. And I just know you’re gonna blow it up.”

Zeren smiled and took her hand. “You really are my number one hype woman.”

She grinned smugly. “I’m the number one DBaby, remember? Captain of Zeren Protection Squad. Your number one fan from now until the end of time.”

“I’m sorry for blowing up earlier,” he apologized, looking guilty.

She shook her head. “Are you sure there’s nothing you’re upset about on that front? I will take your advice into serious consideration.”

“We should probably go back and listen to what he has to say, but really, if it’s what you want, or at least what you’re okay with, I don’t have a problem. I don’t know why I freaked out. We’ll always work it out, like you said. Besides, I know you’ll be great at it.” He kissed her on the cheek and then pulled her off the bed, still holding her hand as they walked back down to the kitchen. 

Junjie had helped himself to a bowl of cereal and stopped with the spoon halfway to his mouth when he saw the couple return. “I didn’t know how long you would be, and I didn’t eat breakfast this morning,” he said. 

“It’s fine,” Zeren laughed lightheartedly as he sat at the table. “You should come over for breakfast sometime. Qiao makes excellent pancakes.”

“I’d like that,” Junjie said between spoonfuls and smiled at the couple while he chewed. 

“So, I have a couple of questions,” Qiao said. Junjie nodded for her to go on as he drew in the last spoonful. “Firstly, are you sure there’s nothing in there about Zeren or any personal relationships?”

Junjie swallowed and then cleared his throat. “I’ve triple checked. Absolutely nothing at all about your personal life, your current partner or any future partners,” he confirmed.   
She gave Zeren’s hand a firm squeeze and he squeezed back. “Okay. Is there anything at all about recording or performing my own music?” she wondered. Zeren looked at her sideways. There was something about her tone he didn’t expect. 

Junjie squinted at her“Nothing specific. Is there something you're looking for?”

“Not really. I guess what I’m really wondering is, if, hypothetically, I wanted to record my own songs as an artist, not just a producer, would they take a cut of that as my agent?” Zeren’s confused look only deepened. 

Junjie shook his head. “No. The agent only gets a percentage of the work they procure for you. I assume recording yourself as an artist would be an agreement you had...with yourself,” he laughed lightly. 

“Okay, sorry, maybe that was a dumb question. My last question is, do you think we can negotiate it down to one year instead of two?” she asked. “I’m just wary of entering into any long term contract with them.” 

“Sure, that’s definitely possible,” he agreed.   
“Okay, great,” she exhaled happily. “Ze, any thoughts?” she asked with a smile. 

He raised his eyebrows at her and then shook his head. “Not as pertains to this contract.”

“Awesome, then we shall proceed. They’ve scheduled a meeting for two days from now,” Junjie informed her. 

“Sounds good,” she agreed. Junjie packed up his briefcase and they said their goodbyes.

As soon as he was gone Zeren turned to Qiao with a look that mixed confusion and excitement. “Why did you ask about recording your songs as an artist?” he wondered with a strange smile. 

She shrugged. “Just curious.”

“Qiao?” he said loudly as she turned and walked away to hide her smile. “Qiao, is this part of your plan?”

“Maybe. Could be,” she said vaguely. 

“When are you going to tell me?!” he groaned dramatically, wrapping himself around her and pulling her onto the couch. 

“Fine. My plan is get our song back, to collaborate with each of you guys for your own solos, and eventually to get Yuehua to let us release a duet, when the right time and the right song come to me,” she explained. 

“Elaborate. Where did you come up with that idea?” he wondered. 

“It came to me in a dream,” she smiled, and he kissed her cheek. 

“I feel like there’s still something I’m missing though.” 

“I might maybe possibly be considering recording my own mixed tape,” she admitted slowly. He was silent. She wriggled around in his arms to look at his face. “You think that’s a bad idea?”

“I think it's an absolutely wonderful idea. A magical idea. I’ve never heard of a better idea. I just wonder...why have you changed your mind?”

“You,” she smiled, and he gave her another quizzical look. “When you asked me what was important to me, I thought about how I hated that something I started wasn’t going to be created because I didn’t have control over it. I initially thought the solution to that would be at least being able to work with other companies, to market my songs to other artists, and I very much still want to do that. But then I thought about something like ‘She’s Mine’ and how that’s our song. And really I only want you to sing it, even if Du Mama will never release it, even if it only sits on my computer. There are other songs like that. Songs I don’t necessarily want other people to sing but that I want other people to hear. So, I may just have to do it myself.”

“Well, I personally cannot wait for you mixed tape,” he smiled again. 

“You’ll have to wait a little while, but I’ll keep you updated,” she promised. “Anyway, what are you planning for the rest of the day?” she wondered. 

“Dancing. I told Xiao Tian and Xiao Wu that I would get the choreography for our stage down so I could help them more,” he told her. 

“Cool, so what are you going to do with the other ten hours of the day?” she teased. 

“Seriously, Qiao. I have to make it perfect,” he said, stress entering his voice. 

“And you will. I know you will. Can I help?” she offered. 

“You want to learn choreography with me?” 

“Sure! I mean, if you can teach me you can definitely teach them,” she shrugged. 

She got changed and met him in the studio, where they spent the entire rest of the day. Qiao did a very good job of not complaining of exhaustion until he could see that she was about to drop and he let them stop for dinner. 

\----

Qiao felt calm going into their second meeting. She woke up with a good feeling, and she trusted her intuition. Still, she tried not to smile too much when she walked in, not wanting to seem arrogant. 

“Good morning,” Du Hua greeted as she came into the room last. “I’ve got a busy day, so let’s get right to it,” she said, taking her seat. 

“Very well,” Junjie agreed. “My client would like to reduce the contract term you have offered to one year.”

Du Hua nodded to her lawyer. “That’s fine. We will give the song ‘She’s Mine’ back to Ms. Zhu in exchange for Li Quanzhe’s single, but we will retain ‘Mama’ in our possession, with the offer to co-produce when the time is right.”

Qiao smiled at her lawyer and gave him a nod. He exchanged documents with the other lawyer. They both looked over it quickly and then passed them around to be signed. Du Hua signed quickly before she stood to shake Qiao’s hand. 

“We’ll be seeing you again soon,” she smiled.

Qiao took the copies of her new contracts and all the documents pertaining to her song and walked out with Junjie. She was surprised to find Zeren in the hallway waiting for her. She knew he was in the building meeting with his manager, but she didn’t expect to see him right there. 

“How did it go?” Zeren asked hopefully.

“Perfectly. She got everything she wanted,” Junjie grinned. 

“I couldn’t have done it without you,” she said, giving him a nudge with her elbow. 

“I think you probably could have. I think they would have given you anything you wanted,” he admitted. 

She rolled her eyes. “They just didn’t mess with me because I actually had a lawyer this time. Seriously. Thank you.”

Junjie shook his head. “Well, either way, it worked out.”

“It did,” she agreed, grinning ear to ear, practically bouncing.

“Hey, ge, you should come over for dinner tonight to celebrate,” Zeren offered.

“I wish I could,” he frowned. “But, listen, I’m going to talk to mom. See if I can’t convince her to give you guys a chance. I think Qiao’s going places, and I don’t want you to lose her.”

Qiao blushed and turned her face to the ground, but peered up at Zeren through her eyelashes. 

“Thanks, gege. I really appreciate that,” Zeren beamed. 

“No problem. I’ll see you later,” Junjie said, and excused himself. 

After his brother walked away Zeren looked up and down the hall to see if the coast was clear. Finding no one, he stepped into Qiao and kissed her sweetly on the lips. “I’m so proud of you,” he whispered. 

She smiled. “You know, I’m proud of me, too,” she agreed.

“I’ll see you at home,” he said, and she nodded as he walked away just as someone was entering the hall.

**Author's Note:**

> If you're just checking this work out for the first time: Welcome! Thanks for stopping here. 
> 
> If you're one of my regular readers, I'm really so incredibly thankful for you. I don't know who any of you are, but you seriously make me happy every day when I see you have checked on this mess. I hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> I would love to hear from you in the comments! <3


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